I nodded. “Sure, whatever you need.”
“Let’s do this.”
She started with the normal vaginal exam, and I was extremely uncomfortable having this done with Lucifer’s probing eyes. Next was the sonogram. She covered me up, thank god and got the machine setup. When she applied the goo to my belly and placed the wand on my stomach she pressed a button and my baby’s heartbeat filled the silence in the room. Lucifer got out of his seat and came to stand at the side of the bed.
It seems like Alice just noticed his presence and offered him a smile. “Daddy?” she asked.
He removed his eyes from the screen just barely and gave her a nod before refocusing all of his attention to the monitor. “That’s the baby. He’s big.” He mentioned.
I looked up to Lucifer. His eyes were wide with wonder glued to the screen he was now leaning towards. I was fascinated with his enthusiasm. He looked down at me and for the first time in a long time his faced softened almost as if he was letting his guard down. “He’s real.” He whispered.
I felt my eyes tear up and offered him a nod. He used his thumb to wipe away the tears before they could make their way down my cheek.
When the sonogram was done, the doctor ran a bunch of other tests from blood and urine test to some other stuff I’m not totally sure were for. I just let her have at it, the best for the baby and all. We stayed around for an hour for the test results. It was extremely uncomfortable. While I was able to avoid his presence when we initially arrived he made sure to hover while we waited. I attempted to tune him out by reading magazines and baby books they had in the waiting area. He spent the whole time fiddling on his phone doing lord knows what.
When Dr. Silverman called us back in, the look on her face made me instantly worried. It wasn’t the usual happy smile that she gives me, she looked concerned.
“Alice?” I asked hesitantly.
She gestured to the chairs in front of her desk. “Please have a seat.”
Both Lucifer and I sat down and gave the doctor our undivided attention. “I’m a bit concerned here Abelie. I’m seeing high levels of consistent stress showing up in the tests. This is not good for the baby at all. One of the side effects if this continues is premature labor. It’s also been linked to babies being born smaller than they should or could impact brain development.”
I automatically held onto my stomach. She noticed the gesture and backtracked. “This can be fixed, if you know what the stressors are in your life work to decrease and eliminate them. I’m not saying that anything is going to happen you just need to know what could happen.” She explained.
My head cocked to the side and I was instantly pissed off. All the stress I’ve had since I’ve been pregnant has been associated to the man beside me. “Oh, I know what’s stressing me out…” I told her cutting my eyes to Lucifer.
She noticed the gesture and followed my gaze then cleared her throat. “If you two are having issues, I could refer you to a counselor that could help?” she suggested.
I immediately stood. “There’s no need, is there anything else?” I asked.
She studied us for a moment and sighed. “That’s all, but here…” she slid over a pamphlet. “Here, if you change your mind.”
I forced a smile and walked out of the hospital not sparing a glance at Lucifer. I couldn’t believe that this was happening. It’s like no matter what I did, we were destined for bad things.
When we got in the car Lucifer started it but didn’t pull off right away. “Am I really the reason for all of your stress?”
I instinctively scoffed and didn’t offer any further reply. That was the dumbest question I ever heard. The fact he had the nerve to even ask pissed me off.
Chapter 11
I was having stress issues and this bastard wanted to feign concern. Thanks to the doctor’s appointment I summoned, he’s taken it upon himself to keep me company. I don’t want him here, I want him out, I want this time to myself. He’s been hovering like a mother hen and the fact he’s been in this room with me for over an hour now was a bit unsettling. It was late out and naturally the party has begun downstairs but instead of being down there doing lord knows what, he’s made himself absolutely comfortable in that hard chair. Well, if he wants to stay here he can sit through one of my all-time favorite movies Cinderella. Now I’m not talking about the newer versions they’ve come out with. I mean the Disney original that I sang along to when I was 5.
For some reason, this movie was striking a cord in me that it’s never have before. I guess it’s because I empathized with her circumstance. Albeit I’m not being treated like a slave, I’m sure as heck being locked up somewhere I didn’t truly want to be.
