Redemption Duet (Aces High MC - Cedar Falls Book 0)

by Christine Michelle

  I climbed the stairs to the master suite and glanced around at the unmade bed, the few pieces of clothing strewn about still. My sister had trouble deciding what to wear again and never bothered to clean up before they left. It was typical of her, and seeing that remnant of her personality was like drilling a spike right through my damn heart. Jesus. I took a breath, and another before I found myself sitting on the edge of her bed crying for their loss all over again. “I’m so fucking sorry, Sis.”

  I gave myself a few minutes to give in to the grief I was feeling and to mourn two of the most beloved people in my life. Then I hauled myself up off of their bed and moved to the closet where his clothes hung on the left side and hers were on the right. It smelled like a mixture of the two of them in there and knocked me back once more. I could close my eyes, inhale, and it was as if they were standing there with me.

  “You can do this,” I could hear my sister telling me in her sweet, encouraging voice.

  “Take care of my boy,” Bender’s voice seemed real as the deep baritone resonated through me. I’d swear they were really there talking to me, even though I knew it was all in my own head.

  “I will not let you down,” I promised them both as I grabbed some clothes I thought they’d want to wear to their own send-off and got the hell out of there before I decided to never leave the comfort of their imagined embrace.

  My next stop was Brantley’s room across the hall. I took an old diaper bag out of the closet and started filling it with some of his clothes, a few of his favorite toys, and bath time stuff before I called it good.

  Two days later, I was on my way to the graveside service for both Bender and my sister when I remembered our mother’s necklace. I turned around and headed in the other direction to Sophie’s house in order to retrieve it, because I wanted it to go with Sophie so she and mom could be together in death in some way. It was probably stupid, but I couldn’t get it out of my mind, so I followed my gut. I was about to call Poppy and tell her I’d be running a little late and ask her to meet me there, but my cell was dead. I knew it wasn’t fair, me leaving Brantley with her all this time while I was out trying to run down leads, but I couldn’t stop or I’d think and fall apart. All I had to keep me sane was diving headfirst into anything that kept me too busy to think about what today meant for my family.

  It took me far too long to find where Sophie had the damn necklace hiding. Once I found it and looked at the clock on her wall, I realized I might be cutting it close just getting to the cemetery on time. I’d never hear the end of it from Kent if that happened so I tried to haul my ass there quickly.

  As if someone out there in the cosmos was trying to fuck with me, I heard my name called the minute I parked my bike. I ignored it and started walking at a brisk pace toward the area where I could see everyone gathered. I was nearly there, just on the outskirts of the mourners who had gathered when a manicured set of nails wound around my upper arm and pulled tightly, forcing me to stop where I was by a tree.

  “What the fuck?”

  “Oh God! Smoke, I’m so sorry about Soph.” It hit me then, the sickeningly sweet smell of her perfume.

  “Julie?” I questioned just as she managed to latch onto me like a suckerfish. It was an apt description too, because I had zero doubts that she was going to try to use my sister’s death and my grief as a way to get her foot back in the door with me. She was dead fucking wrong about that. I reached up and attempted to prise her off of me, but I had my mother’s necklace clasped tightly in the one hand, and didn’t want to drop it so my efforts were hampered a bit. The more I tried to get her off of me the harder she would cling. I was nearing the point of losing my fucking mind with her when I heard Brantley call out to me.

  “Unc Moke!” My attention snapped directly to him, and the person carrying him, in time to see the weary look on her face. Shit. Just fucking great. I couldn’t even come to grieve my family’s deaths and say goodbye without Julie causing a scene and fucking shit up with the woman I had been neglecting. It would be my luck Poppy would think Julie had been where I was spending all of my time away from her and Brant. It didn’t help matters that everyone else was now watching too as Chief walked over to Poppy and whispered something to her before tossing a glare back at me over his shoulder.

