“But what if it was her?”
I tried to keep my wits as he alternately nipped at, and laved my neck with his tongue and mouth.
Dan shrugged. “If it was, we’ll deal with it.” He lifted his head and placed a gentle kiss on my lips. “I don’t plan on keeping this from her much longer anyway.”
My initial reaction to his last statement was to panic. After all, Lexi has never met anyone Dan’s been romantically involved with…a fact that I have not only heard from Dan and various others but also from Lexi herself.
So why me? Why now? Is he that sure of this relationship? Or is the fact that his daughter is already so attached to me motivating him to tell her about us?
I quickly dismissed the latter thought, knowing it would be much worse if I were to leave once Lexi knows we’re involved. I also know that Dan is that sure of this relationship. Even before I let him into my bed, he’d laid it all on the line. He wants me in his life. Permanently.
I’m the one with all the issues. I know I love him—have always loved him—but can I trust him? He hasn’t given me any reason to believe his intentions are anything but pure, but then he never did. Basically, it comes down to the fact that my heart wants to believe him, but my head doesn’t. Which will win out is anyone’s guess.
“Bri?” I could tell from his tone that it wasn’t the first time he’d said my name.
“Hmmm?”
“Are you okay?”
I smiled in what I hoped was a reassuring way. “I’m great.”
Dan’s green eyes scanned over me as if to gauge the truth of my words. He must have been satisfied with what he saw, because he smiled then nodded and said, “Then let’s go get us some ice cream.”
Chapter Twenty-five
As we drove to the ice cream parlor, my eyes kept straying to the man behind the wheel. Ray Bans shaded his eyes and a look of utter contentment covered his face. His left hand rested on his thigh, while the right one loosely gripped the wheel, his thumb tapping in time to the song on the radio.
He must have felt me watching him, because he turned his head my way. Even through the dark shades, his gaze burned me. “What?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
“Why are you looking at me?”
“Maybe I just like looking at you,” I answered, honestly.
He seemed to think about that for a moment. “Yeah?” He sounded inordinately pleased.
I nodded. “Yeah.”
He inclined his head slightly toward me and in a stage whisper said, “I like looking at you too.”
His smile nearly melted my heart.
Snickering from the back seat pulled my eyes from Dan. I looked back and found Lexi and Tori grinning from ear to ear.
“What’s so funny?” I asked, trying to sound light-hearted.
Lexi removed her headphones from one ear and said, “Huh?”
“I asked what’s so funny?”
She and Tori shared a conspiratorial look before they both faced me once again. “Private joke,” they said in unison.
They giggled again as Lexi replaced her headphones and turned up the volume on the iPod she and Tori were both plugged into.
****
I spooned the last of my ice cream into my mouth, then sat back and placed my hand on my overstuffed stomach.
“Why did you let me eat the whole thing?” I groaned. “I feel like I’m gonna bust.”
Dan chuckled. “Like I’m strong enough to stand between you and ice cream.”
“It’s my only vice…well, ice cream and coffee.”
I looked up at Dan and my stomach somehow managed to do a flip-flop. His eyes practically devoured me. The air between us felt so charged, I expected the table to burst into flames.
“Did I tell you how beautiful you look today?” His voice was low and husky and as sexy as hell. The abrupt change of subject, not to mention the let-me-fuck-you-right-now look in his eyes made me shiver. My mouth went instantly dry and other parts of my anatomy became instantly, not so dry. I blushed, but it was more out of anticipation than embarrassment.
“Well?” he prompted.
“I, uh, I think you mentioned it when you snuck into my room this morning.”
“That was you?” His smile was devilish.
“Don’t you recognize me without my rooster hair and morning breath?”
He opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by Lexi. “Can I have some more money, Daddy?”
Dan leaned forward and pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. Flipping it open, he perused the contents. “Twenty is the smallest I have. Let me go get change.” He stood. “I’ll be right back.”
