She faced her computer screen, and couldn’t comprehend a single word on the screen. Jesus Christ, she wasn’t going to be able to concentrate today.
And when Nick came back a week later, it only got worse.
Fortunately, their departments didn’t often interact. Nick was part of the marketing department and Deanna worked in IT. As long as his computer didn’t crap out on him this week—oh please, God, don’t—they’d have no reason to be in the same room unless they wanted to be.
And in spite of how much she tried to avoid him, she wanted to see him. Desperately. They needed to talk, and no matter how much she told herself differently, she needed to be around him. Near him. He was so far off limits it wasn’t even funny, but the only time she was more off-kilter than she was around him was when she wasn’t around him.
She certainly had plenty of opportunities, that was for sure. Before today, she’d never realized how much they passed each other in the halls during working hours. Nick was constantly going back and forth to meetings, offices, and conference rooms. Deanna had her fair share of meetings, plus she was forever on her way to fix someone’s computer or get a printer back online.
And every time—every damned time—she saw him, she could barely breathe. His presence made the guilt burn hotter, but it did something else to her blood pressure. Something she didn’t want to admit but couldn’t ignore.
She’d seen him in a different light on that beach, and it was impossible not to look at him the same way under the office fluorescents. It was impossible not to hear Jennifer’s voice in the back of her mind, telling her what they’d done had been inevitable. That there was something between them that Deanna hadn’t seen—though everyone else apparently saw it—until that night on the beach. She wanted to see it again. She didn’t want to see him again. She wanted to be as close to him as she could get. She couldn’t get far enough away. The man was going to drive her insane just by being in this building, simultaneously too close and not close enough.
And on her way back from fixing the VP’s computer, she couldn’t avoid him. He was on his way down the same hallway, walking straight toward her, and there was nowhere to turn, nowhere to go. Except maybe that conference room. She could grab him, drag him in there—
Stop it, Deanna. Stop it now.
She tried to avoid his eyes as they passed each other, and she succeeded, but she didn’t see his hand coming until it had already gently grasped her arm.
She halted in her tracks and looked him in the eye. “What—”
“Can we talk?” he asked softly.
Deanna chewed her lip. “I don’t think we should.” I don’t think I should be alone with you.
“I think we need to.”
Oh, we do. We definitely do. But here?
Was there a safer place? A place they were less likely to exercise some restraint and discretion? Work was probably the best place for them to do this without digging themselves deeper into this mess.
“I…” She exhaled. “I have a meeting with the IT group at four thirty. I can swing by your office afterward if you want to stick around for a while.”
He nodded. “I’ll be there.”
Nick released her arm, and they both kept walking in their respective directions.
And Deanna’s heart had never pounded quite so hard.
Eight
From the moment he’d walked through the door that morning, Nick had wanted nothing more than to hole up in his office and hide from the world. He didn’t have to ask if word had gotten around, though he was a wee bit curious just what Deanna had said.
“Welcome back, Nick,” the receptionist had said, offering a tightlipped smile.
The girls in accounting casually kept their backs to him as he walked through their department. Customer service was a minefield of icy looks. Carla, a co-worker he interacted with on almost an hourly basis, glared at him over her coffee cup before stalking off to her office.
Welcome back, indeed.
And now he waited for Deanna so they could—maybe—settle a few things before he went out of his damned mind.
He glanced at his computer monitor to check the time. It was just about five o’clock, so her meeting would be over any time. Any minute, she’d come walking through that door.
Assuming of course she didn’t bail and run like hell. He was tempted himself; awkward conversations were his Achilles heel. His aversion to them was part of why he was in this mess to begin with, so he didn’t have much choice but to face the music or make things worse.
He couldn’t sit still. It was close enough to five, he could safely quit working without taxing his conscience any further. No point in chaining himself to his computer, then. He pushed the chair back, got up, and went around to the front of his desk so he could
pace away some of this nervous energy.
He’d very nearly come back to work last week. Wednesday, he’d considered it. Thursday, he’d been dressed and had his briefcase in hand before he’d decided to take another day. Friday, he didn’t even bother.
He’d been going stir crazy at Carlos’s place in between quick, surreptitious trips to the house to get more of his things. Work would have been a welcome distraction, a welcome return to his normal life, but he couldn’t bring himself to walk into this building and face Deanna until today.
No more putting it off. They had to. Now. Especially after he’d almost tripped over his own feet every time they’d crossed paths today. How had he never noticed how gorgeous she was?
Five days a week for the last several years, he’d seen her just like he had all day today: slacks and a blouse, neat and put together from her hair to her clothes. She was attractive, of course. He’d had his moments thinking about her when he was alone, but he’d had moments like that with plenty of other women without giving it a second thought.
