It was late in the afternoon by the time Justin parked in front of his house. He sat there for a long while, studying the dashboard with eyes that only saw the past: things he couldn’t change and mistakes he’d made along the way.
Rap. Rap. Rap.
Justin jerked to attention, brought out of his deep thoughts. When he was an on-duty marine, daydreaming like that could get a man killed.
Luke’s voice penetrated the front window of the truck. “You having a party in there all by yourself?”
Justin rolled his eyes. “Yeah, and you just crashed it.”
“Didn’t anyone tell you a party has to involve at least two people and one of them should be female?”
Despite his teasing grin, Luke’s eyes shone with understanding. Luke was the sensitive type, under all that blond brawn and bulk. He was Justin’s go-to man when he had a problem. Except that now Luke could conceivably be the problem.
As Luke stepped back, Justin exited the truck. “We need to talk.”
“Sounds serious.” Luke lost the grin.
Justin squinted against sunlight, gazing across acres of Slade land. “You have time for a ride?”
Luke gave him a nod. “If it’s important, I’ll make time.”
Justin squared him a look. “It’s important.”
Luke tipped his hat brim farther down on his forehead and spoke with a Clint Eastwood rasp. “Okay, then, let’s saddle up and leave this ole ranch in the dust.”
Justin appreciated Luke’s attempt to lighten the moment, but not even an exaggerated cowboy drawl was going to make him smile until he found out the truth about Kat and his brother.
Four
“It’s nice of you to visit again so soon, Justin,” Mattie said, sitting across from him on the recliner in her parlor. “Are you sure you don’t want any peach pie?”
“Not right now, ma’am.” He was seated in the same spot on the sofa as the other day. “I’ll have some later.”
“Pie will keep. Just about everything keeps when you get to be my age.”
Justin smiled. Aunt Mattie wore a housecoat with bright red, turquoise and orange flowers. Her hair was up in a do—straight back, then curling at the nape—that reminded him of his mother. He could almost see through Aunt Mattie’s years to the attractive, flamboyant young girl she must have been once. “My grandma used to say age is just a number in your head. It’s how you feel inside that matters.”
She leaned forward in her seat and the smile she gave him took two decades off her face. “Well, then if that’s true, I’m sixteen.”
Justin nodded. “That’s what my grandma used to say, too.”
“’Course when your body breaks down, you tend to forget that.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“So, you came to tell me about Brett. How nice. Did you know him very well?”
“Yes, ma’am, I did. He enlisted a few years after I did. He was deployed to my unit at Delaram about two years ago. We served together and got on as friends.”
Matilda leaned back in the chair and a distant, almost tragic smile spread across her thin cheeks. “He was like a son to me. Ralph and I raised him, you know. Now, my Ralph and Brett are serving the Lord up above. Tell me about your time with Brett.”
Justin launched into story after story about his friendship with Brett. He told her about the barracks, how they lived in close quarters, the blazing heat and the frigid cold, and about how much friendship came to mean to the soldiers serving over there. They had little contact with the outside world—no television, no internet access most of the time. Justin told her about the poker games they’d play and how they would swap rations and break out pictures and talk about home. Always home. It got to be that they knew each other’s home lives just as well as they knew their own. He told Aunt Mattie how much Brett talked about his uncle Ralph and about how much he’d loved her. He told her how Brett felt bad, leaving her alone, but hoped to come home one day to build Applegate Farms back to its original glory. Brett had every intention of doing that very thing.
He told her how Brett was as fine a soldier as there was.
He told her everything there was to tell, except the one thing that she needed to hear the most. How Brett died. The words were on his lips, begging to come forth, but they failed, time and again, either because Justin had just made her smile, or she’d gotten a faraway nostalgic look on her face, or she’d gather her hands to her chest as if holding his words near to her heart with such hope that it tore Justin up inside.
