Half Lost

by Sally Green

  * * *

  Later that night I’m sitting with Gabriel, Celia, and Greatorex by the fire and I’m laughing. Celia has been outlining her plan for the attack on Soul: the plan she has been formulating while we have been away.

  When I stop laughing, I say, “It’s taken you a week to come up with that? Walk into the Council building and kill everyone. That’s the plan?!”

  Celia says, “I’d thought you’d appreciate its simplicity.”

  I resist swearing at her and just glare.

  “The annual Council meeting is coming up. It hasn’t been hard to find out the date. It’s an important event to reelect Council members and the Council Leader. Soul, Wallend, and Jessica will be there. It’s a perfect opportunity to remove them. You go in first. Take out those key personnel and then we come in and deal with the Council members and Hunters who are there.”

  Gabriel frowns. “And what if they’re not there? If you’ve got the date wrong?”

  “If they’re not there, then Nathan will have to make the best decisions in the circumstances. Which I have every confidence he will do.”

  I’m thinking already that I know what I’ll do if that is the case: I’ll burn the Council building. Destroy everything that I can.

  Celia continues. “The major problem with any attack is that the Hunters can become invisible. With that Gift they will always have the upper hand. Whatever happens to Soul, the Hunters will carry on fighting and we can’t win against an invisible army: we can’t catch or kill what we can’t see.

  “We have used truth potions on two Hunters we caught but haven’t found out much. It seems that even the Hunters don’t know a lot about how the magic is made to work, but we do know that Wallend controls the ability through the use of witch’s bottles. The Hunters who have the power to go invisible control it themselves but Wallend gives them the Gift.”

  Much as I want to kill Soul, I agree with Celia. I say, “So getting rid of the Hunters’ power of invisibility is the first objective, then Soul.”

  “Yes.”

  “What’s Soul’s Gift?”

  “Potions. The same as Wallend. But Soul doesn’t have a strong Gift; that’s why he uses Wallend. Wallend has an exceptional Gift.”

  “And Wallend works from the Council buildings, does he?”

  “Yes, all the information we have received about him shows that he spends most of his time there. I can see no reason why he would change his habits.”

  Nor can I. He always struck me as someone who was obsessed with his job and had no life outside it. With the success of the Council he’s had no reason or need to move.

  Celia goes on. “Knowing Soul’s desire for control and also his lack of trust in the Hunters, I’m sure he will be keeping whatever magic it is that gives the Hunters their powers of invisibility close to himself. It’s all got to be in that building somewhere. If all you do is get in, find the witch’s bottles or whatever they are, and neutralize the Hunters’ ability to go invisible, I’d count the mission as a success.”

  “You might; I won’t.”

  “Well, I agree; we should aim for more. We need to remove Soul, Wallend, and Jessica, and we need to ensure no one escapes the building: capture all those in it.”

  “I thought the plan was to walk in and kill them?” And I’m reminded again of my father’s advice to kill them all. I’ve killed so many minor players, unimportant Hunters, that it would almost be an insult to them if I let Soul, Wallend, and Jessica off.

  “Kill or capture,” Celia says.

  “Fine.”

  Celia continues. “There are several problem areas, of course.”

  “Of course.”

  “The first problem is getting into the Council building. There are three entrances. The main entrance, the one on the high street, is the simplest way in but is too public. The last thing we want is some fains noticing something.”

  I know that entrance. It’s open and clearly going to be guarded and protected. Even invisible, I don’t fancy that route.

  “OK, I agree with that,” I say.

  “The rear entrance isn’t used now and is sealed off as far as we can tell. I think they saw it as a weak spot: it was always difficult to guard, with poor sight lines and fain properties very close all around. Anyway, it’s no longer an option.”

  The back entrance is the one Gran and I used to use when we went for my Assessments and is a way I know well but that doesn’t matter now, it seems.

  “The entrance in Cobalt Alley is still in use but too dangerous.”

  “They’re all dangerous,” I say, “but I know how the magic in the alley works. It draws you into the building, right? Can’t we use that to our advantage?”

  Celia shakes her head. “The alley leads into an internal courtyard, which is an exposed area where we could be contained and picked off. If I was in charge of security I’d make this option look tempting but the next access door would be impenetrable. I’m certain that is what Soul will have done.”

  “So what’s it to be then? The roof? The windows?” I’m only joking a little. I’m sure the whole place will be protected against intruders.

  “We go in through a cut from another Council property. From the Tower.”

  “The Tower?”

  “Roman Tower, to give it its full name. It’s the Council-run prison for White Witches. I know it well. So does Greatorex, so do all the Hunters. Part of Hunter duty every year is spent there working as a guard. There’s a cut from the Tower into the Council building.”

  “And you can get us into the Tower?”

  “I’ve had it watched for weeks. We know the routines of the guards, the numbers and times they change. There is a system of passwords and checks but you, Nathan, will be able to enter with the guards while you’re invisible. Once you’re inside, you overpower the guards and let us in.”

  “How many guards are there?”

  “Six Council guards and four Hunters at any time. Each on eight-hour shifts. The prison is easy to guard and patrol. None of the prisoners are ever let out of their cells.”

