All I Want

by J. Daniels

  I lick my lips as I picture him, worried and unable to sit still while I endured one of the worst dates in history. I twirl my hair around my finger. “You did?”

  “Of course I did,” he affirms. “I don’t like to share, so yeah, I was fucking worried. But I want you to be relaxed with me tonight, and I thought getting last night out of your system would help. Did it?”

  “Not really.”

  He laughs again. “Well that plan was a complete waste of time. How are you feeling about tonight?”

  My smile cracks through the mask of aggravation I’m wearing and I turn my head, eyeing up the tank top next to me. “I’m excited, and nervous. But more excited than anything.”

  “I’m dying to kiss you. Would it be weird if I did it as soon as I get there? ’Cause I might not be able to stop myself.”

  “Are you trying to get decked?” I ask, playful smirk in place.

  “Hmm, I like it pretty rough so, maybe I am.”

  “How rough?” My voice teeters on the line between seductive and pure curiosity. His breathing grows louder in my ear before a beep alerts me of an incoming call. “Um, can you hold on a second? I’m getting another call.”

  “If you wanna know how rough I like it, don’t keep me waiting.”

  I bite my lip, holding my phone above me and seeing Mia’s name flashing on my screen. I accept the call.

  “You better be calling to tell me you’re in labor. Tyler was just about to give me explicit details on how he likes to fuck, and I have a feeling he isn’t going to be shy about it.”

  Her soft chuckle is tense, edgy even, and the reason behind it hits me when I remember what day it is.

  “Shit. Hold on one second, okay?” She responds with a soft “Hmm mmm” before I click over to my other call. “Hey, I’m sorry, I gotta go. My friend needs me.”

  “Yeah? Well, get that outta your system now. I’m coming to this thing tonight to see you, not to tag along with your friends.”

  I swallow down the smartass rebuttal that stings the tip of my tongue, and decide against taking his words as anything other than playful. He’s probably just geared up from the turn our conversation just took. I know I am.

  “I’ll see you tonight,” I reply with genuine optimism.

  “Can’t fucking wait.”

  I click back over to Mia. “Hey, I’m really sorry about that. I completely forgot what today is. How is everything there?”

  “It’s… a lot.” She sighs heavily. “I don’t know why it feels so different being here now. I wasn’t this sad when Ben and I came here to get the rest of my stuff eight months ago. But yesterday, when we pulled up in front of my old house so Nolan could see it, I broke down sobbing, and that completely freaked Ben out. He wanted to call my doctor, and take me to the hospital to make sure I wasn’t crying too much for the baby.”

  I stifle my laugh with tightly pursed lips. Typical Ben. “Well, it is the anniversary of her death, and you’re also very pregnant. It could be the hormones making you so emotional.”

  “Yeah, I guess. I just really didn’t want to spend this whole weekend crying. I wanted this to be a great memory for Nolan, and I feel like I’m ruining it for everyone.”

  I sit up, leaning against the headboard and stretching my legs out in front of me. “Mia, you’re not ruining anything. I’m sure Nolan is having a great time. What’s he doing right now?”

  “Trying to climb on one of the fighter jets at the air base.” She giggles softly and I smile. “He may have a new obsession. Don’t be surprised if dragons take a backseat to airplanes when we get home.”

  “It’s about damn time. That kid has had the same fixation since before he could walk.”

  “Well, honestly, I hope he doesn’t give them up completely. I like the whole knight thing, and I already bought Chase a dragon Halloween costume so Nolan can pretend to slay him.”

  “How morbid of you,” I say through a laugh, hearing her join me.

  “Crap, hold on. Nolan, be careful! Ben, can you grab him?” she yells, her voice muted. “Hey, he’s running all over the place, so I’m gonna have to go. But you better text me later and let me know how tonight goes.”

  “Explicit details coming your way,” I say as I scoot off the bed.

  “Oh, God. I’m going to regret saying that, aren’t I?”

  I shrug. “All I know is I’m getting laid by somebody. And, if necessary, I’ll start batting for Team Reed.”

