The Boyfriend Arrangement: A Fake Marriage Romance

by Lara Swann

  I shake my head and take a bite of my own roll.

  It’s fairly dry, almost-stale bread - but right now, I can see her point. And hell, if it makes her sound like that, then it’s got my vote for one of the best things ever.

  “I’m…gonna go find us some water, Caz.” I say eventually, after my vision has evened out a little.

  I feel able to walk again, and figure out how to get from here to the kitchen - the next room over - without getting lost.

  She nods, still distracted by the food on the table.

  It takes me longer than I thought to find the kitchen, the glasses, the sink. I down a couple of glasses of water myself, despite my body protesting that the last thing it wants is more liquid, and start feeling a little better as I head back with a couple of glasses of water for Cassie.

  I find her standing next to the cocktail table, another glass of something in her hands, and grinning at me unrepentant.

  The worst thing about drunk-Cassie. Whatever you do to try to sober her up, she develops a taste for alcohol that’s almost relentless. She’ll down just about anything, and becomes sneaky and underhanded about finding more to drink.

  I’m not even mad as I walk over to her, just amused at the familiar antics. At least I’ll have a story or two to tell her in the morning.

  “God, what the fuck is this?” I ask as I take the glass of murky brown liquid away from her. I think I could get drunk from the fumes.

  “Some…drinks…” She gestures at the table, then giggles and skips away from me as I try to hand her the water, spinning in a circle.

  She gets dizzy immediately, and her feet quickly become tangled. I grab her before she falls, pulling her against me and supporting her weight.

  God, that was easier when simply touching her didn’t make my heart jump.

  “C’mon, Cassie…” I start.

  “Hey—!” She says suddenly, hitting my chest. I wince - not because it hurts, but because it’s a good indication of how much she’s had to drink. “You…do want kids…reeeeallly, right?”

  I freeze, my eyes instinctively glancing across to where Maria and Mark are talking. They definitely heard that.

  “It’ssss jusst…” Cassie slurs slightly, her eyes trying to focus on me. “Y’know…”

  Fuck.

  I know this is Cassie asking - not the act we’ve been playing at, but a real question. And she wants a real answer - my real answer.

  But there’s no way I can have a conversation with real-Cassie here - and I have to shut her up.

  I glance across to see Mark and Maria’s conversation faltering, even as they try not to obviously look over at us.

  The only thing I can do is continue the act. It’ll be convincing, that’s for sure.

  “We’ve been over this, Cassie.” I say, deliberately irritably. “And…now…isn’t the time to talk about it.”

  “Buuut—” She frowns, looking confused - at least partly because she’s struggling to keep up with what I’m saying.

  “You always get like this when you’re drunk, it stops you thinking straight.” I huff, very aware of my audience. “It’ll be different in the morning.”

  She squints up at me, still leaning heavily into my chest.

  “Soo…you…don’t?” She asks again.

  “No.” I repeat, cursing the need to respond so definitively about it right now. “I don’t.”

  Her expression shifts from that puzzled concentration to obviously hurt - and more than a little confused. She pushes away from me, stumbling a little, and I refuse to let go entirely, continuing to support her weight.

  My stomach twists and I wish I could take it back - that could tell her here and now that yes, of course I want children. I couldn’t imagine life without them. I want to wipe that hurt from her face and reassure her, but that would defeat the whole point.

  I’m not even looking over at the completely silent other side of the room. Right now, I can’t face seeing anything similar on their expressions either, even if that had been the point of it.

  “Well..okay…” She says, her brow furrowed as she doesn’t quite meet my gaze. “Thats…fine, then.”

  Her tone makes it obvious it’s not fine, but also that she thinks it should be.

  “Why don’t we talk about it tomorrow?” I say, trying to make it obvious that they’ll be something more to say then, but knowing she’s not in a state to pick up on it.

  Cassie just shrugs, and I sigh.