  “Nice.”

  “It’s not meant to be nice.”

  “OK. So I slip in, deal with the guards, and let you guys in. Then what? I go through the cut to the Council building and find Wallend, Soul, and Jessica?”

  “Precisely. But that brings us to the second problem: Jessica.”

  Celia rubs her face with her hand, then says, “Even if Soul, Wallend, and the Council are defeated, the Hunters will still be against us. The Hunters do the bidding of the Council but they don’t follow Soul; their true loyalty is only to their leader, to Jessica. While Jessica is alive, the Hunters will fight. Whatever has happened to Soul or Wallend, she’ll never surrender.”

  “And?”

  “You let her live in Geneva,” Celia says.

  I laugh. “Oh. So the problem is that you think I won’t kill her?”

  “Is it a valid problem?”

  “No.” At least I don’t think it is. Jessica is my half-sister, the daughter of my mother, but I hate her. I do believe she’s evil. And I know she’d kill me without a second thought. It’s true I let her go in Geneva. But we weren’t at war then. Things have changed, and I’ve changed too.

  I tell Celia, “Don’t worry. I’ll kill or capture her.”

  Celia nods and moves swiftly on. “Problem three is also to do with Hunters. There is a myth about them that they won’t surrender or run—ever. But, as you know, that isn’t totally true. Many will die rather than surrender but the truth is that they are all human. Some will choose to live. And I think when they see that they can’t win they will make a tactical withdrawal, and they may even surrender. If they do, then we don’t harm them. The organization will need to be disbanded. We need to break the history of the Hunters.”

  I remember my dream
of a long line of Hunter prisoners.

  “Executing them all would be a good way to do that.”

  “No it wouldn’t. Hunters come from virtually every family of White Witches. We need to show tolerance and fairness. They are soldiers. They aren’t evil.”

  I shake my head at Celia.

  “We don’t kill prisoners, Nathan. And we don’t kill those who surrender.”

  “So what exactly is the third problem?”

  “Nathan, I need to be sure that you won’t kill them if they’ve surrendered, and if they want to surrender you let them. I need to believe that you know it would be wrong to execute prisoners.”

  “You mean you need to believe I’m not like my father. That I don’t want revenge for my ancestors who were all killed by them. And what about all the other Black Witches who’ve been killed by Hunters? Can’t I get a little revenge for them too?”

  “I want us to win this battle, not get revenge.”

  “‘Kill them all’ is my motto.”

  “Even if they’ve surrendered? That makes you no better than Soul.”

  “Yes . . . No.” I’m not sure how I feel except that I’m pissed off. I sneer at her and say, “You can try them all first for war crimes if that makes you feel any better. Then execute them.”

  Celia says, “My plan is to run the Alliance with Whites and Blacks and Half Bloods working together. We will have to investigate carefully and publicly the crimes that the Council and its members have committed. But we must all be careful not to commit similar ones. Or we too will be in the dock.

  “We will work together and we will have to be, and be seen to be, fair to all. Just and fair. To all, including you, Nathan. I’m warning you that this will happen. That is the society that we need to establish and we all must be subject to the same rules. The battle is the easy bit; what comes after will be the real challenge.”

  “Thanks,” I say. “Glad everyone appreciates what a doddle of a job I’ve got on my hands.”

  Celia says, “So, back to our attack. Is the third problem a valid one?”

  I tell her, “My objective is to win the battle and remove, one way or the other, Soul and Wallend and Jessica. I’ll kill anyone who gets in the way of that or who tries to kill me or any Alliance fighters. If we win and there are any Hunters or Council members alive, I’m going to leave them to you to sort out. You can sit in the Council building in meetings all day playing with your conscience; I’ll be living quietly by a river.”

  “And Annalise?”

  “I won’t forget my mission and go hunting her down. Wallend, Soul, and Jessica are my priority.”

  “If Annalise is alive she should go on trial as the Alliance originally planned.”

  “Well, let’s just hope she’s been tortured to death by now.”

  Celia doesn’t respond to that so I say, “The next problem?”

  She starts to get up, saying, “It’s late; we’ll go through them tomorrow. We all meet here first thing. There’s one more thing you should know. I’m going to tell everyone about your invulnerability. It will give them confidence going into the fight.”

  I think about it, but I don’t suppose it’ll make any difference to me what they know.

  “Fine,” I say.

  She takes a step away and then turns back to me. “I suspect the major problem will be problem fifty-one, so don’t be complacent with your new Gift.” And then she walks off to her tent.

  I shake my head. I’m not feeling the least bit complacent.

  “What’s she talking about?” Gabriel asks. “Problem fifty-one?”

  I tell him, “It’s one of her things. She always used to say there were many problems in any battle and she could always come up with fifty things that could go wrong. Problem fifty-one was slightly different; it was always there, but even she couldn’t think what it could be.”

  Never-Ending Problems

  The annual meeting of the Council is a big affair and will include the key Council members from Britain and possibly a few from Europe. But it’s such an obvious target that it’s bound to be well guarded. We can only hope that they think the Alliance is so weak and depleted it will be unable to attack.

