Under the Harvest Moon: Book Seven

by Samantha Jillian Bayarr

  Dear Gott, please spare the boppli from whatever pain he’s in. Bring the doctor swiftly, and bless him with the ability to assess Adam’s condition. Heal that innocent boppli, and don’t take him away from his mamm and daed.

  Lila tried to keep her mind off the cries that did not subside from the upstairs room. She tried not to think about what could happen, but she knew it was another reason she did not want to bring a boppli into the world. Too many things could go wrong that could take a mamm away from a boppli, or the other way around. Panic raced through her at the thought of Bess losing her boppli.

  Tears fell unchecked from Lila’s chin dropping into the dishwater. She mindlessly washed the dishes until Samuel threw open the kitchen door. Startled, Lila pulled her apron to her face and wiped away evidence of her distress over the situation. It was too late. Doctor Davis followed the sound of Adam’s screams while Samuel approached Lila, laying a comforting hand on her shoulder.

  “He’s going to be fine,” Samuel said, his smooth baritone voice sending shivers through her.

  His nearness paralyzed, her and his scent charmed her into submission. She felt a strong pull toward him, feeling like she couldn’t resist him if he were to pull her into his strong arms and hold her captive against the strong plane of his chest. Could it really be that simple to let him comfort her?

  Gott, give me the strength to resist this mann.

  It was no use; she allowed herself to drift toward him as he encompassed her in the safety of his embrace.

  Chapter 11

  Lila flinched away from Samuel. She had to be stronger than the pull she felt from this mann. It would take extreme measures to guard her heart from him, but she would not let him pull her into a dream that could never be hers. How could she have given in to such a moment of weakness? She didn’t want him to think she was interested in him. The feel of his embrace haunted her, enticing her to allow more of the same.

  “You don’t always have to be so strong and independent,” Samuel said.

  It would be too easy for her drift back into his arms, but she’d made a choice for her life, and she had no intention of changing her mind.

  “Maybe I do.”

  Lila suddenly realized the boppli had stopped crying. Alarm caught in her throat where it nearly choked her with emotion. Samuel drew her back to him, and she didn’t resist the peaceful retreat his strong arms offered. She breathed him in, wishing she could shut out the world and all the hurt that came with it. Blinking away fresh tears, Lila felt safe in the clutches of Samuel’s arms. She reasoned with herself that she would bask in the safety of his affections, but she would not allow herself to lose herself in him.

  An upstairs door opened and Lila pulled away at the sound of footfalls padding down the steps. She couldn’t read the doctor’s face to discover the outcome of the visit with Bess’s boppli.

  Gott, please let him be alright.

  Doctor Davis sighed. “Just a bad case of colic.” He sniffed toward the food warming on the stove. “Do you have enough to spare this old man some supper? I’m afraid by the time I reach home the missus will have already eaten.”

  Lila snapped into action. “Jah. Sit. I’ll make you a plate.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, Lila could see Samuel sit down across from the doctor at the table in the kitchen. Now she would have to serve him as well. Otherwise the doctor might find her impertinent. She readied two plates and served the menner who sat making small-talk about the weather.

  “Thank you, dear child,” Doctor Davis said with a worn smile on his aging face. “Won’t you sit down and join us?”

  Samuel nodded, his dimples showing as he winked at her.

  Lila’s heart thumped an extra beat. “Nee, I should wait for Onkel and Bess.”

  The doctor put his fork down and wiped his mouth. “You might want to eat without them. That baby wore them out. They thought it was best if they rested now that he’s settled down. I don’t think they’ll be joining us anytime soon.”

  Samuel jutted his chin out toward the food on the stove. “Get a plate and join us.”

  “Might as well eat it while it’s hot,” the doctor said. “You should be the one enjoying your cooking. It’s very good. You’ll make some young man a good wife with cooking this good.”

  The doctor’s comment struck a nerve, and it didn’t help that Samuel smiled at her as if to say he’d like to have her as his fraa.

