The Child's Secret

by Amanda Brooke

  Anna appeared from the caravan with two mugs. After walking down the steps, she struggled to find a path through the clumps of mud and occasional boulders in her flimsy sandals and was forced to give up.

  She waited for Sam to reach her. ‘You could have had something stronger if you had put me on your insurance,’ she said as she handed him his tea. ‘I wouldn’t have minded driving you home.’

  Sam glanced over his shoulder. ‘I think I need to keep my wits about me. If I’d known how much work was involved I would never have offered.’

  ‘You didn’t offer,’ Anna reminded him. Her body became as tense as her words when she added, ‘Everyone just assumes you have nothing better to do.’

  He took a breath and was about to say he didn’t have anything better to do, but guessed Anna wouldn’t see it that way. ‘It is a lovely place though, isn’t it?’

  Anna relaxed into the smile growing on her face. ‘Yes, it is. Pat says you can walk to Loggerheads from here. I’ve been there on school trips more times than I care to count, both as a kid and a teacher. There are some lovely walks, and if the weather’s right the view is stunning from Moel Famau – plenty of inspiration for an artist like you.’ When she scanned Sam’s face, there was the merest reflection of her enthusiasm but it was definitely there. ‘I know there’s a lot to do, Sam, but Pat’s told me that if you wanted to spend a week or two here to get the job done then the place is yours. And you wouldn’t have to do it all on your own.’

  Sam dug his heels into the baked earth as he considered his options.

  ‘I know you were ready to run to the hills when I suggested going on holiday together,’ she continued, ‘but this is different.’

  Intent on looking at the dust he was kicking up with his feet, Sam refused to meet Anna’s gaze. He too was thinking that he wouldn’t have to do the job on his own, if not quite in the way Anna imagined.

  ‘The caravan looks pretty big,’ he mused, still not sure how far Jasmine’s belief in the Wishing Tree would take him.

  ‘There are three bedrooms in all, two doubles and a smaller one with bunk beds, and it has all the mod cons. Pat says there’s a club on site and a laundry too,’ Anna said before catching a glint in his eye. ‘Why? What are you thinking, Sam McIntyre?’

  ‘I was thinking I’d like a tour of the caravan. After that we can take Pat to the pub for lunch and talk over the options,’ he said but would say no more until his head had caught up with what his heart was telling him to do.

  It had taken the combined efforts of both Anna and Pat to extract the plans that were forming in Sam’s mind. Anna repeated her offer of help but even she had to admit that while she was ready and willing to get stuck into hard work, she didn’t have Sam’s physical strength or stamina. Suggesting that they invite Finn and his family along wasn’t an obvious option, but one that Sam justified by stating Finn’s knowledge and experience in the building trade, and all without revealing his real motives which were, of course, to give the Petersons the holiday Jasmine dreamed of.

  Anna was reluctant, to say the least, but she was forced to concede after considering Sam’s other alternatives, which included commandeering a couple of the lads from work with the promise of turning it into a ‘boys’ only’ break. Sam actually made a good show of wanting to ask the lads from work first, so it was no surprise that, when he turned up at the King’s Arms a few days later to lure Finn into a trap, it was with Anna’s full support. It was six o’clock and she was due to meet him at seven, by which point Sam was banking on Finn having made an appearance.

  ‘That looks interesting.’

  Sam tried to look surprised as he looked up from the collection of plans he had laid out across the table. ‘Hi, Finn. How’s it going?’

  Finn put down his almost empty pint of lager that was still cold enough to leave beads of condensation around the glass, then showed Sam the palms of his hands. ‘Look at these segs,’ he said with a note of pride. ‘If that isn’t a sign of hard graft then I don’t know what is.’

  It wasn’t exactly the opening statement Sam had been hoping for. Tempting Finn to spend precious holiday leave doing hard labour, which would only add more blisters to his war wounds, might not be as easy as he had hoped.

  ‘I spoke to Jack the other day and he says you’re doing a brilliant job.’

  Finn took a seat opposite. ‘Yeah, but all good things come to an end. I can’t help thinking that the harder I work, the quicker the job’ll be finished and I’ll be back on the dole. He didn’t mention anything about keeping me on when this housing phase is complete, did he?’

