Lost In You

by Jade Winters

  ‘How could I refuse an offer like that?’

  ‘You can’t,’ Vanessa said.

  Heidi’s heart hammered in a frenzied rhythm as she settled her mouth on Vanessa’s and kissed her long and hard, her tongue probing and searching every inch of her mouth.

  ‘Just one thing,’ Heidi said.

  ‘What’s that?’ Vanessa asked breathlessly.

  ‘Can we leave the massage until after the shower?’

  Vanessa laughed. ‘We can do whatever you like. The night is yours.’

  The scent of vanilla permeated the bathroom from the candles Vanessa lit. She guided Heidi to the middle of the room, and tantalisingly slowly, began to remove Heidi’s clothes. Sure, confident fingers unbuttoned Heidi’s shirt and pushed it back over her shoulders before tossing it aside. Vanessa moved closer as her hands reached behind Heidi’s back to expertly unclip her bra. Standing there exposed, Heidi drew in a deep breath when Vanessa’s fingers gently swept over her erect nipples before searing a path down to her waist. Her jeans slid to the floor moments later, swiftly followed by her underwear. Keeping her eyes locked on Heidi’s, Vanessa quickly undressed herself before taking Heidi’s hand and leading her to the shower. Under darting pellets of water, Heidi flattened her back against the tiles, the cool surface causing goose pimples to explode over her skin as Vanessa’s mouth covered her breast. Sucking, circling, teasing.Then, Vanessa’s mouth was on Heidi’s, hot and hungry, devouring her in a mutual assault. Heidi entwined her fingers in Vanessa’s damp hair as Vanessa’s mouth moved to her neck, nipping Heidi’s throat with her teeth. Heidi’s clit throbbed when Vanessa closed her eyes and bit her bottom lip as Heidi slid her hand between her legs. Vanessa was already wet and waiting.

  Vanessa took a sharp breath as Heidi’s fingers plunged deep inside her. Long lustful groans escaped Vanessa’s lips as each thrust filled her. Still inside her, Heidi pressed Vanessa against the wall. Maintaining her thrusting rhythm, Heidi slowly knelt down. Water blurred her vision as she looked up into Vanessa’s face, but she didn’t care; she needed to see the sight of Vanessa’s sexual hunger as she fused her mouth to Vanessa’s most intimate nerve centre. At the probing of Heidi’s tongue into Vanessa’s molten release, Vanessa’s body jerked uncontrollably, causing her to grip the back of Heidi’s head. Vanessa grabbed fistfuls of Heidi’s hair as Heidi slowly withdrew her fingers and clasped both hands firmly on Vanessa’s behind to steady her. She pressed her hot tongue into Vanessa’s entrance, bringing Vanessa ever closer to the moment she was now pleading for.

  Heidi didn’t remember when exactly, or how they exited the shower and went into Vanessa’s bedroom, but they were now sprawled out on her enormous bed, as their water slick bodies writhed and grinded. Fingers probed and stroked, tongues teased and searched.

  And much, much later, as their bodies vibrated with the strength of an earthquake, Heidi knew in her heart that no matter what the future held for them, she never wanted to be without Vanessa again.

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  They couldn’t carry on like this, Vanessa decided, as she watched over Heidi as she slept. She was so beautiful, giving, loyal, warm, loving and as sexy as hell. Heidi was everything anyone could ever want and so much more. She would have to make up her mind to either accept the way she felt about her, allowing things to move forward or end it once and for all. The thought of never seeing Heidi again made her heart sink, but she knew if she couldn’t, or wouldn’t commit to her, the only solution would be to let her go. Heidi deserved better than to be messed around.

  As usual, when Vanessa found herself wanting to avoid the inevitable, she opted to work. She needed some head space. Besides, she would never make a decision that was going to affect the rest of her life in the aftermath of a few hours of amazing sex.

  Vanessa gently kissed Heidi’s temple before easing herself out from underneath the covers. She dragged on a pair of jeans and a jumper before quietly letting herself out of the room. Glancing down the hallway, Vanessa noticed Kelli’s light was still on under the door. She hadn’t heard her come in; she only hoped that Kelli hadn’t heard their lovemaking. The last thing Vanessa wanted was to embarrass her or make her feel uncomfortable. Nobody wanted to hear their aunt having sex.

