It Is What it Is

by Ivory B.

  “Damn, all I can say is I’m sorry ma. I feel kinda guilty.” “For what?” Ty asked looking straight at him. “Cause I feel like I jinxed you with the conversation we had earlier. You know about the job not showing you the same loyalty and whatnot.” Ty shook her head. “No it’s not your fault so don’t feel guilty. What I can’t understand is who would stoop so low as to call my job and try to get me fired?” Nice was silent for a while, then he said something that caught Ty’s attention. “I got just the right hoodrat bitch in mind with a whole lotta time on her hands to do some ignorant shit like this; Mia.” Gosh why do we think so much alike? Ty thought to herself. “Bae you don’t know that for sure so don’t go accusing her. Plus, in all honesty none of the messages sounded like her anyways. Let’s be real when we decided to follow our hearts and say fuck what everybody else had to say we didn’t make one person mad we made a few mad. Shit I still got Nona running around Philly talkin reckless about me to anyone who would listen. Who knows maybe it was somebody that knew Douglas or knows his family, you just never know,” Ty tried to reason sounding as if she were trying to convince herself as well. Nice wasn’t buying it though, he had a feeling he had the right person in mind.

  Nice pulled Ty closer to his chest. “Everything will be a’ight that’s my word,” Nice assured her. Ty shook her head believing it would be. Nice said those words with such conviction it was hard to believe anything else. “Ty you know what you super talented why don’t you try to go into business for ya’self instead of working for somebody who doesn’t appreciate you?” Ty gave a half smile. “That’s big baby, really big. You know the company I work for is huge in the financial industry. If I break out on my own I won’t have the clientele. I’ll be basically starting off with nothing. Not to mention costs, where am I going to get the capital to start a financial company?” Nice smiled “Ty let’s just say, I know some people that know some people that can bring you the clientele you used to working with.” Ty chuckled. “Okay Mr. Connections what about the start up money for the business?” Nice looked into her eyes with a very serious expression. “Ty I told you I got you.” Ty was speechless she opened her mouth but nothing came out at first. “Bae I can’t take that type of money from you.” Nice shook his head with disappointment written all over his face. He wished sometimes Ty wasn’t so prideful, he wished she’d let him take care of her but she was the type that didn’t know how to sit back and be a kept woman. “A’ight the offer still stands if you ever change your mind.” “Thank you for believing in me that much.” Ty said before capturing his lips to kiss him deeply. His faith in her made her want him more than she ever had before right now. “Umm,” Nice moaned when Ty bit his bottom lip. “Damn girl you don’t get enough of this sugar cane do you?” “Nope, you know I got a sweet tooth,” Ty said right before mounting him.

  Nice’s assumptions were completely accurate. It was Mia and her friends who made the calls to Ty’s job. Finding out where she worked wasn’t hard at all. Ky would often come home with little freebies from Ty’s job. Little promotional items like teddy bears with the company’s logo and name on it, pens, notebooks, and even a coffee mug. Mia was cleaning the house one day found a pen with the telephone number on it and called the number. She knew both Ty’s first and last name so she asked to speak to Ty’s manager and it was on like butter popcorn from that point on.

  Mia would get high and call Ty’s job along with her girls. They would call the job multiple times a day from different cell phones getting entertainment out of it. They even had Freeze make a debut as a drug dealer who Ty owed a debt to for some drugs. The shit was pure comedy to Mia and her girls. Mia didn’t care about tarnishing Ty’s name or her career. That’s exactly what she aimed to do. She wanted to ruin Ty like Ty was trying to ruin her. Ever since Nice started messing with Ty he been on some brand new shit. And Mia was almost certain it was Ty in Nice’s ear that had him acting funny with money. If Ty wanted war Mia was going to give it to her.

  Where Did My Baby Go?

