Pride & Princesses

by Summer Day

  I looked up instantly.

  ‘It’s Mark Knightly glancing at us from across the room. Don’t stare. You’re being very obvious,’ she whispered.

  We could overhear Freya talking at the opposite table...

  ‘So, how did you find out he was rich?’

  ‘Well, by the water fountain, on my way here...’Brooke added.

  ‘By the water fountain,’ Teegan repeated. ‘That’s starting to sound very romantic.’

  ‘Exactly. Anyway, I heard him talking about a rich uncle in Scotland who’s planning to leave him a castle after he croaks...’

  ‘I wish my uncle would leave me a castle. Then we’d never have to worry about our college funds.’ Mouche said grimly.

  ‘Never mind. We’re going to be self-made women, Mouche. By the way, are they serious? I’m not sure if castles in Scotland are worth that much but maybe we should move him to the number one spot on our list...just in case,’ I joked and considered removing Jet’s name (even though his family owned multiple companies – according to Teegan - and she googles everyone) with the stroke of a pen.

  Mouche instantly picked up her pink pen and drew another line straight through Jet Campbell and wrote Mark Knightly over it and added a bunch of love hearts. Then she scrawled: wildly rich - major possibilities.

  ‘That’s so twelve years old Mouche. I never knew you were such a gold digger.’

  Underneath Mark’s name she made a space for his advantages / disadvantages / physical attributes columns. We haven’t filled that out yet.

  ‘Objectively speaking, money is just a bonus and I could never actually marry a man for that, even if my college fund is depleted.’ Mouche said.

  ‘Who said anything about marrying? Perhaps we should wait until one of us has actually had a proper conversation with him first.’

  ‘You’re right. I doubt marriage is even legal at our age.’

  ‘Oh great, one o’clock, Miss Tartt...’ I whisper, hoping not to draw attention to myself.

  ‘Hello girls. Did you have a good summer?’

  ‘Yes Miss Tartt,’ I said. Mouche started to smile as I spoke.

  Miss Tartt is a failed Broadway actress with shortish sticky-out red hair and the figure of a former dancer who’s started to binge eat just a little too often. She doesn’t like me. Competition. She gives me looks that could kill roses. I don’t think it’s very professional to behave that way. Like, when we had try-outs for last year’s fashion show, she made me re-audition about ten times and waited right until the end to call my name as part of the ensemble. And only a few dance majors were available.

  ‘Hi Miss Tartt,’ one of the boys called out from across the room. Boys can be rude like that.

  Miss Tartt should have ignored him, as etiquette might dictate but, never one to shrink like a violet, Miss Tartt actually said, ‘hello boys,’ in a very theatrical voice.

  I’m so embarrassed for her. The guys certainly seemed to like it though. Obviously, she needs our future dating guide. We’ll add advice for older women.

  ‘Do you have an audition piece ready for try-outs, Mouche?’

  ‘I didn’t realize they were on today, Miss Tartt. I’m thinking of working behind the scenes.’

  ‘Oh. Well, they’re 3pm sharp. See you both there. Oh, and Mouche?’

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘I’d just love it if you could help design the costumes again.’

  ‘Oh, yeah, sure,’ Mouche said, trying not to sound too enthusiastic.

  After Miss Tartt left, Freya joined us and mocked Mouche.

  ‘Oh, that would be marvellous, Miss Tartt...ew...you two are such suck ups. That woman is totally skeezie – no wonder you’re both her favourite students in the whole world...she’s only nice because she wants you to do her dirty work...’

  ‘Ah, I believe that is your modus operandi, Freya,’ Mouche said.

  ‘You know, she’s just a teacher who really wants to be an actor and keeps casting herself in the lead role – Tory’s role,’ Freya replied.

  ‘I think that might be Phoebe’s role you’re confusing with Tory’s role, Freya,’ Mouche said.

  Mouche and Freya both had a point.

  Freya huffed off and said, ‘later girls,’ as if we were all friends.

  Suddenly Mouche leaned in and stepped lightly on my toe under the table.

  ‘Mark Knightly is walking back this way. See if you can convince him to talk...’

  We put our notes away in a pink folder.

  I was busy reading How to Please your Potential Husband. Mouche had opened up A Woman’s Guide to Bringing out the Best in Her Man – Part 1; The Approach.

  ‘I’m so not ready for the approach. We’ve never even spoken,’ I added with hesitation.

  ‘Well, I’m ready now – first cab off the rank and all that.’

  This could be like watching a train wreck in motion and I was nervous for Mouche. After all, she was just as inexperienced as me at proper dating and bound to make a fool of herself with an older, more mature man.