  Problem four is the date. The meeting is usually held on the last day of April but it would be typical of Soul to change this.

  Problem five is the layout of the Council building, which is a labyrinth of corridors. I’ve been there every birthday from age eight to age fourteen but I’ve only seen a fraction of the building; even from my limited experience I realize it’s vast and the corridors complex. Celia, Greatorex, and some of the other members of the Alliance do know the building, or at least parts of it, and they’ve drawn up a plan from the cells in the basement to the attic rooms. There are some areas on the top floors that they don’t know and of course they think that is where Wallend has his laboratory.

  All the Alliance trainee fighters from Camps One to Seven are here now. There are more than I hoped but fewer than we need: twenty-seven. Most faces I don’t recognize. We all spend time learning the layout of the building. The plan is for me to go in first and for the other members of the Alliance to come in only if I can remove the Hunters’ invisibility and after I’ve killed or captured Soul. Greatorex keeps saying to the trainees, “You must be able to find your way if it’s dark and smoke-filled. You must know it better than any place you’ve ever been.” And that’s true for me as well.

  To help us learn the layout of the building, each floor has been marked out on the ground, and key areas have been replicated with walls made of wood and canvas. These are the basement, ground floor, and top floor. The basement is where we will enter. The cut from the Tower goes in there, to make it easier to move prisoners between the cells and the Tower. The ground floor has all the main offices and meeting rooms, including Soul’s private office.

  They’ve been working on the replica while I’ve been away but when I go round it some things don’t seem right to me. The stairs down to the basement should be narrower. I remember the guards had to push me ahead of them and it was really cramped.

  I go into the replica of the cell that I was kept in. The walls are canvas and there’s no roof. It’s morning and the sky is blue above. I pace out the cell as I remember it. Where I was chained up, how far I could move along the wall. I walk out of the cell and go to Room 2C. This seems more like the real place; the canvas walls remind me of the white of the room. I lie down in it and remember Wallend bending over me, tattooing me. I wonder how many others he’s done that to by now.

  I wander around the whole cell area. Learning the layout but wondering, too, how many people they will be holding in each cell. Just one in solitary or twenty squeezed in with no space to lie down? I remember all the stories Celia used to read me about the gulags and the punishments and interrogations, and I’m sure they’ll be making each place as bad as they can.

  I sit in my old cell again, up against the wall in the corner where I sat the first night I was forced to stay indoors as my witch powers grew. I remember how sick I was, how frightened. I was sixteen, which sounds so young, but I’m only seventeen now and I realize that I was in the cell a year ago, less than a year ago. Shit, it feels like twenty years. And I’ve changed, experienced so much. Back then all I wanted was to escape and be given three gifts on my birthday; all I wanted was to live free. And here I am, and I’ve got my Gift and many more besides. I’ve got more power than I’d have thought possible and I’m risking it all. And yet I feel confident about the attack. I am invulnerable after all. I know we have a good chance. Soul and Wallend and Jessica will be there for sure. And Annalise, if she’s still alive, may be down here somewhere, in this cell or a prisoner in the Tower. I tell myself that but I also know there’s a chance she isn’t a prisoner, isn’t being tortured, but being kept in comfort because she shot Marcus, because she’s a spy.

  “I won
dered where you were. It’s getting late.” Gabriel comes and sits by me.

  It’s dark. The day’s gone and the last few hours I’ve been lying here in the cell, thinking.

  “What’s bothering you?” Gabriel asks.

  “You want the full list or just the top ten?”

  I’m surprised that my voice is shaking. Saying it makes me realize how close to the edge I am. And I know soon I’m going to step off it completely.

  Gabriel leans close to me, his voice quiet as he says, “Give me the full list.”

  “Am I bad for killing people? For wanting to kill them?”

  “You have the power to fight. You do what other people can’t do. You’re not bad, Nathan. But do what you believe in; only do that. You have to live with your conscience. Only you can know what’s in there and only you have to live with it.”

  I rub my face in my hands. And I suddenly want my father back with me to help me.

  “I never thought I’d kill people. A year ago I was being kept in this cell and I didn’t want to kill anyone, not even the people who held me prisoner. I just wanted to escape, just wanted freedom. And now I have that; I have my freedom.”

  “Do you? Sometimes I think you’re still a prisoner. You’re not free of this place in your head, Nathan. And you’re definitely not free of those people. They haunt you.”

  “Maybe. I dream about them a lot. Bad dreams. In my dream there’s a long line of prisoners kneeling on the floor, hands tied behind their backs. And when I say a long line I mean long, never-endingly long. And I walk behind them and I have a gun and I shoot each one in the back of the head. And as each one slumps to the ground I step forward and execute the next one.”

  “And this is a dream? Not a vision?”

  I shake my head. “Visions feel different. This is a dream. But I hate it more than anything. I hear my father’s voice telling me, Kill them all. Kill them all. And he’s not angry or mad or anything like that: he’s calm and logical, and he fills me with confidence that I can do it. And I know when I get to the end of the line I’ll be able to stop, and my father will be quiet.” I look at Gabriel and say, “But I never get to the end of the line. I’m never able to stop.”