  “And…maybe we should head to bed now, too.” I say, looking her up and down.

  She’s obviously near to her limits, and the emotional turbulence isn’t helping her either. It’s late and I at least feel well and truly done with the evening.

  “I…” She frowns, pushing away from me again. “I’m…still hungry.”

  I let her stumble towards the other table, pushing the glass of water into her hand as an afterthought and checking to make sure she has the balance for it.

  She does, and her expression makes it clear enough she also needs the space between us for a bit, so I stay hovering around the drinks table.

  Which only makes the atmosphere in the room tense and awkward. Maria and Mark are barely talking, and with Cassie’s obvious discomfort and the silence between us, I find it hard to just stand there, sip water and watch.

  It lightens a little as Cassie starts working her way through the table of food, and I’m slightly relieved that it might sober her up a little. She’s still not really looking at me, but at least with the food and her alcohol-fogged mind there’s a good chance she won’t dwell on what we just talked about. Or at least, she’ll forget about what she’s feeling uncomfortable about for a while.

  If tonight goes anything like any of a dozen others.

  “Cassie!” The loud voice goes straight through my head, and I wince as the door opens. “There you are. We didn’t finish our chat.”

  Cassie and I turn around at the same time. Unlike Cassie and I, Adelaide doesn’t seem like she’s had much to drink - maybe her voice is a little louder than usual, but that could just be her.

  “I’m…done talking.” Cassie shakes her head, holding onto the table for balance as she stares her mother down.

  Adelaide folds her arms as she approaches her daughter, and ignores that comment entirely as she continues, only lowering her voice a little now that she’s right next to Cassie.

  “I told you, I’m concerned about you, Cassandra. I think you’re working too much - it’s all you seem to do! I mean, have you thought about the rest of your life, how this career of yours is going to impact—”

  Cassie deliberately turns away from her, staring at the table of food instead, but she doesn’t pick anything else up and I’m pretty sure she’s not seeing anything in front of her.

  “I mean, Beth is engaged now. Just look at what your sisters are doing. Don’t you feel that you’re missing out, that something’s gone wrong somewhere?” Adelaide continues, and my blood starts to rise just from the snippets I can hear from where I’m standing.

  “I’m fine, Mom.” Cassie says firmly.

  It’s the weary resignation there that gets me. It doesn’t even feel like an argument - just Adelaide’s forceful opinion pummeling her in a way that she’s obviously used to enduring.

  “I don’t think you are, Cassie - I’m not even sure you know what fine is, or should be, and—”

  I push away from the table I’m leaning against, walking towards them.

  Fuck this.

  Cassie might be used to listening to the barrage of words and just ignoring it, but I’m not willing to. And she’s not exactly in the best state to take it well, anyway. Even if she can hide it from her Mom, I can tell that it’s starting to get to her.

  I don’t get a chance to say anything as I approach - Adelaide looks over to me and smiles widely, as if my appearance proves her point.

  “Josh, there you are - talk to Cassie for me. Don’t you worry about how much she’s working, and
this crazy career she wants to pursue? It can’t be nice for you, having her busy and tired so much of the time, and—”

  It takes me a moment to recover from the ridiculous assumption that I’ll take her side in this, but once I get over my disbelief, I give her a wide smile, reveling in the chance to shut her up.

  “Not at all, Adelaide - hell, it’s a good thing, really. Just think of what she’ll earn when she’s done with med school - enough to support us while I’m trying to break into acting, that’s for sure!” I put my arm around Cassie and kiss her temple, looking between them both with an oblivious expression.

  Cassie freezes beside me, just staring for a few long moments - she knows how much I detest other actors that do precisely that, and I’m pretty sure even as an act, she’d never expected to hear those words from me.

  Just shows how much I put into my acts, I’m sure.

  Then she dissolves into laughter, her Mom staring at us in utter horror. Her hands clutch at me and the table for support as she almost doubles over, and I know she’s just thrilled with that response - and what it’ll make her mother think.