  Jack had mentioned it and the news wasn’t promising. The current landscaping project would be completed by the end of September and Jack didn’t think he’d be taking on any extra labour again until the following spring. ‘Sorry, Finn, he didn’t. But don’t let that put you off. Even if your current contract does come to an end, I’m sure he’ll keep you in mind for future projects.’

  Finn drained his glass. ‘My thoughts exactly. So, what’s this, then?’ he asked, returning his attention to the papers that had piqued his curiosity.

  ‘A rod for my own back, that’s what,’ Sam muttered. He shook his head. ‘I get on really well with my landlady and her friends. They’re a bunch of sweet old ladies who can wrap me round their little fingers, although this latest job is beyond me.’ For effect, he rubbed his temples as if he didn’t know what to do next. ‘Pat, who’s the youngster of the bunch at a mere seventy-five, has a caravan in North Wales, the one we said we were going to see. It’s on a lovely site in the middle of some stunning countryside and the caravan owners all take very particular care of their gardens. I think Pat is trying to outdo her neighbours, so she asked me to do a bit of landscaping, but I’m telling you, Finn, it’s going to take a fair bit of work to transform her plot of land into anything like the garden she has her heart set on.’

  Before continuing, Sam pushed his papers wider across the table so Finn could see them more clearly. ‘She wants a patio in front of the caravan with a path that leads down to the lower-level section which will be a bit of an adventure playground for her grandkids, complete with rope swing.’

  ‘And these are the plans?’ Finn asked picking up one of the scraps of paper Pat had given Sam.

  ‘Those are the drawings Pat drew up and I’m in the process of translating them into something that will work. Oh, and this is the state the garden’s in at the moment,’ he said, picking up his phone which conveniently had a selection of photographs at the ready.

  Sam waited for Finn to skim through the slideshow and watched the look of horror growing on his face. ‘Rather you than me, mate,’ he said eventually, which was another response that Sam didn’t need.

  ‘I’ve been working on a proper plan,’ Sam said, trying to sound more confident than he felt so he didn’t frighten Finn off completely. He pushed the sketch he had just been working on towards Finn. ‘If I can lower Pat’s expectations and, as long as her family come through on their part of the deal and prepare the site, I think I could do this in a week.’

  ‘You think?’

  ‘I’d like to try. Anna thinks Pat is taking advantage of my good nature but I honestly don’t mind. She’s a lovely lady and she’s not the type to sit back expecting people to run around after her. She’d be out there digging up the garden herself if she could. Actually, I think she will end up having a go if I don’t get there first. And even Anna has to agree that the offer of staying there for a week is enough of an incentive to give it a go.’

  ‘Anna’s going with you?’

  ‘Yeah, she wants to help and, like I said, it’s a fantastic site. Loggerheads is close by and we’re planning on going out and about trekking when we’re not knee deep in mud.’

  ‘So just you and Anna?’ Finn asked. When Sam nodded, he couldn’t help but laugh. ‘The two of you are mad.’

  Sam frowned as he considered the idea he would have Finn believe had just occurred to him. �
�I suppose I could try and enlist more help. The caravan’s an eight-berth and it’s fully kitted out. Here, look.’ He passed his phone back to Finn to show him a set of photos that showed off the caravan to its best advantage.

  ‘When?’

  ‘In two weeks,’ Sam said and then held his breath.

  Finn finished off his pint and then wiped his mouth as if to hold back the offer he was about to make. ‘The site I’m on is on closedown around then so I suppose I could lend a hand.’

  Sam already knew when Finn was free and had scheduled the work around him. He had even rehearsed the wince that would give Finn the impression he couldn’t possibly let him give up his holidays. ‘I couldn’t pay you, or at least nothing more than food and lodgings and a slap-up meal at the Crown – which is top-notch, by the way.’

  ‘Can I bring the family?’

  ‘Don’t see why not, there’s plenty of room.’

  ‘I’ve been promising Jasmine I’d take her on holiday but we can’t really afford it while Laura is making us put every spare penny away for a rainy day.’

