No Place for an Angel

by Gail Whitiker

  The hackney drew to a halt in front of her house. Catherine stepped down and paid the driver, then pulled out her key. She was almost at her door when another carriage came around the corner and drew to a halt in front of the house next to hers. A moment later, the door opened and a middle-aged man got out, wearing a tweed jacket over light-coloured breeches tucked into polished brown boots. In his hand was a piece of parchment and on his face, an expression of frustration.

  ‘Excuse me, I wonder if you could help me,’ he said, walking towards her. ‘I am new to London and looking for a gentleman who supposedly resides on this street.’ He glanced at the parchment again. ‘A Mr Howard. Do you know him?’

  Catherine shook her head. ‘I’m sorry. I do not. Have you no house number?’

  ‘I’m not sure. A friend gave me the directions before I left Brighton, but I’m having trouble reading them.’ He smiled ruefully and stepped a little closer. ‘I must have left my spectacles at home.’ He held the parchment out to her. ‘Can you see a house number written down anywhere?’

  Catherine took a quick look and saw a lot of very small writing. ‘I don’t know.’ She bent to have a closer look. ‘Yes, there it is. Mr Howard at...I think it says number twenty-five, but the writing is very— Wait! What are you doing?’

  The man, who seemed to have lost all interest in the paper, had grabbed her by the arm and was pushing her towards the carriage.

  ‘Stop!’ Catherine shouted. ‘What do you think you’re doing?’

  ‘Taking you for a ride,’ the man said, all trace of amiability gone.

  ‘How dare you! Get away from me!’

  ‘Oh, no, my virgin angel, I have no intention of going away. In fact, I plan on getting very close indeed.’ With that, he gripped her around the waist and all but lifted her off her feet as he tried to shove her into the carriage.

  Thankfully, Catherine remembered her training. She let herself go completely limp, and when he loosened his arms to get a better grip, she twisted around and lifted her knee straight into his groin.

  The unexpected move had the desired effect. He dropped her at once and doubled over in pain. ‘‘You little bitch! I’ll make you pay for that.’

  ‘Not tonight you won’t!’ Catherine hissed, running for the door.

  Thankfully, Mrs Rankin must have heard her shouts and was holding it open. ‘Dear Lord, are you all right?’

  ‘I’m fine.’ Catherine shut the door and locked it behind her.

  ‘What happened? I heard you shout—’

  ‘We’ll talk about it in the morning,’ Catherine said, unsure if she was trembling as a result of anger or fear. ‘Right now I need a brandy.’

  ‘I’ll bring one right up.’ Mrs Rankin pushed her gently towards the stairs. ‘You go up and get ready for bed. Are you sure you’re not hurt?’

  Catherine closed her eyes and took a long, deep breath. ‘I’m fine.’ But she wouldn’t have been had she not been able to incapacitate her attacker. The man had clearly intended to push her into the carriage and then take her God knew where for only God knew what purpose. Although, judging from what he’d said, she had a pretty good idea what he’d had in mind.

  Had this something to do with the wager Valbourg had warned her about? Her attacker had obviously planned an elaborate ruse to catch her off guard and had waited for the right moment to spring. But having done so and been foiled, he would no doubt be angry; doubly so because she had dealt him an injury. He wouldn’t forget that any time soon and Catherine knew she would have to be on the lookout for him.

  The stakes had just doubled. Like it or not, the safety and well-being of both her and her son were now at risk.

  * * *

  In the weeks that followed, Catherine existed in a constant state of anxiety. She had no idea if the man who’d accosted her would try again, but she was constantly on the lookout for late-night carriages or dark strangers lurking on her street. She also kept a close watch on Thomas, still fearful that Reverend Hailey or one of his men would appear at her door and try to take him away. She refused to believe Valbourg’s assurances that the clergyman must have simply accepted what had happened and moved on.