  Turning her desk lamp on, Vanessa settled on her chair with the full intention of working on the new proposal for the centre, yet every time she looked at the new design, her mind flooded with images of Heidi and the first time they had met. It seemed so long ago now; she could barely believe it had only been a matter of weeks.

  Vanessa cocked her head when she heard a sound downstairs. She smiled to herself when faint footsteps caused the staircase to creek. Vanessa had been mistaken—Kelli wasn’t upstairs after all; she was sneaking up to her room now. Although it was two in the morning, Vanessa decided to give her a break. As long as it wasn’t the police bringing her home, she would give her some slack.

  Right. Concentrate.

  A loud click sounded down the hallway, but Vanessa decided against investigating it as she didn’t want any more interruptions. She rolled out the plan and peered closely at it. Brett really had done a wonderful job of incorporating the centre. She knew Craig was livid at her new proposal; pretty much as she had expected, but with Kelli’s vote in a few days, there was no way he could have reversed the board’s decision. Now lost in her work, Vanessa was unaware of the impending danger. It was only when a burning smell invaded her nostrils that she quickly jumped to her feet.

  Had she forgotten to put the fire guard up? With much speed, she ran downstairs to the living room, the smell much stronger now. She poked her head in, expecting to see a log on the floor burning, but there was nothing. Then she saw a faint grey cloud growing before her eyes. ‘What the ….’ She ran to the kitchen. Nothing was on—no pots on the hob, no sign of an electrical fire. Now convinced the smoke wasn’t coming from inside, she walked to the front door and poked her head out, sniffing. Nothing. As she shut the door, she heard a strange noise coming from upstairs. Was Kelli burning something in her room? Vanessa bolted up the stairs, taking two steps at a time. As she rounded the corner, she froze. Paralysed in shock as waves of smoke engulfed her. It took a few seconds for her to comprehend what lay ahead. Fire. Climbing up the walls. Snaking its orange flamed body along the carpeted floor, all the way back to Kelli’s room.

  Kelli!

  Thinking her name, Vanessa snapped out of her daze. She moved quickly towards Kelli’s room, when suddenly an intense flame erupted, forcing her to jump back.

  ‘Kelli! Kelli!’ she screamed at the top of her lungs. ‘Jump out the window. Can you hear me, jump out the window!’

  Vanessa knew Kelli must have heard her. There was no way she couldn’t have. Even as she thought this, Vanessa wondered why Heidi hadn’t come out to see what the commotion was. An air of unreality permeated her as she spun round, ran to her bedroom and flung the door open. The stench of fumes was overpowering. Horrified, Vanessa watched the billows of smoke curl and crawl around the floor.

  ‘Jesus! Heidi, wake up!’ Vanessa screamed at the top of her voice as she raced to rouse her. ‘Heidi? Heidi, can you hear me?’

  But Heidi didn’t respond. She was unconscious. Her head lolled from side to side as Vanessa shook her shoulders. The room, thick with smoke, barely had enough oxygen for Vanessa to breathe. Without thinking, Vanessa rolled Heidi’s lifeless body into the cover like a cocoon and with all of her strength, dragged her off the bed and down the hallway, choking and retching as smoke filled her lungs. She couldn’t afford to think about herself, her only consideration was getting Heidi outside. Jumping down a couple of stairs, she gripped the cover and pulled, trying her hardest not to hurt Heidi, yet at the same time, dragging her as fast as she could. Vanessa could now see shadows of flames flickering on the wall. At last, she was on the bottom step. With a mighty heave, she dragged Heidi the final few feet, her arms weakening with every pull. Vanessa made it to the door and, as she opened i
t, was filled with relief to see many of her neighbours swarming outside in their nightwear. Robert, her next-door neighbour, was at her side in seconds. He effortlessly pulled Heidi outside of the house.

  ‘Here, let me see her.’ A woman’s authoritative voice came out of nowhere. ‘It’s okay, I’m a doctor.’

  They both stepped aside as the doctor knelt down beside Heidi and began checking her vitals.

  ‘Thank God you’re all right. I called the fire brigade,’ Robert said. ‘Is Maggie inside?’

  ‘No. She’s visiting friends.’ Vanessa kept her eye on Heidi. ‘Kelli had to get out the window—’

  ‘Vanessa, I’ve been round the back.’ His expression was forlorn. ‘I didn’t see Kelli. When I looked up all the windows were closed.’

