by T. J. Klune
Randall closed his eyes and took in a shuddering breath. “So he’s here. He’s finally here. Returned from the shadow realm.” He opened his eyes to look at Mama, Feng, and Letnia. “He has returned to Verania. There is a prophecy. Spoken by the star dragon. That a darkness would rise and that a counterpart would follow in opposition.” He jerked his head toward me. “Meet the counterpart.”
Feng, Letnia, and Mama all turned to look at me, eyes narrowed.
“Heeeyyy,” I said, suddenly very uncomfortable. I waved awkwardly at what were undoubtedly three of the most powerful people in Verania. “Fun, right? I know I’m having fun.”
Feng shifted, eyes darting around the room. He seemed to focus on oddly specific things, a book on a side table, a vase, the ceiling fan. I didn’t know him well enough to say what he could possibly be doing, but it struck me as strange.
“But how is that possible?” Mama asked Randall.
“Um, because the star dragon said so?” I retorted. “And also, excuse you. I’ll have you know that it’s very possible that there could be a prophecy about me.”
She rolled her perfectly made-up eyes. “I wasn’t talking about that, precious. And I am well aware of your worth. Now shut up and let me speak.”
“That’s what we’re here for,” Randall said. “Because it shouldn’t have been possible.”
The room took on a heavier feel due to Randall’s tone—one I’d never heard before. I’d known Randall to be sad and to be angry. Exasperated or bemused, usually directed toward me. And there were times, though few and far between, that I’d seen him happy. It always seemed to be around Morgan, and that made sense. They’d known each other for centuries. They’d been through so much together. I knew Randall loved Morgan, even if I’d never heard him say as much.
But this?
This was different.
There was more power emanating from him than I’d ever felt. The few people who didn’t know who Randall was upon first sight were quick to dismiss him as a haggard, decrepit old man. But those few people quickly changed their tune the moment his name was uttered, looking upon him with a healthy dose of awe and fear. There had never been one like Randall before. I doubted there would ever be one like him again. He was the wizard, and regardless of what people thought about me, regardless of what Morgan and Randall thought I could become, he was still the most powerful magic user in the known world. He had centuries on me, and since I didn’t plan on living that long, I doubted I would ever be on his level.
Still didn’t mean I wouldn’t give him shit. He was an asshole. I was a dick. It was pretty much my job to fuck with him.
But I wouldn’t do it right now, because the hairs were standing up on the back of my neck, and I felt magic drawing around us. And even though only Morgan and myself could feel it, the others knew something had shifted. Randall was standing a little taller, his shoulders squared. Sure, he was wearing magenta robes and an orange hat that clashed horribly and made it feel like my eyes were being assaulted by a man named Primary Colors, and yes, his beard was scraggly because it looked as if all the hairs had migrated to his ears and/or eyebrows, but holy fuck. If they could feel even only a fraction of what I could, then they would know shit was about to hit the fan.
And I had no idea why.
But it seemed three others in the room did, if the looks on their faces meant anything.
Mama.
Feng.
Letnia.
“I went to the seal,” Randall said. “In the Dark Woods. I thought it safeguarded, but—no matter. It’d been broken, and deliberately so. But not so much split down the middle as having a little piece chipped off. Enough to allow a shadow to leak through, if it was strong enough. And it was done in such a way that it would have been hidden from me.”
“Surely you don’t think—” Letnia started as she placed her cigar in an ashtray on Mama’s desk, the smoke curling up, the embers burning bright.
“Your families were chosen,” Randall interrupted, “because of their strength and power. Because of how deep their blood ran through the veins of Verania. Your great-great-grandparents were tasked with guarding the keys to the seal. They were split because no one person should have ever had the power to break it open. It was locked for a reason.”
“What the hell is going on?” Ryan whispered to me.