  “Let the fuck go, now!” I demanded of Julie. I don’t know if she heard the threat in my voice or not, but she let go and looked up at me with wide, innocent eyes.

  “Smoke, I just want to be here for you.”

  “Yeah? If that were the case, you wouldn’t have just caused a fuckin’ scene at my sister’s funeral. Now, get the fuck off of me!” I told her again. She had eased off of her hold before, but her fingers still clung to the front of my kutte as if she were holding on to a lifeline. She no longer had access to that shit, and I wasn’t playing games with her thinking that she could just waltz back into my life.

  “Poppy!” I called as I started moving towards where she was headed. I was confused at first, because it looked like she was trying to leave the funeral with Brant. That wasn’t fucking right. He should be here to say goodbye to his mom and dad.

  She managed to get all the way to her car before I caught up and grabbed hold of her elbow to keep her from getting herself or Brant inside.

  “You might want to back off a minute, Brother,” Chief demanded.

  “Seriously?” I asked, taken aback by the order coming from my club brother.

  “Seriously,” Chief answered as he maneuvered me back a bit so Poppy could get my nephew strapped into his car seat in her car.

  “What’s going on?”

  Chief stood back as Poppy finished and then turned to me looking ready for a fight. “I’m taking Brant home, because he’s tired, and I think he’s had enough today. I’ve been answering questions all day for him about why we were saying goodbye to the boxes when his mom and dad are in heaven. Why can’t we go to heaven to see them? Why can’t they come visit? Why didn’t they take him with them? It’s been nonstop. Frankly, I’m not even sure I’m telling him the right things, but you haven’t been around to ask. Kent is angry with me for some reason and won’t speak to me. You’ve been God knows where with Lord only knows who, and I just can’t help thinking I’m the last person your sister would have wanted answering these questions for her son. She only met me the one time, and she didn’t have a high opinion of me for at least half of that time.” She blew out a sharp breath once she was through speaking and stood there staring back and forth between myself and Chief.

  “You look tired,” Chief’s soft words for his sister made me take notice of the dark circles under her eyes. “I’ll come back with you and watch Brant so you can get a nap, okay?”

  “There’s no need for that. I was planning on heading out with them when they went,” I responded to Chief before she could.

  “Really? Up until they spotted you with your ex hanging all over you, Poppy wasn’t even aware you had shown up for the funeral. She didn’t know if she’d see you there at all before she left. I get that you have a lot going on right now, man, but that kid ain’t hers. It isn’t her responsibility to do all the tough stuff with him, and have you come in once the dust has settled and finally decide that you have time for him. My sister isn’t your damn nanny, and you need to remember that. She’s already had one man treat her like she was only good for keeping his house when he wanted to be there. She doesn’t need a repeat performance with extra responsibilities thrown in for fun.”

  “Jesus, Chief!” I ground out, raising my voice a little more than I wanted to. “You know where I’ve been! I’ve been hunting down the maniacs who took my fucking sister. You’d be doing the same goddamn thing!” I took a step back, trying to shake off the anger I was feeling in the moment before I continued on. “Look, I don’t know how to do this. He’s my nephew, and I’ve watched him before, but I’ve never had to prioritize him before like this. I don’t know what to do here, because I can’t let Soph and Bender’s deaths go
unanswered. I can’t exactly take Brant with me when I do those things. I’ll find someone else who can help with him for the time being if it’s a problem. I didn’t mean to put the burden on Poppy.” I turned to her, to make sure she knew I meant what I was saying. “I didn’t mean to leave you holding my family’s bag, I swear.”

  “Brant is not a burden. Not knowing what you expect me to say to him or do with him is though. I can’t be the one making the decision about what to tell him about his parents, or how to cope, or God, any of it. I can’t because I didn’t know how to do those things for myself when I lost my family and I was an adult.”

  “Plus, she hasn’t been feeling well. Not that she’d tell anyone and admit she’s not perfect,” Chief informed me, and I felt my stomach drop.

