Fifteen Minutes: A Novel

by Karen Kingsbury

  She was part of a machine. All of it made sense now.

  She took a deep breath. They had a little time before the show went live. The energy onstage grew more intense and every seat in Carnegie Hall was filled. As Cullen told them about a few added commercial breaks, Chandra felt someone come up beside her. She turned and there he was. “Zack! You’re here!”

  “I got in a few hours ago.”

  “You’ll sing in the group number?”

  “I will.” He looked deeply at her. “You were right. About the cost.”

  “Yes.” She searched his eyes. “Did you make it home before she left?”

  “I did.” He leaned closer, keeping it private. “I told her I was sorry.”

  “And . . .” She wanted to believe the girl had changed her mind, that she’d forgiven Zack and stayed in Kentucky. But she could see that wasn’t the case.

  “We had a few minutes in the airport, but she left. She . . . doesn’t want me.”

  Chandra’s heart felt heavy. “I’m sorry.”

  He smiled. “My family and I, we’re doing well. I’m so grateful . . .” He looked up to the stage where Zoey and Kent were getting final makeup touches. He didn’t have to finish his sentence. He looked at Chandra again. “Thank you.”

  She nodded. “I heard you got a publishing deal.”

  “I did.” His smile reached his eyes, and for the first time since his Atlanta audition she could see all the way to his soul. “I’ll be songwriting from Kentucky, driving into Nashville once a month to meet with the label.”

  “Perfect.” She wanted to raise her hands in a victory dance. Zack had lost his girl, but he had escaped with his life. There would be no prison cell for Zack Dylan. She’d seen him in a number of interviews since his exit. He would be fine. She smiled at him. “Your family?”

  “The publishing deal came with an advance. We saved the farm.”

  Chandra couldn’t speak. Happy tears welled up and she nodded.

  “Oh, and AJ’s doing better. She has a new doctor.”

  Chandra took Zack’s hands in her own. “All of that . . . it’s exactly what I prayed for.”

  “God is good.”

  She felt the words to her core. The phrase was something she remembered from her parents, back when she was growing up. She finished the saying. “All the time.” No words could’ve touched her heart more.

  Zack had to take his seat in the front row with the other finalists. As he did, Chandra was overcome with a feeling as fulfilling as it was unfamiliar. Despite everything she’d lost, and regardless of the fame she would never escape, something was true that hadn’t been true before.

  Her life had meaning.

  ZACK FELT THE cameras on him and the others as the final show began. Something was different now. The cameras didn’t linger. He was no longer the one everyone talked about. That honor belonged to Zoey and Kent.

  A few minutes into the program a production assistant led the group backstage. For the first time, Zack saw Zoey. She had makeup and hair people on either side of her, and a bodyguard giving her instructions for the moment the show was finished. Somehow amid the chaos she must’ve sensed him watching her, because she turned and their eyes met. She mouthed, “Hi.”

  He raised his hand and did the same. The two of them hadn’t talked since his departure, and Zack doubted they would. Their run on the show was the only thing they’d ever had in common. He wondered if anyone had told her about Jesus. It was still something he wanted to do—though now he didn’t know when he’d get the chance. He did pray for her now and then.

  But they had both moved on.

  “Okay, people, you’re on in five.” The production assistant was the same. All of it was familiar—the setting and people and frenzied minutes backstage. But something else was different. Zack smiled when he realized what it was.

  He no longer belonged.

  The group number was one of their strongest yet, and Zack returned to his seat with the others to watch the show. Seated beside him were the newly married Nolan Cook and his wife, Ellie. Nolan was a star NBA player with the Atlanta Hawks, a guy known as much for his faith and good works as his jump shot. Not long ago Nolan and Ellie’s story had run in People magazine, and Zack had read it. Nolan was the real deal, a guy who had never compromised his faith or his love . . . despite the crazy temptations of the world he lived in. When he and Ellie were seated, Nolan introduced himself. Then he talked to Zack about joining his online Bible study. “Us guys need it.” Nolan had his arm around his pretty wife. “The world will eat you alive otherwise.”