Once he was away from the table, Lexi jumped into his seat, a smile plastered across her face.
“Having fun?” I asked.
She nodded.
“Where’s Tori?”
“She’s over there.” She pointed across the room. “Playing pinball.”
“Pinball?” She nodded again. “I didn’t know kids still played that.”
She shrugged. “Sure we do.” Then, in the next breath, she said, “I saw you and Daddy kissing this morning.”
I tried to remain calm and think of something intelligent to say, but I felt like I’d been sucker-punched. “You did?” was all I could manage to squeak out.
She bobbed her head up and down. “Uh huh.”
I glanced in the direction Dan had disappeared, hoping to find him coming my way. I sighed. No such luck. I looked at Lexi’s smiling face again.
Well, at least she’s not upset about it.
“Do you guys do that a lot?” she asked.
“What?”
“Kiss.”
“Uh, no.” It wasn’t exactly a lie. After all, we don’t kiss half as much as I’d like to. And if they look on Dan’s face is anything to go by, he agrees.
“Why not?” She actually sounded disappointed.
I prayed for Dan to return. “Uh, I don’t know.”
“Is it ‘cause of me?”
“Not really. No, definitely not.”
“Because if it is, I want you to know that I don’t care. If you kiss, that is.”
“You don’t?”
She shook her head and I watched her brown curls tumble around her shoulders. “I’ve been waiting for it to happen.”
“You have?”
Her head bobbed up and down again, and the curls tumbled back and forth. “For a long time.” She leaned forward, her elbows resting on the table between us. “I always knew you’d come back.”
Before I could ask what, exactly, she was talking about, Dan reappeared and handed her a cup of tokens.
“Thanks, Daddy.” That said, she hopped off his seat and ran toward the game room.
“Why the frown?” Dan asked, as he slid into his seat.
“Lexi saw us this morning.”
Dan’s eyebrows raised. “What did she say?”
“Well,” I dragged out the word. “She asked if we do that a lot, and when I told her we don’t she asked why. Then she told me we should and that she’s happy about it.”
Dan let out a breath and sat back in his chair. He appeared to be deep in thought then he smiled. “Good.” He leaned forward and took my hand in his. “And I do agree with her…we should do it more often.”
I smiled at his words then frowned at my thoughts. Dan reached out and smoothed my brow.
“What’s wrong?”
I shrugged. “It’s probably nothing.”
“If it’s bothering you, it’s not nothing.”
“It’s just something she said.” His brow arched, urging me to continue. I told him the last two sentences his daughter had uttered and asked what he thought she meant.
“I have no idea,” he admitted, after thinking about it for a minute. “Maybe she’s still talking about when you went home for the weekend.”
“Maybe.”
“I’ll try to feel her out without sounding like I’m badgering her.” He to
ok a drink of water. “I’m just glad she’s okay with our relationship. After all, she’s had me all to herself for eight years.”
“I really do admire you for all you went through to keep her in your life.” When he didn’t comment, I went on. “I imagine being a single parent is difficult enough, but with the life you lead, it must be near to impossible.” Dan’s eyes hardened and his jaw tensed.
“The life I lead?” he asked, looking ready to pounce.
I nodded and took a sip of soda. “The travel, odd hours…”
“The parties, the women?” he asked.
“I didn’t say that.”
“You implied it.”
“I did not,” I said, utterly confused by his abrupt mood change. “I was trying to give you a compliment.” I felt my own temper rise, and fought like hell to tamp it down.
Dan’s glowing green gaze seared me. After what seemed like forever, he spoke in a semi-civil tone. “Do you think you’ll ever totally trust me?”
“I—”
“Are you going to try to deny the fact that you still doubt my sincerity?”
What could I say? The man reads me like a book. I’m just trying to figure out where all this is coming from.
“I’m trying, Dan,” I said, not really answering the question, but hoping to placate him.
“Well, try harder,” he growled.
