He hops out of bed, buck naked, with his dick still semi-hard, I might add, and bounds into the bathroom. When he comes back he has something clasped in the palm of his hand. Tucking the sheet around me, I move from the bed to stand in front of it. “A present for me?” I ask, innocently, batting my eyes and cocking my head to the side coquettishly.
“I thought he was fucking crazy. He romanticizes love to the point of fictionalization, but he’s right, God damn it. He’s right about this,” Cody says, making no sense.
I quirk one brow. “Who?”
“It doesn’t matter.” He hits one knee, still naked, and says, “This was supposed to be your wedding band. I designed it myself. I won’t ask you to marry me because that time for us has passed. Keeping in tune of our time and space, I’m just asking you outright to be my wife. Right now.” He extends a small, diamond encrusted band to me. I swallow, wipe away a tear, and walk toward him.
“Am I wife material?” I ask, smiling.
“It doesn’t matter to anyone except me and you’re the only woman I’ve ever wanted to be my wife. There will never, not even in my wildest dreams, be another woman I want to be linked to for all of eternity. I stake my life on this claim.”
“Then yes. I am your wife,” I say, extending my left hand to him so he can slip the band on my finger. The morning light hits it just so, and it sparkles brilliantly, like a million rainbows finally showing their faces upon people who desperately need happiness. “That was the best non-proposal ever. It was hard to keep my eyes off your dick, though. I might like that better than bling,” I say, kneeling in front of him and wrapping my hands around his neck.
“I love you so much, Cody. I’ll be the best woman for you I can possibly be.” I press my lips against his.
He shakes his head. “All I want is you. Be you, Lainey, and I’ll be the happiest man on the planet.” Flaws and all, this man loves me without reservation. Cody deepens the kiss, using his tongue and tilting my head back with his hands.
“Get dressed, Cody. We need to finish this deal as soon as possible and if you don’t put on pants I’m liable to glue your dick inside my pussy and keep it there for sixty-two hours straight,” I reply.
He shakes his head. “How did I get so lucky? I found the only woman on the planet who talks about gluing my manhood inside of herself and it doesn’t turn me off, it gives me wood so hard I could cut steel.”
I chuckle. “I’ll be here all day, but seriously. We should go. I’ve lost you once and I’m not doing it again. Time is of the essence.” I pull on my outfit from yesterday and throw him a pair of jeans that I find hanging over a chair in his room. The huge plate glass window is a one-sided mirror. We can look over the crazy beautiful city, but no one can see in. It’s an ideal feature when your ass is pressed against the glass while you’re being screwed to perfection, if you ask me. I scroll on my cell phone, looking for the information I need, and quickly find it. “Good. They’re open.”
Cody pulls on his pants and leaves them unbuttoned in that fantastic way that super buff guys do. So nonchalant and effortless, but it drives women batshit crazy. He ruffles his hands through his hair. “If I’m not even showering, you’ll have to humor me and tell me where we’re going.” He’s right. I need to at least wash my face. I rush into the bathroom and tell him it’s a secret. He walks up behind me while my eyes are closed and my face covered in soap that smells like him. “I have one more thing for you,” Cody says, twining his hands around my waist and pulling me back against him.
“This is hardly fair. I’m blind right now,” I exclaim, trying and failing to rinse my face without splashing water all over the exquisite countertop.
“Finish here. I’ll go get it.”
I look in the huge mirror above his sink and find myself barefaced and…happy. So happy, that I want to scream it to the world. This is how I’m supposed to feel. In Cody’s world, wrapped in his sheets and arms for the rest of time.
When I exit the bathroom Cody’s entering the bedroom with something behind his back. He’s dressed, his blond hair is coifed with water, and he tells me to close my damn eyes again. “Hurry, hurry!” I say, closing my eyes and stomping one heeled foot. “We need to go!”
He says, “Open them.”
I do and I come face to face with the dog. The same one he gave me on our first Valentine’s Day together. The same one I soaked with tears when he died. The very same one I buried in his coffin when they couldn’t find his body. It’s a trivial, cheap, black dog that he picked up from a toy store on his way home from work that cold night in February. I, of course, loved it because even as an adult, getting a soft fuzzy animal lights you from the inside. “Dog,” I say, taking the mangy thing from his hands. His moniker is very original. I look up at Cody’s face. “Where did you get him?” I ask.