Outside of work, he’d never had an issue hanging out with her. Well, aside from that creature she’d been married to. God, Nick hated that man. But Jason aside, Deanna and Nick could spend time together away from work without any problems. She was beer and football jerseys on game day, laughing until waiters gave them dirty looks in restaurants, and swearing at other drivers on the road. She was “that girl was an idiot for breaking up with you” and she was “oh for fuck’s sake, Nick, get your head out of your ass.”
Which made him wonder just how the hell he’d never had trouble breathing around her before. He’d never caught himself wanting to run his fingers through her long hair until after he’d felt it against his face during a moment of passion. Now that he’d held her hips in his hands, he couldn’t not notice their mouthwatering curves, especially in that skirt she’d worn today.
He shivered. However he’d missed it all before, he was well aware of it now, and she’d be in this office any second to talk about all the reasons they shouldn’t touch each other again. No matter how much he secretly wanted to again.
Get it together, Nick. She’ll be here any—
Someone knocked on his office door.
—minute.
He took a deep breath, let it out slowly, and said, “It’s open.”
The door opened, and Nick’s heart rate ratcheted higher as Deanna came in. Higher still when the door clicked shut behind her. Into the stratosphere when she made eye contact with him.
“So.” She swallowed. “You wanted to talk?”
“Yeah. I—” He halted, and not just in speech. Without realizing it, he’d taken a step toward her. More than one, in fact, and now only a few feet remained between them. It was all he could do not to back away. Step closer. Back away.
Maybe they’d be better off with his desk between them. A barrier that was more tangible than this empty space that wasn’t getting any wider.
Deanna stepped closer. “Nick?”
He dropped his gaze, hoping once he wasn’t tongue-tied by their intense eye contact, maybe his mind could catch up and figure out what to do. It didn’t help. Even with the floor to hold
his attention, he still had no idea what to say or where to start.
“Nick,” she said. “Look at me.”
Holding his breath, he lifted his gaze until he met hers.
Don’t. Nick, don’t even think about it. Yes, she’s gorgeous. Yes, she’s looking at you like that. But… don’t.
Damn it, Deanna, please. Don’t come closer. You have no idea what you’re doing to me.
Fuck, I can’t breathe. I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t not want you.
Nick, don’t…
He reached for her, and she grabbed the front of his shirt, and they came together in a desperate, demanding kiss that was long, long overdue. He slid his arm around her waist and pulled him against her, making sure she felt exactly how much she turned him on, and she ground her hips against his. Holy fuck, he wanted her.
And he knew what it was like to want a woman, but this ache, this need, went so far beyond that. As he took in her scent, kissed her, held her body against his, he could think of nothing except fucking her. Bending her over his desk, shoving her skirt up over her hips, and fucking her.
Nick was all about taking his time with women. He could draw out foreplay forever. But just like the first time they were together, he didn’t want to hold back. Every second he wasn’t inside her was positively maddening.
And wrong. Totally wrong, Nick!
He broke the kiss, panting against her lips. “Fuck, I know this is wrong,” he whispered. “But I want you.”
“I want you too, Nick,” she said. “I can’t…”
“We shouldn’t…” He sighed and touched his forehead to hers. “God, Deanna, I just can’t stop thinking about you like this.”
“I can’t either,” she whispered. “And I swear I never looked at you like this when you were with Kristina, but ever since that night…”
“I know. Me too. I have to admit, I can’t get that night out of my head, and it’s…” Heat rushed into his cheeks, and he lowered his gaze. “It’s not just because I feel guilty about it.”
“What do you mean?”
“I need to be honest,” he said, pulling away from her and pretending his heart wasn’t pounding a mile a minute. “The way things ended with Kristina hurts like hell. And I’ll settle things with her one way or the other.” He took a breath and looked at her. “But right now, I’m scared to death about how things might end with you.”
Deanna tilted her head, furrowing her brow. “What do you mean?”
“I needed to split with Kristina,” he said. “I didn’t want to, but I needed to. And I was afraid you’d be angry with me, that you wouldn’t forgive me. After… after what happened, I’m really afraid you won’t. And losing you…”
“Nick, I’m still here.” She reached for his arm like she’d so often done when he needed reassurance. Just before they made contact, though, she hesitated. Drew her hand back. Dropped her gaze.
“That’s exactly what I’m talking about,” he said. “Even if Kristina wasn’t in the picture, what happened on the beach, it’s going to change us one way or another.”
She met his eyes. “It doesn’t have to.”
“It already has.” He reached for her face, and she shivered
when he touched her cheek. “And I can’t decide if we should try to
forget it ever happened, or take it as a sign we should…”
Her eyebrows jumped. She straightened a little, which widened the distance between them by a fraction of an inch. “You don’t really think…”
“I don’t know.” He avoided the scrutiny of her eyes and watched his fingers tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “I don’t know what to think about anything, especially since every time I look at you—” he met her eyes “—I can’t think.”