Chapter Twenty-six
I stared at the ceiling and tried to figure out exactly where things had gone wrong at the ice cream parlor. We’d been having a great time, then one sentence—which I had intended to be a compliment—changed everything.
The rest of the day was filled with tense silence. Even Dan’s workout suffered. He was obviously pre-occupied with his thoughts and his form was off. I cut the session short and retired to my room, coward that I am.
Dan’s right about the fact that I have trust issues where he’s concerned, but I don’t think I’ve been obvious about it. Truth be told, I haven’t had a reason to be obvious about it. For the most part, we’ve been secluded from the outside world. The only woman around on a daily basis is Mrs. Evans, and I don’t think slightly chunky, white-haired, sixty-something women are Dan’s style.
A light tap on the door broke into my thoughts. I got off the bed and turned the knob. Even before the door was fully open, I knew Dan was on the other side. His spicy-citrus scent filled my nostrils as soon as the door cleared the jamb.
“Can I come in?”
I stepped aside and swept my hand in a welcoming gesture. After closing the door behind him, I sat down on the edge of the bed. He followed suit mere inches from me. Taking my hand in his, he studied my fingers for several seconds before speaking.
“I’m sorry about his afternoon, Bri.” He brushed his thumb across my knuckles and squeezed my hand before lifting his head and meeting my gaze once again. “I acted like a real ass.”
I had to laugh at his choice of words. “I did mean it as a compliment,” I said.
“I know, and thank you.” He dropped his gaze and studied my fingers again. “I just hate the fact that you don’t trust me.”
I wanted to deny his words, but how could I? I don’t trust him…not totally anyway. Certainly not the way I should. I’ve changed in the past ten years, so it only stands to reason that he would, too. Logically, I know this, but emotionally I can’t help myself from reverting back to a twenty-year-old with a broken heart. It’s not something I’m proud of, but it’s a fact.
Dan’s eyes met mine and my chest tightened. The look of anguish and longing on his face nearly broke my heart. It only got worse when he spoke.
“Do you think you’ll ever totally trust me?” His voice was soft, almost hoarse.
“I’m working on it,” was all I could say.
Dan pulled me into his arms and kissed me softly. The loving that followed was so slow, so languid, so sweet that I was moved to tears. We didn’t speak afterward. No words were necessary. All our thoughts and feelings had been conveyed through touch. I rested on my side and Dan curled his body around mine, holding me as though he’d never let go. And, at that moment, I gave up a prayer in hopes that he never would.
****
Dan’s smile greeted me in the kitchen the next morning, and due to the early hour, we were alone. He walked around the island and stopped directly in front of me. His eyes roamed over my face, seeming to devour me before his mouth settled on mine and did just that.
“Good morning,” he said when we finally managed to pull apart.
“Mmm hmmm,” I muttered, as I slipped my arms around his waist and rested my head against his chest.
“Sorry about my disappearing act last night.” He kissed the top of my head. “More than anything I wanted to wake up with you in my arms, then make love to you all morning.” His arms tightened, pulling me closer. There was a distinct bulge pressing into my stomach. I rubbed against him and smiled at his groan.
“I understand,” I said. “Though what you just described sounds like heaven.”
Dan pulled back and looked into my eyes. “You think so?”
“I do.”
If his kiss was any indication, I’d say my answer pleased him. His mouth opened over mine, hungry and demanding and I responded in kind. Tongues tangling, hands roaming, passions rising, I forgot where we were and lost myself in the sensations overtaking my body.
By slow degrees, Dan ended the kiss and pulled away. I watched through heavy lidded eyes as he drew a deep breath in through his nose and let it out slowly through his mouth. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, then let it drop to his neck and rubbed there.
“We’d better put a stop to that before I drag you to the table and bury myself deep inside you.” The way he said it sounded like a warning. Heeding it, I backed slowly away, hoping some space would cool us down.