  “Will you excuse me, please?”

  Lila dashed to the back door, grabbed her cloak off the peg on the wall, and shouldered her way out into the cold night. She padded across the back yard to the dock and didn’t stop until she reached the end. Her breath created steam that showed bright against the moonlight. It was cold, and her teeth chattered, but she didn’t care. Anything was better than being paired off like cattle. Lila didn’t like being teased, especially about something she was so much against. Did everyone really expect her to get married? Why did it seem that was her only choice?

  In the crisp, stillness of the night, Lila could hear the back door to the B&B open. She hoped it was only the doctor leaving to go back home, but she knew the old mann would stay until he finished his meal. That only left one other person that would walk out that door; Samuel.

  Lila turned around to face him as he sauntered up the dock toward her. His chiseled features were illuminated in the moonlight, the depth of his dimples looking like the dark side of the moon. He was too handsome to resist, and his confidence made him even more appealing. How was she to resist Samuel if he was always around? It almost seemed that everyone expected them to pair up, and she would have no say in the matter. It wasn’t fair that as an Amish woman, it was assumed she would marry and have lots of kinner. What about what she wanted? Didn’t that matter?

  Samuel closed the space between them and placed his wool coat around her shoulders. The sweet memory of his arms around her when they were in the kitchen taunted her. Was there somewhere deep in her subconscious that wanted what he offered? She had enjoyed the closeness between them so much it frightened her. She had a plan for her life, and now she felt confused all because of one embrace. An embrace that left her wanting something she thought she would never want.

  Why did he have to be so wonderful and irresistible? Why couldn’t he be more like Henry Hochstetler from back home? Then she could just be content with being his friend. It was because Samuel was nothing like Henry. Samuel was handsome and kind the same as Henry, but Samuel was just a little bit too confident. That smooth confidence both scared and angered her.

  “I don’t want to marry you,” Lila blurted out.

  Samuel smirked at her. “I don’t remember asking you!”

  Chapter 12

  Lila glared at Samuel, but he could see in her eyes that she was upset by his comment.

  “So you don’t want to marry me?” she asked through pursed lips.

  Samuel found it hard to keep from laughing. Lila was on his hook, and she didn’t even realize it. How long would he keep her dangling there before cutting her loose or reeling her in?

  “I didn’t say I didn’t want to marry you, but I didn’t ask you, either.”

  He smiled so brightly, the moon was pale in comparison. Lila turned her gaze toward the pond to keep from falling prey to the lure of his charming arrogance.

  “Did you want me to ask you?” Samuel quipped.

  Lila hesitated.

  What was she waiting for? The anticipation rolling through Samuel’s veins was enough to set his nerves ablaze. Did she want to marry him? He knew he already liked her, but was he ready to ask her to marry him?

  Pursing her lips, Lila jutted her chin out. What was wrong with her? She knew the answer to that question just as sure as she knew her own name. But for the first time, she was unsure of the decision she’d made so long ago. Now that the question was actually being posed, she didn’t have the heart to turn Samuel away. What was happening to her?

  “I don’t want you to ask me,�
�� she said soberly.

  Lila slipped out of the warmth of Samuel’s coat and handed it to him. She tried to walk past him, but he stopped her and pulled her into his arms. Caught off guard, Lila didn’t fight him when he lowered his lips to hers. His warm breath quieted the echoes of reason her mind stirred to the surface.

  Heat radiated off Samuel, scorching her with desire for him. Lila deepened the kiss like a woman who was ready to commit her heart and soul to him. But was she really prepared to marry him simply because of his magnetic pull on her heart? Lila was falling for him, no doubt, but her mind told her to back away before it was too late—if it wasn’t already.

  Samuel curled his fingers around the nape of Lila’s neck, drawing her closer still. He couldn’t help himself. He wanted to drink her in like she was the last drop of water in an acrid desert. His heart was already bestowed to her whether she was ready for it or not. Her mouth had said she didn’t want him, but her lips against his told him she did.