By the time they ripped her dress to shreds to prevent her from going to the ball I was full on angry at her. “I don’t get it. Why didn’t she just leave, I mean what does she really have to lose by going out and finding her own.”
I was only thinking out loud so I was surprised when Lucifer spoke up. “Leaving isn’t always easy.”
I scoffed. “What the heck would you know about that?” I asked him.
“What would you?” he challenged.
“Breaking free of my dad’s reigns. My circumstances were different by far, but I wanted independence and freedom and eventually did what I had to do to get it.” I looked around the room. “At least when I had options to an extent anyways.”
Lucifer rolled his eyes at my comment. “You can in no way compare your life with hers. You’ve not a clue what it’s like to be treated like you don’t fucking matter. To be used for shit and have no control over any of it. Leaving your princess room to have an apartment on your own hardly qualifies for having it rough.”
He was pissing me off, what did he know about my life? “You’re one to talk? What would you know about it Mr. Perfect?” I asked him.
“A helluva lot more. I been there, done that. When you have to live on the streets and in fucking group homes… take care of yourself then you fucking tell me I aint got shit to say about being fucked over. Until then? Shut your fucking lips about shit you have no idea about.”
My head spun around to face him. Bull’s words came to my mind; I remember them like it was yesterday.
He nodded. “Best thanksgiving I ever had… probably Lucifer too.”
I frowned. “What do you mean? I mean, sure it was great but as a kid with your family… had to of been better.”
He shrugged. “Didn’t have a family kid. So no, I’ve never celebrated… it was nice. I’m looking forward to seeing what type of shit you’ve got going for the next holiday. I’m surprised Prez is letting you run wild like this.”
My heart broke for him. “What about Christmas? You haven’t even had a friend to exchange gifts with?” I asked.
He shook his head. “Can’t say that I have. Besides, the only real friends I had were on the same boat as me. By that time, it was pretty fucking clear there was more important shit to worry about.” He scanned my face and sighed. “Now don’t go giving me those pretty puppy dog eyes sugar. No need to feel sorry for me, that’s the last thing I want. I made out just fine.” He spread his arms out wide. “Do you not see how fucking sexy I am?” he joked.
In hindsight, he sort of insinuated that Lucifer hadn’t had it easy either but as we spoke I only thought of Bull. His words swirled in my head like an awful song being replayed constantly on the radio. Living on the streets… group homes? What the heck happened to this man? My heart instantly filled with sorrow and I dreaded saying anything to him about it but I couldn’t help not knowing. I mean, I’ve thought more often than not about his background. I mean he is the father of my child. I wanted to know everything about him especially since he’s hell bent on being involved.
“What happened to you?” I asked hesitantly.
His eyes met mine and they instantly hardened. The room suddenly dropped 50 degrees just from the coldness that was leaking off of him in waves. “None of ya fucking business.”
/>
There was one thing that has always kept me curious but I’d never had the courage to ask. “What does your tattoo mean?” I asked him softly.
He stood abruptly and pointed an angry finger at me. “Don’t you fucking listen? I told you to mind your damn business and the first thing you do is pry. Learn your fucking place and stay there you hear me? Don’t stick your nose in places they don’t fucking need to be.” He stalked to the door.
I stood up. “What do you mean it isn’t my business? I’m pregnant with YOUR child; I need to know things about you. It isn’t fair to keep it away from me! These are just honest questions and you’re in no place to withhold these answers from me.” He walked out the door to leave and I ran forward to stand in the doorway preventing him from closing it and effectively locking me out… or in. “You cannot close me out on this I need to freaking know! It’s obviously something and something important where you turned into a freaking freezer and clammed up on me.” Lucifer let go of the door and continued out. “Just tell me!” I demanded.