  ‘He was so adamant I wasn’t going to have Thomas,’ Catherine said as she and Valbourg sat on the grass together under the shade of a large oak tree one sunny afternoon. ‘I can’t understand how he would let this go without any kind of retaliation.’

  They had driven out to the country with a picnic hamper tucked in the back of the carriage. Catherine had suggested bringing the boys, but Valbourg asked that it be just the two of them because he needed to talk to her about a matter of considerable importance. He assured her his father would look after Thomas and Sebastian while they were gone.

  Selfishly, perhaps, Catherine had agreed, welcoming the opportunity to spend a few hours alone with Valbourg. For whatever reason, he hadn’t been able to spend much time with her of late and she missed him terribly. She had even dispensed with the formality of bringing Mrs Rankin along to act as chaperon. What was the point? As an unwed actress with a child, she had very little modesty left to protect.

  ‘Perhaps Hailey has come to his senses and realised that Thomas belongs with you,’ Valbourg said, biting into a crisp green apple. ‘After all, you are his mother.’

  ‘That didn’t matter to him in the past. I’m sure you remember what he said about my morals and character.’

  ‘People often say things in the heat of the moment, only to regret them later. Hailey probably didn’t like you standing up to him and I expect he liked my doing so even less. But in the end, he must have realised there was nothing he could do.’

  ‘I hope you’re right,’ Catherine said. ‘It would be a relief to have one less thing to worry about.’ The fact she was still a target for that unknown man was a different issue altogether, but one she had kept to herself. Valbourg clearly wasn’t in a position to do anything about it. ‘So, what did you want to talk to me about?’

  Valbourg looked at her and then tossed the apple away. ‘There’s something I have to tell you, Catherine. Something I’ve been putting off, but that I can’t any longer. It’s not fair to either of us.’

  He was deeply troubled. Catherine could see it in his expression. ‘What’s wrong?’

  He reached for her hand and held it tightly. ‘You know I care about you and that I care for you. I would do anything I could to avoid hurting you.’

  ‘I know that. You have been nothing but kind and honest with me since the night we met.’

  He raised her hand to his lips and kissed it, his smile holding more than a trace of sadness.

  ‘I have been...asked to do something I would avoid if I could, but that in all honesty I cannot.’ He gazed down at their intertwined fingers, then up into her eyes. ‘My father is insisting that I marry. I am to announce my engagement by Christmas.’

  ‘Christmas!’

  ‘I’m sorry. This isn’t what either of us want, but I really have no choice.’

  It was the last thing Catherine had expected to hear—and the last thing she wanted to. ‘I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. You are Alderbury’s heir, after all. You had to marry some time.’

  ‘True, but until recently, I hadn’t given the matter any thought. I was happy with my life and content to see it continue along the same lines. But my father isn’t happy and is insisting I marry.’

  ‘I see.’ Catherine stared down at the ground. She would have withdrawn her hand, but Valbourg held on to it. ‘Do you have...anyone in mind?’

  ‘No. The only woman I care about is the only woman I cannot have.’

  She looked up and saw in his eyes all that he felt for her...and it broke her heart. ‘Oh, Richard, what are we going to do?’

  ‘I don’t know. We always knew this was impossible.’

  �
�I know.’ Catherine stared at their hands, wondering how she would ever bear being separated from him. ‘There are too many obstacles.’

  ‘I told myself that as well, but it hasn’t made any difference. I’ve wanted you for so long,’ Valbourg said. ‘Ever since the first time I saw you in the theatre. There was something so wonderfully alive about you. You captivated me then and I’ve only grown more fascinated by you since. But it has to come to an end and I thought it only right that I tell you now. Because it will, naturally, affect the amount of time we are able to spend together. And once I am married—’

  ‘You will have no time to spend with me at all,’ Catherine said, trying to be brave, but also aware that not even her best acting skills were equal to the task. ‘I wish I could say I don’t care or that I won’t miss you, but I will. Terribly. Every day of my life.’

