Bull scoffed. “I’ve not a clue sugar, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he put a chip or a tracker on you if he does let you out so he can find you.”
“Do you… do you think he’d really do that?” I asked with a shudder.
He shook his head. “Na, that’s not his style but then again if he thought you might disappear again…” he shrugged, “I don’t know what he’d do. When it comes to you, I can’t predict how far he’d go.”
“Why? Why me? Do you think it’s because I’m pregnant? Would he do this to any girl in this situation?” I asked.
“Sorry to burst your bubble babe but no. It sounds fucked up to say this but if this was some other bitch, let’s say Pearl… he would not want a baby with her. Fuck if there would be a way to kill the bitch that got pregnant and not hurt the baby he’d most likely take that route. He’s got issues and this is a sore spot for him.” He told me.
“Why what happened?” I asked.
Bull shook his head. “Not my story to tell. Now, I’m missing out on some drinking and fucking right now, but I’m in no rush to leave my girl. Now, put something good on this T.V. and we can cuddle and braid each other’s hair, yea?” he asked.
I smiled. I picked up the remote and crawled to sit next to Bull. I pulled the covers up over us and laid my head on his chest. He wrapped an arm around me securing me to him and I haven’t felt this safe in a while. He kissed the top of my head. “It’s going to be ok sugar, I promise.” I let his words wash over me and renew my hope. I don’t think it took nothing more than a few minutes for me to fall asleep.
Chapter 9
I awoke slowly. I was aware of the body I was pressed against and the fact that I felt like a million bucks. I haven’t slept that well in months and my body was grateful. I lifted my head off of Bulls chest and snuck a peek at him. He stirred and his eyes opened confusion clear in them. When his eyes came to my face he smiled.
“Morning sugar.”
“Hey Bull.”
“You have drool on your face.” I blushed and used the back of my hand to wipe my face. When it came to the wetness on my chin I cringed. I must’ve slept really good.
“You stayed?” I asked.
He shrugged. “You didn’t really give me a choice. I tried to sneak out when you started snoring but you clung to me for dear life. I figured what the fuck and just went to sleep too.
I shook my head even more embarrassed. “I’m sorry… I just haven’t slept that well in a long time. I guess the fact I feel safe with you helped me out.” I admitted.
He chuckled. “Don’t worry about it, I get it.”
I settled back into him and watched T.V. I had no idea what was playing I just knew at the moment I felt content. That moment was short lived when the door opened and Lucifer entered with a plate of breakfast. His eyes immediately landed on us in the bed. Bulls arm was wrapped around me under the covers. I had my head on his chest and the blanket was pulled up to my neck. His free arm was behind his head allowing him to see the screen over my head. Lucifer’s eyes trailed to the side of the bed where Bull’s boots were then back to us. He dumped the plate on the dresser and his hands fell to his hips. His nostrils flared and his chest was heaving.
“What the fuck?” He asked.
Bull moved to get up but I gripped onto his shirt trying to hold him to me for protection. “Lu-“he began but was cut off.
“You two slept together?” His eyes flew to Bull. “You fucking slept with her?” he asked.
Bull opened his mouth to answer but I beat him to it. “Yes, he did sleep in here with me… so what?” I asked.
Lucifer let out a deep growl and stormed over to us in the bed. “So what?” he repeated as he descended on us. He gripped the blanket and tugged it off. “So what? Is you both die.” He threatened.
I shrank further into Bull. Lucifer successfully pulled the blanket off of us and stared. We were both fully dressed and Bull had already removed his arm from around me. I had on flannel pajamas and socks and Bull was still in his t-shirt and jeans with socks. He gripped Bull by the collar of his shirt and tugged him into a standing position. I jumped off the bed and flew to them. When Lucifer lifted his arm to strike I squeezed myself in the middle of them. I closed my eyes and held my breath waiting for the blow but it never came.
I opened my eyes slowly to see Lucifer peering at me. His eyes were almost black and his face was set in a snarl. “What are you doing?” I asked breathlessly.