He looked back at me and when my eyes met his I knew he was somewhere else, somewhere far away. His eyes were on mine but they were distracted, almost like he was in a different place completely… totally unfocused. “FUCK. YOU.” Was the only response he gave me before he descended the stairs. I stood in the doorway glaring at his retreating figure until he was out of sight and the sound of the door downstairs slamming. In his haste to get away from me, he didn’t think to lock me in. I waited a couple of hours getting my wits together before I made the final decision to settle this. Game on Lucifer, I won’t let you run away from me this time.
I followed his path downstairs and out the door letting all the frustration and anger I had inside of me surface. When I opened the door, I had to take a step back as the music really filtered into my brain. It’s been a while since I’ve partied or anything and it was a minor shock to my senses. My eyes scanned the room looking for him and I spotted him by the bar with a glass in hand.
I moved through everyone crowding the room going mostly unnoticed. A few people gave me a quick greeting but I didn’t stop to chat, I was a woman on a mission. At some point while I was navigating through the room he turned so his back was now to me. I tapped him impatiently on the shoulder to get his attention. His entire body turned violently to face me and I noticed his free hand automatically clench into a fist, his face looked murderous. His body was tense like he was ready to spring almost as if he expected to beat the crap out of whoever dared touch him.
When his eyes focused on me his body relaxed but his look turned weary and annoyed. Too freaking bad because this was so going to happen. “What are you –“ He began but I didn’t let him finish. I already knew where he was going, same thing as usual… what am I doing outside of prison.
“You can’t just storm out in the middle of a conversation.” I said crossing my arms.
He looked at me amused. “Is that right? I think that’s exactly what I did.” I opened my mouth to respond but he kept going. “And you know why? Because as far as I’m fucking concerned the conversation is over.”
He went to turn back around and cut me off but I gripped his wrist stopping him. “Like hell it is… why would you think that?” I asked sarcastically. “Oh right, because Lucifer said so and we must do as he says or else.” I said taunting him.
Lucifer took a step towards me and his size was suddenly dwarfing me. He was pretty scary at the moment but I wouldn’t let him know he was intimidating me. I knew that was exactly what he was trying to do. “Cut your shit and go the fuck upstairs. I’m not doing this with you and you’re going to cause a scene. We’ve discussed this shit before girl, do I need to remind you?” when I only glared at him and didn’t make any effort in following his orders he frowned. He leaned down so that his mouth was by my ear. “Don’t forget that you aren’t exactly on my good list right now… and I haven’t exactly decided what I was going to do with your ass yet. It might do you some good to fucking remember that. You don’t want to know what I can do.”
My head reared back like he’d slapped me. Well that’s what it felt like so I guess it was appropriate. He just threatened me. Is he freaking kidding me? Well, if he was going to take me out then… “Do it.” I challenged.
He growled and his hand gripped my upper arm not quite to the point of pain but it was a deadly grip I knew I couldn’t escape unless he wanted me to. “Do as I fucking say.” He warned between clenched teeth. “Shut the fuck up, turn around and go back to where you came from.”
Maybe it was the hormones, possibly something else from the pregnancy that was coursing through my veins that made me unbelievably bold and made my emotions feel ten times stronger than normal. All I know is that the bomb inside of me that has slowly been ticking away exploded and I just reacted. I don’t even remember a rational thought passing through my mind.
My hand flew up and smacked the glass out his hand causing it to hit the floor and shatter. That same hand immediately drew back and landed a painful slap across Lucifer’s face if the sound of the blow made was any indication. He released me completely staring at me looking positively shocked. I faintly noticed my chest heaving as if I ran a marathon.
“I AM NOT ONE OF YOUR SOLDIERS! YOU CANNOT TRY TO KEEP ME IN LINE!” I screamed in his face while attempting to shove him back unsuccessfully as he was rooted to his spot. The screaming however seemed to snap him out of shock and the growl that came out him I swore shook the entire building.
I didn’t realize I was walking backwards until I watched as he took a step forward. His eyes darkened and I was suddenly afraid. In hindsight, I should’ve never been unafraid. Bull came up to Lucifer’s side looking ready to have to pull Lucifer off of my lifeless body.