Dan cleared his throat. “Mrs. Evans is off today, so if we want breakfast, it’s up to us.” He glanced at the coffee maker, then back at me. “I made coffee and it’s not too bad, if I do say so myself.”
His adorable smile took my breath away.
“Bri,” Dan growled. All his frustration and love was conveyed in that one short word. “Please don’t look at me like that.”
“Sorry,” I tried to sound repentant, but didn’t quite pull it off. My coquettish grin didn’t help matters either, I’m sure.
“Uh huh.” Dan’s own grin was devilish. “So, what about breakfast?”
“What do you usually eat when Mrs. Evans is off?”
“Cereal,” he answered. “And if you weren’t so busy hiding from me for the past month, you’d know that.”
I opened my mouth to protest, but decided against it. As amusing as sparring with Dan might be, my mood is way too mellow to rise to the occasion. Dan must have felt the same, because he let it drop.
“How about an omelet?” he asked, as he opened the refrigerator. “I think I have some ham and cheese.”
I couldn’t help but admire his backside as he bent over and searched the refrigerator. I was caught in the act when he straightened and glanced my way. I smiled letting him know I’d enjoyed the view.
Dan chuckled and pulled eggs, butter, ham, and a bag of shredded cheddar out of the refrigerator, closed the door with his foot, and placed the items on the counter.
“What can I do?” I asked.
He grabbed various bowls, plates, and utensils from their respective spots. “Sit back and watch Chef Dan create,” he said, with a flourish.
“Oh brother,” I said, rolling my eyes and climbing onto a stool.
“Seriously,” he said as he cracked eggs—one-handed, I might add—into a bowl and whisked them with some milk, salt and pepper. “Omelets are one of the few things I can cook well. I’m pretty good at French toast, too…that’s Lexi’s favorite.”
I watched as Dan concentrated on his task. The muscles of his back and arms flexed and bunched with his every move. I couldn’t help but remember how those same muscles felt to to
uch, to caress, to kiss. My temperature rose a few degrees.
“Bri?”
“Hmmm?” I practically purred.
“Do you want toast?” he asked around a knowing smile.
I nodded and stood up. “I’ll do it.”
His eyes roamed over my face before he smiled again. “Great.”
Once I stepped around the island and into the working area of the kitchen, the intimacy was nearly suffocating. With trembling hands, I took two slices of bread out of the bag and placed them in the toaster. It was after I turned the toaster on that I realized Dan was watching me.
“You okay?” he asked.
I nodded and concentrated on wiping the deer-in-the-headlights look off my face.
Dan placed his hand on my shoulder and his thumb traced slow circles as he kissed my lips. He pulled back and smiled. “It’s okay, honey.” Another light kiss was placed on mine before Dan pulled me into his embrace. “We’re just cooking breakfast here.”
I nodded again and snuggled into his chest. His words told me he understood my fears. And between his words and the warmth of his arms, I relaxed. Dan kissed the top of my head.
“Better?” he asked.
“Much,” I answered, before pulling him down for a soul-searing kiss.
“So you talked to Jodi yesterday?” Dan asked from his seat across the table from me. He cut his omelet into bite-sized pieces and popped one into his mouth. His eyes prompted me to answer his question.
“Yes, I did.” I cut a piece off my own omelet, but only had a chance to spear it with my fork before he spoke again.
“How much longer do I have you for?”
Leave it to Dan to get straight to the heart of the matter. I lifted my napkin from my lap and wiped my mouth. “Three weeks.”
Dan blinked. From the look on his face, I knew I’d shocked him. He opened his mouth to speak, closed it, then blinked again.
“Three weeks?”
“Three weeks,” I repeated.
He shook his head slowly. “Huh.”
“Is that good or bad?” I asked around a nervous laugh.
“Oh, honey, it’s definitely good,” he quickly assured me. “I’m just surprised.” The tips of his ears reddened. “I read your last report.” He shrugged. “It was lying on the desk in the den and I couldn’t resist.”
Girls You Marry Page 15