“You fucking bitch. You’re going to cost me my best friend. I told you once before you were not going to ever fuck anyone in here and I meant it. I told you what would happen if you did, but here we are.” He spat.
I rolled my eyes and he growled. “We didn’t have sex, we literally slept together. I made him stay because I feel safe with him. He did me a favor keeping me company. He’s you’re best friend; you should know that he wouldn’t do that to you. You should also know that we don’t have that type of relationship. He’s one of my only friend in here and he actually cares about me.” I don’t know when I started but I was poking him in the chest as I spoke. He’d released Bull and was standing toe to toe with me glaring. My voice continued to rise. “Unlike you! You drag me back here and lock me away like… like… a convict or something. I’ve done nothing to you. NOTHING! And you’re torturing me… why?” I shoved him and then I shoved him again harder. “Why are you doing this?! Because I ran? Look at what you’re doing to me now; do you blame me for trying to avoid this?” I asked gesturing to the room. I lowered my voice to a whisper. “I don’t regret it, not one second of it. If I had a choice, I’d do it all again. Hell, I would’ve probably gone further, made sure you never found me. If I get a chance, I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”
I took a step back and held his eyes. “Bull, get the fuck out.” He demanded softly but strongly. I watched Bull leave the room with his head hanging low. As the door closed behind him I felt my safety net vanish just like that.
“You did nothing? Is that what you really fucking think?” He asked and I nodded. He exploded. “You did EVERY FUCKING THING! You fucking ran, with my baby after I warned you not to do anything stupid. Why do you think you have any fucking right to take that away from me?” he asked.
“Are you kidding me? Why do I have the right to take the baby in my stomach away from you?” I asked him thoroughly pissed off he thought he had any rights.
“NO ABELIE! YOU FUCKING TOOK YOU AWAY FROM ME!” His hands gripped my upper arms. “Why the ever loving fuck do you think that is o fucking k? There is nothing alright about it! You want me to fucking care? Since when do I care? I told you I wasn’t that fucking guy but you still hopped in the fucking sheets with me. You want romance and shit then you barked up the wrong tree. You will not get that shit from me.” He said. I could see he was slipping, the calmness he always seems to have was totally gone and in its place was a mad man. A totally crazed guy who for once since he reentered my life I didn’t feel afraid of.
“Sounds like you do.” I said softly.
He scoffed. “Then you’re fucking delusional.” He said releasing me.
His words swirled around in my brain and it all seemed to click into place at once. “You’re mad because I left. If you didn’t care why would it bother you so much? So much you had to come find me and lock me in here so I can’t get away again. You’re the delusional one here. You need to admit it to yourself. You can pretend that all this anger and aggression is just about what i did but you’re just as mad at yourself that it’s causing you to actually feel something.”
He backed up slowly with wild eyes. They were bouncing all over the room but they looked lost. Almost like he was so caught up in his head he wasn’t actually focusing on anything. He gripped the knob and I could see the muscles in his arm flex from the force. He swung the door open and went to leave. “Shut the fuck up, just shut up.”
I walked over to the door and gripped it so he couldn’t close it. “No. You care about me,
accept it.” I continued to push and took a deep breath. This decision could make or break me. “I cared about you! I think… I think I almost loved you.”
His body froze and I held my breath. He took a deep shuddering breath and turned his head to face me. He stared hard into my eyes and he seemed to be having an internal battle. I knew when his decision was cemented when some of the calmness reentered his eyes and stance. “I hate you.” He said, eyes not wavering.
I stumbled back a step feeling literally struck by those three words. He reached out almost as if to steady me and I flinched causing him to retract his hand. I backed into the room slowly before closing the door softly putting a physical barrier between the two of us. I felt the first involuntary tear trickle down my face and chin and watched as the drop hit the floor. I backed up into the dresser and slowly slid down as the weight of his words hit me full force. Hate. I didn’t bother to try to be strong and hold in the tears. There was no way I could if I wanted to. I let the last few days wash over me and succumbed to my tears.