Now you know when people say that in their last moments they see their entire life flash before their eyes? I kid you not, that is totally true. Not only that but in mere seconds I’d prayed that I’d be forgiven for every bad thing I’ve ever done in my life hoping upon hope I don’t end up in hell knowing one day I would see Lucifer again. This all happened in the time it took for his arm to fly up and his hand to wrap around my neck. My eyes instantly closed and I held my breath waiting for the grim reaper to appear and drag my soul away and I’d see my death unfolding in front of my eyes. Fine, I know super dramatic but what the heck do you really expect?!
It’s a normal body reaction to try to take in air when you need it. So imagine my surprise when I took one breath, then another. Even more surprising was that I was able to breathe easily. Sure, Lucifer still had a grip on my neck but he wasn’t strangling me. He was holding it with enough force to be threatening but not actually cause harm. I frowned and opened my eyes slowly. He was watching me curiously chest heaving.
“Did you just hit me?” he asked.
When I didn’t answer, he came closer until there was no space between us. “Did. You. Just. Fucking. Hit me?” he asked punctuating his words.
I gulped. “Ye… yes.” I stuttered out.
He shook his head. “I don’t know what I want to do with you…” he said not taking his eyes off of me. His hand flexed and I had to refrain from pissing myself. And I’ll tell you; with a baby practically sitting on my bladder resisting was not easy.
His other hand came up and gripped my ponytail and tugged. I felt pricks on my scalp from the strength as he forced my head back so I was looking up at him. He growled and then his lips were on mine. He wasted no time forcing his tongue into my mouth. He tasted of whiskey and just him. It’s been so long since I’ve been touched, let alone kissed. I let him control the kiss and take what he wanted. He didn’t give me a chance to object or fight him which I was grateful for because I wanted this. My god, I really really wanted this! However, if given the option I’d deny him because I knew it wasn’t right.
I can’t tell you how long we kissed but I didn’t want it to end. When he pulled back I fell into his chest. I could feel a light chuckle vibrating through
his body but I didn’t care. The next thing I knew, he scooped me up in his arms and was carrying me upstairs. The sounds of the guys hooting and wolf-whistling followed behind us. When he reached the landing, he made a left going for his room. This was new; normally we were always in my room. It made me curious but not enough to bring it up.
He placed me down gently on the bed and didn’t waste any time in ripping my pajama top off of me. You could hear the buttons bouncing off of lord knows what in his room. His hands found the waistband of my pants and swiftly removed them leaving me in nothing but my underwear. I expected him to just take those off too but instead he removed his cut and shirt and climbed on top of me. He kissed me slowly while his hands explored and caressed my body with gentle fingers. When his fingers trailed over my nipple my body shuttered and I whispered something unintelligible against his lips. He leaned back and looked at me curiously.
“The baby, they’re really sensitive.” I explained my face heating up in embarrassment.
He hummed in acknowledgement and he placed a kiss on my burning cheek. He continued placing soft kisses on my face then neck. He continued his decent raining kisses everywhere he passed, his five o’clock shadow leaving a trail in his wake. It was torturous pleasure. This was a brand new experience for me. Normally, it was all fire, strength, and passion with Lucifer. This… well I haven’t quite decided yet. When he reached my breast, he used his mouth and calloused hands to please me until I was a quivering mess. He placed kisses on my stomach while massaging it with careful fingers. When his eyes met mine his was full with wonder and I instantly felt tears prick my eyes. I had to look away or else the tears would’ve flowed and surely would’ve ruined the mood for him.
When he got to my center, he kissed and licked me through my underwear until slowly pulling them off… with. His. Teeth. I actually had to fight my orgasm because that was so hot. After he brought me over the edge a few times with his amazing oral skills he stood and removed his remaining clothes. He didn’t join me on the bed immediately, and instead stood there watching me… scanning me nonstop from head to toe.
Abelie Page 7