All We Are (The Six Series Book 5)

by Sonya Loveday

  Later, when I felt myself beginning to drift, I heard him say, “I could go to sleep right now.”

  “Mmm,” I answered, allowing my eyes to close briefly.

  “Who’s hungry?” Allyson said from somewhere above me as small drops of icy water hit my skin. I tried to sit up, but there was an arm draped over me. It pulled me hard against a warm chest, the owner of it nuzzling his face into my neck with random mumbled words.

  “Tell ya what… Alex and I will be below deck changing. Come get us when you’re ready to leave,” she said, padding off as quietly as she’d approached.

  I came fully awake when Josh’s hand found my breast and grazed his thumb against the pebbled tip—a leftover reaction from the water Allyson had dripped on me.

  “Josh…” I pulled his hand away and rolled onto my stomach so I could get my knees under me to stand.

  He rolled, pinning me to the deck, body pressing against my back.

  “Josh!” I said his name, trying not to speak too loud, but wanting to get his attention.

  He moved against me, muddling my thoughts. Making me want things I’d long denied myself. I had to put a quick end to it before it got out of hand.

  “Josh,” I hissed his name again, but wherever he was in his dreams, he couldn’t hear me.

  His body was strung tight. It resonated with a vibration that shuddered through me. Want and need hammering in his veins. I knew it only because it echoed in my own. If I didn’t stop him, there would be no turning back. No undoing it.

  His hand moved, fingers digging into my hips. His own hips pushed against my backside.

  “Josh, wake up. You need to wake up.” I rolled as much as I could from one hip to the other.

  He woke with a suddenness that startled us both. With one move, he was on his knees. I rolled over, sitting up and watching him scrub his hands down his face with a groan.

  “Josh?”

  He jerked back, shot to his feet, and then dove over the side of the boat.

  I scrambled over to the side and watched him swim underwater, silvery bubbles trailing behind him and popping at the surface. He came up for a breath, and then went back down again several times before returning to the boat.

  I met him at the top of the ladder, but he wouldn’t even look at me.

  I moved back, giving him room to board, and then he turned his back and pulled the ladder up. His shoulders were set with tension as he stored the ladder. I followed him and stood right behind him, forcing him to look at me when he turned around. “I can’t pretend to know what’s going on inside your head; I won’t even try. But whatever it is? Let it go for now before they come up and wonder what the hell happened. Okay?”

  He nodded, still unable to look at me. I felt a pang of regret in my gut. It wasn’t easy. Not for either of us.

  “Josh.” I said his name softly, stepping closer to him, reaching for his arm.

  “Aren’t you two the sweetest,” Allyson said as she came up behind me.

  “What are you doing up here?” I asked, sounding more than a little annoyed. “I thought you were waiting below until I came and got you.”

  She shrugged, twisting her hair over her shoulder. “Couldn’t help it. Caught a glimpse of you two a little earlier and wowza. Your restraint is commendable, Josh, but you didn’t need to hold back on our account. We would have left you alone.”

  I felt the heat of embarrassment light up my face. “Says the voyeur who was watching us,” I snapped.

  She blew me off with a wave. “Total accident. Got turned around down there and thought I was looking out over the back of the boat.”

  I placed my hands on my hips as Josh gathered up our towels, surely avoiding the rant to come. “So you thought since you’d already saw a little bit, you might just as well keep watching?”

  I was furious. Beyond furious.

  But Allyson never was one to be put off by someone else’s anger. She stepped closer to me, looking right through me enough to make me squirm. “It’s totally not my business, but I have to ask… I saw your face, Izzy. You would have taken whatever he wanted to give you and damn the consequences, but you?” She looked to Josh, raising her eyebrows. “You stopped yourself, and then jumped overboard. Now I’m wondering why you would do that. That’s not a typical guy’s response to a willing woman, and I can’t come up with one single reason. So, either you two are faking this whole being in love thing, or he’s secretly gay and doesn’t know how to tell you,” Allyson said, putting her hands on her hips to look between the two of us.

