Irrelevant Jack 2

by Prax Venter

  “You’ll never get past me!” the living wall shouted before most of its surface bristled with sharpened wooden poles. “Turn back while you still can!”

  Jack turned to Lex. “We’re fighting walls?”

  The blonde Bastion put a hand on her hip, and Jack’s eyes were pulled to her new, thicker, white armor. If he was going to be honest with himself, he missed the more tightfitting look she had before. “At least it’s not charging toward us,” she said with a shrug. “We have plenty of ranged combat roles.”

  “Right,” Jack said, drawing his blade and taking a few steps closer to the talking barrier. As he moved within the twenty-yard range of his Mining Laser, he saw two small gaps at its bottom just big enough for the rails to pass through. “Someone keep an eye on that train behind us,” he said before blasting the bizarre creature for three seconds.

  Living Wood Wall -57 | HP 443/500

  Living Wood Wall -57 | HP 386/500

  Living Wood Wall -57 | HP 329/500

  The wall’s eyes rolled up into its head as Jack tore its life away, and once he stopped, its huge lips twisted into a snarl. The sharpened wooden spears bristling on its surface sunk back into the wall only to emerge again in random spots. They definitely needed to drill through this thing from a distance. Jack looked over his shoulder to see if they were about to be flattened, but the monstrous train engine remained motionless.

  “Well, this is going to be easier than I thought,” Jack said, holding out his blade again. He took a few more steps forward and renewed his beam attack on the living wall coated in continually stabbing wooden spikes.

  Living Wood Wall -57 | HP 272/500

  … Defeated

  Five more seconds and it was done. The whole wall became a blob of white-noise static before vanishing with a loud buzz. The instant it was gone, Jack heard metallic screeching from behind them echoing off the canyon walls. He spun to see the huge machine scrape off chunks from the red sandstone wall as it began chugging forward.

  “Let’s move!” Jack said, encouraging them to head away from the waking train. He shot a glance ahead, beyond the space only recently occupied by the Living Wood Wall, and saw a taller, stone-like wall blocking the path.

  He had no idea if the death machine behind them would pick up speed, stop again, or maybe even end up being the Boss. They never knew what to expect and could only handle the situation as it unfolded as best they could. And right now, that was moving forward as fast as possible.

  With a quickened pace along the rails, they drew close to the second wall and saw the same type of face emerge from its flat bricks. This wall looked much more substantial, and its intense brown eyes tracked their movements silently. The moment they passed some invisible threshold, Jack noticed the face curve into a vicious grin, and huge boulders launched into the air from behind it.

  “Look up!” Jack shouted, and the whole party scattered. It only took a few moments before the bowling-ball-sized rock blasted up a shower of sand when it landed where Thymus had been. The instant it hit the ground, another launched over the grinning wall.

  “Crush your skulls! Crush your skulls!” the wall’s mouth yelled over and over, its deep voice reverberating in the narrow canyon.

  Jack watched another heavy stone sail from behind the wall and barely over Lex’s head when he had an idea.

  “Rush it! Get close to that weird wall!” he yelled.

  Alt was fastest, his flame body gliding on one point as if he were balanced on a single toe. After dodging a few skull-splitting rocks, the whole team was standing a few feet from the wall’s rough stone bricks along with him.

  Its enormous bulging eyes started shifting left and right, concern expressed on its bizarre face. Jack had held back a bit and watched the last boulder sail a good few feet over his head.

  “It can’t crush our skulls when we’re too close,” he said, holding up his blade and blasting for one second with his Mining Laser.

  Living Stone Wall -57 | HP 543/600

  “This foe is immune to my proximity fire damage,” Alt said loud enough for everyone to hear.

  Jack nodded as he joined them closer to the living wall. “Don’t worry. Everyone save your mana while Lex and I hack away at this thing.”

  The Bastion nodded and instantly began to hack her blade downward, sending up sparks as metal met rough stone.

  Living Stone Wall -45 | HP 498/600

  A few moments later, Jack added his attacks to hers. He was tempted to go for one of its wet, protruding eyes, but something about the whole gory and messy concept kept his sword strikes focused on the stone. He spared a moment to thank whoever was responsible for System Sana for not incorporating weapon wear and tear to its videogame physics.

