Bitter Moon

by R. L. Giddings

  “And what are you going to do?”

  Kinsella narrowed his eyes. “He summoned this thing. It’s up to me to try and send it back.”

  With that he raised a hand towards the altar. Every second that passed the demon was becoming more real. It seemed to sense something and turned, as if recognising a familiar scent.

  When it spoke, its voice was high and mellifluous. “By all the hours of the day and night I did not think to see you again so soon.”

  Kinsella’s eyes had shrunk deep into his head but his voice was level. “Don’t think that what has passed between us gives you any sovereignty over me, demon.”

  “Your words sound so confident and yet you have no faith in them. Is it because of what happened to your friend? Or is it because you fear me?” The malice in the demon’s words reverberated around the room and I saw, for the first time, how frail Kinsella had become.

  “I command you, o demon dwelling in these parts, by whatever power you have been given by the infernal principality of the abyss, whether dwelling in the East, West, South or North or in any side of the earth…”

  Tuchulcha squirmed as if attempting to hold itself together, to fight - as it had always done -to gain the upper hand. And yet it was obvious that Kinsella’s words were having an effect, as though every syllable was tugging at old scars, rending its flesh, opening long forgotten wounds.

  “I command that you do hereby abdicate all power to guard, habit and abide here; by whom further I constrain and command you.”

  With Kinsella in full flow, I went over and put my arm around Kosi. She smelled of starch and dried flowers and was gripping the amulet in both hands. Her eyes were fixed on Kohl, almost challenging him to react, but he did nothing. Kinsella’s re-appearance had clearly unsettled him.

  I rubbed my chest where Kohl had struck me earlier.

  “I will have that amulet, Bronte.”

  But there was something different about his voice now. What was it? Annoyance or desperation. It was hard to tell.

  Kinsella’s words, elegantly and precisely spoken, echoed in the background, “Tuchulcha, without guile or deception I charge you to declare your names, and to leave me in peaceable possession of this place.”

  But how much longer was this going to take?

  I looked over to him for some kind of indication but I was to be disappointed. Swaying slightly, Kinsella wore a fierce expression but his eyes didn’t seem to be registering anything that was going on around him. Perhaps he was picturing a Scottish hillside, seeing his friend walking towards that self-same demon, clutching a broken shoelace.

  As if sensing my thoughts, Tuchulcha shifted its gaze in my direction, its cavernous mouth large enough to swallow me whole. There was no humanity there, nothing but cold, calculating malice. There could be no reasoning with a thing like that, just acquiescence and blind devotion.

  Everything started to assume the semblance of a nightmare. I turned back towards Kohl, tucking Kosi in behind me.

  Kohl indicated the women standing around the walls. “It’s too late for them: a debt has to be paid. But if you’ll take back the amulet, I’ll let you walk free.”

  “That’s very good of you,” I said, sounding more confident than I felt. “But when I leave this place I’m taking all of them with me.”

  Kohl challenged me with his eyes. “Good luck with that.”

  *

  I had barely enough time to arrange my stance before Kohl’s assault began. Lightning arced across the room, so brightly that its forks burnt themselves onto my retina. It was a crushingly effective weapon, particularly when you weren’t expecting it, but I had learnt from the bitter experience of others.

  Valeria and Millie had both faced him in the past.

  That didn’t mean that I was fully prepared for what came next; no one could have been. But I’d had several days to think up a suitable defence against Kohl’s weapon of choice. The other women would have had no warning whatsoever.

  I drew on the moisture in the room to create a column of super cooled air that would channel any electricity away from me. I cowered behind it, unsure of whether it would even work. But it did. Sheets of lightning danced in front of me, ridiculously close. I’d only ever experienced something like that once before, in training, and, although terrifying, that had been over in a matter of seconds. This was on another level entirely.

