“That’s not the point. He has a family here and I would’ve done what I could to spend time with him. To acknowledge him, even if I couldn’t watch him grow. But that’s all going to change starting right this second. I’m going to be a major part of his life now. He’s going to know I’m his father.”
“No, Justin.” Kat’s green eyes sharpened. “You can’t do that to Mattie. It’ll kill her. If you take that baby away from her, she’ll die. I swear to you, she’ll go into cardiac arrest.”
Justin took a step back, noting the warning in her voice. Was she serious or overstating the facts?
“You have no idea,” she continued. “When I got here two months ago, she’d just been released from the hospital. She’d had a major heart attack after she learned of Brett’s death. She had no reason to live. She’d lost fifteen pounds, and as you can see, she’s a small woman to begin with, and she didn’t want any part of rehab. She was living in the house alone. I saw the hopelessness in her eyes, Justin. It reminded me, of...well, of my own mother. When I told her my story, about how I met Brett and conceived his child, she...she made a remarkable comeback. In just the few months I’ve been here, she’s put on weight and her whole outlook has changed. Her heart is still damaged and she has to take it easy, but the doctor has told her over and over that our little Connor is her antidote to heart disease. You have to believe me. You cannot tell that woman that Connor isn’t Brett’s son.”
“That’s hardly fair, Kat. I’ve already missed out on so much with Connor. And it’s not fair to the boy to deprive him of his real father.”
“Do you want to be responsible for putting Aunt Mattie back in the hospital...or worse?”
Damn it. His gut told him Kat was telling the truth. The blow was hard to take. He didn’t want to deny his son a father a second longer. But he’d seen Matilda Applegate with his own eyes. She was frail and weakened. She certainly looked older than her seventy years in body, but when her gaze lit on Connor, it had a youthful spirited glow. He hated to admit it but that woman’s life revolved around that little boy.
Every day of Justin’s life, Brett’s death gnawed at him. He’d vowed that once he returned home, he’d come clean and speak with Brett’s aunt. Telling Mattie the truth about Brett’s death would go a long way in clearing his conscience. It had taken Justin three days to build up the courage to visit the woman and he’d been prepared to lay it all on the line. But now, as he studied Kat’s determined expression, the set of her delicate jaw and the plea in her eyes, he was boxed into a corner. “I don’t want to hurt Mattie Applegate.”
“Then...don’t.”
“I want to know my son.”
“You will. I promise.” Her voice held conviction.
Justin stared at her. A promise from Katherine Grady? Could he trust her? The fool in him, who saw her as a beautiful, sexy, desirable woman, wanted so badly to believe her, but he couldn’t chance it. The stakes were just too high. He had every right to know his son, to learn Connor tricks and comfort him when he was tired and grumpy. He wanted to bond with him and give him fatherly love.
Justin stepped closer to her. She smelled like gardenias, fresh and fragrant and distinct. Her light springtime scent contrasted sharply with the time of year, the chill in the air. “What are you suggesting?”
Kat’s lashes fell to her cheeks, blond curls bouncing as she shook her head. “I don’t know, Justin. We’ll have to work it out secretly. I do know I won’t stop you from seeing Connor. I’ll make every effort to make it easy for you to be with him, as long as you don’t tell Aunt Mattie the truth. Please.”
Whether Matilda Applegate would truly die of a coronary or not upon learning the truth, no one would ever know, but Kat sure believed it as fact. And that’s all he could go on right now. He couldn’t chance it, but he damn well didn’t have to like it.
He’d had a plan in mind for Mattie Applegate from the start, to honor Brett and his late uncle Ralph, who had also been a war veteran. He wanted to help the Applegate family. Maybe now was the time to implement that plan.
He didn’t want to deny his son’s birth but what choice did he have? “All right. I won’t tell her.”
Gratitude filled her eyes as a broad smile graced her face. “Thank you, Justin. Thank you.”
Swallowing hard, Justin couldn’t look away. Her glowing appreciation and gleam in her pretty green eyes was a little too hard to take. He wondered if his good sense had taken a joy ride. Was he remembering too much about the leave he’d spent with Kat, or had he just been without a woman for too long?
He gathered the lapels of the bomber jacket in both hands and gently drew her onto her feet and close to him.
“Oh.”
He focused on her tempting pouty mouth. She didn’t pull away and that was good enough for him. He reached behind her neck and tugged her mouth to his.
“What are you doing?” she whispered over the seam of his lips.
He brushed his mouth over hers, once, twice. Testing and tasting her.
From down deep in her throat, she purred.
What the hell was he doing? It was already too complicated between them, but that didn’t stop him from delving deep into her mouth with strokes of his tongue. From bracing his hands inside the jacket and absorbing the heat of her skin burning through her clothes.
He held her hips, nestled her closer yet, and drew out sweet nectar from her inviting mouth. From the first touch of their lips, everything had come back to him. During those cold lonely nights overseas, how often he’d think of the time he’d spent with her like this. Holding her, tasting her and making love to her. She hadn’t been the only woman he’d been with during his time in the military, but she’d definitely been the most memorable.