  “I’m in, definitely.” Zack had been surprised that Nolan Cook even knew who he was. But he jumped at the chance to join the athlete’s Bible study.

  Now during the commercial break, Nolan leaned closer. “You were awesome in the group number.”

  “Thanks.” Zack raised his brow. “I was afraid everyone could see. You know, that my heart isn’t in it anymore.”

  “Not at all.” Nolan slung his arm around Zack’s shoulder and spoke lower than before. “Can I confess something?”

  “Sure, man.”

  “I was praying you’d get kicked off.”

  Zack chuckled. “You and everyone I know.”

  “And me.” Ellie leaned over her husband’s knees. “Add me to the list.”

  They all laughed and Nolan leaned back toward Ellie. The couple was beautiful, the picture of young married love. They were exactly how Zack had hoped to look when he married Reese. He held the image of the two for a few seconds and then looked away. He had lost too much to think about.

  The show continued and a number of celebrity guests performed including Chandra, whose new single would release tomorrow. Zack watched her perform, the grace and confidence, the way she owned the stage. She had told him once that she felt most alive when she was performing. When no one stood guard over her, no one could get to her.

  Moments like this.

  Zack watched one famous singer after another take the stage. What were they thinking? Deep inside when the noise grew dim? He shivered, thinking how close he’d come to being one of them. While Selena Gomez sang her new hit, Zack’s mind drifted back to the first days after he came home. He had held a meeting with his family and apologized. He told them how he hadn’t represented them well, and how sorry he was. Everyone forgave him. Grandpa Dan remained the most upset, but more because of Zack’s losing Reese. “I’ll believe she’s the girl for you as long as I live,” his grandpa had told him when the others left the room. “Don’t give up.”

  Zack had promised he wouldn’t. He didn’t deserve it, but he prayed every day that God would give him another chance with Reese Weatherly. He wondered if she’d seen his interviews after his kickoff. His comments that next week made headlines, even though that wasn’t his intent.

  Someone had asked him about his thoughts on shows like Fifteen Minutes, the wonderful opportunity provided for people who might not be discovered otherwise. It was a chance to simply nod and smile and confirm that singing competition shows were a tremendous gift to singers everywhere.

  That wasn’t what he said.

  “The whole thing kind of troubles me, actually,” he had said several times that week. “People were never meant to be idols. We aren’t supposed to be worshipped. Only God deserves that kind of praise.”

  For a full day that was all the news could talk about. “Zack Dylan Criticizes Fifteen Minutes.” Pundits called him a hypocrite and a sore loser. Then the commotion died down and the media tired of him. Zoey quickly became more interesting.

  Nicki Minaj joined Selena onstage, but Zack was too lost in thought to hear their song. He turned his eyes to Zoey, sitting to the side of the stage with Kent. The battle for her sanity had only begun. There was no telling the traps and pitfalls that lay ahead for her whether she won or not.

  Zack thought about his own future in music. His first song had already been picked up by Keith Urban—“Her Blue Eyes.” Radio hosts we
re saying the single could be the singer’s biggest hit in a while. Zack couldn’t get over God’s grace, the way he was being allowed to do what he loved and stay in Kentucky with his family and his church.

  But he would never get over what he’d lost for the sake of Fifteen Minutes.

  His Reese.

  She had texted him just once since she left. He had read the message so many times he knew her words by heart. We both lost over all this, Zack. But I have to ask you to respect my decision. Please . . . don’t contact me. I have to move on to whatever God has next for me.

  Her words had all but destroyed him. Though he would respect her wishes, he wouldn’t give up. Not until he heard she was engaged or taking up permanent residence in Europe. Until then he would keep praying, keep believing that somehow, somewhere down the road they might have a second chance.