  She laughs hysterically, the kind of Mia laugh that I know has her tearing up. “Please, God, let that happen.”

  “Yikes. I’ll talk to ya later. Love you.”

  “Love you too.”

  I hang up the call, tossing my phone onto the bed before I stare down at my outfit selection, hands on my hips. If my short skirt doesn’t get me some attention at this thing, my curve-hugging top definitely will. There’s no reason why tonight shouldn’t end my year-long dry spell. I’m more than ready for this. I need to move on, and hopefully after tonight, I’ll forget all about Luke Evans.

  ***

  I park amongst the other cars in the grassy terrain at the edge of Sandy Point Beach. These things are always a huge turnout, bringing in people from nearby towns to pay ten dollars to drink as much as they want. The music is already pumping through the air as I walk between the cars, stepping onto the sand and making my way toward the crowd. Mike Weston, one of the guys who throws these parties several times a year, is standing by the kegs, collecting money. I walk up to him and he looks down at me, giving me his usual smile after his typical once-over of my outfit.

  “There’s the girl who refuses to go out with me,” he teases, tucking the roll of cash he’s holding into his pocket. His blue eyes regard me kindly. “What’s up, Tessa?”

  I hand him my money with a shrug. “Not much. Is Reed here yet?”

  He nods, taking my ten-dollar bill and handing me a red Solo cup filled with beer. “Yeah, I just saw him over by the pit. You here with anyone?”

  I smile, knowing exactly what he’s implying. Mike has been asking me out for years, but he’s definitely not my type, and although I like to do my fair share of flirting, I’ve never led him on to think we’re anything more than friends. I turn, holding up my beer over my shoulder. “I’ll see ya around, Mike.”

  He laughs behind me as I take a sip of my beer, walking toward the giant bonfire in the middle of the beach. There are people dancing around it while others are sitting on logs, talking with other partiers. Or if they’re Reed, not bothering with conversation, because they’re too busy shoving their hand up some random chick’s skirt.

  I tap him on the shoulder, breaking up his fingering session with a girl I don’t recognize. But that’s not surprising at all. The girl shoots her eyes open, panting heavily through ragged breaths, as his hand slides out from between her legs. She glares up at me as she tugs her skirt back down to mid-vagina.

  “Can you go grab me another beer?” he asks, causing her to soften the nasty look she’s giving me for interrupting her special time with a guy who will want nothing to do with her come tomorrow. It’s how Reed operates, and every girl he shows an interest in is made aware of that before he does more than talk to them. Although, I’m not sure it needs to be said. His reputation for only wanting one night with a girl has crossed state lines.

  “Sure.” She stands, yelping when he smacks her on the ass before she walks away.

  He looks up at me, sitting forward and resting his forearms on his knees. “Did Mike hit on you already?” he asks with a mocking smile.

  I grimace. “I don’t know why he even bothers. There are at least fifty chicks here that he can try and get with. He’s wasting his time with me.” I keep my eyes on the crowd as I take quick sips of my beer, scanning for two faces and only really wanting to see one. Squinting, I try and focus on the group of people through the tall flames across the pit, but I can’t make them out as well as I’d like. I move to the other side of Reed to see better, dropping
my gaze to the sand when I don’t see who I’m looking for.

  “When is that guy supposed to get here?” he asks, prompting me to look over at him.

  “Six o’clock. What time is it?”

  He pulls out his phone and lights up the screen. “Six thirteen.”

  I run a hand through my hair, letting out an exhaustive grunt. “I hate lateness. This guy better have a damn good reason for making me wait. And, by that, I mean nothing less than a carjacking. His ass better be walking here.”

  Reed looks over my shoulder, eyes widening with curiosity. Before I can turn around to see who’s grabbed his attention, strong hands grip my hips and a body presses against my back. I’m turned before I can protest and soft, full lips move against mine as one hand wraps around my waist, pinning me against the hard body.

  “I had trouble finding the place. Your directions sucked,” he says against my mouth, keeping his firm grip on me as he tilts his head and deepens the kiss.

