How to Stir a Baker's Heart

by Candice Sue Patterson

  Of course it was.

  “All right, you win.” She settled in on his other side and turned off the lamp. While the bond between a boy and his dog played across the TV screen, Olivia curled into his side, relishing the connection to this man. She’d fallen in love with Blake, whether she’d intended to or not.

  38

  Fall entered like a lioness stalking its prey. Each day the air grew colder, the mornings darker, the days shorter. Red, gold, and orange leaves turned the countryside into an autumn paradise.

  Olivia slowed the car. Clouds of black smoke belched in the distance. Odd. To her knowledge there was nothing up ahead other than blueberry fields and Blake’s house.

  Her stomach did a summersault. The arsonist!

  Blake’s house had been built in 1898 by a wealthy lumber baron. Though it wasn’t a registered historic site, it fit the arsonist’s profile, as described on the evening news.

  Olivia mashed the gas pedal, willing her sluggish engine to speed faster. She turned into Blake’s driveway a little too fast. The car rocked to the left and spit gravel beneath the tires. A haze of dust collected behind her as she gained momentum to the house.

  A house that appeared to be fine.

  She threw the gears into park, turned the key, and got out, scanning every detail of the large home. Quiet. Peaceful as usual.

  Scooby lumbered to the top of the stairs, backside wiggling, waiting for her approach. The mesquite smell of smoke still hung in the air, though the dark clouds were barely distinguishable from her current vantage point.

  “Blake?”

  Olivia took the stairs two at a time, grazed a palm over Scooby’s head, and gave the door two quick knocks before bursting inside. “Blake, it’s me…I—oomph.” She smacked into Blake’s solid frame as she went around the corner toward the kitchen.

  “Steady, girl. You that excited to see me?”

  That sexy side grin she loved made the last ten minutes’ events more confusing.

  He lifted his hand and bit into a grilled cheese sandwich.

  “I saw smoke, a fire. I thought…” The heat of embarrassment filled her body. “I was afraid something bad happened.”

  Blake swallowed his bite. “We’re burning the fields today.”

  The blueberry fields?

  Over the last month, the bushes had turned a beautiful reddish-brown in preparation of winter’s slumber. “Why on earth would you burn them?”

  “It keeps them healthy.” Blake nodded toward the kitchen, indicating for her to follow. He opened the fridge for a soda. “We rotate the fields, burning the bushes every other year. It kills any pests and unwanted growth, and allows the plants to grow fuller and thicker the next year. Putting them through the fire make them stronger.”

  “We?”

  “Some friends of mine from the fire department help every fall. We’re almost done. I just came in for a quick bite to hold me over until dinner.”

  Olivia relaxed against the countertop. “I was scared to death.”

  “Concerned for me?” The can hissed as he popped the tab.

  “Yes.”

  “How concerned?”

  The toes of his boots met hers. He bent until their noses touched.

  “Very.”

  Blake’s lips grazed hers.

  “You taste like cheddar cheese.”

  “Aren’t you sweet?” He backed away and drank his soda.

  “Cheddar cheese happens to be my favorite.”

  “Really?”

  “No.” She giggled.

  Blake chewed his last bite. “As soon as they leave, I’ll pull your car into the barn and get to work.”

  “And I’ll get started in here.”

  Blake wiped his hand on the thigh of his jeans. “Big plans?”

  “Very big.”

  “Mmm, can’t wait.”

  After a little more kissing, Blake put on his coat and left her alone in his quiet house.

  She retrieved the grocery bags from her trunk and left her keys laying in the driver’s seat. She prepped the ingredients for dinner then started on dessert, her brain in a fog of giddy daydreams. Mentally, she’d come so far in the last six months. Many things factored in—the calming coastline, the supportive town, the distance between her and the ugliness back home. But most of the credit went to Blake.

  He’d shown her there was still good in the world with his big heart and never-ending patience. How to reconnect with God. How one’s identity didn’t come from their circumstances, their career, or even their family, but in the choices they made and their relationship with Christ.