I shook my head, because once again, I wasn’t sure. Yet another thing that had been kept from me. I glanced at Morgan, but his eyes were trained on Randall, like he was analyzing every word. But I knew my mentor almost better than anyone. Something was happening, and he was preparing himself. I felt the colors of his magic rolling through mine, the green and gold mixing with the red and violet hues that always seemed to be around him.
“Surely you don’t think that one of us would betray you, do you?” Mama asked, eyes wide. “Randall, we would never—”
“Someone did,” Randall said sharply. “And now Sam has paid the price for that mistake.”
“Um,” I said. “I’m totally okay to be left out of this argument. Whatever this is.”
“Tell him,” Randall said. “Tell him what your families were chosen to do.”
At first no one said anything, and I didn’t think I’d ever been in a more uncomfortable situation. Then Mama said, “After Myrin was banished to the realm of shadows, it was decided that the keys to the seal were too much for one person to have.” She started clicking her nails on the surface of the desk. “If there was ever a resurgence, if the Darks ever tried to bring Myrin back, it’d be far too easy to get the keys if they were all in one place, even if it was one such as Randall who held them. So they were dispersed to three families in Verania, families whose names carried weight, even if it wasn’t necessarily for the right reason.” She smiled ruefully at me. “After all, who could ever believe such a treasure could be given to those who made their money peddling flesh or drugs or weapons.”
“So it was passed down,” I said slowly. “From generation to generation.”
Mama nodded. “Our biggest treasure, our greatest secret. We are the protectors of the keys to the seal where Myrin had been trapped. At first our families were spread out across Verania, but eventually we found ourselves here, in Meridian City. Randall wasn’t pleased by the idea of all of us in one place, but Meridian City has a tendency to become a… distraction from everything important. It was hiding in plain sight. Not that we had anything to hide from. No one had ever come for the keys since they were given to us. Not once. It was almost easy to forget that we had them at all.”
“And now that Sam has confirmed Myrin has risen, that means that one of you has betrayed me,” Randall said, effectively sucking any and all fun out of the room.
“Whoa,” I breathed. “Dude. Heavy.”
“I take umbrage at your tone,” Letnia snapped. “We have done our duty, as our parents did, and their parents before them. We would no more betray you than—”
“Show me the keys,” Randall said.
“Far out,” I whispered fervently. “It’s like a standoff right now! Gary is going to be so pissed he’s not here to see this.”
Morgan smacked me upside the head. “This is serious.”
“I know,” I said, rubbing the back of my head. “That’s why Gary should see this. Can we maybe pause right here and wait until I get him and pick up where you left off?”
Randall stared at me.
“Or not,” I said hastily. “Not is good too. You have my permission to continue on as you were.”
“Your keys,” Randall said again as he turned back toward the others. “Show them to me.” His tone brooked no argument, and if it had been anyone other than Randall, I would have thought it badass.
Mama sighed and stood from her desk. She turned to the wall behind her, where there was a painting of a male courtesan draped seductively on a bed wearing nothing but a dreamy, wicked smile. I choked as she reached up and stroked the length of his painted cock, only to hear a click and a whirring sound, as if
gears had started turning.
Then the painting slid to the side, revealing a safe.
“Are you telling me that in order to get to a key that locks the seal to the shadow realm, you have to touch a dick?” I demanded.
“Would you expect anything different from me?”
I thought about it for a second. “No. Actually, that seems about right. Way to stay true to character.”
She twisted the knob on the safe left, left, then right, right, right before pulling on the handle. The door to the safe creaked open, and I could see bundles of paper inside and stacks of gold and coin. She rummaged around, muttering to herself, before saying, “Aha, there you are, you little bastard.” She turned back around and laid the key on the table.
And I was disappointed to see it was exactly that. A key. Like, a regular door key, thick and heavy. Sure, it looked older than fuck, but it was just… normal.
“Huh,” I said. “That was slightly anticlimactic. I really need to learn not to get my hopes up in situations like this. My disappointment is palpable. Like, I can literally taste the disappointment.”
“What did you think it was going to be?” Morgan asked, sounding amused.