Revelations
Chapter 10
No words were spoken between us after he uttered that four letter word. My fight seems to also have left me. He would bring me my food and I’d eat it and leave it by the door for him so that I didn’t even have to endure him fully entering the room. He’s probably over the moon right now since he’s finally done something to get me to stay in line. It wasn’t so much that to be honest, it’s just I couldn’t bear his presence so I’d do whatever necessary to avoid any kind of contact.
It’s been three weeks since the incident and I felt like I was losing myself. Bull had come to see me twice, and he’s worried about me. There had been a calendar in the room when I’d returned that hadn’t been there before and I should’ve been keeping track of time. I found today’s date and realized I should’ve gone for my six month prenatal appointment two weeks ago, but with everything going on that slipped my mind. I cringed thinking about what it was that needed to be done. I would actually have to interact with Lucifer. What if he didn’t let me go?
I waited until he showed up to bring lunch to broach the subject. He placed the plate down on the dresser and turned to leave. “Lucifer?”
He turned around and looked utterly shocked. I couldn’t blame him because I’d been shocked had he suddenly spoke to me. “I need to see a doctor.” I told him.
He frowned and walked closer to me. I instinctively put up a hand to stop him from getting any closer, he froze in his tracks. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
I shook my head. “No. Nothing is wrong, at least not that I know of… I’m overdue for my prenatal appointment. I have to go to those so they can check the progress and make sure everything is fine.” I explained.
He nodded. “You had a doctor out here?” he asked.
I nodded. “Yes. I was going to Jersey General. My doctor was Alice Silverman.” I explained.
“Ok, do you just go in…?” he asked.
“No, it’s by appointment.”
He took his phone out of his pocket. “Know the number?” he asked.
I shook my head. He pressed a few keys and handed me the phone as it dialed a number. I spoke to the receptionist and after informing them I was past due for my appointment they scheduled me in for the following day. I thanked her and hung up.
“My appointment is tomorrow at noon.” I informed him.
He nodded. “Ok.” Was all the response he offered and left the room. I’m grateful that went as smoothly as it did.
He knocked on the door at 11:00 the next morning. I was already dressed since I wasn’t sure when we would be leaving. I followed him downstairs and out of the clubhouse in silence. He led me to his jeep and shocked the heck out of me by opening the passenger side door for me and closed it once I was fully inside. He turned the radio on to a pop station and I couldn’t help but fidget in my seat. I knew for a fact this wasn’t the type of music he listened to so I could only assume he was putting it on for me. What I didn’t understand was why he was being nice to me all of a sudden. He’d finally admitted his true feelings for me, and if this was his way of pitying me he could keep it.
We pulled into the hospital parking lot with 15 minutes to spare. As soon as he cutoff the engine I hopped out the car not giving him an opportunity to try to pull any more gestures he sure didn’t want or need to do. I navigated to the OB/GYN department and signed in. I turned to see Lucifer trying to get comfortable in one of the chairs in the waiting room, there was a single empty seat beside him. The place wasn’t completely packed, but there were enough people here. I scanned the room for an empty seat and found one next to a woman who looked about ready to burst. I offered her a smile as I took the seat.
“Hi, I’m Annie.” She greeted me.
I offered my hand. “Abee.”
She gestured to my stomach. “So how far along are you?” she asked.
“Six and a half months.” I told her with a smile while my hand rubbed my belly unconsciously.
“Good god, I remember those days. I have 2 weeks left and I cannot wait for this baby to pop on out. My feet are praying for the day I tell you.” She said with a chuckle and I followed suit.
“Does it get harder the further along you get?” I asked.
She shrugged. “Each person is different. It depends on your pregnancy and your body. You know, some woman have to go on bed rest and things while others are still up and running when they’re a week overdue. Hopefully you’re one of the lucky ones and your feet don’t inflate. The only thing I could complain about is that I can’t see anything below the belly. I mean, let’s be real… it’s not all that easy getting your shoes on the right feet or anything if you can’t see what you’re doing.” She rolled her eyes and I laughed.