  The show was winding down, the buildup leaving everyone in the audience on the edge of their seat. Again he and the other finalists were escorted to the backstage door as the announcement was made.

  Sure enough, the winner of season ten was Zoey Davis. On cue the group ran onto the stage as fireworks exploded and confetti fell over Carnegie Hall. They surrounded her, congratulating her the way they were supposed to. Then they took their places and joined her in the song that always ended a season of Fifteen Minutes. “Tell Me to Breathe” filled the concert hall. The song talked about being caught up in a dream, unable to believe that this moment was actually happening.

  As the song ended, Zack spotted Kelly Morgan’s husband and kids in the front section of the audience. Beside them were two older people, a woman and a frail-looking man. Kelly’s parents, no doubt. Last Zack heard, Kelly’s father was still in remission. So much had happened in the last three months, not all of it bad.

  When the show ended, the audience was ushered out and the finalists and judges and production team gathered onstage. The celebration continued, everyone congratulating Zoey and wishing one another well. Zack thought about approaching her, congratulating her or telling her that he’d been praying for her. But she was surrounded by far too many people, already being pulled into the life she would live from this day on.

  Zoey Davis, superstar.

  Zack slipped through the door to the backstage. He was ready to leave, but there was one thing he had to do first. He found a quiet corner and pulled out his phone. In no time he was on Zoey’s personal Facebook page. Through private message he wrote her a note that said what he hadn’t said earlier, what he hadn’t found time to say.

  Hey, it’s me. Zack. You were busy tonight, so I thought I’d tell you congratulations this way. Mostly because I have something else to tell you. First, I owe you an apology, Zoey. I didn’t want to wait another day before I said so. I’m sorry. How I acted over the last few months was wrong, and it wasn’t me. I should’ve been a better friend to you. A better boyfriend to Reese.

  Also, you asked me a couple times about Jesus—how to pray and all. I told you it’s easy. You just talk to Him like you’d talk to a friend. But I guess I wanted to be more specific. Talking to God isn’t the biggest part of it. The biggest part is getting right with Him, asking Him to be your Savior. Basically none of us can get to heaven on our own. We’re too messed up—I’m proof of that. So we need to admit the things we’ve done wrong and ask Jesus to forgive us. Then we need to ask Him to be our Savior.

  That’s what I should’ve told you when we were together.

  Living for God is a little more complicated—that’s why it’s good to find a church and a Bible. It’s a journey, for sure. Along the way you can talk to God whenever you want. I hope that makes sense. I’ll pray that you’ll look into it. Jesus is the only way out of here alive.

  That’s all, really. Again, I’m sorry. Be careful with all that’s ahead. And remember this—no one loves you as much as Jesus does.

  Your friend, Zack

  He read the note again before he sent it. As he did, a weight lifted from his shoulders. He pulled a beanie from his backpack and slipped it on. Then quietly he stepped out the side door onto West Fifty-seventh Street. He blended into the crowds as he walked in the other direction. A few blocks away he hailed a cab. “LaGuardia, please,” he told the driver. He would be home before midnight, which was good. Tomorrow would be a busy day.

  He had breakfast scheduled on the front porch with Grandpa Dan.

  chapter 31

  ONE YEAR LATER

  Zack pulled into the Kroger parking lot and killed the engine. It was his turn to make dinner—chicken and rice with steamed broccoli. One of the few meals he knew how to cook.

  He had moved into the house at the back of the farm, but he still shared meals with his family. Their time together was more special now—the way it had remained since his time on Fifteen Minutes. Life had found a normal rhythm, something Zack loved. He and Grandpa Dan shared coffee nearly every morning, and after that Zack did most of his songwriting on the front porch. His father had hired a foreman to help run the horse farm, which was back in business and doing better than it had in years.

  Every now and then Grandpa Dan asked Zack the question he dreaded most. “What do you hear from Reese?”

  The answer was always the same. “Nothing, Grandpa.”

