by Beth Rinyu
My nerves were finally settling down, hours after arriving home from Mr. Simms’ as I stood on the patio putting the last details on my painting. I stood back and admired it sitting on the easel. Just the feel of the paint brush in my hand and the smell of the paints put my mind at total ease. This was where my heart was and I scolded myself for not allowing myself to do it more often. The beautiful star filled sky and glowing half-moon was the perfect canvas. I wondered what Drew was doing and if he was thinking about me the same way I was thinking about him. My thoughts began to drift once again to what was going to become of our relationship once we both became wrapped up again with school. I sighed deeply, trying to think positive. I knew that I was willing to make it work no matter what. We would only be an hour away and I could come home as much as possible on the weekends and Drew could come and visit me in the city whenever he had free time. I knew that if we both wanted it badly enough it was definitely doable. I only hoped that he was feeling the same way that I was. The sweet smell of honeysuckle wafted through the warm summer breeze while the crickets sang their familiar lullaby. I closed my eyes, taking it all in and wishing that Drew was with me right now and wondering if he was noticing just how beautiful the stars were tonight as well. As I opened my eyes, an idea struck me. I carefully took my painting off the easel and laid it out to dry before getting to work on my next masterpiece.
My eyes shot open to the sound of my ringing phone. Seeing Drew's name on my caller ID first thing in the morning was a nice way to start the day.
"Hey," I answered, feeling the smile instantly stretch across my face.
"Morning, gorgeous girl. Are you ready for your surprise?"
I lifted my head from my pillow to look at the time. "It's only seven a.m.," I laughed.
"The earlier the better."
"Okay, I just need to take a quick shower and get some caffeine," I replied, sitting up in my bed and stretching my body.
"No need to take a shower; you're going to be getting pretty dirty and we can stop for coffee. Just get dressed and I'll be there to get you in twenty…..oh, and wear jeans."
I hung up the phone, not liking the sound of that. What the heck could he possibly have planned that was going to get us dirty? Still, I was up for any adventure as long as it was with him. I had just finished dressing when I heard the doorbell ringing. I ran down the stairs two at a time, feeling that familiar yearning in my body when I opened the door and saw Drew standing in the doorway with his overgrown stubble on his face, and his rock hard chest molding to his tee shirt. I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him with vigor.
"Wow, that's a nice greeting!" he teased.
"Why thank you, Mr. Bryant," I teased back. I took his hand and he led me out to his car. "So where are we going?" I asked.
"To get you some coffee."
"After that, silly."
"I don't give away my surprises," he said, wrapping his seatbelt around him.
The euphoria I was feeling quickly washed away when I saw Mrs. Barrett's name on my caller ID. Being with Drew had totally erased my memory of yesterday. I took a deep breath before answering. Drew looked over at me, seemingly sensing my uneasiness.
"Good Morning, Mrs. Barrett," I answered.
"Good Morning, Becca. Thank you so much for dropping off that envelope to my house yesterday. I really appreciate it. I'm going to need you to deliver some more forms to Mr. Simms sometime next week."
"I'm sorry Mrs. Barrett, but you're going to have to find someone else to do it. I was put in a very uncomfortable situation yesterday while I was there and I will not be making anymore deliveries or pickups to his house." I could feel Drew's eyes burning into me.
"Oh I'm sorry, Becca. What happened?”
“I really don't care to discuss it. I just won't be going there anymore."
"Okay, sure. I hope this doesn't mean you're not going to be helping out anymore."
"No, I can still help out."
"Okay, good. Oh and I wanted to thank you for all of your hard work on that spreadsheet. It looks great."
"You're welcome."
We said our goodbyes and hung up.
"What was that all about?" Drew asked as we pulled into the parking lot to the coffee shop.
“Mrs. Barrett was in a bind yesterday and needed me to pick up some papers from Mr. Simms."
"Damn it, Becca! Why did you go there by yourself?" I could tell by the tone of his voice and the way that he had banged on the steering wheel that he wasn't happy.