  And I let him. I forget all about my threat to knock his ass out if he kissed me as soon as he got here. Because this guy, fucking right, this guy knows exactly how to use his tongue, and I’d be a very stupid woman to interrupt something this amazing.

  My body goes limp against him as my eyes flutter close and my beer falls to the sand. He tastes like watermelon, and I fully surrender myself to a man I haven’t even gotten a good look at yet. But with a mouth like this, I’m willing to wait a few more seconds to make that observation.

  I moan as he pulls away, a suggestive smirk playing across his mouth. He runs his thumb along my bottom lip, smearing the wetness along my skin. “Hmm.”

  I smile before giving him my own, “Hmm.” And then I really focus on him, all of him, confirming his identity and loving every detail of it. His blond hair is down, tucked behind his ear and stopping just below his jawline. He’s rocking the perfect amount of facial hair, which I now know feels soft against my easily irritated skin. And he’s firm. Very firm.

  “You must be Tyler,” Reed says, standing to his feet. He moves next to me and holds his hand out in front of him. “I’m Reed, Tessa’s friend. It’s good to meet you.”

  Tyler stares at him for several awkward seconds before letting go of my waist, and firmly shaking Reed’s hand. “Friends, huh? You ever been more than that?”

  Reed laughs, as do I, but Tyler remains completely serious. His hand slides along my back, grips my hip, and pulls me closer.

  “Here you go, baby,” a meek voice says from behind us. Reed’s flavor of the day walks up and holds out his beer, glancing over at me briefly before beaming back at him.

  Reed smiles, taking the cup and putting his arm around her shoulder. “Thanks. This is Tessa and Tyler,” he says, motioning toward us with his drink. “Guys, this is Alice.”

  “Alicia,” she corrects him with a glare.

  Tyler laughs next to me, but Reed merely frowns and shrugs it off. “Yeah, that’s what I said. Alicia.” He looks up at us. “We’re gonna go take a walk. I’ll catch up with you guys later.”

  “See ya,” I reply, watching as the two of them disappear into the crowd. I look up at Tyler, catching his eyes on me. “Do you wanna get a drink?”

  He shakes his head as he shamelessly drops his gaze to my mouth.

  “Do you want to sit down and talk?” I ask.

  He shakes his head again, never meeting my eyes. “I wanna get outta here.”

  I shift my footing so we’re standing chest to chest, his hand flattening against my lower back. At this closeness, and without the distraction of his mouth on me, I focus on his scent. Like fresh rain water and something else I can’t quite put my finger on. Honey, maybe?

  Oh, God, yes. That’s what it is. Honey.

  He steps back with a smile, grabs my hand, and pulls me in the direction I just came from only minutes ago.

  “I thought you wanted to party?” I question as I move with him through the crowd of people. I wave at a few girls I graduated from high school with before glancing over at him.

  He grins down at me. “I do, with you. I don’t give a shit about anybody else here.”

  “Hmm,” I reply, hearing his soft chuckle next to me. I look ahead of us and stop dead in my tracks, causing Tyler to stumble forward when I refuse to move. I knew this was a possibility. Not even that—I knew it was a damn near certainty I’d see him, but it still shakes me, as if I’m completely unprepared for it.

  Luke shifts his attention from my whore of a cousin, who just so happens to be hanging all over him, to me, and then to Tyler. He stands, leaving Leah on the log, and walks straight to us.

  “What’s going on?” Tyler asks, unaware of the man who is quickly approaching us from behind him.

  Before I can respond, Tyler turns around and comes face to face with him, keeping a tight hold on my hand. He looks back at me. “You know this guy?”

  I look at both men, unsure if I should use straight honesty with this situation or not. I choose to stick with the vague truth.

  “Yeah,” I answer after one of the longest pauses of my life. I swallow uncomfortably, wishing I still had my beer to help ease down the lump that’s formed in my throat. I keep my eyes on Tyler before continuing. “He’s my brother’s best friend.”

  “Jesus Christ. Are you going to introduce me to your parents next?” He tugs me toward him. “Come on. I wanna get outta here.”