  “Marry me,” he whispered at her temple.

  “I can’t,” she whispered as her lips dragged across his rugged cheek until they met his once more.

  Samuel cupped her cheeks in his hands and deepened the kiss. He would either wear her down with his fervent kisses, or he would enjoy it as long as she would allow it. Either way, he wasn’t willing to let her go without giving it everything he had. Something about her made him want her for his fraa when he’d never even given marriage a single thought before.

  “Marry me, Lila” he whispered again.

  Lila’s heart did a flip flop in her chest. Why did Samuel have to be so handsome and such a gut kisser? If he wasn’t so wonderful, she would have no trouble resisting him at all, but she had to do it. Her fear of the future wouldn’t let go of the stronghold it had on her.

  Lila broke away from Samuel and gazed into his eyes that reflected the harvest moon. How could she say no to him? She wanted to kiss him for the rest of her life, but she didn’t want to make bopplies with him—or with any mann. He would expect to have kinner, and she wouldn’t give them to him. It would break his heart more than if she let him go now while his feelings for her were still so new.

  “I can’t marry you, Samuel.” She nearly choked on the words.

  Lila watched Samuel’s expression twist with sorrow, his eyes glazed over with emotion. Her stomach clenched with immediate regret.

  “Why did you kiss me like that, then?”

  “I could kiss you for the rest of my life, but that doesn’t mean I can marry you.”

  Tension claimed Samuel’s jaw. “Did I do something wrong? Was this too fast for you?”

  “You did nothing wrong. I enjoyed kissing you, but you could wait a year and it wouldn’t matter. I don’t want to get married.”

  Samuel tried to pull her back into his arms, but the spell between them had broken. “I’ll wait however long I have to.”

  Lila’s eyes filled with tears. “Don’t wait. It wouldn’t be fair to you because I will never say yes.”

  He nodded grimly.

  Lila knew she’d hurt him, but it was better to do it now than to wait until he’d vested too much of his heart. The cold no longer affected her, for her emotions numbed her from the inside out. She hated to leave him, but she knew that if she didn’t leave now she never would. Staying would only hurt him more in the end.

  Samuel let go of Lila. It was no use trying to keep her close to him if she didn’t want to be there. She glanced at him once more before walking away slowly. He could see she hadn’t wanted to leave any more than he wanted her to go. Was this the part where he was supposed to go after her? He couldn’t help but hope it was worth a try.

  Sprinting across the wet grass, Samuel captured her up into his arms, catching her off guard. He pressed his lips to hers again, hoping she wouldn’t resist him.

  She didn’t.

  Pausing between kisses, he gazed into her fiery green eyes. “Don’t marry me.”

  “What are you talking about?” she asked.

  His look turned serious. “Don’t marry me, then. Just kiss me every day for the rest of your life.”

  Chapter 13

  “Nee, Katie, please wait until the doctor gets here!”

  “I trust you,” Katie said breathlessly. “You did a gut job of helping Bess to birth Adam.”

  Katie let out a scream from the pain. She pulled on the sleeve of Rachel’s dress. “Please don’t leave me. I’m scared. What if Caleb doesn’t make it here on time?”

  I’ve got to stop visiting pregnant women!

  Rachel was trying not to show concern, not wanting to alert her bruder’s fraa. “Let’s concentrate of getting you comfortable first. Then we will worry about Caleb. The important thing is help you relax so that maybe you can keep from pushing until the doctor gets here.”

  Rachel had no idea why she was so nervous. She’d just been through this with Bess. But that day she’d had no time to think about it. Now that she’d had time to think about it, she didn’t want to be in this situation again—especially not with her bruder’s boppli.

  “I called the doc from the barn, and he should be here soon. Please try to wait until he gets here.”

  Katie was not listening. Rachel could see that the woman was already bearing down. She let out another scream. Bess had not made this much fuss, and Rachel feared something could be wrong.

  Mopping up sweat from Katie’s hair, Rachel soothed her through a difficult, long contraction.