  With both of them hacking away at the stone wall, it took about 15 seconds for them to finally whittle it down to 0 HP.

  A blue-colored bow dropped to the ground as the massive barrier faded away in buzzing static, and Jack snatched it up without a second glance.

  “That train device still comes,” Thymus said calmly, and Jack turned to look behind them. The thing was moving slowly, its coal engine chugging like a heart at rest, and the Exit Orb affixed to the bladed cowcatcher low on its front was apparently along for the ride. He turned back to face ahead of them through the long, narrow chasm and saw another wall in the distance. This one seemed to be made of metal.

  “Thanks for the heads-up, Thymus,” Jack said, taking a few steps forward. “Let’s keep going. We’re doing great guys!”

  As all four of them followed his brisk pace to the next wall, Jack noticed that the sun was rising incredibly fast. When they had first started, it was just over that first wooden wall. Now it was already nearing high noon.

  “You might want to change my form, Jack,” Alt said as they moved. “I’ve been pretty useless as this flame on this Floor, and the next enemy looks to be made of metal.”

  Lex agreed. “Probably something with a ranged combat role. These Living Walls aren’t moving.”

  But Jack usually liked to wait until they knew for sure when they were at this difficulty level. He could only change Alt’s from once per Floor, and the Boss was what really mattered.

  “I will, but not until we need to. This is the last Floor for the day, and we should dump everything into beating the Boss. So far these unique walls have been no problem for us.” A frown grew on Jack’s face as a thought occurred to him. “Hey, have either of you two seen a Floor where each monster was different? I’ve only ever seen a single foe type, then the unique Floor Boss.”

  “I’ve seen it a few times before,” Lex said.

  “And so have I,” Thymus added, panting a little as he shuffled forward along with their light jog. “I once fought a powerful Floor Boss that sent unique elemental foes down the steps of a gargantuan pyramid.”

  Jack’s vision of Thymus fighting an uphill battle against a water elemental ended when his shoulder was punched by a powerful invisible fist. As he looked down, the intense pain caught up to his brain when he noticed the arrow shaft embedded deep into his body.

  Jack -38 | HP 225/263

  The projectile vanished along with most of the pain as Jack instinctually brought his hand up to the wound.

  “Damn it!” he yelled as another arrow zipped past his face. “Get behind Lex! Alt, dodge!”

  Both he and Thymus moved toward their Bastion as she held up her round shield. She was short, so they both really had to duck to maintain at least partial cover. Lex jerked her shield up and intercepted a projectile with a sharp clank.

  “Move forward,” Jack commanded, putting his hand on her new white armor. “Get us in spell-range.”

  The Bastion nodded and blocked a few more arrows as the lined-up Heroes inched forward.

  Jack was watching Alt zip around on the sand, drawing out some arrow fire when he heard Thymus cry out in pain.

  Thymus -56 | HP 214/270

  The arrow in his foot was fading by the time Jack looked
, and the old mage cowered, making himself as small as he could.

  “Be careful!” Lex shouted.

  “Keep moving!” Jack commanded again, tapping her armored shoulder.

  Another arrowhead impacted her shield, and Lex let out a little growl as she pushed herself forward faster than before. Her guard went low quickly, and she caught another iron-tipped arrow before shifting the slab of metal up again to block another aimed for her head.

  “I’m in range!” Thymus yelled.

  Jack looked up and over Lex’s shoulder and saw that they were still about 30 yards away. The wall now had many iron arms growing out of its surface, all waving dozens of swords and shields.

  “Fire at will, but keep moving,” Jack said over his shoulder, and the mage nodded.

  A purple disk of whirling stars launched outward and impacted one of the polished iron shields held by the wall, but it didn’t seem to stop the magical damage.

  Living Iron Wall -82 | HP 618/700

  “These are tough!” Jack said as another arrow almost clipped his ear. The projectiles seemed to spawn out of thin air at the surface of the metal-arm-filled wall. This one had eyes and a mouth like the other Living Walls before it, but its visage seemed older and a bit wiser. It had stopped trying to shoot the fleet-footed Alt and turned all its attention on Lex and the two Heroes on the railroad tracks behind her.