  Luke steps in front of him, raising an eyebrow. “What’s the rush? The party is just getting started.”

  “Luke,” I warn, gaining his attention fleetingly. “Mind your own business.”

  “Like you mind yours?” he asks, already having returned his attention to Tyler. They’re both similar in size, but the intimidation Luke has radiating off him right now is enough to make a bigger man recoil. Tyler doesn’t falter as Luke steps closer, and I’m not sure if that’s a good thing, or a bad thing.

  “No priors. No traffic citations. Not even a fucking parking ticket. I’m gonna be honest, that shit doesn’t sit well with me.”

  “What the fuck are you talking about?” Tyler asks.

  I suddenly feel dizzy as I realize why Luke knows that information. Either Ben told him after he searched for the bogus name I gave him, or Luke did some research of his own. And this interrogation could easily ruin my chances with Tyler, especially if he finds out he has two cops investigating him.

  So I act fast, stepping in between the two of them with my back to Luke. “Can you just give me a minute with him?” I ask Tyler, trying to sound irritated instead of panicked.

  A deep crease sets in his forehead as he frowns before stepping back. “Whatever. Make it fast.”

  I turn and grab Luke by the arm, pulling him several feet away until Tyler is out of earshot. I spot Leah, fixated on us from her log, and that aggravates me further. He’s concerned about me, but only after he locks down a pussy for the evening. Good to know his priorities are in check.

  “You need to back off. I am leaving with this guy and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

  He looks down at me, arrogant smirk in place. “There’s a lot I can do about it.”

  I take several deep breaths through my nose as I try and keep myself from losing it completely. But I’m right there. I’m always right there with Luke; on the edge of an emotion I don’t want to feel.

  “What I’m about to do, and who I do it with, is none of your business. I don’t need to explain myself to you, my brother, Reed—nobody! So go back to my desperate looking cousin, and stop acting like you actually care.”

  Tyler catches our attention as he comes up to my side, grabbing my hand and pulling me in the direction of the cars. “Time’s up. We’re going.”

  Luke grabs my elbow and puts himself between Tyler and me, getting up in the other man’s face. “You’re going. She stays with me.”

  I see red, tearing myself free of both of them and shoving my hands against Luke’s chest. I push against him as hard as I can, meeting his resistan
ce. “Stop it! God, just leave me alone!”

  He drops his head until I feel his breath against my face. “Don’t do something stupid right now.”

  “Why not? I’m so good at doing shit I end up regretting.” I motion at him with a sweeping hand. “Case in point.”

  “You’re a fucking brat.”

  “And you’re ruining my life!” My voice breaks at the end of my response as I step closer to that familiar edge, fighting back my tears. I drop my head, concealing how he affects me. Please, don’t lose it right now.

  “Yeah?” he questions, prompting me to lift my gaze. “Well, now you know what it feels like.” He steps back, keeping his eyes on me. “Ruin your own life, Tessa. Do whatever you want. I don’t give a shit, and soon, I won’t even have to watch.” He turns then, not giving either one of us another look before he walks away toward the parking area.

  The air leaves my lungs in a loud rush.

  “What a fucking loser. And what was with the parking ticket stuff?” Tyler asks next to me.

  I decide against giving him any information on that and dismiss his questioning with a shrug.

  He grabs my hand again. “Let’s go, before you introduce me to anyone else.”

  I watch Luke fade in between the vehicles ahead of us as we walk away from the crowd, following his direction. You’re ruining my life. That’s funny. I wanted to say, “You’ve ruined my life”, but I think deep down I know there isn’t an end to this torture in sight. Not when he acts like that around me.

  Protective.

  Caring.

  Like I actually mean something to him.

  “Where are you parked?”

  I glance up at Tyler, not having realized we’d reached the parking area. I force a smile and point down the row of cars. “Right over there. I’m the silver RAV4.” I drop my hand and look up at him. “Where do you wanna go?”

  “Your place,” he states, his voice clear. “That’s what we both want, right?”

  Yes.