  It must have made vast in-roads into Kohl’s resources: consuming huge amounts of magical energy like that, but it didn’t dissuade him. The pillar of defensive magic, which I was crouching behind, appeared to be holding but it was the heat that surprised me. My arms were becoming uncomfortably hot and I could smell my hair starting to crisp. And yet, that wasn’t the worst part. With all his efforts, Kohl was effectively burning all the oxygen around me so that it was becoming a conscious effort just to breath. If he kept it up for much longer Kosi and I were both going to suffocate.

  But then, as soon as it had begun, it was over. Finding nothing more to push against, I pitched forward onto my knees. Kosi, who had been holding me round the waist went over with me. We were both dripping with sweat and I could feel Kosi’s heart racing. I wasn’t sure how much more of this I could take. However much the attack had weakened Kohl it had all but exhausted me. My arms were shaking so badly I could hardly bear my own weight.

  Kohl just stood there, his hands clenching and unclenching, his tongue sweeping restlessly across his gums. He’d tried to kill me and he’d failed. It was clearly disconcerting for him. He was becoming more and more desperate and desperate men do desperate things.

  There was no way that I could defeat him, that much was obvious. But if I could frustrate him - delay him long enough for Kinsella to finish his job - then there was still some slim chance that we might be able to save Kosi.

  I felt dizzy and slightly sick and hardly had enough energy to get back to my feet. Kosi helped me to stand.

  Kohl watched all this as he pushed a strand of hair back off his face. I remember thinking then that he had cruel eyes but a beautiful mouth. I remember that particularly because, at the time, I wondered if his face would be the last thing I’d ever see.

  I said, “We could fight him, you know. Tuchulcha. We could fight him together, the three of us.”

  He laughed at that, then lowered his chin to his chest. “I’ve tried that. Doesn’t work.”

  Kohl was fast. His hand came up while I was trying to work out what my feet were doing.

  It was like being kicked in the chest by a mule and was aimed at exactly the same place he’d targeted earlier. I felt something crack in my breast bone as I was hurled back across the room. I lay there looking up at the mosaic panels on the ceiling. Kosi ran over, her eyes pleading with me to get up. But I couldn’t. I had nothing left.

  Then someone stood over me and offered me their hand. The face –though inverted - was one I thought I recognised.

  It was Carlotta, looking extremely chaste in her nun’s habit.

  I allowed myself to be hoisted to my feet. Her palm was damp and sweaty.

  “You can do this, Bronte.”

  “I don’t think so.”

  “You have to,” she gestured towards Kosi who was cowering at my back.

  Paula appeared then and clapped me on the shoulder. She gave me a tight smile.

  “Me and the girls appreciate you coming back for us like this. We haven’t got much to offer you but you’re welcome to what we have.”

  I stared at her, uncomprehending.

  “We thought you were a Spoiler at first that’s why we kept our distance. We knew you had it in you. But then we saw what you did to those two demons. No Spoiler could cast spells like that.”

  “You thought I was a Spoiler?”

  “You can draw energy from others. It’s obvious. Only other person who could do that was that bitch Anathema.”

  My mind went back to my time with her on the roof. How she’d warmed my hands.

  In the same way that
I can draw power from another witch, then so can you.

  I hadn’t understood it at the time. Not fully. Now I wondered how such an obvious truth could have eluded me for so long.

  Carlotta squeezed my hand. “You know you can do it.”

  I looked from one to the other. Their faces expectant. I didn’t know what I’d done to inspire such confidence but I suspected that it was misplaced. I was about to get everyone killed.

  “You might want to step away now,” I said.

  Carlotta nodded and stepped back but was immediately replaced by Nastya. She seemed to have regained her senses and grasped my hand tightly. Paula clapped me on the shoulder and then held on.

  I wasn’t sure what they thought this was going to achieve. We were no match for Kohl.

  I drew a deep breath. Prepared myself. One more attack from Kohl would probably do it.

  The other Novices were gathering now, their faces ashen. Bearing witness.