  “Keep believing. She’ll come home someday.”

  The conversation was part of their routine, but it made Zack sad. Believing Reese might be part of his life again was more difficult all the time. Clearly she had moved on. Whether he ever heard what happened to her, whether she’d fallen in love with someone in Europe, her silence spoke louder than anything she might’ve said. She wasn’t interested. Period.

  Zack missed her still. Especially when he took AJ to the Lowell Center for her riding lessons. They’d hired someone to replace Reese, a guy with a decade of experience. AJ loved him, but even she brought up Reese once in a while. “She said she’d come back.” AJ remembered details like that.

  Always he tried to explain. “Sometimes people change their minds.”

  “Sometimes.” AJ didn’t stay sad long. She loved being around Zack, and she loved that he was leading worship for the youth group at church again. Now that she was healthier, his sister was in the front row every week.

  Zack didn’t take a single day for granted.

  He headed into the store and found a bag of broccoli and a few pounds of apples and bananas. He was trying to remember what else his mother needed when it happened.

  He spotted her halfway down the canned-food aisle.

  She had her back to him, but he would know her pretty dark hair, her graceful walk anywhere. For a moment he stopped, not sure if maybe he was dreaming. Could it really be? Was this happening? She was reaching the end of the aisle when he jolted into action. He couldn’t miss this moment. Not after a year had gone by.

  “Reese!” He left his cart and jogged toward her. “Reese, wait!”

  She hesitated before turning around. As she did, their eyes met and Zack froze. It was her . . . it really was. She had returned home and she was here at Kroger. As if no time had passed. As if she hadn’t spent the last twelve months in London. “You . . . you’re back.” He walked slowly toward her.

  As he did, he saw something that gave him the slightest bit of hope. Her eyes looked damp. “Zack.”

  “I . . . I can’t believe you’re here.” He went to her and slowly took her in his arms. The hug didn’t last long enough, but the feeling brought back yesterday. Maybe for both of them. He allowed distance between them again and searched her eyes. She looked different, more beautiful, if that were possible. The walls that had been there a year ago were gone now. And an alluring confidence shone from her soul. Zack wondered if he could even breathe, standing this close.

  She spoke first. “You look good. I hear your song everywhere.”

  He hesitated, not breaking eye contact. “It’s your song.”

  She smiled. “Keith Urban’s song, right?”

  “No.” He shook his head. He co
uld feel a smile starting in his eyes. “It’ll always be yours, Reese. I wrote it for you.”

  “Well . . . I think of you when I hear it.” She looked at the time on her phone. “I’m sorry. I have to be somewhere.”

  Panic coursed through his veins. She couldn’t leave him again, not this soon. “When . . . when did you get back?”

  “A few weeks ago.” She angled her head. “London was wonderful. I might move there for good.” She shrugged one shoulder. Everything about her looked irresistible. “I’m still praying about it.”

  He wanted to shout that she could never move there. Not forever. Not when he still loved her. He had so much to tell her, so much to know about her time away. But she needed to leave. So he did the only thing he could. “I have the same number.”

  “Me, too.” Her eyes looked to the places in his heart that would never forget her. “We should get coffee.”

  “Yes.” Zack felt dizzy with the first real possibility he’d felt since he left for Atlanta more than a year ago. “I’ll call you.” He took a step back toward his cart. “Tomorrow?”

  She laughed. “Okay. Tomorrow.” Her smile faded. “Good seeing you, Zack.”

  “You, too.” He watched her go and tried to remember to breathe. She was home and she was here and maybe tomorrow she would get coffee with him.

  His heart soared ahead of him down the aisles of the store. The chance meeting here at Kroger was a start. The miracle he’d been praying for.

  He could hardly wait to tell Grandpa Dan.

  HIS TRUCK WAS filled with groceries, but Zack wasn’t ready to go home. He couldn’t stop thinking about Reese. The look in her eyes, the way he could see all the way to her heart. Just like before.