He’d come ready to purge his guilt and lay down the heavy burden he’d been carrying around for months. His memories haunted him. His dreams had turned nightmarish. He thought that today he could finally own up to his part in Brett’s death, knowing that Aunt Mattie deserved the truth, and then he’d be able to deal with all the rest.
But he couldn’t do it.
The time was never right. He didn’t want to blurt out something that would hurt the older woman. A battle raged in his head, and he was glad that Kat and Connor were out this morning shopping in town. Glad that he’d had this time to speak with Mattie alone.
At first, when Mattie had answered the door to his knock, he’d been disappointed. He’d wanted to see Connor. He’d gotten his expectations up and had been anxious to see the child again, anxious to look upon his chubby cheeks and glimpse the spark of intelligence in his eyes.
He’d wanted to see Kat, too.
She hadn’t lied to him about Luke. They’d dated briefly and had shared nothing more than a kiss or two. Luke had sworn on his unborn baby’s life that nothing had happened between him and Kat other than friendship, and that was more than good enough for Justin to hear. His relief was as powerful as anything he’d ever experienced.
Luke had been stunned when Justin then told him the entire story of his involvement with Kat. It wasn’t the kind of thing that happened every day. Mostly, Justin hated admitting to his brother about making and following through on such a fool bet.
“Guess that makes you far from perfect,” Luke had said. “Something I’ve always known.”
Justin appreciated his brother’s frank assessment. It was hard living up to war-hero status. Luke always knew the right thing to say.
Unlike Justin, who now couldn’t summon the words he’d practiced saying a dozen times over: Brett is dead because of me.
And Aunt Mattie had the good grace not to ask about Brett’s death. The older woman was as wise as her years. He suspected she knew the pain it would cause both of them.
So Justin moved onto another subject. “Aunt Mattie,” he said. “Is it all right if I call you that?”
The woman’s eyes brightened. “I’d be honored.”
“I have an idea and I need your okay first. I’ve been thinking on this for a few months. And I hope you don’t mind me saying, the land around here has gone to ruin.”
“I won’t fault anyone the truth,” she said, nodding. “The place is a weed trap, full of gopher holes and snakes, and out beyond the dilapidated barn, there’s nothing but hard dirt and cactus. Ralph tried and tried, but when the doggone contracts dried up around here, he couldn’t keep the place right as rain like he wanted. He was a good man, my Ralph.”
“I know that, ma’am. Brett was always singing his praises. He said the hog farmers lost out to big companies and then the place sort of shriveled up along with those contracts. Brett wanted so much to bring this farm back to life when he got home.”
Tears misted in her eyes. “I know it. Brett’s heart was as big as this house and then some.”
“Well, I’m hoping to honor both Brett and your Ralph along with other war veterans. Ralph served in Vietnam and Brett gave his...his life in the Middle East. There’s a whole lot of men out there wounded on the inside and out who need help. I’m hoping you’ll sell your oute
r land to me. There’s got to be at least six hundred acres here that could be—”
“Six hundred and thirty-five,” she added.
Justin nodded. “With that acreage, I hope to build a retreat for wounded soldiers. We’d have horses here, and we’d build a facility, away from your house, that could be used for temporary lodging for the men. Young and old could come to work with horses. Sunset Ranch can provide mares and geldings that need some tender loving care of their own. It’d be an equine horse retreat. If you’re willing to sell, I’ll make sure this house gets the repairs it needs, too. It was Brett’s dream to restore this place, and I’d like to see that happen.”
Mattie’s teary eyes spilled over. “Why...I don’t know...oh, my goodness. That’s about the darnedest idea I’ve ever heard. My land...a retreat for soldiers?” Her voice broke to a frail whisper of awe. “Wouldn’t my Ralph and Brett love a notion like that?”
“Don’t cry, Aunt Mattie.” Justin slid down the sofa and plucked a tissue from a table by her recliner. He offered it to her and she thanked him as she dabbed at her tears. “I’d make you a fair offer for the land,” Justin assured her.
She waved him off with the hand holding the tissue. Sniffing, she spoke quietly. “I don’t have a doubt about it.”