  “This is his gift to me,” Kohl declared, sullenly. “The ability to destroy beautiful things. It’s sad, but there you are. It’s all I have.”

  When the lightning came it was almost a relief. I hadn’t the energy to block it properly, having all but exhausted the available moisture in the room. So I just held up my hand, expecting the worst. When the fork hit my palm I was surprised when it didn’t kill me outright. It was cruel in a way. It allowed me to hope.

  The heat in my hand began to build and I had to pour all my efforts into just keeping my skin from melting.

  This is what happened to Valeria.

  I pictured the blackened ruin of her hand.

  Felt the crescents of my teeth grinding together in grim determination

  I was holding on. I felt a fresh surge of energy coming from Paula and Nastyia convincing me that I was still alive. It was an odd sensation, like blood flowing back into a limb that had been constricted.

  What’s happening? I thought. What is this?

  Even though I still had to look away from the enormous energies ebbing and flowing between us I was aware that I wasn’t being overwhelmed.

  No. A fever was upon me and I was burning up.

  The heat in my hand had, by now, reached impossible levels. I could feel the individual digits fusing together.

  I gritted my teeth harder and tried not to think about the damage I was doing to myself. So far, there was no pain – that would come later. When I chanced a glance at my hand I could see that my fingers had become transparent, the bones themselves reduced to vague smudges.

  I just had to hold on for a few more seconds.

  But the image of Valeria’s blackened stump just wouldn’t go away.

  For a second, the advantage shifted away from me and I felt myself pinned beneath an enormous weight, as if the whole building had turned on its apex, intent on crushing me. Greyness threatened my sight. I was in danger of blacking out.

  Kohl spoke through gritted teeth.

  “Bow down before your master.”

  “Never!”

  As I said it, I heard the word echo around the room as the Novices repeated it over and over.

  “Never!” “Never!” “Never!”

  The surge of emotion this unleashed roared into my body from both sides. It was like two rivers converging and with me at its centre.

  “Never!” I roared, channelling the women’s resentment, their feelings of repression built up over weeks, months, years.

  “Never.”

  When I gave vent the next time, when I finally pushed back, I found myself to be in the ascendancy. It was as if I’d breached the wall of a dam. The force came rushing out.

  For a moment Kohl was able to resist but then something ruptured, I heard him cry out and he was gone.

  It was only when the lightning abated that the true pain came. I clutched at my wrist. Temporarily deafened and blinded, I staggered away. The pain flared in my fingers like old, dry fire moving up into my wrist, then up into my forearm, slowly cooking the flesh as it went. My fingers were gone, melted away, dripped onto the floor in a puddle of grease.

  Warm breath in my ear.

  A woman’s voice. Paula’s voice.

  “Stay strong, girl. We’re all with you on this.”

  The hairs on my neck bristled with raw energy. Everything seemed so dingy after the shock of what had gone before but slowly my eyes adjusted and I began to make sense of what I was seeing.

  I found myself at the centre of a dogged human chain with Novices linked to left and right. And even now that the storm had passed they still hung on to one another, afraid to surrender that incredible sense of connection.

  Kohl was down on his knees, a poor copy of his former self and, for a moment, I saw him for what he was: a nineteen year-old boy caught out in a storm.

  His Adam’s apple worked up and down as he struggled to speak, “So, you’re still here.”

  “What’s left of me.”

  He swayed forward clutching the blackened remains of his hand. Tried to stand. Couldn’t.

  Did I do that?

  I raised my own hand, preparing myself for the inevitable.

  My hand was whole. Gloriously pink and totally reinvigorated. I flexed my fingers, studying each one in disbelief. I marvelled at how perfect it was: the sheen of my nails, the pulse at my wrist.

  Kosi was standing some distance away, the amulet stark black against the white of her habit. I went over and wrapped my arms around her. Still whole and unchanged by all this madness.

  I looked at the faces of the women. All fixed on Kohl. All solemn. Uneasy with this sudden impasse.