From under the warmth of the jacket, he lifted her blouse and splayed his fingers across her belly. His fingertips touched where she’d carried his baby. Her skin now was firm and flat and silky smooth.
A whimper rose from her throat and she leaned into him. She smelled like heaven. Strands of silky hair fell across his cheek. From his gut, a low moan climbed up his throat as he slid his hand to the warm flesh around her waist. Raw, powerful desire zipped through his body.
Flashing lights from an oncoming car brightened the square for a second and touched on where they stood in the gazebo. Kat startled and backed away, her hand going to her mouth and her eyes lifting to his. In them, he saw longing, surprise and condemnation all at once.
Her lipstick was smeared, her hair ruffled, but none of that mattered on Kat. She was gorgeous no matter what. Drop-dead gorgeous. She wrapped the jacket tight around her torso and hugged herself as if summoning courage to say something. Then, her eyes flickered and she blurted, “I dated your brother a couple of times.”
Justin snapped to attention. “What?”
“I thought it’d be better if you found out from me. Luke and I...”
“What about you and Luke?”
“It was nothing.... I was lonely and worried sick about Mattie. We saw each other briefly. You might as well know now, I’ve met your whole family.”
A shudder wracked his body. Justin couldn’t tear his gaze away from the woman who’d just dropped a bombshell on him. Kat and Luke? Her confession ripped right through him. His pride suffered and he gnashed his teeth at the thought of Kat with his brother. What other bombs would she drop on him? It served to remind him that he didn’t really know Kat Grady at all.
“Do you want to know about what happened between—?”
“I’ll get my information from Luke. But I do want something else from you.”
She blinked then, her lips trembling. “What would that be?”
“A paternity test.”
* * *
Justin followed her home and waited until she was safely in the house before revving the engine and
speeding off. Kat sighed quietly. She wasn’t thrilled about Justin doubting her word about the baby’s parenthood and demanding a paternity test, but if it was necessary to ease his mind in order to keep the secret a little while longer, she had to agree for Mattie’s sake.
Kat moved through the house she thought of as home, realizing that all this could come crashing down around her. She’d made some boner mistakes in her day, but protecting Mattie Applegate from the truth wasn’t one of them. She felt it deep down in her core, that she was doing the right thing by keeping the truth from her.
She peeked in on Connor first, and the gentle beam of love she carried inside brightened when she looked at him cozy and warm in his crib. There weren’t any words strong enough to explain the unconditional love she had for her son. There were no borders, no boundaries or limits in her adoration. She’d only wished she hadn’t tried so hard to make it work with Michael Golden in New York. He was all wrong for Connor. She realized that now and she chalked up her bad decision to survival.
Next, she moved to Mattie’s room and tiptoed two steps inside to peer at the patchwork quilt nestled around Mattie’s slender shoulders.
“I’m still breathing,” the older woman said.
Kat laughed softly. “I would hope so.”
“Keeping awake, just in case Connor needs me.”
“He’s sound asleep, Aunt Mattie.”
“That’s good, sweetheart. Not a peep out of him tonight.”
“You can go to sleep now,” Kat said, backing out of the room.
“I think I will.”
“Good night, Aunt Mattie,” Kat said from the doorway. “Thank you.”
“Good night, sweetheart.”
The glow inside Kat’s heart got a shade brighter with Mattie’s affection. Kat may be saving her life, but Matilda Applegate might just be saving hers, too.
Kat walked quietly into the spare bedroom Mattie had used to store all of Ralph’s clothing and fishing gear. He’d been gone for years, but Mattie said she liked to have his things surrounding her to keep him close. Kat thought it sweet and romantic. She’d never had that kind of relationship with anyone. But she had Connor now and he was enough.
Mattie had cleared out half of the closet and four dresser drawers for Kat’s business. Kat had found an old pine desk in the barn, then sanded and lathered it with walnut stain to make it useful for her purposes. Now it housed a printer and her laptop computer. Fishing rods held up one corner of the room and tackle boxes were stacked up three high in another, with Aunt Mattie’s sewing machine in between. Luckily it wasn’t a relic and Kat had been able to update some parts to make it run more efficiently. Kat saw it as her salvation, a way to put her talent to good use.
She sat down at the machine and picked up the dress pattern she’d designed last month. Then she started poking pins into the yellow dotted Swiss material of the garment she’d started working on early this morning, before Justin Slade had turned her world upside down.
Her lips tasted of him and his rugged musky scent filled her nostrils still. A steady low hum like a gentle spring breeze whispered through her body, invading her good sense. She could easily fall into those sensations again. Pitiful female that she was, she missed the strength of a man’s arms around her and a strong shoulder to rely on when the strife of the day got to be too much. So sue her for responding to that kiss, for letting herself fall prey to Justin Slade’s advances tonight.
She may have been guilty of some things, but he’d lied to her in the first place, causing this whole mess. Justin Slade was no saint.
Except that he was. He’d received the Medal of Honor for saving five soldiers’ lives. She’d looked him up on the internet after he left this morning. She faintly recalled Luke mentioning once that his brother was a decorated soldier. At the time, she hadn’t made any connection, but then, why would she? She’d had no idea Luke was related to her son’s father. The paternity test, a mere swabbing of the baby’s and father’s mouths, would prove Justin’s paternity, she had no doubt.