“They gave me my things back that were in my coffin. It was like the time capsules we buried in elementary school. When I saw Dog I knew I should keep him. I can’t believe you put him in there. How did he breathe?” Cody asks, chuckling. “The whole business of dying but not really is exhausting.”
How odd must that have been for him. To be able to look at the things given to a dead man. “I loved that dog. It was the one thing tangible that reminded me of you most. I figured if I couldn’t bury your body, this would have to do. Lame, I know.” Saying it out loud is embarrassing. I love you and I’m burying a stuffed animal in your place. Jesus save my horrid soul.
He cradles my face in his hand and brushes my hair behind both of my ears. Tilting my face up to his, he says, “It’s not lame at all. The memory stick of code you threw in there? Bought Dances like the Wind,” he says, ushering me out of the apartment and down the hall to the elevator. I never thought much about putting that in there. It was his. What would I do with it? I don’t even know how to read code. Or open the encrypted data. To me it was just another memento that represented a facet of his personality.
“No shit?” I ask when we get on the elevator. “So basically my lack of knowledge about what was on that stick afforded the mansion in the Hamptons?” Cody nods, laughs at my expression, and tucks me to his side. I do a little dance in the lobby as we head out the door and into the cool morning. I know exactly where we need to go, so I hail a cab, raising one hand in the air.
Cody just smiles when he hears me give the cabbie the address. Shaking his head, he says, “You really couldn’t have told me before we left the house?” He motions down to his jeans and long-sleeved tee.
“What? You’re hot. No way. It’s better this way. They open at nine a.m. and we need to be there before it gets too busy.”
The yellow cab pulls in front of the huge, columned building and lets us out at the steps. “The courthouse. You want the husband and wife to be official. Right now? You’re ready for that?” I haven’t been more ready for anything in my life.
I hold out my hands, palms up. “I’m not shaking, my palms aren’t sweaty. Go ahead, touch them,” I say. He smirks, but humors me. “I’m already wearing your wedding band. Let’s do this, Cody. Finish what we started before life got in the way.”
Holding my hands on the steps of the beautiful, old courthouse, to a passerby it looks like we’re saying our vows. “It’s our time, right?” I ask.
Cody kisses me as a response. Wrapping his arms around my body, he pulls me to him and then up off the ground. His lips are warm against mine and they’re curled in a smile. “This is the best decision you’ve ever made.”
“Better than all the furniture I picked out? I’m mollified, Cody Ridge.”
“Let’s do this, Fast Lane. I love you.”
So we do. We fill out paperwork until we’re blue in the face and also a waiver, because you can’t get married in NYC the same day as the marriage license is granted without one, and we get married. It’s held in a small room with tacky plastic flowers hanging on the walls and carpet that looks like it has seen a billion pairs of feet. The woman marrying us is a twin. Her
sister is our witness, and she smiles as we seal our lives together for the rest of time. Cody kisses me chastely when she pronounces us husband and wife and they both clap overzealously. It makes us laugh, kiss again, and clutch each other tightly. Cody picks me up around my bottom and spins me around in a circle. Everything else fades away.
“You’re my wife,” he says, his grip tight, sure.
“And you’re my husband,” I reply, feeling adrenaline swirl around my body. Sheer happiness is the best rush. The look in his eyes, now that I’m officially his, is one of pure rapture.
He lowers me down until we’re eye to eye, nose to nose. “Forever,” he whispers, before his lips find mine.