  ‘Apparently Pat’s grandkids all love it so I imagine Jasmine will too. Does that mean you’re up for it?’

  Finn was shaking his head as he pushed his empty glass across the table. ‘Buy me a pint and we’ve got a deal.’

  ‘Deal,’ Sam said, shaking Finn’s hand and picking up the glass although he waited until he was standing at the bar with his back to Finn before he let the smile spread across his face.

  17

  Sunday 9 August 2015

  The weekend before they were due to leave, Selina invited Sam for Sunday dinner, and not only Sam, this time. With her inimitable timing, his wily landlady had caught him on his way out with Anna the previous night and had extended the invitation to both of them – Anna accepting before Sam could even draw breath.

  ‘He’s been in a world of his own this last week,’ Anna complained. ‘I might as well be talking to myself half the time. When I ask him a question, it’s obvious he hasn’t got a clue what I’ve just said.’

  Sam scowled at her. ‘Classic teacher’s trick.’

  ‘Ah, you were listening this time, then?’

  Selina tutted as she placed a mountain of perfectly crisp roast potatoes, buttery chicken and al dente vegetables in front of Sam. ‘Men,’ she said with a shake of the head before serving up what were slightly smaller portions of her signature dish for Anna and herself. ‘Now eat up. You need to build your strength up for next week.’

  After the obligatory praise for her cooking, Anna asked, ‘Were you married long, Selina?’

  ‘Ten years.’

  ‘Sam says you lost your husband at a young age. I’m really sorry. It must have been awful for you.’

  ‘Yes, it was. And it’s not a time in my life I like to revisit.’

  Sam heard the pain in her voice and knew well enough that while Selina could never escape it, she would do her best to ignore the hurt. She had become adept at pretending her grief had been left behind in the past and she wasn’t about to resurrect it. ‘Have you heard from Pat this week?’ he asked, in a chivalrous attempt to bring the current topic of conversation to a swift conclusion. ‘I tried phoning her to ask how the work’s going but there was no answer.’

  ‘She’s at the site now.’

  ‘Ah, that explains it then,’ Anna said. ‘We couldn’t get a mobile reception when we were up there.’

  ‘I don’t have time for those new-fangled contraptions myself,’ Selina said.

  ‘I don’t blame you. They can be more trouble than they’re worth,’ Sam said, thinking how many texts and calls he had been getting lately.

  Oblivious that the comment had been directed at her, Anna said, ‘Well, at least when we’re away, no one will be able to bother us. No distractions. No favours to call in.’

  ‘We have to get there first,’ Sam warned. ‘I’ve already told Pat that there’s no point in going on Saturday unless the ground has been prepared and all the supplies delivered.’

  ‘Oh, don’t worry,’ Selina told him. ‘Pat’s family have been working at full pelt to get everything ready and she wouldn’t let them get away with anything less than her exacting standards.’

  ‘I hope she isn’t expecting too much from me,’ Sam warned. ‘I’ll do my best but I’m no miracle worker. I’m just glad Finn’s going to be there to help.’

  ‘And let’s not forget the girl power,’ Anna added. ‘I bumped into Laura the other day and she’s really looking forward to it. She says Jasmine is beside herself, even if she does have to share her holiday with her teacher. None of us are afraid of getting our hands dirty, and if the extra effort means we can have a few days off, it’ll be worth it.’

  ‘A few?’ Sam asked. ‘I think we’ll be lucky to get one.’

  ‘Don’t underestimate this girl power,’ Selina said. ‘I never did agree with women being chained to the kitchen sink and I’m glad to see the younger generation aren’t settling for it either.’

  ‘Ach, wait until Anna chips a fingernail,’ Sam said, laughing when both women cast him the cutting looks he had been expecting.

  After facing down the backlash, Sam went on to describe all the plans he had made and how Finn had helped him work out the exact quantities of all the building materials they would need. Pat had asked Sam to do the job with good reason. Planning a garden was second nature to him and, after the initial shock, he had been able to see past the quagmire and was ready to bring the land to life. He loved establishing a new garden, selecting the right mix of evergreens and perennials, spring flowers and late bloomers. He had settled on a mixture of plants for their stunning colours and exotic fragrances as well as the more hardy plants and self-seeders that would give Pat and her family pleasure for years to come.