  Freeze the image:

  We were all alone in the cafeteria by then, since almost everyone else had left for study hall. Freya, Teegan, Brooke and Tory had drifted off. The chatter had quietened down and we hardly noticed Mark and Jet again, so immersed were we in reading our guidebooks and finalizing ‘The Plan.’

  My dating guide was open on a page titled;

  How to Attract Your Prey:

  • Always be neat

  • Wear a bright shade of lipstick

  • Use sweet smelling perfume

  • Always be interested in your man’s conversation

  • Make sure your hair is soft and shiny so he can rub his hands in it

  • Make sure you wear attractive, feminine clothing; skirts and dresses are uniquely female...

  I’m wondering if this old-fashioned advice could get much worse. I quickly close the guide.

  ‘It would be enough to make my mother retch,’ Mouche says, ‘she collects these guides as a joke.’

  Suddenly Mark is walking towards us.

  ‘Our ‘man-friendly’ looks are definitely getting us noticed....’

  ‘Or is that our cousin’s unfounded reputations?’ Mouche whispers. ‘Boys think the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree so we need to act remote.’

  ‘If he talks, you should talk,’ I replied.

  ‘Just ignore him,’ Mouche says, as Mark walks straight past us on the way to study hall.

  ‘Well, that conversation went smoothly,’ I said.

  ‘Give him time, Pheebs. Guys are analytical and need extra moments to process attraction...’

  I laughed as we walked to English but my expression changed to disappointed when I realized Mark and Jet had ditched the class.

  ‘As has been the case from time immemorial, while the boys ditched, the girls worked...the boys hunted...the girls gathered...’

  I was reading over my history notes in study hall after Mark and Jet had successfully managed to abscond. I saw them leave the car park via my study hall window, but nobody as yet recognized Jet’s car and from a distance they looked like teachers....albeit very rich ones.

  ‘Second week of school and they’re already in trouble,’ Freya stated.

  ‘I just love bad boys,’ Teegan replied.

  After biology, which I’d slept through, history was cancelled but our classes were late so although I’d also tried to ditch along with Mouche, we got caught in the entrance hall (or exit hall in our case). The teachers are more than a little militant at the start of the semester, but luckily, they let us off with a warning.

  ‘Sometimes I just can’t wait for school to be over so I can start my real life,’ Brooke mused like a child.

  ‘Social skills are far more important than intelligence; it says so right here.’ I whispered to Mouche in the library.

  ‘I’m not so sure about that,’ our teacher said, eavesdropping.

  ‘We need to network!’ Mouche passed me a
note attached to the diary. Page nine was open with all our gathered quotes from man-dating guides of yesteryear attached. The basis for the diary was gaining some real momentum.

  ‘Honestly, if school is just like a microcosm of the real world, it’s a wonder any of us survives it. At least in the real world you can hide from people you hate,’ I whispered just as Freya walked by, a little too close to my ballet slippers for comfort. Behind her, her twisted sisters trailed like ducks near a pond. They were caught leaving by the overly zealous teacher and had been herded up like cattle. Now they’re all chewing gum in retaliation; so ninth grade.

  Freya ‘accidentally’ kicked over my bag as she entered the room.

  ‘Oops, sorry,’ she said. Usually, she travels in a pack. It makes it a lot easier to disguise her evil intentions.

  Chapter 6

  Swim team

  ‘Throughout history, women’s moral behavior has always been highly scrutinized...males have had social freedoms women were seemingly unaware of...these freedoms were kept from women not just because of biology but because men invented the patriarchal rules...’ I was glued to A History of Suffrage in the back seat of the bus as we embarked on our trip to the swimming centre.

  ‘What does patriarchy mean?’ I asked Mouche.

  She instantly looked it up.

  ‘It’s like...society is male-dominated, so women have to fit in with rules they didn’t create but then they help to maintain them...otherwise, I guess, society as we know it...would break down completely...’

  ‘Oh,’ I sort of understood. It was like Mark and Jet escaping while we had to stay and be bored in study hall. Maybe they were just smarter, or quicker or something.

  ‘And maybe they are just male...because according to your literature...being male might be enough to let you progress easily through life,’ Miss Tartt was way bitter and overheard us as we snapped the pages shut. She really wasn’t ready to hear this stuff. She needed to focus on prettying up and being nice to other women in particular. Then people would take her seriously and she could study the history of feminism but still husband hunt.

  ‘It’s good to know the history of our sexual struggle,’ Mouche said, ‘but we so don’t want to become like her...’ Miss Tartt wandered off the bus after taking the roll. I was so glad she wasn’t going to be coming along to pass judgement on my freestyle.