  “Ally,” I warned, my stomach sloshing harder than the boat.

  Her eyebrow quirked. “Izzy.”

  Josh put his hand on my shoulder, moving in behind me. “I don’t mean to be rude, Allyson, but what happens or doesn’t happen between us is none of your business.”

  Her eyes widened as she said, “Oh my God. You’re a virgin.”

  She didn’t let it go at that. She gasped, clapped her hands, and then giggled. “And you’re waiting until you get married!”

  “That’s…” I struggled for words as a bubble of laughter built somewhere inside of me.

  Josh let go of my shoulder. “We don’t need to explain,” he said, the words clipped.

  “I know just how to put the both of you out of your misery. A wedding at sea! Oh, it’ll be perfect!” Allyson said, and then she grabbed me into a hug and spun me around the deck.

  “No, Ally,” I said, halting her before she got too carried away.

  She wasn’t having it. “Yes, Izzy.”

  “No.”

  She rolled her eyes and sucked her teeth at me. “Put that poor man out of his misery and marry him so he can finally get what he so desperately wants.”

  “What is it the man desperately wants?” Alex asked as he walked up, looking at the varying emotions on each of our faces.

  Allyson beamed. “Her. He really wants her, but he’s waiting until they’re married. It’s so romantic.”

  CHAPTER 13

  JOSH

  I couldn’t get the feel of Ella’s body out of my head. No matter how much I tried, or what I forced myself to think about, my thoughts always focused back in on the way I had felt pressed against her. How easy it would have been. A simple shift of clothing… no, stop it.

  Ella paced the floor. Phone in hand, she relayed the latest news to Oliver while I poured us both a very stout drink. Or what I thought was a stout drink. It couldn’t have been too bad, because Ella stopped her tirade long enough to chug half of it, and then handed the glass back to me saying, “More.”

  I set her glass down, took a sip of mine, and felt my throat tighten and my eyes burn. Ella didn’t need another drink like that one, so I dumped a can of soda in, shoved the ice around with my finger to mix it, and held it out to her.

  “Go with the flow? Have you lost your damn mind?” she demanded. “That’s the solution? Get married. Never mind the fact that I’m already married, Oliver.”

  I cringed.

  If Oliver could only see her face. See the tortured look pinching her brows. The tears she fought, clinging to her eyelashes.

  “Fine,” she snapped, pulling the phone away from her ear. She marched over and handed it to me. “He wants to talk to you.”

  Once the phone was in my hand, Ella stormed off to the bathroom and closed the door firmly behind her.

  “Hey, Oliver. What’s up?” I asked, holding back a sigh.

  “How did this happen? The two of you know how important it is to be low profile. You’re supposed to be there to do a job,” Oliver snapped.

  I gripped the phone so tight in my hand that it emitted a loud crack as I said, “Hold up. First, I know exactly what we’re here for. And second? You’re not here, so don’t start in on me about the way it should go down. I have enough shit to deal with.”

  “Look, it’s not a matter of you getting married, that’s easily dissolvable with a few pieces of paper. And no matter what Ella thinks, she’s no longer m
arried to Trent. She hasn’t been since his death certificate was filed. My concern now is the intel we just got from Baron,” Oliver explained. “I would have given the information to Ella, but in light of the circumstances, I thought it best to tell you, and you can fill her in once she’s calmed down a little bit.”

  “Before you say any more, I want to clarify something… you’re telling me to marry Ella?” I asked, wondering why I’d even bothered asking. He’d plainly said it. I just needed to hear it again.

  “I’m telling you to do whatever you need to do. Now can we focus on the important stuff?” Oliver asked, sounding more than a little annoyed.

  “I’m listening.”

  After hanging up with Oliver, I waited for Ella to come out of the bathroom. It had been almost thirty minutes, and she’d yet to open the door.