She held his gaze. After a moment, she pulled him closer and whispered, “Then don’t think.” Her lips brushed his, and electricity tingled along the length of his spine.
“Deanna,” he whispered. “This…”
“I know. It’s wrong. We shouldn’t.”
“But I don’t want to stop.”
“Neither do I.”
Closing his eyes, he touched his forehead to hers. “Do you know how difficult it is to think about not doing this when you’re this close?”
“I think I have an idea, yes,” she said, and her fingertips traced the edge of his jaw. “Nick, just… kiss me.”
“Deanna, we—”
“My sister isn’t speaking to me,” she whispered, her voice shaking. “My family thinks I’m a backstabbing whore.” She pulled back enough to look him in the eye. “And I still can’t make myself believe I shouldn’t want you like this.”
“You probably shouldn’t.” He stroked her hair with an unsteady hand. “I know I shouldn’t want you like this. But honestly? This is about the only thing that feels right lately.”
“Then why are we holding back?”
Nick stopped holding back. He kissed her and ran his hand up her back and into her hair. When he grabbed her hair, she released a soft mewling sound and melted against him.
Then she slid her hand over the front of his pants, squeezing his rock hard cock through his clothes. Shuddering, he broke the kiss.
“We shouldn’t do this here,” he said.
“We shouldn’t do it at all,” she murmured, tugging at his
belt. “If we’re going to, here’s as good a place as any.”
“Christ, I love the way you think.” He kissed her hard, and damn if she couldn’t be just as aggressive as he could, forcing his lips apart with her tongue as her hands still worked at getting his belt free of the buckle. When his belt finally gave, he pushed himself off her and went for his zipper. “You might want to get your stockings out of the way.”
“I don’t think that’ll be a problem.” Deanna grinned and lifted the hem of her skirt, revealing the garter strap.
“Oh, God,” he growled, reaching for her again. “Do you have any idea how sexy that is?”
He didn’t give her a chance to answer before he kissed her. They were out of control now, kissing like they were both on the brink of insanity.
He had to have her. Right fucking now.
Nick turned her around and shoved her up against the wall. Deanna moaned, pressing her ass against his hard cock, and she shivered when he gathered her hair and laid it over her shoulder so he could kiss her neck.
“Fuck me,” she breathed. “God, Nick, I can’t wait.”
“Who said anything about waiting?” He pulled her skirt up onto her hips, groaning as his fingers brushed her bare skin. As turned on as he was, he’d be lucky if he lasted long at all, but he didn’t care. With his knee, he nudged her legs apart, and she didn’t quite suppress a soft whimper as he pushed her panties aside so his fingers could—
Holy fuck, she was wet. Wet, and hot, and tight, ready and waiting for his cock, and if he waited another minute to give her what she wanted, they’d probably both burst into flames.
With one hand on her hip and the other around his erection, he guided himself to her. The head of his cock slipped between her wet pussy lips, and before he’d even gotten used to the overwhelming sensation of being this close to fucking her, she pushed back against him and took him as deep inside her as she could from this angle.
Grunting against her neck, he gripped her hips and thrust into her. Jesus Christ, she was so tight, squeezing every inch of him so perfectly it was almost painful.
Deanna grabbed his wrist and brought his hand up to her
breast. He closed his eyes and groaned as he cupped her breast through her clothes, and he forced himself into her as deep and hard as he could.
Her shoulder moved. Again. Then her pussy tightened around him, and he realized she was touching herself while he fucked her, and goddammit he was even more turned on now. Nothing aroused him like a woman who wasn’t the least bit bashful in bed, a woman who wasn’t embarrassed at all to play with her own clit while he was inside her, and if he hadn�
��t been ready to lose his mind, he certainly was now.
Deanna moaned, her voice inching up in volume like she’d forgotten where they were. Everyone else on their floor was likely gone for the day, but Nick wasn’t taking any chances.
“Shh,” he whispered, and clapped his hand over her mouth.
Deanna shuddered against him, her muffled whimper vibrating against his palm, and she pushed back with her hips, encouraging him to fuck her faster.
Oh God, she liked this. She liked it hard, and rough, and fast, with only his hand to keep her quiet, and as she whimpered again, her pussy squeezed his cock even harder. Her shoulder and elbow moved faster, so he fucked her faster, and she sucked in a breath through her nose in the same instant her back arched off his chest, and as she came, he couldn’t even try to convince himself to hold back any longer. He buried his face against her neck, slammed into her so hard he shoved her whole body against the wall, and with a low, muffled groan, he came inside her.
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