  She wanted to spend forever with this man.

  Her cell buzzed with an incoming text. She pulled her hands from the soapy dish water, dried them, and went for the phone. An icy dose of reality slapped her in the face.

  I’ve called several times. Need to talk, Livi. I miss you.

  The delicious scent of the kitchen was suddenly unappealing. She hadn’t returned Justin’s calls on purpose. She missed what they’d once had, but she didn’t miss him. Not after the way he’d discarded her during her most critical time. Not after meeting Blake and discovering true love. Olivia deleted the thread. Justin was career-driven and would eventually let her go. That part of her life was in the past, and that’s where it would remain.

  An hour later, she trekked to the barn where Blake was enduring the chill to change her oil. Olivia gripped the Thermos of coffee and burrowed deeper into her scarf, blocking the wind’s whispering guilt over Justin’s text.

  She should tell Blake she’d been engaged. That her faith in men had not only been destroyed by her father’s actions, but also by her fiancé’s. The subject had never seemed important enough to discuss before, since their goal had been to keep her moving forward and away from the past. Sure, the subject would come up eventually, but in her mind it hadn’t seemed important.

  Until now.

  Blake had a right to know all her secrets. She wanted him to know. She loved him and wanted to do things right. She opened the barn door to the scent of hay and oil.

  Blake looked up from his crouched position beneath her car’s hood. “Almost done.”

  Olivia peered at the mass of components stuffed into the small front section of her vehicle. “I brought something to warm you up.”

  He swiped a shop rag from the top of his toolbox and began wiping the grease from his fingers. “I changed your oil and topped off your fluids. Tire pressure is good, however, the tread on the rear driver’s side is wearing faster than the others. Next good day we get, I’ll investigate.”

  Guilt punched her chest. “You’re too good to me.”

  “You’re too good for me.” He threw down the rag and came at her.

  “Don’t touch me with those dirty hands.”

  “These dirty hands?” He stalked closer, palms out.

  “I’m serious. Don’t do it, Blake. You’ll ruin my new shirt.”

  “Mmm, and flannel looks good on you.” He captured her lips. “Told you I’d win you over.”

  She scowled. “Don’t let it go to your head.”

  He shrugged.

  “Dinner in twenty.”

  “I’ll clean up and be right in.”

  Olivia went back to the house, calling herself all kinds of coward. The evening was too sweet to taint it with confessions. They had plenty of time to cover those things. Why bring it up tonight? She went inside and added a few more logs to the living room fire. She washed her hands, slipped on her oven mitts, and pulled a steaming deep-dish pizza from the oven. The barn door closed and Blake was visible from the window. Olivia debated whether her decision to keep silent about Justin was wise or not.

  Instead of coming inside, Blake stayed on the porch, his phone pressed to his ear, one hand braced against a porch post. Though she couldn’t hear what he was saying, his posture and the somber expression on his face said something was wrong.

  Olivia put the pizza back into the oven to warm and
wondered if the call had anything to do with his brother’s wedding invitation she’d seen in the trashcan earlier.

  The front door opened then closed. The thud of boots being removed echoed from the hall. Footsteps neared. Blake appeared. A large crease marred his forehead.

  Olivia waited as he washed up and busied herself removing the salad from the fridge, pouring drinks, and retrieving utensils. A tug on her apron strings stopped her from passing him. She turned to find he’d unraveled the bow, one string still gripped in his fingers.

  “This is one of the things about you that first got to me.”

  “My apron?”

  He nodded. “The way the bow sits perfectly in the small of your back. The way the strings sway against you when you walk.”

  She raised a brow. “Blake Hartford has a dark side.”

  He shrugged. “I’m a guy.” He tugged her closer, untying the rest of the bow and lifting the apron from around her neck. “I could get used to you cooking in my kitchen all the time.”

  “All the time? You’re one of those guys, huh?” She was teasing, of course, but the crimp between his brows deepened.