  “Oh…Josh…” She’s gasping, her head resting against my chest now as I try and hold her upright one-handed.

  I look down at her with a wry smile, even as I wonder whether she’ll say something to give us away in this state.

  “Well, it’s been a lovely day, Adelaide. Thank you so much for organizing all this - Beth seems very happy.” I say pleasantly. “But I think it’s time for us to crash now - you know Cassie, she can’t hold a little champagne for anything.”

  Adelaide doesn’t say anything, still staring at me, her mouth opening and closing.

  I tilt my head towards Cassie and raise a brow. “Bed?”

  Tears are running down her cheeks from laughter, but as happy as it makes her seem, I can sense the edge of hysteria too it. This evening has messed her up a little - probably largely because of her Mom - and I want to get her away from all of that.

  Cassie nods against me, still gasping for breath, and I give Adelaide a quick nod before I guide us towards the door - completely ignoring the hostile way she’s looking at me.

  “I can’t…” Cassie tries to breath in between bouts of laughter on the way back to our room. “…believe…you said that.”

  I grin down at her. “You’re welcome, babe.”

  I take us into the room and try to maneuver her towards the bed, but she slumps against the wall instead, pulling me with her.

  Our bodies are suddenly so close that I can feel hers more acutely than if we were actually touching. My breathing hitches, and I have to force myself under control as she looks happily up at me, still laughing. Even slightly splotchy and lop-sided from far too much to drink, it’s a sight that takes my breath away - her cheeks red and eyes sparkling up at me, cute and cherubic.

  “She’s…never going to forgive that.” Cassie says breathlessly, looking delighted at the idea. “Worst…impression…you could give.”

  I smile back, and because I can’t help myself, I lean forward to kiss her. She pushes forward into it, moaning the moment after our lips meet and wrapping her body around mine.

  Fuck.

  I hadn’t expected that.

  My cock jumps up at sudden attention, and I have to bite back my own groan of desire.

  My tongue enters her mouth even as I’m thinking what a fucking stupid idea this is. Meets hers. Tangles and dances as my hands run through her hair, tugging and arching her into me.

  Double fuck.

  I’m playing with fire.

  My own control balanced on a knife-edge…wanting more, but knowing if I go much further, I won’t be able to come back from it.

  With a muttered curse, I pull back, leaving us both gasping now.

  She looks up at me, hot and aroused and impossibly seductive.

  “Fuck me, Josh.” She says, breathy and perfect.

  My hand lands on the wall next to her head, to stop it from bringing her into me again.

  “You’re drunk.” I say, knowing she doesn’t care but trying to remind myself at least.

  I do care.

  I’m not fucking her like this.

  “So are you.” She grins, pressing forward again and running her hands down my back, sending sparks of need through me.

  She’s touching me the way I’ve always wanted.

  And it’s so much better than I pictured.

  I do groan now, and my hand comes up to cup her head again.

  My mouth teases hers as I try and pull myself back, making it so much harder for both of us.

  “C’mon…I want you.” She murmurs into my ear, and I kiss her just to shut her up.

  I don’t know what she’s going to say next, but if I have to hear any more, I’m not going to be able to hold back.

  “We should…try it…” She adds, as we come up for air, and she holds onto the back of my neck, pulling herself closer.

  Fuck fuck fuck.

  “Not…like this.” I say, pressing my lips against hers one last time and then pulling back hard. “We need…to go…to bed.”

  It leaves her there, leaning against the wall and looking back at me. Her expression twists into confusion as I step back and retreat towards the bathroom, trying to get my raging desire under control.

  I disappear into it, pushing the door to and running the tap. I ignore it for a good few minutes as I fight to get my breathing under control - to not run out there and kiss her as she wants me to, fuck her as she wants me to.

  Fuck it all to hell.

  You don’t want it to be like this. You don’t.