  I knocked softly, calling her name, and then waited for her to answer. When she didn’t, I let myself in and found her sitting with her arms around her knees as she stared at the opposite wall. I knelt beside her, taking up the rest of the space in the bathroom.

  Reaching out, I cupped her face. “Ella?”

  She blinked and blew out a long breath. “I’m fine,” she said, letting go of her legs and gesturing for me to move.

  I stood, putting my hands out to help her up. She looked at them for a second before taking the help I offered. Once she was on her feet, I pulled her into a hug. She struggled, but I wouldn’t let her go.

  “Don’t push me away, Ella. I know you’re hurting. I get it, but let me help you. Lean on me so we can get through this together. Talk to me. Yell at me, but don’t shut me out. I already feel alone enough as it is.”

  Her head bumped into my chest as a sob broke free from her. Her arms loosely wrapped around me, locking us together. She didn’t try to speak; she just held on and let the storm brewing inside her break free.

  I brushed her hair back from her face, and then splayed my hand across the center of her back, holding her close until her body stopped shaking and her breathing evened out to hitched sobs that soon tapered off. When she tried to push back, I hugged her one more time, kissed the top of her head, and then dropped my hands, giving her some space.

  She reached past me, pulled a long strip of toilet paper from the roll, wiped her eyes, and then blew her nose.

  “Better?” I asked.

  “No, but at least I’m not in the mood to murder anyone like I was before,” she answered, stepping to the side and looking into the mirror. “Well, don’t I look like hell? Hand me a washcloth, please,” she said, turning on the water.

  There wasn’t room to get by her so I sat on the closed toilet seat lid and waited as she applied the cold cloth to her face.

  “Does that really work?” I asked, watching her fold the cloth into a strip and then hold it against her eyes.

  “It’ll take the red away, and some of the puffiness. Time does the rest. Or cucumber slices.” She ran the washcloth under the tap again.

  “Cucumbers? I guess once you’re done wiping your face with them, you have a snack.”

  She made a face. “Gross. And you don’t wipe your face with them. You put them on your eyes,” she answered.

  “Is that one of those life-hack things?”

  She eyed me, deciding I wasn’t giving her a hard time, and said, “No. Well, maybe, I guess you could call it that. All I know is that there is something in the cucumber that soothes the skin around your eyes. Spas use them all the time.”

  “Huh, learn something new every day,” I said, watching as she rinsed the washcloth one more time and wrung it out.

  “I think I’m gonna lay down. My head is pounding.” Ella turned from the mirror. “While I do that, you can fill me in on what Oliver talked to you about.”

  The washcloth slipped down her face when she sat up. “Pirates? Like real pirates?”

  I rolled over onto my side, propping my head on my palm. “Not the swashbuckling kind they portray in the movies, though that would be cool. Jared would be jealous. Especially if they had a peg-legged bird or a monkey.”

  She shoved me, knocking my hand from under my head. I rolled over onto my back, grabbed a pillow, and then pulled it under my head as she said, “Explain.”

  I settled in as she sat up, crisscrossing her legs, one eyebrow arched while clasping her hands in her lap.

  “Oliver said that Baron received a concerning threat. One he couldn’t ignore. I guess the guy gets them regularly. But this threat came with a little more detail,” I explained.

  She leaned closer. “What sort of detail?”

  “Well, for starters, they had the name of this boat, the sailing dates, ports of call, and a crew manifest,” I answered.

  Her eyes grew distant as she processed what I said, forming a new plan in her mind. “So now we not only have to watch the guests, keep tabs on horny newlyweds, watch the crew, but now we have to keep an eye on the whole ocean surrounding us too?” She shook her head. “Jesus, we need like two more sets of eyes each.”

  “And all the while, we need to look like we only have eyes for each other,” I added, sighing. “We should have come up with a different cover story.”

  She fell over on her side, dropped the washcloth back on her face, and groaned, adding, “I completely agree.”

  “I’m thinking tomorrow we need to check out some stores and see if we can find a few things,” I said, getting an idea.