  Los walked into the house feeling as low as the swag in his walk. He was feeling dejected and coming home wasn’t exactly exciting for him anymore. The house had a strangeness to it, coldness; he wasn’t used to since Lucky been gone. When she was here it was as if she breathed life into this big house, now it was just big and lifeless. He had slept in his apartment in the city for the last two days. Coming home to an empty house didn’t seem all that appealing lately. Flicking on the lights in the kitchen he half wished he noticed something different about the house that would indicate Lucky was home, unfortunately nothing had changed since he’d left. He walked deeper into the kitchen carrying a container of beef and broccoli from the Chinese restaurant that he’d ordered for dinner earlier in the day. He was so engrossed in his own pity party that he didn’t notice Peanut Butter until he felt light pawing on his spiked out high-top Louboutin sneaks. He looked down and Peanut Butter let out a loud wail. Carlos recognized that cry PB was hungry. He looked over to PB’s food and water bowls and both were empty. “Damn! Lucky really gon kill my black ass,” Los spat as he ran to the pantry only to discover the dog was out of dog food as well. He looked down at the Chinese food container in his hand, Lucky had been so against giving PB table food. At this point though it was either table food or the little critter might die of starvation. There was no store open at this hour of the night close enough for him to run out and purchase dog food so real food it was. Los opened up the plastic container and scooped up a large piece of beef dropping it on the floor. Peanut Butter massacred it, eating it all up and even licking the sauce from the floor. “Dayuum!” Los said in amusement. He dropped a large helping of food on the floor then retrieved Peanut Butter’s water bowl to fill it as well. Carlos watched the tiny dog go to town on the food and found amusement at how that little dog could put food away. What he didn’t realize at the time but would discover later on was that the dog’s first experience with real food wouldn’t end all that well. PB would later get sick to his stomach and shit in different places throughout the house.

  Los walked into his room and grabbed a pillow from the bed then headed straight to the separate sitting area and lay across the couch. In the time Lucky been gone he’d tried to sleep in the bed they once shared and never seemed to be able to get a good night sleep without her. Tonight he wouldn’t even put himself through the torture of tossing and turning, instead he flopped down on the plush couch face down, kicked off his sneakers, put a pillow over his head and tried to doze off. Right as he was drifting into a comfortable sleep he jerked his hand back as Peanut Butter rubbed his head against his hand that was hanging off the couch. Los flung the pillow off his head and looked down at the dog. PB looked pitiful, downright depressed; PB laid on his stomach with his tiny paws in front of him looking up at Los, his black button shaped eyes showing sadness all through them. “Yeah I know, I’m feeling it too son. I miss her too.” Los said to the dog as if PB could comprehend what he was talking about. Los smiled once he noticed what he was doing. Lucky really got me fucked up in the game if I’m sitting here talking to a furry ass gremlin. Los had to really sit and laugh at his situation.

  The next morning Carlos woke up with a hard-on that could cut granite. He missed Lucky but his manz and em missed her even more. His dick was painfully hard and the muscles in his back and neck were tense from sleeping on the couch. Mornings were a killer especially when he woke up with a hard-on he couldn’t relieve. He headed to the fully equipped gym to work out some of the tension he was feeling in his body and to try and get his mind off some much needed sex. There was only so much a porno stash could do for a nigga. The only thing that was holding him down in Lucky’s absence was the home movies they made. He had them on heavy rotation in the Playstation. He was literally raping the shit out of the replay button on the remote.

  Los ran on the treadmill and bench pressed until his body was hurting too much to think about anything else but the pain he was feeling physically, which wasn’t
anything in comparison to the hurt he was feeling in his heart. Carlos couldn’t believe Lucky had upped and left him. A part of him wanted to say fuck it and rock on but deep down he knew he couldn’t. Low-key he was stressin and worried that Lucky was really somewhere out here pregnant with his seed and not taking care of herself. He knew she had to be just as messed up without him as he was without her. Maybe she wasn’t pregnant at all, maybe it was wishful thinking but he couldn’t get the scene of her throwing up the morning after they made those sex tapes out of his head. After torturing himself in the gym he took a cold shower and beat off while he was in there. In Los’ opinion this whole situation was embarrassing for a nigga of his caliber to have to resort to beating his own meat. He hadn’t done this since he was in his preteens. What else was he to do? He loved Lucky and was trying to be loyal; it wasn’t easy though especially when he let his mind wonder to thoughts of Lucky possibly being out there with another nigga. If she was fuckin somebody else they were done; there would be no coming back from a situation like that. A part of him knew better than to doubt her loyalty but when he thought back on the dirt he did in the past it made him less confident. Nah Lucky wouldn’t be out here giving my love away he tried to assure himself.