I shrugged. “I dunno. Not that. I mean, it’s for a seal to the shadow realm. I at least thought it would be glowing. And shaped like a dragon’s fang. And maybe have jewels set on it. And be inlaid with gold. Most likely priceless.”
“Because of course you did,” Morgan said.
“That’s okay,” I assured him. “I’m used to having my imagination stifled, so. No big deal.”
“The other two, if you please,” Randall said to Letnia and Feng.
Letnia frowned at him, and I thought for a moment that she’d refuse. Which honestly almost made me feel a little bit better, because the thought of Mama being the betrayer curdled my stomach something fierce. I didn’t know what I’d do if she turned out to be evil. All those talks we’d had in the past would have suddenly become her monologuing at me, and even though she was the fiercest drag queen I’d ever met in my life, I would still need to kick her ass for it, something I really wasn’t looking forward to. I didn’t want to get stabbed with a pair of stilettos.
But then Letnia sighed and reached for a string that hung around her neck. She pulled it up and over her head, and a key came out attached to it. She laid it on the desk next to Mama’s. It was similar, maybe a little bit darker, and maybe a little bit more flecked with rust. But it too was just a regular-looking key, and this was probably the worst reveal in the history of all reveals.
I told myself that when I became the King’s Wizard, all my shit would be so much cooler than this. I would never become lame like them. Key to a shadow seal? That shit’s going to be made of motherfucking crystals and require incantations.
I was going to be so awesome.
I sighed forlornly as I stared down at the keys.
“He’s tasting his disappointment again,” Morgan told Randall.
“Kids these days,” Randall scoffed. “If it’s not bright and shiny for their tiny little brains, then they fail to comprehend.”
I couldn’t even argue with that.
“Feng?” Morgan said. “If you would, please. The sooner we deal with this, the better it will be. And then we can—”
“Well,” Feng said. “You zay dat’s vhat you vant. But I can’t do dat.”
I looked up slowly.
Feng stood on the opposite side of the desk. His coat was now open, and strapped to his waist and chest were what appeared to be tiny wooden spheres, dangling down and swaying back and forth as he moved.
In one hand he held Letnia’s discarded cigar, the end glowing brightly.
In his other, he held Justin by the throat.
My vision tunneled, focusing on the fingers around the Prince’s neck, cataloging every indentation of skin, every shift of Feng’s thumb. My job, my one job above all others, was to keep the King and the Prince safe. It was the one lesson that had been stressed to me over and over again. The Castle Guard would lay down their lives for the Crown if the threat should call for it, but it was the Wizard’s job to lay waste to any threat to begin with.
I started forward, but Morgan put his hand on my shoulder, squeezing so tightly that it stung against the lightning-tree scar. I knew he didn’t mean to hurt me, but it parted the red sheen of rage that had fallen over my eyes.
Ryan stood next to me, bouncing on his feet slowly, hands up in front of him in fists, ready to move when signaled.
Letnia stood where she had before, jaw dropped, confusion on her face.
Mama looked more furious than I’d ever seen her.
And Randall?
Randall said, “You’re making a mistake.”
And he said it with such ease.
Feng laughed. “A miztake? I tink not. I tink you’ll find it iz you who iz miztaken, old wizzzard. Now, I know yer magic iz… large. But you zee dees tings on me? Dey are filled with a concoction of my own making. Quite… explosive. Dere would be nothing left of the Prince. Or any of you.”
“I’m totally going to save you,” I told Justin, hopefully to calm him down if he was freaking out. “You don’t even have to worry. I got you, dude.”
“Somehow, that’s not as comforting as you think it is,” Justin said through gritted teeth.
“You motherfucking cocksucker!” Mama bellowed at him, causing Feng to take a step back. “Are you fucking serious? I’m going to tear you apart piece by piece, and just when you’re gagging on your own blood, I’m going to rip your dick off and shove it down your throat!”
“Holy violence,” I whispered in awe. “That was graphic.”