  “Like what sort of things?” she asked, throwing the washcloth. It sailed across the room and landed somewhere inside the bathroom.

  “Nice throw,” I said.

  She tucked her hands under her face. “Probably landed in the toilet.”

  “Toilet lid is closed.”

  “What sort of things do you want to buy?”

  I liked how Ella could bounce around in conversations with me without either of us getting lost.

  “Cameras and such. Something easily hidden that doesn’t need to be mounted. Stuff with apps so we can see it on the phone. And I’d feel a little better if we had more than just one pistol,” I added, flicking a glance at the closet where it was tucked away. The last thing either of us needed was the maid coming in and finding a loaded weapon. And keeping it on us while wandering around in bathing suits wasn’t an option.

  “We could always go with diving knives. Then having a weapon wouldn’t look so… out of place,” Ella added, chewing on her lip in thought.

  “Good idea. Tomorrow we’ll get everything we need. I don’t think we’ll have to worry so much about actual pirates, though. The way Oliver talked, it seemed like a scare tactic. But the crew manifest and the sailing itinerary… that’s a little more accurate detailing. Though I do wonder… what if it was a passenger who passed the information on?”

  “That’s a good possibility. We should probably start making a list of people who don’t sit right with us. Gut instinct seems to have worked well in the past. And we have absolutely nothing to go on, so it’s a start.”

  “Yeah, like the guy who was looking for Alex. His cousin, wasn’t it? Summer didn’t seem to care all that much for him,” I said, remembering our first encounter with Nick.

  “And I want to pick Allyson’s brain a little more. There seems to be a whole lot more going on than what she’s saying. Maybe if I can get her alone, she’ll open up and talk to me,” Ella said.

  I fought a yawn. “Sounds like you two should have a girl’s day.”

  Ella yanked the covers back, and then slipped in between them. “I doubt I could keep her from Alex that long, but she might be okay with a few hours.”

  She was still in the same sundress she’d changed into once we’d returned to our room, and when I pointed that out, she just snuggled further under the covers and said, “I know, but I’m too freaking tired to be bothered.”

  CHAPTER 14

  ELLA

  We’d just sat down for breakfast when Summer swept in and pulled out the empty chair opposite of me, plunking down in it. She wo
re a smile that stretched from ear to ear as she waved her fingers to get the attention of a server.

  “What?” I questioned, knowing what was coming.

  “Are you two really going to get married at sea?” she asked, eyes bouncing between Josh and me.

  “We haven’t—”

  “That’s the plan,” Josh said, interrupting me as he reached under the table and squeezed my leg gently. “But we really don’t know where to start.”

  Summer watched me for a second and then said, “You don’t look all that happy about it, Ella, and your eyes are puffy. Have you been crying?”

  How the hell could she be so intuitive? “I…”

  Josh cleared his throat. “Maybe Summer and Allyson will help you with the planning? Then at least you won’t feel so overwhelmed. You don’t want your head to start hurting again.”

  I pinched his leg hard enough to make him wince. He grabbed my hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing the spot just over my ring.

  “Ah, I understand now. Wedding jitters,” Summer said, winking. “Of course we’ll help. That’s what friends are for. What are your plans today?”

  “We were going to go check out some of the shops,” I said, pushing my half-eaten breakfast away, cursing the interfering Baron sisters for my lack of appetite.

  From the corner of my eye, Josh ate, eyes roaming in between bites like we’d discussed before we’d left our room. The plan was to people watch and make mental note of anything odd. People had tells, all different, but if I watched long enough, I would start to see a pattern. If someone was plotting, or had a plan in motion, they’d want to know where the newlyweds were at all times. And since the newlyweds didn’t have any sort of set plans, everything could shift to play out as needed.

  There were too many variables though. Any one of the people sailing with us could be the one threatening Garett Baron. Finding out who it was would be like searching for the proverbial needle in a haystack, but only if they made their move. Until then, we were forced to wait it out and keep extra vigilance wherever we were.