  After taking a long cold shower he dressed and was on his way out when Peanut Butter came running towards him yipping at his feet and wagging his tail feverishly. In the past the two were more like enemies, both fighting for the attention and affection of Lucky. Since her absence they had no other choice but to deal with each other. Los looked down at the dog “What?” PB looked up at him with those big black eyes wagging his tail anxiously. “Yo watch out, I’ll be back.” Los said reaching for the doorknob. The dog let out a painful howl as if he were crying. For some reason Los felt a little bad for the furry critter, he knew PB hadn’t been outside besides slipping out of his doggy door to relieve himself, he’d literally been cooped up in the house alone. “Aight, aight damn you can roll but I swear if you pee in my new whip I will throw ya lil furry ass out the window while I’m driving down the highway, we good on that shit?” The dog twitched his ear, to Los that was a sign that he understood clearly. “Come on,” Los said grabbing the dog up and carrying him to the car.

  Los pulled up in front of the record company and rushed to open the back door so that Peanut Butter could get out. The whole ride over Los was type nervous the dog would pee in his Benz. PB yipped and ran back and forth in the backseats the entire ride over. He placed PB on the ground and walked off expecting the dog to follow him inside. When Carlos didn’t hear the dog approaching he looked back and watched as the dog walked as if he were an astronaut. He remembered then that Lucky rarely let the dog walk on the pavement in the city. She usually carried him around in designer dog bags. Los came to the conclusion that if he wanted to ever make it in the building he would be better off picking PB up. He scooped Peanut Butter up and carried him in the building all awhile fussing under his breath at the dog. “Ayo you got me lookin fruity as fuck carrying you right now.” As soon as he stepped in the building a few females that worked in the front office swarmed, oohing and aahing over the puppy. “Ooh he is so cute. Whose dog is this? Can I hold him?” were a few of the questions Los heard. Los didn’t answer anything he passed the dog over with a polite smile and kept it moving. He could never figure out what female’s fascination with little dogs was.

  By the time he made it into the privacy of his own office he was exhausted. Los was running his hand over his waves exhaling hard when Nice barged into his office taking his usual seat in front of Los’ desk. Los looked over at his brother and raised an eyebrow. This nigga act like he don’t have his own office. “What up son? What’s good?” Nice asked looking down at his Iphone. “My dick, that’s what’s up.” Nice raised his eyes from his phone and looked over at Los as he continued to vent. “I can’t find my wifey, she done up jumped ship and left the Captain. A nigga been resorting to jackin off in cold showers damn near every morning. So I’m sitting here tryna contemplate if gettin head is considered cheatin. I’m tryna do right by Luck cause she my heart but yo it’s gettin hard, there’s only so much porno’s can do for a nigga,” Los sighed and shook his head. He felt relieved that he had gotten his current predicament off his chest. He looked over at Nice who was momentarily speechless. Nice had asked how Los was doing out of courtesy. He had no idea Los was really going to spill his guts. “Damn, that’s real, real talk. Tell em why you mad son. Tell em why you mad,” Nice said through a chuckle. Los shook his head there was no use in trying to talk to Nice sometimes, he was too used to clowning all the time. Nice caught Los’s expression. “Nah, nah, I’m fuckin wit you relax, on some real shit you know damn well gettin dome is cheatin. I know you tryna stay on ya dean wit Luck, do the right thing and all but…this shit crazy,” Nice said shaking his head from side to side. “I guess you gotta ask ya’self this, is gettin head or some quick pussy worth losing Luck? But at the same time…I feel you; it’s been a minute since she been gone. Chicks stay on that crazy shit they get mad and wanna cut you off completely, Yo Ty be tryna pull that shit too, she catch an attitude and be on some shit like she ain’t in the mood. I’m like what you being mad at me got to do with you being on ya job and fuckin me? We ain’t gotta be cool for you to handle ya duties as my woman. We both mad at each other cool we can angry fuck. You know that sex when chicks be fighting to stay silent and shit, they don’t wanna scream out or make noises cause they so called mad.” Los burst out laughing because he knew exactly what Nice was talking about. “Lucky better get her ass back here and get on her job before you find a temp. All I can say is if you gonna do you please and I repeat please don’t get caught out. I don’t wanna be singing this is for my Homie at your wake if Luck finds out.” Los chuckled. “Lucky gotta be coming home soon, until then do like them niggaz do in the bing, get a baggie, fill it with some jelly and fuck it.” Los gave Nice the ‘what the fuck look’. Nice shrugged his shoulders “What? Desperate times call for desperate measures” “I’m not even gon ask how you know some crazy shit like that. I know all about desperate time’s mah G trust me when I say but I ain’t fuckin no bag of jelly. The only thing holdin me down right now is them homemade videos. Bruh if I ain’t have that as a constant reminder of what I have in Lucky a nigga woulda been out here on some hoe shit, giving dick away like it was Halloween candy, ” “Halloween candy? You silly as hell, you woulda been giving these bitches straight tricks and treats ha?” Nice said cracking up laughing “But hole up, home videos! Say word, Luck did a video? Damn I can’t even get Ty to let me take a few pics.” “Yeah I’ma show you how to do this son.” Los boasted as if he had anything to do with the initial video they made when in all actuality it was Lucky’s surprise to him. That first video resulted in them making another and another. Nice shook his head with a smile on his face looking at Los in amazement like he was really that dude.