  Vanessa’s body trembled and nausea overcame her as she glanced at her house and saw nothing but red angry flames. Kelli!

  She imagined Kelli in her bedroom, slowly suffocating on the smoke. ‘No I told her to jump out the window. She heard me, she must have. Please stay with her,’ Vanessa’s voice broke as she spoke to the doctor. Then without a second thought for her own life, she ran back into the house.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Vanessa awoke in the hospital cubicle and, in a panic, tore the oxygen mask from her face. Tears sprung to her eyes as the realisation of what had happened hit her with full force. Kelli was gone. Though her lungs burnt, she knew she couldn’t stay in isolation, not knowing if Heidi was safe. Although the doctor had tried his best to persuade her to remain in bed for a few more hours, Vanessa had politely declined. She needed to be with Heidi, now more than ever. Someone had tried to kill them; that she was sure of. The stench of petrol still remained in her nostrils. If she hadn’t woken up, they would both be dead now. It would only be a matter of time before the person responsible for lighting the fire realised that there had been survivors. What was to stop them from trying again?

  Vanessa called the police and was informed that an officer was already on the way to the hospital. Feeling somewhat safer being surrounded by people as she waited outside Heidi’s hospital room, she placed several calls to Kelli’s mobile phone in a desperate hope that she would answer it, that somehow the impossible had become possible; but each call had gone straight through to voicemail.

  Not wanting to believe the reality of the situation, in her mind, Vanessa had played out many different scenarios; one where Kelli could have escaped the inferno, or she was still hiding somewhere, unconscious but alive, but all scenarios led to the same conclusion. Not even seasoned fire fighters could have escaped that inferno without protective equipment and a water hose. Vanessa had racked her brain for hours, trying to remember if apart from Kelli’s bedroom light being on, she’d heard any sound or movement. Did she call out to me?

  The door to the room where Heidi was currently being monitored opened and a tall bearded doctor exited, still in conversation with a nurse. When he spotted Vanessa, he walked over.

  ‘Can I see her?’ Vanessa asked before he had a chance to speak.

  He nodded. ‘She’s just coming round, but please, don’t excite her too much. I’ll be back in a few hours to check on her.’

  Vanessa nodded her thanks and opened the door. For a few moments, she stood in the doorway, not knowing if she was strong enough to see Heidi yet. She stared at her still body and even from where Vanessa stood, she could see Heidi’s flawless skin still had a few patches of soot. Having something to focus her mind on, Vanessa went into the toilet, took a handful of tissue and wet it before going to Heidi’s side. Very gently, she wiped the dirt off her face, hoping that she wouldn’t wake up yet; not until Vanessa’s bloodshot eyes had shed their awful pinkness, but it was too late to hope. Heidi’s eyes slowly opened. Upon seeing Vanessa, a faint smile played on her lips then disappeared, only to be replaced with a look of concern.

  Heidi attempted to pull the oxygen mask from her mouth, but Vanessa gently restrained her arm.

  ‘Don’t try and talk,’ she told her softly. ‘I’m fine.’

  Heidi’s eyes bored into Vanessa’s. Her voice was muffled beneath the mask. ‘The house?’

  Vanessa contemplated lying to her, but she didn’t have the strength to carry through with it. However, she wouldn’t mention the petrol. She would follow the doctor’s instructions not to upset her. ‘Gutted.’

  Heidi closed her eyes briefly. When she opened them, she turned her head left and right, her gaze searching the room.

  ‘Kelli?’

  Vanessa couldn’t answer. The words stuck in her throat. She couldn’t bear to think again of the torturous vision she had of Kelli trapped in her room, waiting for Vanessa to save her. Just like she had when Lauren died, Vanessa had let her down. Again. ‘She’s gone, Heidi. Kelli’s gone.’

  Vanessa lowered her head and lay her face against Heidi’s stomach. Heidi stroked her hair and, finally, the dam broke and Vanessa sobbed uncontrollably: For the time that had been wasted on arguing, for the time that they would no longer have together. Just when she thought that the final piece of the puzzle had slotted into place, it was sod’s law to find out that wasn’t the case after all. Vanessa had finally found the woman of her dreams, but at a price. Why is there always a price? Why did I have to give up my niece as a sacrifice? How the hell is that fair?