"I - I don't know. She said he was away on business and that I would just have to get the envelope from his maid. But when I got there, he was there along with two other men that creeped me out even more than him."
"What happened?"
"Nothing really." I tried downplaying it.
"Becca, tell me!" he demanded.
I sighed heavily. "The one guy was his friend that supposedly had the modeling connections. He just got really close to me and just touched –me."
"Where the fuck did he touch you?" he shouted. The fury in his voice made me jump.
"Drew, calm down! He just put his hand on my leg, that's all. I got up and got out of there as fast as I could. I'm perfectly fine!" I said, caressing the side of his face and trying to put his mind at ease.
"DO NOT ever go there again! Do you hear me?" His voice was still on edge.
"I'm not planning on it.” I kissed him softly on the cheek. “Now can we forget about it and just get some coffee? By the looks of it, someone is a little cranky and could use some caffeine,” I teased, trying to put his worries to rest.
"I was in a good mood until you told me that," he said as we got out of the car. I hated seeing him so upset but at the same time it made me happy to know that he was genuinely concerned over me. He took my hand in his just before we got ready to walk into the coffee shop. "Just promise me that you will let me go with you to any more of these places she has you going." His tone was much softer.
I nodded. "Promise."
He kissed me softly on my lips and gripped my hand tighter. "Come on, Gorgeous, let's get you some coffee."
“Umm….should I be scared?” I asked Drew as we pulled down a long dirt driveway.
“Yup, forgot to mention I’m wanted in three states for murder.” He laughed.
As we finally came to the end, I focused on the sign Blackwell Stables. I shook my head and my stomach began to churn. “Oh no, Drew, I’m not ready for this.”
“Come on Becca, you can do it.”
“Drew, I’m –”
He placed his hand on mine. “Just try….for me? If you don’t feel comfortable then you can get right off. But at least try. This is something that you used to love to do, don’t be scared.”
“Fine….” I sighed deeply.
We got out of the car and I slowly made my way to the stable. “Come on Becca, you can do it,” Drew teased, pulling on my hand and forcing me to walk faster.
“Hey there!” We were greeted by a grey haired man and his Border Collie. “You must be Drew?” the man said, extending his hand.
“Yup, I am,” Drew answered, shaking his hand back.
“Norm Blackwell, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“This is Becca,” Drew said, introducing me to the man.
“Ah, Becca. I understand that you used to ride?”
I nodded. “Used to…I haven’t in a long time.”
“Well, I think I have the perfect horse for you.” We walked through the stable, finally coming to a stop at the pen of a beautiful black horse with white flecks throughout its coat. Even though I was nervous, I couldn’t help but smile. “It’s a Snowflake Appaloosa,” I said.
“A girl that knows her horses. I like that!” Mr. Blackwell smiled.
“I was always told that this breed is nasty,” I said, finally breaking myself from my fixation of staring at the magnificent creature standing before me.
Mr. Blackwell crinkled his eyebrows, looking a little insulte
d. “Now, who told you that? Ginny is just as nice as can be. They are actually a great breed, especially for new riders, it takes a lot to spook them.” I took a deep breath and looked into the horse’s eyes. “What do you think? You want to give her a chance?”
“I guess,” I said with a shrug of my shoulders. The butterflies erupted as he began to saddle her up.
“You’re going to be fine,” Drew whispered in my ear. We followed him as he led her out of the pen, stopping her next to a beautiful Mustang that was already saddled and ready to go.
“The hardest part is getting back on for the first time, Becca. Once you do that, you’ll be riding like a pro again.” I took a deep breath and moved closer. I grabbed onto her mane and stood shoulder to shoulder before placing my foot in the stirrup, lifting myself up and swinging my right leg over her back. I breathed a sigh of relief when she stood quietly and didn’t step out while I mounted her. Mr. Blackwell smiled. “See how it all comes back to you? Just like riding a bike.” I could feel my legs trembling as I held tightly to the reigns. “Remember, Becca, she can sense if you’re nervous. Just take a deep breath and relax.”