  A serious expression took over Los’ face suddenly. He felt kinda foolish asking this but he knew if he could be real with anyone it was with his right hand man and brother. They had a serious no flex zone type of relationship, there was never the need of bravado when dealing with each other. “Ayo you think Luck moved on me? I mean…I’ll feel like a lame if I’m here keepin it ahunnit in her absence and she out there doing her, I ain’t moved on or stepped out on her cause the love still there but…” Los dropped his head and shook it from side to side with stress lines etched into his forehead. If no one else got Los Nice did; he wasn’t really going to cheat he just didn’t want to look stupid in the event Lucky already had. Nice looked at Los for a few long seconds pondering his question before answering.

  “Nah, I don’t think she out here doing her, I know you can’t put nothing past nobody but I can’t see Lucky cheating on you. Chicks, well ones like Lucky they wired differently. Like us niggaz we know how to separate sex from feelings. We can smash something with no feelings involved and keep it movin. Chicks like Lucky though they ain’t gon let a
nigga hit if they ain’t got no type of emotional connection or feelings for him, nah mean? And we both know you got Lucky’s heart. So no I can’t see her stepping out and doing her.” Nice’s response really put Los at ease, that’s what big brothers were for though. Los sat there in silence looking as if he were in deep thought. Nice could see the stressed look on Los’ face and he felt for his man.

  In Nice’s opinion Lucky was really out of pocket for this whole situation and he couldn’t blame Los for entertaining the thought of rockin on. Nice was all for Lucky and Los being together, a complete stranger could see the love they had for each other when they were together; it made you want to root for their love to survive. But Lucky had major trust issues and she was putting his brother through it. Maybe this break is what they really needed to put everything in perspective and get back on track, although he hated seeing his brother like this maybe it was for the best. “Ayo Los,” Nice said breaking Los out of his thoughts “Let a nigga hold that,” Nice said trying to contain a smile. “Hold what?” Los asked with a raised brow. “Let me hold that tape nigga?” Los broke out into a wide smile “Maannn get the fuck outta here!” Los boasted and both men broke out into laughter simultaneously.

  Before Los knew it hours had flown by and now Real, Jah and Meat had joined him and Nice in his office. Peanut Butter ran around Los’ office sniffing and poking his paws everywhere while the men in the room had a little smoke session. Los was folded over holding his stomach laughing at Nice going in on Jah. “You about the most pussy whipped ass thug I know. For real, you gon let Keema run up on you wit a razor and not do shit?” “Go head wit that shit Keema wasn’t gon do nothing. On top of that right after she gave a nigga some Uh-mazing head.” “Yeah you keep screamin that shit lil nigga, next thing you know you won’t have a dick to get no Uh-mazing head wit fuckin around with Keema crazy ass and razors. You should already know by now after she done cut up ya clothes and kicks that Keema don’t need to be around sharp objects,” Nice said. “Stop tryna play me. You know Keem wasn’t gon really do nothing, y’all know how Keema get,” Jah said trying to defend his wife. “Yeah we know,” Real said. “We def know how she get,” Nice added under his breath. Los looked straight ahead as if something caught his eye while trying to refrain from laughing. Jah looked around the room at the four men and saw the sarcastic looks on their faces. “Ayo, y’all ain’t gon keep talking greasy about my wife.” The room erupted in laughter. “Nah, you know we fucks wit Keem but drama is definitely her middle name though,” Nice said through laughter. Jah mumbled something inaudible under his breath as he took another hard tote from his blunt with his face all screwed up. They were only messing with Jah because they knew he got so sensitive over anyone saying something about Keema.