  Thymus used his second charge and fired another disk.

  Living Iron Wall -82 | HP 536/700

  Jack was still about 5 yards away from the range of his Mining Laser when he realized that whoever was at the back of this Hero train was quickly going to be exposed to the far edges of the wall. The arrows were launching from the entire width, and they were in danger of becoming flanked.

  “Get up here,” Jack said, pushing the old mage behind Lex. “I can take more hits.”

  “No one is taking any hits!” Lex demanded, her attention focused on moving her shield to intercept the barrage of pointed metal whizzing at her from multiple angles.

  Lex -35 | HP 302/337

  The woman he loved took an arrow in her thigh and grunted through the pain as she deflected another aimed for her heart.

  That was it.

  As easy as merely moving a limb, Jack opened his Alter Alt interface and instantly selected (B) Red Shield Riker out of over two hundred options. The Dancing Flame flashed and became a heavily armored centaur dual-wielding two enormous red shields. The half-man, half-horse slid to a stop in the sand, digging in his hooves to change direction and help cover the three Heroes. They’d picked up this shield bearer from a Floor 6 Boss the other day. Red Shield Riker had been accompanied by a band of centaur archers intended to deal the damage while the well-protected Boss took longer to bring down. The fight might have been tough if he and Lex weren’t way above its level. They quickly discovered this summon was great if they needed serious blocking at the expense of any real damage output.

  “It wasn’t that bad of a hit,” Lex said, but the relief in her voice was obvious. Her Bastion class split her paths between defense and healing. She was good at her role, but the party found itself needing a pure defender every now and then.

  With both her and the seven-foot centaur taking the onslaught, the party moved forward again, and Jack was finally able to contribute with his powerful beam ability.

  Living Iron Wall -57 | HP 479/700

  Living Iron Wall -57 | HP 422/700

  …

  Thymus sent out a few more blasts of purple disks, and the damage piled up quickly. With a fade to static, the whole iron wall vanished into thin air. Down the railroad tracks ahead of them was yet another wall, and this one shined like gold.

  Jack shot a glance over his shoulder and saw the spike-covered train continue to creep along the rail. The thing was much closer than he expected it to be.

  Lex’s soothing melody came from behind, and Jack checked his team’s status.

  JACK HP: 225/263 MP: 132/160

  LEX HP: 302/337

  THYMUS HP: 219/270

  ALT HP: 415/415

  Coins: 340

  Inventory Value: 9,564

  Alt Value: 12,358/15,000

  Her healing song topped off Thymus, then she turned to Jack and brought him to full HP with her melodious voice. After she healed herself, Lex gave a silent nod to the rest of them and turned toward the next wall.

  With time not on their side, Jack pushed them past a jog toward their next obstacle. This time, however, Lex and Alt led the charge while Jack and Thymus kept behind their shields. Between the armored horse-man to his left and the Bastion to his right, Jack saw the eyes of this golden wall were adorned with eyeshadow, and its lips were coated in bright red lipstick.

  “Only a few more paces…” Thymus said, alerting the party that he was almost within spell range of the feminine golden wall. Other than the eyes and rouge-covered lips, there were no arms, spears, or attacks of any kind. Jack did not like the smirk on the living barrier’s wide face.

  “Hold,” Jack said, and everyone stood still. He looked back at the Arcane Mage. “You still good on mana?”

  Thymus nodded. “Under half, but it should be plenty for the rest of the Floor.”

  “Send out one of your disks and let’s see what we’re dealing with here,” Jack ordered, pointing at the wall.

  The old wizard held up one of his hands and casually sent a whirling cloud of purple sparks into the wall. There was a flash of what appeared to be glowing glass across its whole surface accompanied by a strange echoing sound. Then, the Arcane Disk reversed direction and returned to its caster with increased speed.

  Thymus -82 | HP 188/270

  “Oh!” the old man in the blue robes yelled out in pain before falling backward into the sand.