  A knock at the door caused Vanessa to lift her head. A woman dressed in a dark blue suit appeared. For a moment, Vanessa thought she was a consultant, but the hardened look in her eyes told her she was most probably a police officer.

  ‘Sorry to intrude,’ she said, her eyes drifting from Heidi to Vanessa. ‘Vanessa O’Neil?’

  Vanessa nodded. She straightened, but entwined her hand with Heidi’s.

  ‘I’m Detective Sergeant Harrison from the London Met. I thought you’d like to know, the Fire Investigation Unit did a sweep of your house and no bodies were found.’

  Vanessa’s eyes widened. Her jaw literally dropped open. Had she just heard right. Kelli was nowhere to be found? She glanced down at Heidi for confirmation. Seeing the look of relief in her eyes confirmed it.

  ‘Are they absolutely sure?’ she asked.

  ‘Yes. There was nobody else home,’ she said. The officer stepped into the room and shut the door behind her. ‘But from the report I read, it looks like the fire was set deliberately.’

  ‘That’s what I told your colleague,’ Vanessa said, forgetting momentarily Heidi was listening. ‘I knew it.’

  Heidi looked up at her in confusion and Vanessa laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder. ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t want you to find out like this, but the house stank of petrol.’

  ‘Ms O’Neil, is there anyone who would want to hurt you?’

  Vanessa looked at Heidi with horrid suspicion and Heidi shook her head.

  The officer noticed the exchange between the women then advanced and sat down in one of the hard, plastic chairs. ‘Look, if there’s anything I should know, no matter how irrelevant.’

  ‘It’s just that I’ve been having a few problems with my niece.’

  The detective took a small notepad from the side of her jacket. ‘I see.’

  ‘But we’ve sorted things out now—’

  ‘And where is …?’

  ‘Kelli.’

  ‘Kelli now?’

  Heidi squeezed her hand until it hurt. ‘I don’t think she would do something like this.’

  The detective shrugged. ‘I’d still like to have a word with her.’

  ‘I don’t know where she is. I thought she’d been caught in the fire.’

  Heidi tore the mask from her face and rasped angrily, ‘Do you really think Kelli would resort to killing us? She might have been angry, but she’s no killer.’

  The detective’s phone rang and she gave them an apologetic glance before answering it. She listened for a few minutes before hanging up. ‘I’ve just been informed a neighbour saw a black Bentley drive away a few minutes before the blaze. Do you know of anyone who driv
es that kind of car?’

  Heidi and Vanessa exchanged shocked glances. Vanessa was so startled by the possibility of Craig’s involvement that she could barely believe it, but that didn’t mean she was going to let her disbelief stand in the way of justice. He had nearly killed them. ‘Yes, I do. Craig O’Neil.’

  ‘Craig O’Neil,’ the detective said, writing the name down in a small notebook. Suddenly she looked up, wide-eyed. ‘Isn’t he—’

  ‘Yes, detective. He’s my brother.’

  The detective rose. ‘I’ll bring him in for questioning. I’ll keep you updated on our progress.’

  ‘Thank you.’

  After the officer left, Vanessa dropped onto the seat she had just vacated. She ran a nervous hand through her hair. ‘That bastard. That dirty rotten bastard. Not even I thought he’d stoop this low.’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ Heidi said weakly.

  Vanessa was on her feet again, leaning over Heidi and kissing her forehead. ‘What are you apologising for?’

  ‘If it wasn’t for me and that centre, none of this would have happened.’

  ‘And I would never have met the ….’ She paused for a moment. The timing still didn’t feel right. Not under such dire circumstances. ‘You.’

  Vanessa didn’t miss the look of disappointment in Heidi’s eyes. She would tell her the words she wanted to hear soon. Just not today.

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  ‘Hey, Heidi.’ A familiar voice filtered into Heidi’s head. She opened her eyes and looked straight into Kelli’s gaze. Alive, so very alive and well. She stood next to Vanessa, both beaming and holding flowers and chocolates.

  ‘How’re you feeling?’ Kelli asked.

  ‘Better for seeing you.’

  ‘I’m sorry I scared you like that. Christina was meant to drop me home after the party but I decided to crash at her place,’ she said, her pale cheeks suddenly flushing.