The twins clap some more, and I get lost in his kiss, his love for me, knowing that when he says forever, he means it.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Cody
Two years later
THE THINGS THAT happen when you’re busy making plans are what form your life. If you wait for the next weekend, or a time when you’re less busy, or perhaps ‘next time’, you’re squirreling away precious moments that could be better spent by just saying ‘yes’. Because of our sordid, nefarious past, I try to always say yes to Lainey. It makes the positivity rain. And when it rains positivity I’m likely to get whatever I want as well. We live in Dances like the Wind, because she loves the house and I can’t deny her anything she loves. Our two years of marriage have been bliss. For me, this time with her has been better than any expectations I had for marriage. She tells me she feels the same way. It’s easy to love a person when you’ve lost them before. You appreciate them more, you embrace and cherish every millisecond you get. Lainey Ridge is my biggest blessing that started off as my biggest curse.
Our past rarely comes up. Her spy work comes up only if there’s a funny anecdote she wants to tell, or if I ask her specific questions. She’s an open book. Lainey wanted to talk about my time in captivity. It was a conversation we had only once. I spoke for over an hour about my life and several things that happened to me while I was there, and it ended with her clinging to me like a koala and soaking my shirt with guilty tears. Believe it or not, I don’t blame her for my kidnapping. Sure, Vadim’s reason for taking me was to spite Lainey, but I’m a fucking Navy SEAL. It’s my fault they took me. My unpreparedness caused it. She doesn’t blame herself like she used to. I think that’s the main reason she stayed away from me for those limbo inducing six months. She was giving herself permission to forgive, forget, and move on.
Since our wedding we’ve discovered things about each other. Every day, and every year, it’s something new. Sometimes it’s good, like the fact that Lainey knows how to plunge a toilet in the middle of the night better than me, and sometimes it’s bad news, like when the doctor told us that I’m unable to have children. Vadim stole something else from me with the endless hours of torture. I was mad at first, because it was something Lainey wanted and I couldn’t give it to her. When I got my head out of my ass and actually started listening to her, and the word ‘adoption’ that she kept saying, I realized not all hope was lost.
It’s been a long, drawn-out process to come to this day—the day when we’ll be able to call this little boy, Evan, our real son. He will belong to us legally as much as he’s already captured our hearts. Evan is one of the children I rescued from the dingy room in Mexico. His huge sad eyes that were too big for his face and held more sadness than a child had any right to have, stayed with me. When we decided to adopt, I knew who I wanted, and it just so happened that he wanted me, too. Molly was able to dig up the information we needed, and so it started. We entered the system as his foster parents. For a tiny child of barely three, his eyes told a different story. A couple of years later, and he’s just like any other child, maybe even a little too doted on.
“Do you think we have enough balloons and cake? Evan loves cake. Maybe he would like to have two? Can you move that stack of presents into the other room before he comes down for breakfast, honey?” Lainey asks. I sigh and do her bidding, returning just in time to see Evan at the top of the stairs about to descend the banister on his arse.
“Your mommy will have a fit if she sees you. You could get hurt,” I explain. Evan’s eyes light up when he sees me. Cuppie, his gray raggy blanket, goes down the banister and he bounds down the stairs into my arms.
The gray rag is a steadfast in our world, but he needs it less and less. He leaves it at the bottom of the stairs. I carry him into the kitchen, his warm body, fresh from his covers, pressed against my chest. It’s the second best feeling in the world. He hops down and crosses the kitchen in several small bounds when he sees Lainey, and I have to smile because this boy is so enamored with her that he could be her biological child.
“Sweet boy!” she exclaims as he runs into her arms. She picks him up even though he’s getting too big for that and peppers his face with kisses. “How did you sleep?”
Evan hops down and climbs up a stool to sit at the breakfast bar. “I slept good, Mommy. I get to have the party today?” he asks.
Sitting next to him, I ruffle his hair. He leans against me. “Yep. All for you, buddy. You’re stuck with us forever now,” I say. Lainey squeals in excitement.
“I’m so excited, Evan. Everyone will be here any moment. The adult paperwork was finalized last night. You are Evan Ridge, most awesome kid to ever grace the planet,” Lainey quips. She’s sworn off swearing. Mostly when he’s not around she’ll drop an F bomb here and there. It’s a novelty now. I tease her for it.
“He’s going to let it go to his head, Fast Lane. Give the boy some breakfast and let us do man stuff. I’m sure you’re going to make us wear those leg cages again.”