  “What?” Poppy huffed out in a shrill tone as she stared daggers at her brother.

  “Saw you get sick this morning,” he told her while looking her over as if he could see inside of her and all of her secrets were suddenly clear to him.

  “Probably just something I ate,” she managed to spit back out at him.

  “You were sick?” I tried to clarify as I took in her less than stellar pallor and again, those darkened circles. I had thought she was just tired, but I supposed they’d be there if she was sick too.

  “Yeah, something you may have noticed if you’d even checked in with her for more than two minutes a day,” Chief stated, not leaving out the disdain he felt as it dripped from his words to my ears.

  “Shit,” I huffed. “How about we get you guys home, and then we’ll figure everything out where you can relax?” Poppy didn’t answer, instead I watched as her attention shifted beyond where we were all standing by her car to someone not too far off. It took a moment for me to track her field of vision and then put two and two together with what she was seeing. “No,” I told her as I pointed to her car. “Get in, drive home, and I’ll meet you there.” We were not going to focus on Julie, or the fact that she’d been standing there watching us. She wasn’t even on my radar before and I wouldn’t waste a moment more thinking of her. All I wanted was to get Poppy and Brant home and just be at peace with them.

  On my way to my bike to follow them, I texted her to meet me at her own house. I wanted to stay there with my woman and my nephew away from the prying eyes of the club for a little bit. I needed some normalcy without the pity-laced looks being thrown at me, or worse, the concerned looks from those who were wondering when I was going to flip my shit and forget the need to be discrete while seeking my vengeance.

  When I got to the house and she didn’t answer the door right away, I moved to go through the gate on the side of the house in order to get into the backyard. “Figured you were out here when you didn’t answer.”

  “What if I just wasn’t up for company and ignoring you?”

  I could tell by her response that she had been dwelling on the scene she’d witnessed with Julie’s suckerfish impersonation, so I didn’t bother to wait to clarify that. “I haven’t seen or spoken to Julie in six months until this morning. She heard about Soph and showed up, caught up to me as I heading to the,” once again I found that the word just wouldn’t leave my throat. It was stuck there again. “What you saw wasn’t…”

  Poppy threw her hands up in the air to wave away what I’d been about to say. “Stop. It doesn’t matter, because the only reason I entertained doubts was because of your behavior over the past few days. Had you been around at all, helping with Brantley, I would have never thought…” Shit! My whole body slumped in on itself with her words. She was right. I had done this. By not being present in their lives, I had given her reason to doubt.

  “I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t sit still. In the brief minutes when I do, everything is real and she’s never coming back. She was my little sister, but I raised her too. After my dad left, when my mom had to work so much, it was me looking after them. They’re like my kids in a way, and now,” I swallowed down the emotion that was clogging my ability to speak. “She’s gone and Kent won’t speak to me, because he thinks it’s my fault. I don’t know what to do with all that.”

  “I understand. I really, honestly do understand what you’re going through. That doesn’t make it easier when I have a past that clouds everything in muck. I know that shouldn’t fall on you, but I can’t help the way I feel or that I’m questioning everything now, because I didn’t question enough before.”

  I stepped closer to her and reached out to pull her to me. “I’m sorry, Poppy.” I clung to her, inhaling her familiar scent, taking comfort in her presence, and then I felt it all over again. That desperate ache where my vibrant sister used to fill the space with happiness. The spot in my heart where Bender used to tell his ridiculous jokes and make me laugh. Those spots I didn’t think would ever feel full again threatened to drown me as my body shook with the effort to hold off the grief a little longer. Inhale – the subtle, sweet vanilla scent that lingered around Poppy. Exhale – all the memories that were threatening to pull me under. It took a few minutes before I was able to pull it together, and she must have sensed the shift, because she waited until that moment to speak.

  “Will they come for us too?”

  “No!” I answered on instinct. “I’ve had Gray watching out for you two.”