  “You know what I mean.”

  She nodded, liking the idea as well. “I could get used to cooking for you all the time.”

  Their vague confessions said so much. Like how fast and how serious this relationship was progressing. Olivia was no longer scared. She could trust Blake with her heart. Blake was her home. She stared into his dark eyes, full of love. And sadness. She put her hands on his cheeks. “What’s wrong?”

  Blake swallowed. “I just got off the phone with Brent Nichols, a buddy from high school. He owns the lumber yard where I get stuff for the house. His wife was five months pregnant with their third. She lost the baby.”

  Her hands fell to her sides. “Oh, how awful.”

  Blake’s grip at her waist tightened. “I guess it happened a few weeks ago. Her appendix burst. The doctor said under normal circumstances, the rupture would’ve killed her. Apparently, her uterus helped cushion the blow, but it broke her water. There was nothing they could do.” He sighed. “They’ve been through a lot over the years. Right after they got married, she was in a car wreck that almost took her life.”

  Why did things like this happen to good people?

  Blake cradled Olivia’s head against his chest. God caused the sun to shine, the rain to fall on the just and the unjust. Blessings fell upon God’s children and to those who refused His love. Same for trials and tribulations.

  Sometimes bad things just happened.

  Her grip on him tightened. “It’s amazing how severe a beating the human heart can withstand and still survive.”

  Blake kissed the top of her head. “God promises to restore the years the locusts have eaten.”

  “I’ve never heard that before.”

  “Old Testament. Joel.”

  Is that what God was doing, using Blake to restore the last year and a half of her hellish existence? Her conversation with Arianne in the blueberry field sprang to her mind. Was Blake the oasis at the end of her proverbial wilderness?

  He gazed deep into her eyes, communicating things she longed to hear.

  “I…” The breathiness of her own voice stopped her from confessing her feelings too soon. “I’ll pray for them.”

  “Me, too.” His gaze flicked to the counter where the salad and breadsticks waited.

  She pulled away and retrieved the pizza from the oven, then set to work cutting the slices, her mind reeling. She’d almost told Blake she loved him. But this wasn’t a marathon. There’d be plenty of time for confessions and endearments and details of failed relationships.

  No need to rush.

  39

  Olivia tipped the dustpan, dumping dirt and crumbs in the trash. In a few minutes, she’d clock-out and say goodbye to the longest week ever. They’d been working non-stop since the end of October creating a holiday menu, baking festive treats, taking pie orders for Thanksgiving, which was now only two weeks away. They’d been so busy it was hard to find time for lunch breaks most days.

  Feet and back aching, she turned to her employees standing single-file at the time clock. “Thank you all again for your help and hard work. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.”

  “Thanks for the bonus checks.” Teresa held up her envelope and smiled.

  The rest of the group thanked Olivia again, as if they hadn’t already told her a hundred times. Including Darlene. Maybe the woman was softening with holiday spirit.

  Olivia put a hand in the small of her back and stretched. Yawned. She returned the broom and dustpan to the utility closet and looked down at her rumpled work clothes. She was supposed to meet Blake for dinner tonight at a new seafood restaurant in Machias. Staying awake during the meal would be a challenge, however. Another yawn spilled from her mouth.

  Brittany slung her purse over shoulder and rubbed the back of her neck. “I have a feeling we’ll be baking nonstop until the ball drops in Time Square.”

  “I think you’re right.”

  “That review in the newspaper was exactly what we needed. I think.”

  Olivia chuckled. Since the original article in the Bangor Times in August, five other newspapers had printed the review. Their reputation had spread throughout the coast, skyrocketing business for the holidays.

  Olivia turned off the main lights, dimming the room to the visibility of the security lights. “I bought the cutest nautical Christmas ornaments last week. I’m going to go ahead and start decorating the dining room Monday.”

  Brittany silenced the radio. “Christmas is my favorite holiday. Roaring fireplaces, sweaters, snuggling by the tree.”