  In the background Kinsella’s voice rose in pitch as the words of the incantation spilled out of him. The same phrases repeated over and over, developing their own undeniable rhythm. Their own vital beat. And I was filled with that beat. Its urgency. The whole chapel resounded with it: ancient, strong, biblical.

  “Behold your sentence! Behold that which forbids rebellion and binds you to one place.”

  Kohl fixed on me, his face full of intent. With a final effort he raised his blackened hand and held it out in my direction. I could see the effort on his face as he struggled to bend his fingers into the requisite shapes he had practised so many times. Only this time, they defied him.

  Kinsella was racing towards the final part of his incantation.

  “Enough!” the demon screamed, but it was a scream of agony. Tuchulcha lurched sideways, making as if to topple over but, instead, bringing one of its long pallid arms around, catching Kohl hard in the small of the back. He stiffened as he was lifted clear of the ground.

  Various claws appeared, pinioning Kohl’s arms in place. His eyes never left me, his mouth lengthening into a scream which never came.

  Kinsella stepped forward, fixing both of them in his sights.

  “Behold your sentence! Behold that which forbids rebellion to our wills. I abjure and constrain thee by His Holy Name, by him who stood upon the asp, who crushed the lion and the dragon. Do thou obey me, and fulfil my command, being powerless to do harm unto me or any person here present, either in body or soul. Douse your earthly flame and leave this realm of men. I command thee: depart!”

  For a short while, nothing happened and we stood, regarding one another in silence. It took a moment before any of us realised the subtle change in the room. It started with a steady thrumming sound.

  “What’s that noise?” one of the women said.

  Then my gaze shifted up, to the pall of smoke which hung over the demon’s head.

  It had become suddenly hot and humid inside the little chapel. I felt something brush against my face and swatted at it with an open hand. Others in the room were doing the same thing. Over to my left, a black cloud billowed across the floor before settling on one of the fallen wall hangings.

  Kosi tugged at my arm but I ignored her. The buzzing was getting louder. One of the candles from the ceremony caught my eye and I found it bristling with gleaming insects.

  “Bront
e, look.”

  Kosi was standing with her arms out-stretched, her face tight and pinched. Both her arms were draped in seething black sleeves. When she banged them together the insects switched, en-masse, to cover her face and shoulders. I tried to help her, tried to brush them away but there were just too many of them. As quickly as I wiped one area clean then it was teeming again.

  All around us, the Novices were running about, shaking themselves like dogs in an effort to rid themselves of the bristling throng but Kosi, perhaps because of her white votress’s habit, was the worst affected of all. She was simply awash with glistening bodies.

  A cloud of insects hung around my head. I wondered if this was what it was like to wear a veil. They swarmed everywhere, great smoking swathes of them swirling around the confines of the little chapel. Several flew into my mouth and, appalled, I instantly spat them out again.

  But Kosi was in a much worse state than me. She beat at her face, her chest, her arms, her waist, her back. At one point, her extremities looked to be dripping in coffee grounds. She was quickly becoming distressed and I pulled her to me in an attempt to help. Insects were crawling over her scalp, clinging to her eyelashes, pervading her nostrils. I pulled her face against my chest, wiping it backwards and forwards, crushing countless numbers as I did so.

  I chanced to look up for a second in the hope of securing a hiding place where we might get some respite. The air was thick with insects flying this way and that. But what I saw caused the strength to drain from my legs.

  A living, shifting shadow rose above the altar.

  If you looked hard enough you could still make out the shapes of Kohl and the demon in the midst of their glistening torment. The insects poured over them in a dark river, in places, obscuring them completely. Kohl’s face was gone, the insects filling his mouth so he couldn’t even scream. He fought to free himself, scooping bodies up in great handfuls but no sooner did he get rid of those than a frenzied black cloud covered him again.

  I marvelled that he fought against it for so long. How could he even draw breath under that onslaught? The weight of bodies alone must have been unbearable.