  He drew her into his arms and settled her in the bend of his knees, cradling her against his chest. How long she sat there, Catherine didn’t know. She simply put her arms around his neck and clung to him, staying as close as possible. How was she to live without him? She wanted to be everything to him: friend, lover, wife...but in reality she could play none of those roles. He was destined to marry a woman with a title as lofty as his or at the very least an upbringing as noble. There was simply no place in his life for an actress.

  ‘I’m sorry, Catherine,’ he murmured, his lips pressed against her hair. ‘If there was any other way, I would take it, but it isn’t just my future that’s at stake. I have to consider Sebastian and I hate to think what would happen to him if he were taken away from me. I love him as my own; the way you love Thomas. I don’t know what I would do without him.’

  ‘Hush,’ Catherine said, reaching up and putting a finger to his lips. ‘No one is going to take Sebastian away because you are going to do what you must. You are going to find a nice young lady and ask her to marry you. Then you are going to settle down and start a family of your own so that Sebastian will have brothers and sisters to grow up with.’ Her voice caught. ‘You cannot do anything else, Richard. You know that.’

  He did. She could see it in his eyes. But knowing she was doing and saying the right things made her no happier. She loved him too much for that.

  * * *

  At length, the picnic came to an end. Valbourg was quiet as he packed away the remnants of their meal and folded up the blanket. Though the sun still shone, Catherine felt a chill that had nothing to do with the weather. Everything had changed. He helped her into the carriage and put the horses to a walk, but to her surprise, they did not take the road by which they had come, but instead went deeper into the forest, at length arriving at a charming cottage.

  ‘Where are we?’ Catherine asked as Valbourg jumped down and held out his hands to her. ‘Whose cottage is this?’

  ‘It belongs to a friend of mine who is in India at the moment and who asked me to check on it every now and then. He comes here to paint when he’s not travelling around the world.’ Valbourg pulled a key from his pocket and unlocked the front door.

  Catherine could tell at once that it was the home of an artist. A large easel stood in the centre of the living room and paints and brushes were scattered around the room. A number of half-finished canvases leaned against the walls, lending a general air of creative haphazardness to the cottage.

  She turned around to find Valbourg watching her. ‘It’s delightful, but...why have you brought me here?’

  ‘To give you a choice.’ He walked towards her and took both of her hands in his. ‘My life is going to change in the next few months, Catherine. I won’t be able to see you often, if at all. So while I still have the chance, I want us to be together. But only if that’s what you want, too.’

  It took a moment for Catherine to understand what he was suggesting. When she did, she gazed down at their hands and realised the weight of the decision staring her in the face. He wanted to make love to her...and she wanted it, too. Wanted it with an intensity that made her bones ache and her body heavy. Even now, the blood was pounding in her veins at the thought of lying naked in his arms.

  ‘I do want it,’ she admitted huskily. ‘More than I have any right to. But are you sure it is the right thing to do?’

  ‘No, but neither do I wish to spend the rest of my life wondering what it would have been like to make love to you,’ he said. ‘I will care for the woman I marry, but she will never be you, Catherine. No one will ever be you.’

  It was all he needed to say. The question had been asked...and answered.

  Catherine nodded and smiled as they walked into the bedroom together. She was not in the least afraid and yet she knew full well that what was about to happen would change both of their lives for ever.

  * * *

  In the aftermath of love, they travelled home, closer as a result of what they had shared and united by the power of their feelings for one another. But there was sadness there, too, because now more than ever, they knew what might have been and what they were giving up.

  What had happened today would never be repeated.

  Valbourg reached for her hand and pressed a fervent kiss to the soft skin of her palm. Catherine, whose entire body was still tingling from their lovemaking, felt her heart turn over. How would she get through the long, lonely years knowing he was married to someone else? That he would hold another woman in the darkness and that in her body, he would plant his seed. How was she to live with the knowledge that more than anything, she wanted to be that woman? The one he loved and who would be the mother of his child...