“How did you think this was going to end?” Randall asked, as if he had all the time in the world. “What did you think you were going to accomplish here?”
Feng grinned. The gold teeth flashed. “Got you all in one room, didn’t I?”
“It’s a mothercracking trap,” Ryan growled, and I was so proud of him for controlling his language in this dire time. It was the mark of a true knight. I needed to fuck him nice and hard later if we made it out of this alive. Positive reinforcement and all that.
“Your key is gone?” Randall asked.
“Crumbled against da lock,” Feng agreed. “Not enough to open, but enough to crack. Myrin did da rest. Iz time for da Darks. Offers were made. Here iz how this will work. I leave with da Prince. Any move made and he will die before you blink.”
He began to edge his way toward the door.
“Feng,” Letnia said. “You are making a mistake. Do you not see the people in this room? In what world do you see yourself coming out alive at the end of this? And even if it was just Mama and myself, you had to have known we would destroy you.”
“Dere are tings far greater than I,” Feng said. “But he will reward me. And it will be glorious.”
“This is why the Darks gathered,” Morgan said. “Because you were supposed to bring the Prince? But you couldn’t have known we would bring him with us to Meridian City. How could you—”
“It was meant to be the boy wizard,” Feng said, shooting me a look. “Thought dere would be more time, but you asked about da keys already. This is improvising. A prince in da place of a wizard? Seems fair to me.”
“What did he want with Sam?” Ryan snapped at him as we turned with every step Feng took toward the door.
Feng shrugged. “Not my concern. Dis is as good as it gets. Prince, open da door.”
“Fuck your face,” Justin snarled.
“Maybe later,” Feng said. “If dere iz time.”
Justin struggled against him, but Feng squeezed his throat even harder, and I knew if we got out of all this, there’d be bruises in the shape of a handprint around his neck.
And that, well.
That pissed me off.
“Justin, do it,” I said, struggling to keep my voice even. “Open the door. It won’t matter, because he’s not going to get very far. You can trust
me on that.”
“Dat so?” Feng eyed me up and down. “You tink you can stop me?”
I grinned at him, wicked sharp. “Oh, I know I can. You know what your problem is? And it’s funny, because it’s a common one, so don’t blame yourself too much for it. But you’ve underestimated me. That was a big mistake, and probably your last.”
And there was a flicker of something akin to fear in his eyes that warmed me greatly. It also helped that no one would be able to argue later how badass I sounded. If only my clothes were billowing, this moment would have been perfect.
“If you get me killed, Sam,” Justin said, “I’m going to haunt you for the rest of your miserably short life, I swear to the gods.”
“Good,” I said. “Because we’re best friends 5eva. I wouldn’t expect any less from you. I am so happy you realized that now, right at this moment. I’ll never let you forget it.”
“I hate you so much.”
“Nah. You’re just being held captive by a villain who was stupid enough to take you in front of three wizards, a knight commander, an angry drag queen, and a lady with a glittery eye patch. You’re going to be just fine.”
A pause. Then, “Yeah. Hearing that makes me realize I should have stayed at the castle.”
“Nah, it’s good for you to get out every now and then. Remember how it was before you were kidnapped? You were such an asshole. Now look at you. Having adventures and getting captured. It’s almost like we’re the same person!”
“Oh gods,” Justin moaned. “Maybe I should just go with Feng. At least I wouldn’t have to worry about being like Sam of Wilds for very much longer.”
“Your mouth is saying no,” I told him solemnly. “But your heart is saying yes.”
“Enough,” Feng growled. “Open. Da. Door.”
Justin glanced at me one last time.
I nodded at him.
He sighed… and reached for the doorknob.
I had to think of a plan. I couldn’t let him get out of the Tilted Cross with Justin still his prisoner. I didn’t know who was waiting for Feng outside the brothel, ready to spirit them away the moment they stepped out into the sunlight. Granted, he first needed to make it down the hall, then down the stairs, and to the front door before that happened.