  I keep repeating it over and over again, until eventually I start to believe it again.

  By the time I come out of the bathroom with what feels like enough water to fill the tub, she’s buried under the covers and won’t talk to me.

  I make her drink the water anyway, and sigh heavily as I get into bed beside her.

  Beside, and so far away.

  My cock hard and aching, and my body still on fire.

  Am I going to get any fucking sleep this vacation?

  Chapter Nine

  Cassie

  “Good morning!” I say brightly.

  Josh groans at me and rolls over.

  I smile and just watch, sitting on the bed above the covers and waiting for him to work through the hangover.

  When he finally blearily works out that I’m not going away, he sits up enough for me to hand him a glass of water and some painkillers.

  It still takes another twenty minutes before he’s willing to open his eyes enough to look at me, as they slowly kick in.

  “Don’t tell me you feel fine.” He says accusingly, and I continue smiling at him.

  “Happy as can be.” I say cheerily.

  “Fucking lightweights.” He mutters. “Get all the benefits.”

  He downs the rest of the water and I hop off the bed to top it up.

  Our standard routine.

  He watches out for me while I get off-my-head drunk from half of what he consumes, making sure I don’t do anything too stupid. And the morning after, when he’s hungover and grouchy and I’m fine, I’m there for this slow, complaint-ridden recovery. Which usually ends up being about providing lots of water, painkillers and a massive fry up.

  “What’s the time?” He asks as I bring the water back.

  “Probably mid-morning.” I say.

  “It’s so hot in here. I’m dying, Cassie.”

  “I think it’s just you.” I grin at him again, shrugging. “I’m a little warm maybe - but I think that’s just the sun on our closed blinds. We’re normally in the pool by now.”

  “The sun is not my friend today.” He shudders. “Under the covers sounds better. Can you bump up the air conditioning for me, Caz? Please?”

  He looks so distraught that I can’t help but oblige, fiddling with the largely incomprehensible panel until I hear the whirring of the fan start up. He sighs in relief as I ta
ke my place back on the bed, nudging his leg.

  “Oh thank god.” He says, slumping back against the headboard and closing his eyes again. After a moment, he opens them enough to meet mine. “We don’t have to be anywhere, do we?”

  “Nope.” I laugh a little, and he winces at the sound. “I’ve no idea who’s awake, but I’m not exactly anxious to see anyone just yet.”

  Last night is still hazy and I don’t remember many details, but there were more than enough uncomfortable conversations with my family - and especially my Mom - that I’m not looking forward to facing the after-effects this morning. The only thing that’s really stuck with me, is that Josh was there to support me - almost all evening. I could feel that he was looking out for me the whole time, fending off the worst of my Mom’s comments and trying to look after me.

  It was what I woke up thinking about this morning.

  Well, that - and the fact I’d suggested he fuck me last night.

  He didn’t fuck me. Of course not.

  And I didn’t mean it.

  I mean, we’re not actually together. Just friends.

  And it says something about our friendship, that I can remember that and feel more uncomfortable about whatever I might have said to my Mom.

  He’s the only guy I can ever imagine facing this easily the morning after, sitting on the bed and smiling at him, despite doing something as fucking stupid as that.

  But neither of us have even mentioned it, and for some reason I don’t feel awkward.

  I guess it’s obvious enough to both of us that it was just a drunken fluke.

  One that’s never happened before, sure. But one that we both know didn’t mean anything.

  So we’re fine, recovering from the morning-after together and chatting easily as always.

  Or at least, we will be, so long as I can just shake this fucked-up feeling that even now, fully sober, it’s still a hot thought.

  “I could murder a diner breakfast right now.” Josh interrupts my reverie, a half-hopeful expression on his face as he looks at me.

  “I’m not convinced the ranch has it’s own restaurant. Or that there’s anything for miles around.” I point out unsympathetically. “Not that I’m particularly looking forward to breakfast here - if anyone can even be bothered to make anything.”