Such blind faith. Justin took a hard swallow. Stabbed with guilt, a nagging voice in his head urged him on. This was the absolute right thing to do to honor Brett and Ralph and all soldiers who’d sacrificed their bodies as well as their souls for their country. They needed some TLC of their own. In a small way, he could make up for Mattie’s loss.
“If you agree to it, we can call the place the Gateway Equine Retreat.”
“Oh, my...” Joyful light beamed from her eyes, even though wet eyes. “I don’t know what I did to deserve all this,” she whispered, clearly astonished. “First Connor and Kat come into my life and now you, with an offer like this. I don’t see how I can refuse such a wonderful thing.”
“I think Brett would approve,” Justin said softly.
She began nodding. “Yes, he would.”
The front door swung open and Kat entered with a grocery bag on one hip and the baby flat up against her chest. Connor faced forward, his legs dangling from two openings in the sling that kept him plastered against her. Justin’s heart tumbled, seeing the two of them again. He rose from his seat and looked the boy straight in the eye. Connor didn’t turn away like he had before and his sweet inquisitive gaze nearly knocked Justin off his ass.
Baby mortar. More explosive and deadly than any IED he’d come across in Afghanistan.
He took hold of his emotions and walked over to help Kat with the bag, but before he could get close enough, she moved and let the grocery bag slip from her arm onto a maple end table.
Ignoring him, her gaze flew to Mattie’s teary face and a quick gasp escaped her throat. She turned accusing eyes toward him. “Justin, why are you here?”
“Kat, dear, Justin’s just told me something so—”
“What did you tell her?” Her face pinched tight with panic.
“Hold on,” he said quietly.
“I won’t hold on. You didn’t tell me you were coming by today.”
“I told Mattie I’d come by to talk about Brett.”
“He doesn’t need an invitation, dear. He told me the nicest stories, Kat. I’m sure you’d like to hear them, too.”
Kat’s shoulders slumped in relief, although Justin noted her annoyance, as well. She worked the latches on the baby sling and undid the contraption, wrapping her arms tight around Connor as she pulled him free. “Nice stories?” She raised her eyebrows. “Then why is Aunt Mattie crying?”
He pointed to the grocery bag. “You have any more of those in the car?”
She nodded.
“I’ll get them while Aunt Mattie tells you why I’m here.”
“Sit down with Connor, Kat,” the older woman said sweetly, dabbing at her eyes. “Justin’s come up with such a wonderful idea.”
Kat, in tight jeans and a soft pink sweater that revealed all her curves without revealing an inch of skin, did crazy things to him. The baby she held in her arms only added to the beautiful picture that stirred all of his emotions.
Baby mortar and blonde bombshell.
Pummeled by unexpected combative forces, he walked outside, climbed down the steps and leaned against the porch column to catch his breath.
Closing his eyes, he let go a few choice cuss words, then pushed off from the wall to unload the grocery bags from the car.
Coming home wasn’t supposed to be this hard.
* * *
Kat made the gravy, scraping at the crusted drippings from the pot roast she’d just removed from the pan. The gravy popped with bubbles as she stirred the rich brown sauce with the wooden spoon. Justin worked directly beside her, slicing the roast.
“Don’t need a knife for this,” he said. “The meat’s just falling away. I guess that’s what they mean by fork tender.”
Darn Aunt Mattie for inviting Justin to dinner.
He’d been hanging around all afternoon, helping her put groceries away, talking up his idea for the equine retreat to Aunt Mattie and now assisting in the dinner preparation while Connor and Aunt Mattie both napped.
“Didn’t get anything fork tender at the base.”
They bumped hips. It seized her breath, being so close to him. “I don’t imagine so.”
“The cooks wouldn’t win the first round in the Top Chef competition, that’s for sure.”
“Was it awful being there?” she asked as she focused her attention on the gravy. She didn’t want lumps to form in the sauce because she was distracted by the sexy man beside her. But he smelled so good. Woodsy and fresh.