  ‘What are you thinking?’ he murmured against her temple.

  ‘Nothing that serves either of us well.’ Catherine closed her eyes and shook her head. ‘Thank you, Richard. I will never forget this afternoon.’

  ‘Nor, I’m afraid, will I.’

  There were no further declarations. No bemoaning what fate held in store for them. They both knew what was and what wasn’t allowed. Valbourg could fly in the face of convention, but his reputation would suffer for it. He would be shunned by those who mattered; be denied access to the houses of good society and be cut off from those who cared about him. He might even be disinherited. It had been known to happen.

  And she would be castigated for being the cause of his disgrace. They would call her a scheming, manipulative woman who thought only of her own needs. A woman who would bring him down to her level because she loved him and wanted to be with him.

  Catherine refused to do that. She loved him too much. And knowing how deeply the disgrace would affect him gave her the courage to do what needed to be done.

  After they parted company today, she would not see him again.

  * * *

  They arrived at his father’s house and made their way inside. As soon as they did, Catherine knew something was terribly wrong. Worried faces met them at every turn and they were taken at once to Lord Alderbury’s study, where they found him pacing back and forth.

  ‘What’s wrong?’ Valbourg asked immediately.

  Alderbury turned and Catherine saw something in his face that terrified her. ‘What’s happened?’ she asked, taking a step towards him. ‘Where’s Thomas?’

  He looked at her and his face was white and rigid. ‘He’s gone,’ he said in a tortured voice. ‘A stranger took him. And I have absolutely no idea where.’

  * * *

  It was her worst nightmare come true. Catherine felt Valbourg’s hands close around her arms just before her legs gave way.

  ‘Where did this happen?’ he demanded as he guided her to a chair and helped her sit down.

  ‘In the park,’ Alderbury said. ‘Tippings took the boys to see the ducks. They were feeding them when they heard a commotion nearby. Tippings said he turned to see what the noise was, and when he looked back, Thomas was gone.’

  ‘Dear God!’ Catherine whi
spered.

  ‘Did anyone see who took him?’ Valbourg demanded.

  ‘A woman was standing nearby. She said a man came out of the bushes and grabbed Thomas, then started running towards a carriage. Sebastian ran after them, but the man was too fast. Both the woman and Sebastian gave Tippings as good a description as they could, but the carriage disappeared before he could get back in his own and follow it. Tippings brought Sebastian home immediately to tell me what had happened.’

  ‘And what have you done since?’ Catherine demanded, getting to her feet. ‘Has a search been launched?’

  ‘Of course, but so far nothing has turned up.’

  ‘What did the man look like?’ she whispered, feeling a chill settle into her bones.

  ‘Tall and heavy-set, with dark hair and a beard.’

  Valbourg shared a glance with Catherine. ‘It wasn’t Hailey.’

  ‘I didn’t expect it would be,’ Catherine said. ‘He’d have someone else do his dirty work, but it doesn’t sound like Moody or Stubbs either. He must have hired someone new. Someone I wouldn’t recognise. No doubt the man’s already on his way back to Grafton with Thomas.’

  ‘Miss Jones, I truly am sorry,’ Alderbury said. ‘You left him in my care—’

  ‘You can make your apologies when I have my son back,’ Catherine said coldly. ‘I know you don’t approve of me or of him, but out of respect for your son, I’ll leave it at that.’ She gazed at Valbourg for a moment, then turned and walked out of the room.

  A moment later, Valbourg heard the front door close...and knew what he had to do. ‘I’m going with her.’

  Alderbury flinched. ‘Do you really think that’s necessary?’

  ‘I do. Her son has just been kidnapped and she’s going to need my help.’

  ‘I’m sorry, Richard. Truly I am. I sympathise with Miss Jones’s predicament and feel terrible that it happened while the boy was in my care,’ his father said. ‘But there’s nothing we can do. The authorities have been alerted and I have every confidence they will find the boy. I strongly advise against your getting involved.’