“Sounds horrible.” I told her.
She smiled. “Oh, I’m just complaining right now. I am here as a walk-in and I’ve been here waiting for an hour, I’m irritable. But really, no matter what I say it’s all worth it for this baby.”
I grinned at her. I chanced a glance at Lucifer who was watching me from across the room with narrowed eyes. “I agree.” I told her and it was true. This baby was worth me enduring anything that Lucifer throws at me. No matter what he does or says to me, my child is worth facing any obstacle… and he might be one of the biggest of all.
When the nurse called my name and I stood, I watched as Lucifer followed suit. I frowned, what was he doing? Sure he was my ride here and I figured he’d stick around afraid I’d run… but following me into the exam room was a bit much. I walked slowly to the door leading to the back and waited for him to catch up.
“What are you doing?” I asked in an angry whisper.
He looked down at me with a cocked eyebrow. “What?” he asked.
I sighed. “Where are you going? I’m just going to an exam room.”
He shrugged. “I’m coming too…”
I shook my head. “Is there any way you won’t come?” I asked.
He shook his head slowly and I blew out an exasperated breath. I brushed past him bumping into his shoulder none too gently and stomped after the nurse to the room. When we entered, she turned and noticed Lucifer. Her eyes made a quick and not so subtle scan of him, her cheeks lighting on fire when he smirked at her attentions. What a major A hole.
I crossed my arms and gave her a death glare. When she finally noticed me in the room her cheeks turned brighter and she stumbled over her words before leaving the room. I picked up the gown off of the hospital bed and looked around the room. I glanced at Lucifer who was watching me confused and I closed my eyes praying for the strength to get me through this.
“I need to change, mind leaving the room?” I asked him.
He grunted. “I’ve seen you before what’s the big deal? I’m not paying you any attention anyway.”
I groaned. “Seriously, can I have an ounce of privacy?” when he didn’t respond and instead took a seat in one of the empty chairs in the room I scrubb
ed a hand down my face.
I just needed to get through this appointment then I could go back to pretending he doesn’t exist. I stripped down to my underclothes while calling him all kinds of dirty words in my head. I was so frustrated that I couldn’t focus on what I was doing and was having unusual difficulty getting the gown open to put on. I growled and spared a glance at Lucifer hoping to burn him with my laser vision.
When my eyes landed on his face I frowned. His eyes were scanning my body up and down from head to toe. His eyes were dark and he licked his lips slowly. My legs quivered at his attentions and I only became more frustrated. I mean come on, I’m six months pregnant! My hormones have been high before, but being in his presence hasn’t exactly helped the urge. Not to mention that I refuse to lust after him so I’ve been totally unsated. Yes, I’m frustrated about my situation, frustrated at him, and sexually frustrated. From where I was currently standing it was a dangerous combination.
“Stop looking at me!” I hissed at him.
He grunted and didn’t bother moving his eyes. “Just finish doing whatever the fuck you’re supposed to be doing before someone walks in here and see’s you naked. You don’t want to cause a scene here now do you?” He asked arching an eyebrow.
“You’ve got some nerve…” I muttered under my breath as I practically forced the gown on and plopped on the bed. I waited until I was fully covered until I shimmied out of my underwear’s. When they reached my ankle and I sat up to swipe them off, Lucifer let out a growl. I decided not to entertain him.
Mrs. Silverman came into the room seconds later and I focused all my attention on her and what she was doing. “Well, hello there Ms. Bianchi, long time no see…” she began with an arched eyebrow.
I smiled shyly. “I went away for a while but I’d still been seeking prenatal care.” I comforted her.
She smiled and nodded and began reading my charts. “I haven’t received your paperwork so we need to go on and have a thorough look, make sure everything is all good. I do want you to do some additional tests just because we don’t have that on hand if you don’t mind?” she asked.
Abelie Page 6