She scowls at me as she places a plate of eggs and fruit in front of Evan. “They are skinny jeans,” Lainey says, correcting my terminology.
“You know my thighs don’t fit in skinny jeans. They are cages for my thighs. And Evan can’t jump on the trampoline well with his on. Right, buddy?”
Evan swallows a bite of food. “He’s right, Mommy. Can we wear gym shorts?”
Oh, yes. Allied forces unite. Lainey looks like she’s honestly considering letting him wear gym shorts, but her fashion sense wins out in the end. She tells him that his corduroys will do instead. Me? I get to wear whatever jeans I want. I celebrate with a fist pump and kiss my woman so thoroughly that I dip her backward. Her blonde hair falls in a cascade toward the floor. It’s long again. The caveman in me approves.
The caterers arrive and the guests trickle in. Evan is celebrated properly. Maverick, Windsor, and their brood arrive fashionably late. Evan is excited to show the kids his new toys and they hurry off to play somewhere less adult.
Maverick slaps me on the back. “What a happy day, man. You guys are so lucky. He is a great kid. Really something special,” he says. Windsor leaves his side to bring a bottle of champagne and a wrapped gift to a table in the far corner. Maverick watches her walk away, shaking his head, like he can’t wait for her to come back. And then promptly have her for lunch.
“Nothing ever happens how you think it should, does it? Evan came to us by unconventional means after our unconventional relationship. He’s the biggest joy in my life,” I say, pressing my lips into a thin line. “Thanks for everything, Mav. Nothing probably would have happened otherwise. I’d still be sitting alone in my apartment, waiting for her to call. You and your dick moves that end up being awesome. You’re the king of that, aren’t you?”
He smiles. “Let’s put it this way. I know a thing or two about second chances. Rarely does waiting benefit them. I’m glad I could be of service, brother,” Mav says. I owe him, but he’d never let me pay him back. Real friends never expect payment. They’re happy to make you happy. Windsor comes back, kisses his cheek, and smiles sweetly at him. She congratulates me on the official adoption with a small hug. She has tears in her eyes. Today has been far more emotional than I imagined it would. He’s been ours for a while now. Just because it’s offici
al shouldn’t make me feel any less different, love him any more, but I think I might. Molly, Horse, and Van stop by and Evan is excited to see them. They’re like his aunt and uncles. The fun ones who bring horrible gifts like Play-Doh and goopy games you only play once because of the mess they make. Today is no different, and Evan is excited to try out his new science kit in the kitchen. Lainey’s eyes widen when she sees him trying to climb the counter to the stove. I laugh.
Ridge Contracting functions without me. They are more than capable of running things themselves. No one ever talks about Vadim or the largest cover-up in RC’s history. Maybe that’s part of the cover-up. Not talking about it. I owe them, too. I check in every once in a while because it bears my name, but I’ve given up the fast lane completely. Aside from hitting our home gym daily, nothing else is at the receiving end of my fury. It’s nice. It’s odd. It’s what I want. Lainey still has her interior design business, but has slowed down to be around for Evan. We could easily afford nannies and babysitters, but she will have none of that. He’s hers. She reminds me of that all the time. To which I promptly respond, he’s mine, too. She relents then. It usually earns me a blow job, or the equivalent of an extreme orgasm.
I slip away from the party and head up to my office. It’s huge and light, at Lainey’s insistence. I want to give Evan something today, and I need to find Dog. I know he’ll love it. It’s old and torn up just like Cuppie. He’ll love it just as much as Lainey does. I unlock a wooden cabinet that’s in the bookshelf and pull out Dog. The rest of the things that Lainey put in my coffin are nestled safely inside here. There’s a picture of us when we dated all those years ago. We look like children, but I know why she picked this photo. We’re looking at each other and smiling like mad. It was taken by a passerby during the same trip when I proposed to her. Behind that is a sealed envelope I’ve never been able to open. It’s a letter from Lainey to me composed after I was pronounced dead. I only know this because she told me when I asked. A more curious man would have opened it sooner, but maybe I wanted to have everything first, to combat the nothingness she felt when she wrote this. Today, I have everything, so I open it and find her neat handwriting filling the page.
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