  Warmth crept into Olivia’s neck. She and Blake had been doing plenty of snuggling lately. Nothing too far, of course. Just enjoying the flow of the relationship. She appreciated the way he showed both his affection and respect for her.

  “Well, I’m outta here.” Brittany waved and exited to the parking lot.

  A rush of cold air barreled into the room.

  Olivia stepped into the dining area to make sure the elderly couple who had come in seconds before closing had gone so she could lock up. Just past the swinging doors, her blood froze at the figure sitting in the nook, scrolling on his phone. Her lungs refused to take in air.

  The room swayed.

  Justin.

  He saw her and stood, confident and cavalier as always in gray dress pants, a white shirt rolled up at the sleeves, and a perfectly coordinated tie. Cropped, honey-colored hair tousled at the ends as if he’d recently run his fingers through it.

  She was going to be sick.

  “Hi, Livi.”

  The familiarity with which he spoke made her stomach twist harder. Blake had whispered that same pet name in her ear hours earlier, and she much preferred it coming from his lips. The swinging door smacked her backside on its return trip, prompting her to action. She jumped and stumbled forward. “What are you doing here?”

  Justin cowered slightly and rubbed the back of his neck. “You wouldn’t return my calls or texts. I thought, maybe, I should come to you.”

  She’d needed him to come to her a year ago when she’d been sitting in a recovery room, her insides dark and cold, while patients with far worse conditions than hers rambled and begged for help as they paced the halls all night long.

  He took a tentative step closer.

  Olivia closed her eyes. God, please, let this be a nightmare. She’d finally found her footing on the slippery slope of her life. Created a new beginning. She didn’t want to revisit the past.

  “I’ve missed you.”

  She opened her eyes. This man standing before her, hands buried in his pockets, feet apart, had once been her whole world. Best friend first, then future husband. Those gray-green eyes and his self-assured smile used to turn her knees to jelly. She’d put him on a pedestal. Given him her all.

  That was her mistake. She’d put her entire trust and confidence—her happiness�
�in the people she loved, like Justin and her parents, only for them to let her down. From day one in their relationship, perhaps even before, Blake insisted she love the Lord more than him. God was a safe place to put her trust, her confidence, her happiness.

  Justin rocked back on his heels. “Say something,” he whispered.

  Olivia took a deep breath, the previous unknowns in her life shifting and locking into place. “I don’t know what to say.”

  He studied the floor. Nodded. Looked back at her with love. Fear. “You look good. Content. Happy.”

  “I am.”

  “Good. I want you to be happy.”

  “Is that why you’re here?”

  A loud whoosh of air left his lips. “I asked for some time to clear my head, assess life, make sure we were doing the right thing.” He closed the distance and covered her elbows with his palms. “I’ve no doubt now how much I love you, how much I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

  Now that the hard part was over. “I haven’t heard from you in almost a year.”

  “I know.” His thumbs rubbed her arms, forehead knotted in a frown. “I know. I just…wanted to be a hundred percent sure. You deserve that. And…you needed time to heal.” His forehead pressed against hers. “I’m sorry, Livi.”

  Sorry? An apology didn’t erase the scary uncertainty of her future, the months of loneliness he’d forced her to endure. Yet, it was strangely OK. God had given her something better. “I forgive you, Justin.”

  His palms went to her face and his smile of relief turned serious as he bent to kiss her.

  Olivia pushed at his chest. “I forgive you, but we can’t go back.”

  He leaned away, still holding her.

  “It took me a long time to find my identity again. It’s not in you, or my parents, or my job. It’s in God. I’ve started over. And started seeing myself through God’s eyes. I don’t want my past anymore.”

  Justin’s hands fell away. “How can you say that? We’ve always been together. A team since we were kids.”

  “Where was my teammate when my life was spiraling out of control? Where was he at during those black days and even darker nights after I left the hospital? I could’ve used some help. You left.”