  “Surfer-dude?”

  I grinned at her. “Yeah, surfer-dude. He’s been watching the house when I haven’t been here.”

  “I haven’t seen a bike out there the past few days.”

  “That’s because he’s been incognito in a fucking cage. Listen, Poppy, I know what you were thinking and I just need you to understand that you weren’t forgotten. You haven’t been far from my mind, in fact, I’ve been gone so much to make sure you don’t end up like Soph. I want you and Brant safe even if that means I can’t be here while I’m hunting for the assholes who destroyed my family.”

  Chapter 10

  Poppy seemed far more exhausted than I had given her credit for at the cemetery. By the time we got home she could barely keep her eyes open and I did my best to convince her just to go take a nap. I thought she would just go down for a quick nap, but when I called her for dinner and she didn’t even stir, I figured she needed the break more than I thought so I let her be.

  “Is Popwee otay?” Brant asked while we were eating some pizza for dinner.

  “She’s okay, little man, just tired.”

  “Popwee is sick. She frowned up.”

  “I know. Chief told me.”

  “Teef is Popwee’s brudder like you mommy’s brudder?”

  “Yeah,” I managed to get out before I had to turn away and pull myself together. “Chief is Poppy’s brother.”

  “I miss my mommy,” Brant spoke softly into the last of his pizza slice. I scooted him over from his booster seat onto my lap and we sat like that for a bit.

  “I miss her too, little man. Every day,” I stated solemnly, staving off another wave of overwhelming sadness. “What do you say we get you a bubble bath set up? I brought some of your toys from the house. You can pick two to take in the tub with you.”

  “Otay,” he mumbled as his head continued to lie there on my chest. I knew then that missing his parents was getting to him more than he realized. The kid normally loved bubble baths more than any woman I’d ever met.

  “Do you want to just sit here with me for a little while instead?”

  His little hands fisted in the cotton of my t-shirt and pulled tight while I felt the tell-tale wetness from his tears. I ran my hand up and down his back and let him have his moment. I sat there rocking his little body against me for the longest time before I realized the wetness I was feeling on my shirt was no longer tears, but little boy drool. I carried him to the second bedroom that Poppy had managed to transform into a little boy’s spot without me noticing over the past couple of days. I don’t know how she managed to find the time, and I had a sneaking suspicion some of the old ladies must have helped out. It squeezed at my heart just a little bit more.
I’d practically dumped my nephew in her lap, and she didn’t complain about it. Instead, she made a home for him to fall into so he wouldn’t feel so out of place.

  Once I tucked his little body into bed, I turned and made sure the nightlight was on and watched as Bubba curled up beside the bed with his back to the bed and face toward the door. “Good boy, Bubba. You watch over my boy.” Bubba snuffled as if to say, “Duh,” to me and rested his snout on his paws. I moved through the house locking up, cleaning our mess, and then made my way to the other bedroom. Poppy was still knocked out and I didn’t want to disturb her after all the shit I’d put off on her over the past week. Instead, I undressed down to my boxer briefs, crawled in beside her, and pulled her tight to my body.

  Her sweet scent and warmth lulled me to sleep quickly, and it was the first peaceful night I’d spent since I left her in Pittsburgh with my brother. The fucking night where everything fell apart. I knew I would be distracted even more over the coming days as we started to get more intel on the bastards behind the barn explosions and my sister’s death. It made me hold on tighter to the woman in my arms, because the bad shit wasn’t behind us yet – not by a long shot.

  I heard both Brant and Bubba stirring, and Poppy was still dead to the world, so I got up to go check on them and let Bubba out into the backyard. Once he did his business, I set about making Brant breakfast since I hadn’t been around to do the little things with him since his release from the hospital. His bruised face was already starting to change colors with some shades of ugly yellow, green, and the deeper purples still lurking near the center of his wounds. He’d been lucky that he was still so small.