I nodded, trying my best to do just that.
“Okay, Drew, since you’re an expert, you get one of my best. This is Blaze.”
My eyes widened. Drew was actually going to ride the beautiful Mustang standing next to me. He had never even mentioned that he had ridden before to me.
“Drew, I didn’t know that you’ve ridden before!” I was thoroughly impressed with his ability to mount the horse, who was nowhere near as calm as mine.
“Just a little.” He smirked.
“Okay, before I send you two on your way, take a couple laps around, Becca. I want to make sure that you and Ginny are a good fit,” Mr. Blackwell said.
Drew gave me a look of reassurance before I gently pulled on the reigns and Ginny began trotting slowly around the penned in area. My nerves started subsiding before we were even halfway through the first lap and by the time we were done with the second, I couldn’t wipe the smile from my face. And just like my artwork, I was silently scolding myself for not doing something that I loved so much, sooner. Mr. Blackwell and Drew were grinning from ear to ear as I reached them.
“I think the two of you make a good pair,” Mr. Blackwell said, looking at me and then Ginny. “I’ll see you guys in an hour,” he said as he headed back into the stable.
“Ready?” Drew asked.
I nodded, unable to wipe the smile from my face. The horses walked off to the open field. I could tell right away that Drew had ridden quite a few times just in the way he was handling his horse, who seemed a little less tame than others I had been around. “So how come you never told me that you’ve ridden before?” I asked.
He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. I didn’t think it was a big deal.” He smiled over at me.
By the time we were halfway into our ride, I was totally relaxed. I couldn’t believe that I had allowed myself to be scared of doing this for all those years. The warm morning sun beating on my neck and the calmness of the horse beneath me radiated into me. “Thank you so much for making me overcome my fears. This is just so much fun, Drew.”
“I knew you could do it. You can’t let fear hold you back. Just because something bad happened once it doesn’t mean it’s going to happen again. Some of the best moments are those that we never imagined ourselves in again. Don’t ever let anything prevent you from what you want to do. If you want it bad enough, it’s always obtainable no matter what obstacles are in your way. Sometimes, those road blocks make it much more gratifying when you do finally reach that goal.”
I nodded, hoping that he would apply that same logic to us when it came to our relationship. He had opened my eyes so much in just the short time that I had known him. I was not only experiencing new and exciting things with him, but he allowed me to open that part of my heart that had been closed for so long. That part that I kept all of the stuff that I enjoyed doing so much tucked away in, so I could focus on being the perfect daughter and perfect student. Drew helped me realize that I could be as many things as I wanted to be. I could paint beautiful pictures, ride horses, and be absolutely caught up in him, while still being a good daughter and student. We may have joked around about his lessons that he was teaching me with my confidence and in the bedroom, but he truly was the best teacher I had ever known in teaching me one of the most important things in life….happiness.
After our ride, Drew and I went out to breakfast before he dropped me back off at home. We had made plans to hang out at my house for dinner and a movie, and I found myself counting the hours until I could see him again. The warm sunshine was so relaxing, drying me off from the laps that I just swam in the pool while lulling me to sleep as I lay in the lounge chair. I jumped and quickly sat up, feeling the presence of someone standing over me.
“Oh my God, Ashton, what the hell are you doing here?” I said, holding my hand over my heart which was beating at warp speed.
His signature Cheshire cat grin stretched across his face. “Maybe you should tell your dad to install a better security system on the gate; wouldn’t want anyone coming in and stealing his precious Becca, now would he?” He didn’t try to hide that he was checking out every inch of my body as I sat there in my bikini. I grabbed the towel from the back of my chair and wrapped myself in it. “Don’t cover up on my account, Becca.”
“What do you want?” I snapped.
“I was looking for Jordan.”
“He’s not here, and what do you want with my brother anyway? I told you before, stay the hell away from him!”