It hurt to know he’d used her. She’d been running from abusive men all her life, but when Justin had pretended to be Brett, she’d poured her heart out to him. She’d told him things she hadn’t shared with anyone else, about her young life, about her dreams. Maybe it was because she knew he’d be leaving and she’d never have to face him again or maybe she just felt she could trust him. Could’ve been a little of both.
“Awful? It was kinda hard being isolated from the world. Makes a man feel out of touch with himself, his life, everything he’s ever known. All that’s up ahead is the mission and seeing that it turns out successful.” He put his head down, staring at the platter. “Losing Brett was the awful part.”
She turned and looked into eyes that couldn’t hide pain.
“You saved lives, Justin.”
“You’ve done some homework.”
She shrugged. “You’re a hero. Douglas County is throwing a parade in your honor. It’s been in the news.”
“Not my idea.”
“But you can’t deny that you saved five men. They would have died if you hadn’t been there.”
“I didn’t save Brett,” he whispered, taking a swallow, staring at the kitchen wall, “and I could have.”
Kat didn’t know about that. Nothing she’d read about Justin Slade mentioned his connection to Brett Applegate. Justin had been honored with the Congressional Medal of Honor and that wasn’t something to sneeze at. Five men were alive today because of his bravery.
“I’m sorry Brett died,” Kat found herself saying. “The retreat is a good way to honor him.”
Justin’s lips twisted and he shook his head. “I wanted to do something.”
“You are,” she said, turning off the burner. She faced him with a direct look and lowered her voice. “You’re keeping a secret that will protect his aunt’s life.”
“A few hours ago, you thought I’d gone back on that promise.”
“Aunt Mattie was crying. I didn’t know what to think.”
“You really care about her?”
/> His question unnerved her. Didn’t he think she was capable of caring for a woman who had shown her nothing but kindness? Didn’t he think her capable of putting someone else’s needs above her own? Not that Aunt Mattie could replace the mother she’d lost, but she felt a kinship with the older woman, a bond that was brought on by their mutual love of Connor. “Of course I care about her.”
Justin braced his hand on the kitchen counter and leaned in close, until his handsome face was all she could see in her line of vision. He touched a wisp of her hair, so gently, so tenderly. Her body reacted with warmth and a tingle that went down to her toes. He traced the line of her jaw with his index finger and shifted his gaze to her mouth. “I don’t go back on my promises, Kat.”
She swallowed. Aware they were alone in the small kitchen for the time being, she couldn’t muster the strength to back away. Tempted by his dark eyes and sensual memories, she spoke quietly. “But you lied to me over an entire weekend.”
“I wanted you.”
His hands came out to rest on her waist. Through her soft sweater, she felt the urgency of his touch, the potent pull as he gathered her closer. Their legs meshed together, her breasts crushed his chest. He groaned softly, letting her know what he intended. Their lips were inches apart.
“I still want you,” he whispered, right before his mouth claimed hers.
Kat fell into the kiss, the power of his sensual words and touch too much to fend off. She wanted him close. She wanted to feel his mouth on hers, to feel his body’s urgency and know she was the cause of his desire. She kissed him back, throwing her arms around his neck and feeling immeasurable heat between them.
He plunged his tongue into her mouth and she welcomed him with a soft moan. His kiss deepened and awakened her lust for the opposite sex. She hadn’t felt a need this powerful since before Connor was born. She needed Justin’s lips on hers, needed his body close, and reveled in the sensations he stirred in her.
He trailed away from her mouth to drizzle tiny biting nibbles on her throat. She craned her neck, allowing his lips to drift down to the base of her shoulders. His hands inched their way up the material of her sweater. Caressing the soft cashmere, he found her breasts and rubbed them with his palms. Between her legs, she throbbed with sparks of delight. She pulled his mouth to hers once again. She wanted more from him, now. Right now.
The Secret Heir of Sunset Ranch Page 6