  Jack reached down to help him up while Alt covered Lex’s healing song. As the Bastion restored their mage, haughty laughter filled the canyon. He looked up to see the magically protected foe laughing at them.

  “You’ve made it this far, but you best turn back… pitiful creatures.” The living wall’s thick red lips sneered that last part.

  Jack looked back at the slowly plodding train and considered their options. Was this thing surrounded by an impenetrable barrier? No, the Tower was random, but there was always a way forward. Perhaps it was only immune to magic attacks?

  He turned to Lex. “You and me, we’re rushing that thing right now. Melee attacks only.”

  Not that Lex had any other type of attack, but he wanted to be clear about what the plan was. His mind took a moment to explore what would have happened if Thymus had put down his Lightning Turret and its attacks rebounded back to its creator for the next ten minutes.

  The beautiful blonde woman whom Jack had come to adore nodded and signaled that she was ready.

  “I’ll go right, you go left,” Jack said before digging his boots into the loose sand and sprinting toward the barrier.

  The wall’s big eyes opened wide and its smile twisted into an excited snarl before a ball of fire shot from its mouth. The blazing orb moved with blinding speed to intercept Jack, but he reacted almost on instinct and dove over the magic attack, landing with a graceful roll. An instant later, the wall blew a kiss at Lex and a cluster of huge icicles launched at the rushing Bastion. Lex was not so light on her feet and could not dodge the magic ice spell.

  Lex -61 | HP 276/337

  Enraged, Jack sprinted the rest of the distance before drawing his cheating blade. The wall’s massive eye was directly in front of him, and despite the horror of such a sight, Jack slashed his sword directly across the pupil.

  Living Gold Wall -62 | HP 238/300

  The barrier’s lips contorted into a deafening screech as Jack savaged its eye. He’d done more damage than he should have and didn’t know if this particular wall was weak to melee attacks or if the eyes were a weak point all along. Either way, he had his target.

  “Go for its-” was all Jack was able to say before a bolt of lightning struc
k the top of his head.

  Jack -78 | HP 185/263

  Living Gold Wall -50 | HP 188/300

  Lex slashed the other eye as it blew out another fireball from its red-lipped mouth, but the angle was wrong, and the magic attack harmlessly detonated on the canyon wall instead.

  Jack shook off his stun as Lex took another swing.

  Living Gold Wall -50 | HP 138/300

  He was tempted to use his Mining Laser but didn’t want to risk it bouncing back and hitting him. Instead, Jack activated his other ability, Double Strike, right into the ruined jelly mess of this horrible creature’s eye.

  Living Gold Wall -95 Critical! | HP 43/300

  Living Gold Wall -62 | Defeated

  Jack +1 | HP 186/263

  The wall vanished with a loud buzzing static and a pair of metal boots dropped onto the railroad tracks.

  Lex sheathed her sword and approached him as Thymus and a heavily armored centaur moved to join them.

  “I’m going to run out of Mana if we keep taking this much damage,” she said before she began her wordless melody.

  Jack nodded and checked the next wall while her perfect voice healed him to full. It appeared as if the next barrier was made of ice. How many of these damned things were there?

  When Lex was finished, he moved to scoop up the heavy iron boots that dropped from the Living Gold Wall.

  “There is truly no limit…” Thymus mumbled, watching Jack. “How many items are you currently holding for the Town?”

  Alt answered, saving Jack from trying to count. “Jack is holding 167 items in his inventory for a combined Value of 9,564.”

  Thymus’ skin turned a lighter shade of pale and his mouth worked as he tried to fathom that much loot. Jack knew that every other Hero in System Sana had a hard limit of 16 item slots, and the three of them would only be able to hold a total of 48 items if it weren’t for Alt’s special gifts.

  “I’m loaded,” Jack said with a sigh, glancing back at the ever-closing death train. They were making good progress and were definitely gaining ground (and time) with every wall they took down. He could barely make out the white pulsing of the Exit Orb, but he wanted every inch of safety they could get. “Let’s keep moving,” he said. “We gotta be near the end of this Floor.”