  ‘I hope she’ll invite us back there next year when everything’s established. Do you think she will?’ Anna asked.

  Selina was at the stove attending to the sticky toffee pudding she had made for them. She glanced over her shoulder and, looking at Sam rather than the person who had posed the question, she said, ‘I don’t think Pat would mind at all.’

  ‘Let’s not count our chickens,’ Sam warned. ‘We haven’t even started yet.’

  ‘I hope you know what you’re letting yourself in for,’ Selina mused.

  Sam said nothing and the conversation moved on as they devoured their dessert. It was only later, when Anna excused herself to go to the bathroom, that Selina framed her comment as a direct question. ‘Do you know what you’re letting yourself in for, Sam?’

  ‘Hard work never hurt anyone.’

  In no mood for Sam’s evasion, Selina said, ‘After years of being a recluse, you’re going to spend a week in a relatively confined space with a lot of people.’

  ‘I need to come out of my shell. Isn’t that what you’ve been telling me?’

  ‘You didn’t want to get involved with Anna and now you’re not only going on holiday with her, but Jasmine and her family too – the idea of something like that would have filled you with horror not that long ago.’

  ‘It still does, Selina, but I thought you of all people would approve.’

  ‘Don’t get me wrong, Sam, I’m happy that you’re not sitting upstairs alone folding bits of paper and pretending the rest of the world doesn’t exist.’

  Sam looked down at the paper napkin in his hand. Expert fingers that had a mind of their own were making an inverse fold to give the crane a head and neck. ‘I wasn’t that bad.’

  ‘No, you were worse.’ Selina narrowed her eyes as if she were weighing up what she should and shouldn’t say, but at that moment her actions were to speak louder than words. She stood up and went over to a kitchen drawer where she pulled out an envelope made from luxurious cream paper. It had an embossed rose on the back.

  Sam’s eyes widened. ‘She sent you one too?’

  ‘Of course. You don’t think Kirsten was relying on you to extend the wedding invitation to me, do
you? She’s presuming I’m your plus one, given she has no idea about you and Anna.’ Realizing she had rendered Sam speechless, she continued. ‘She would like you to be there, and if you don’t want to take Anna, I don’t mind being there to give you some moral support.’

  Rather than open his mouth, Sam pursed his lips. He had received the invitation to his ex-wife’s wedding weeks ago but still hadn’t opened it. The cursive handwriting, along with the fancy envelope, had told him all he needed to know and, when he had shoved it into a drawer, he had pushed the news to the back of his mind too, locked away along with all the memories and emotions he would be forced to confront if ever he returned to his hometown. ‘No, Selina. We’ve both moved on,’ he said at last.

  ‘What’s this?’ Anna asked, appearing suddenly while Selina and Sam had been giving the cream envelope their full attention.

  Selina fumbled briefly as she returned the invitation to the drawer. ‘Oh, nothing,’ she said, as if the secret were hers and Anna shouldn’t ask.

  Sam knew Anna better. She might let the matter go unchallenged now but she would only ask him later and she would keep on asking until he gave in. ‘It’s an invite to my ex-wife’s wedding.’

  ‘Oh,’ Anna said, and was momentarily confused. ‘I didn’t realize you and she were friends, Selina.’ She looked from one guilty expression to the other, settling her gaze on Sam’s face. ‘You had one too?’

  ‘I’m happy for Kirsten, but I won’t be going. I don’t want to go back, Anna,’ he said and hoped he sounded sincere enough to ease his girlfriend’s insecurities.

  ‘Oh,’ she said again.

  For someone who had claimed to have doubled in size since being force fed Selina’s roast dinner, Anna looked small and fragile. Sam stood up and slipped an arm around her waist but when he spoke, it was to Selina. ‘Could you reply on behalf of the both of us? Wish Kirsten and Rob all the best for the future but tell her I’m otherwise engaged.’

  ‘If that’s what you want,’ Selina said.

  ‘Yes,’ Sam said, and pulled Anna a fraction closer. ‘Yes, it is.’