She fed material into the Singer and guided the fabric through. Her shoulders relaxed with each perfect stitch, her heart warming with the steady automatic buzzing of the machine. Kat let nimble fingers work their magic on cloth that would soon become a sunny Easter dress for one lucky little girl. With her prototype designs shipped to fashion houses and orders coming in now from local towns, Kat ran her small-time business, Babylicious, from Mattie Applegate’s spare bedroom. But for right now, tonight, sewing this dress, losing herself in work she loved, helped bank her rising fear that somehow Justin Slade could make life extremely difficult for her.
* * *
Justin thought his time hiding behind corners and being suspicious of everything around him was over. He was wrong. Keeping a paternity test under wraps in Douglas County wasn’t possible. He couldn’t trust anyone within earshot of his doctor’s office to keep a secret this big. Not now, when every acquaintance he’d ever known was stopping him on the street to shake his hand and friends he hadn’t seen since high school were coming to pay him a visit on the ranch.
Justin had called in a favor from a family friend, a doctor who’d gotten a pretty sweet deal on a thoroughbred stallion from the Slade horse farm. Dr. Barrington practiced two towns over in another county, and promised discretion.
The next morning, he arranged to meet Kat in a mini-mall parking lot in Silver Springs. Then, with Connor strapped into the car seat, he drove Kat’s car to Dr. Barrington’s office for the appointment. It actually took longer to boil water than to give the test, and afterward Justin wasted no time driving them back to where he’d parked his truck.
The boy had fallen asleep, his little head propped against one side of the car seat, his hair damp with sleep sweat, breathing quietly. Justin’s heart lurched. He’d experienced anger and regret and bitterness from this situation, but right now, all he felt was a magnetic pull to the child he might have fathered. Already, he was thinking of the future and of all the things he wanted to teach his son.
“That didn’t take long,” Kat said with quiet relief.
“Connor didn’t seem to mind.” Justin already felt protective about the boy. He was glad the swab test was just as accurate as a blood test. No needles. DNA was DNA, no matter how they acquired it, Dr. Barrington had assured them.
“It was painless, thank goodness,” Kat said, glancing in the rearview mirror to check on Connor as they drove on.
Justin’s chest filled with pride. “He seems like a good baby.”
Kat’s smile was bright as sunshine. “He has his moments. I suppose all babies do, but he’s wonderful. He loves to laugh. We play giggle games. And he loves to eat. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him refuse food.” The look in her eyes when she spoke of Connor was something to see.
They stared at each other for several seconds.
Justin wanted to spend the day together, to take them to lunch and watch Connor eat his meal. To walk the baby around town in his stroller, just like a real family, and to do all the things he’d missed out on. But Justin stood to lose too much in the off chance the paternity test came back negative.
He’d learned patience in the marines. Wait for the right moment. And this wasn’t it.
Justin just couldn’t trust Kat. She was aware of the Slade wealth. She knew Justin’s background. She’d seen Sunset Ranch and had already tried to get her foot in the door by dating Luke. Was passing her son off as a Slade just another ploy? When he returned home from war, he thought he’d never experience the type of suspicion that crept up his spine now. But how could he believe anything she had to say?
Waiting for the paternity test and finding out whether that little cherub-faced boy with the inky curls and big dark eyes was truly his son would make for the longest three days of his life.
He wanted Connor to be his for th
e boy’s sake, so he wouldn’t go through life fatherless.
But if the baby was his son, the peace and solitude he’d craved since Brett’s death wouldn’t come. The situation with Aunt Mattie would complicate matters.
Justin drove into the parking lot in the minimall and parked Kat’s car next to his. With his hands draped on the steering wheel, he turned to her. She glanced at her wristwatch and sighed. “I’d better get going. When he wakes up, he’ll want to eat. He howls when he’s hungry.”
“That I’d like to see.”
“You will,” she said softly, assuring him. “He’s yours, Justin. But you’ll have your proof in a few days.”
Justin got out of the car and waited until Kat drove away before he climbed into his truck. Then he pulled out of the parking lot, and headed toward Silver Haven Cemetery where Brett’s body had been laid to rest. After driving for twenty minutes, he passed through a four-way stop and slowed his truck when the stately iron gates of the cemetery came into view. They were opened wide like welcoming arms to the mourners who were there to pay their respects. He stared at the ivy-covered brick columns at the entrance as his heart pumped hard inside his chest.
Turn the wheel. Go in. Make your peace.
His hands were frozen in the ten and two position on the steering wheel as he sat in his truck, numbly staring at those gates. Closing his eyes, he said a silent prayer for Brett. But a car approaching from behind helped him make his decision. He touched his foot to the gas pedal and the truck limped along the road as Silver Haven vanished in his rearview mirror.
He’d lost his nerve. He wasn’t ready to travel through those gates. He didn’t know when he’d ever be ready. With trepidation in his heart, he changed direction and made the necessary turns that would lead him home, to Sunset Ranch.
He’d tried.
It would have to be enough for now.
The Secret Heir of Sunset Ranch Page 5