  “It’s getting worse,” Katie cried. “I have to get up. I can’t lie in this bed anymore. It hurts my back too much.”

  Rachel assisted Katie out of the bed and helped her lean over the mattress. She rubbed her lower back during the next contraction, and that seemed to ease the pains. Rachel hoped that meant it was Katie’s position on the bed that had made her so uncomfortable.

  Grabbing a pillow and hugging it to her chest, Katie leaned into the mattress during the next contraction. They were coming faster and lasting longer, and Rachel knew that meant it wouldn’t be long before she was ready.

  With a sudden gush, Katie’s water broke, causing her to let out a scream with the pain of the contraction. Rachel grabbed a few towels she’d brought into the room with her and placed them around Katie’s feet.

  “I think I better get back in bed now,” Katie said breathlessly.

  Rachel agreed, helping her. She placed a clean towel beneath her and propped the pillows up behind her head just in time for the next contraction.

  “I think you better catch mei boppli, Rachel.”

  A quick glance out the bedroom window showed no sign of the doctor or her bruder, so Rachel braced herself to catch Katie’s boppli. One more contraction later the boppli was crowing.

  “Push slowly, Katie, on the next contraction,” Rachel urged her.

  “I’ll try,” Katie squeezed out before pushing.

  “It’s a boy!” Rachel said around the lump in her throat.

  Katie’s eyes welled up with emotion as she reached for her new boppli. “Your daed will be so happy to see you,” she cooed to him.

  Rachel brought the quilt across Katie’s lap to wait for the doctor to finish. “Where can I find a pair of scissors to cut the cord?”

  Katie pointed to a sewing box in the corner of the room, her eyes not leaving her new son.

  Rachel worked fast to tie and cut the cord.

  “He’s beautiful.”

  Katie looked up for only a moment. “Danki. For being here and helping me. I could not have done this without your help.”

  Rachel placed a warm hand on Katie’s shoulder as she gazed upon the new life she’d helped bring into her bruder’s familye.

  “Do you have a quilt made for him?”

  “Jah, it’s in the cedar chest at the end of the bed.” Katie pointed to a hand-carved piece of furniture she could see had been made by her bruder.

  She lifted the lid and retrieved a small blue and yellow quilt and brought it to Katie so
she could wrap her new boppli in it. Hearing faint buggy wheels, Rachel was relieved when she peered out the window at Caleb’s buggy coming up the lane followed by Doctor Davis.

  Rachel busied herself mopping up the floor, tossing the wet towels over the edge of the bathtub in the bathroom down the hall. When she returned to the room, Caleb was taking the stairs two at a time to get to Katie.

  Joy filled his face as Caleb rushed to Katie’s side. “Why didn’t you wait for me?”

  “Your son had other plans for his day,” Katie said proudly.

  Caleb’s face lit with emotion. “It’s a buwe?”

  “Jah, and your schweschder helped deliver him.”

  Caleb looked at Rachel, who readied a pan of water and linens on the bureau across the room. His thank you showed in his misty expression without even saying a word to her. She smiled at her older bruder, feeling equally happy.

  Doctor Davis entered the room and looked directly at Rachel. “Did you deliver this one, too?”

  Rachel beamed. “Jah, but I didn’t do it on purpose any more than I did with Bess.”

  “I’m glad you were here,” Caleb said.

  “I am too,” Katie said, not looking up from her son.

  “That makes three of us,” Doctor Davis agreed.

  Rachel offered a silent prayer for the miraculous outcome for the second time in the span of a week. If this kept up, she’d be known as the midwife of the community, and she wasn’t certain she wanted the women in the community to start asking for her when they were birthing. She was more than happy to leave that task to the doctor. He was older and had more experience. Rachel only wanted to concentrate on her wedding for now.

  Doctor Davis busied himself with examining the new boppli.

  “He’s healthy and strong, Caleb. Have you picked out a name?”

  A few whispers later, and Caleb announced his new son, Isaac.