“Oh you are so intimidating, Becca! I better do what you say. I wouldn’t want you to kick my ass.” He smirked.
I swung my legs over the chair and glared up into the bright sunshine at him. “I’m telling you right now, if this has anything to do with the shit that you had him involved with that night at the party, I will tell your parents.”
“Oh no! Please don’t tell my mom and dad! I’m so scared!” He mocked.
“Just leave, Ashton!”
He stared at me one last time and started to walk away. “Hey Becca,” he turned back around and shouted. “Maybe you should stop spending so much time turning up your nose at me and worry about what your boyfriend is doing instead. But that’s okay; when he dumps you for another hot piece of ass, you know where to find me. I’ll gladly take sloppy seconds.”
I shook my head. I didn’t want him to know that he had just struck a major chord. What the heck did he mean by that? Drew and I were spending almost all of our time together. If there was something or someone else, I think I would have sensed it. I watched him walk out the gate and breathed a sigh of relief when I heard his car start up. The happiness that I was feeling from the morning had suddenly vanished all within three minutes of being around Ashton. My brother and Drew were now in the forefront of my mind. If Jordan had lied to me and was still involved with Ashton then I had no choice but to tell my parents. I knew he would hate me for it, but it was for his own good. I headed inside to take a shower, trying my best to prevent that seed that Ashton had planted in my head about Drew from growing. Unfortunately, the harder I tried, the faster it was taking root.
I couldn’t control my laughter as I tried my best to teach Drew to use chopsticks while we ate our Chinese takeout. I didn’t bother telling him anything about my little visit from Ashton earlier in the day. We were having such a great time and I didn’t want any talk of that bringing us down. After thinking it over, I surmised that he was more than likely lying to drum up trouble anyway. The sun was just beginning to set as we sat out on the patio.
“Finally giving up?” I teased as he picked up his fork and began eating his rice.
“I surrender.” He laughed. “I will never master the art of using chopsticks.”
“Hey, what happened to your pep talk from earlier about never giving up on something you really want?”
“Yeah, well,
eating with chopsticks isn’t exactly one of my life long goals,” he joked.
“I really had a great time this morning. Thank you so much for making me get back up on that horse again.”
“No problem.” His smile unleashed the butterflies, making it impossible for me to resist leaning over the table and planting a gentle kiss on his cheek.
“Hey, I got a little present for you.”
“Oh, yeah?” He smiled.
“Not that, silly….well, yeah, that too,” I corrected myself. “But that comes later,” I teased, getting up from the table and kissing him once again before heading inside to get the paintings. “Close your eyes,” I shouted as I walked back outside. “Okay you can open them.” I stood in front of him holding up both paintings of my version of a starry night.
His eyes widened in amazement. “Wow, Becca, did you do those?” I nodded and smiled. “They are awesome.”
“Thanks! I tried to replicate each of them to a tee, right down to the amount of stars. Do you notice the one difference?” I asked.
He examined them both closely. “The moon?”
I nodded. “Yup, one is a first quarter moon and the other is a third quarter.” He raised his eyebrows at me. “Yeah, I know I’m a bit of an Astrology geek. But I did one painting for you and one for me. That way when we go back to school we can each have our paintings and know that we’re looking up at the same star filled sky. I can be the first quarter and you can be the third quarter and together we can be the full moon.” My heart sank to my knees when the smile that was on his face instantly disappeared and he looked down at the ground. Oh God I was so stupid! It was too soon to be getting into this deep psychological stuff with him. He clearly wasn’t ready for it. The last thing I wanted was for him to think I was getting too needy and scare him away. “I’m – I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-”
“No, Becca, it’s okay.” He finally looked up at me again and I wasn’t quite sure if it was pain or surprise that I was seeing in his eyes. “Thank you. It’s really a great painting,” he whispered. He stood up and kissed me on the forehead before hugging me tightly, still seeming a little unsettled.