  I’d also been relieved to wave Freya and Brooke goodbye at the bus stop but dismayed to learn that Mouche and I are two of only six girls on the swim team. Teegan and Tory are going with us because they are quite athletic and always compete with Mouche and me in everything. Brooke and Freya are waving us off, standing on the pavement. Brooke is wearing her latest crucifix because she has recently found religion and is working on her ‘do unto others’ motto. Proof of this is the magnanimous smile colouring her expression. She’s also considering the benefit of ‘dressing more modestly’, but worried she may not fit in with her junior sorority sisters.

  Meanwhile, Teegan, Freya, and Tory have decided to dress entirely inappropriately for the morning. It’s uncharacteristically cold and none of them have sweaters. Teegan occasionally pretends to be my friend, so I mock smile and try to be ‘friendly’ in return. Freya, meanwhile, is trying hard to impress Mark who has barely looked at her. So sad. As Mrs Jones might have said, ‘those girls need to play hard to get.’

  Still, as I sat on the back seat of the bus watching the Princesses through the window, waving and pretending to be supportive of me, as they chat to each other, I have to admit I’m not sure even I have the restraint to act indifferently towards someone I like. I hold that thought as Teegan and Tory reach their seats.

  Everyone is seated, the bus takes off and lurches forward as I’m leaning over my tote bag searching for my iPOD. Gravity pushes me into the back of the seat in front.

  I steady myself. Mouche, seated next to me, smiles and whispers, ‘this should be fun, any excuse for extra-curricular activities with the boys and Princesses can barely contain their enthusiasm.’

  I nod in knowing agreement and flick through my playlist. Mouche is busy updating our future blog – the secret one of course, the one we carry in diary form. This one is for our eyes only. Mouche will update the official Sunrise News Blog after the Fall Fling. We’ve decided to go with a traditional headline ‘Possible Prom Themes’ then upload an article titled: Prom Themes Throughout History with the by-line - vapid possibilities from previous junior years - Underwater World, Chicago 1930, Movie Star Couples (the usual). No sense running with the lead story of two girls dating themselves into history until it’s ready.

  Mouche was going to quit the swim team to concentrate on her academic classes but I persuaded her to come with me. ‘It is a known fact that ladies need strenuous exercise just as much as men...’ I told Mouche using received pronounciation.

  ‘Which guide did you get that from?’

  ‘I don’t know, I think I heard the sentiments in Little Women.’

  ‘Oh, I love that story.’

  ‘Me too.’

  There aren’t very many people who swim and as luck would have it, Mark and Jet and Alex and Tom are riding the bus as well.

  ‘I’ve often noted that swimming tends to do beautiful things to shoulders. You can see the results in the broad arm muscles of the boy sitting in front of me, his face slightly obscured by the headrest of the seat,’ I whispered to Mouche.

  Of course, I’m describing Mark.

  When he turns his head Mouche stifles a giggle as I unwrap some gum, offer her some and innocently observe the world outside the bus windows.

  ‘He’s very uptight,’ Mouche scrawled on the side of her note page, shoving it in front of me.

  ‘He still hasn’t spoken to me but earlier today, he offered to help me lift my bag when the locker door was stuck,’ I said softly.

  ‘Chivalry is so not over yet,’ Mouche added, ‘Oh, fabulous, Tom Allen just glanced my way. Guess what? Teegan and Tory have decided to flirt with all the boys on our behalf. Don’t they realize none of us are ready for the approach since we’ve barely had time to read the copious quantities of old-fashioned dating literature we found in the closets of our slummy mommies?’

  ‘I loved it when you used to jokingly answer the telephone with those immortal words, Hello this is Mrs Mouche’s brothel…’

  ‘I was only twelve…’

  ‘Our mothers weren’t quite as fond of the introduction as I recall...’

  The bus had stopped at a red light by this time. Suddenly Teegan crawled out of her seat and made her way to the back of the vehicle.

  ‘Hi Pheebs,’ Teegan said as if she was my best friend.

  I smiled tepidly. Mouche had her ears blocked with music.

  ‘Hi Mark,’ Teegan continued. ‘I can’t wait for you to pick us up Saturday tonight.’

  Mark looked over at Jet as if Teegan had gone nuts, and then gave her a reluctant smile. Both Teegan and Tory smiled back and I was embarrassed for everyone and pretended to be writing, but the road ahead was bumpy so after a few minutes I stopped.

  ‘I forgot to tell you, Freya and Brooke are Jet’s neighbours. They’ve been ‘noticing’ him for years and Freya even spread a vicious rumor that she has webcam images of Jet doing it with an ex!’ I whispered.

  ‘So possibly illegal, to spread publicity unasked, but Brooke doesn’t care. She thinks she’s above the law. No doubt the footage is inspired because Jet is very sporty and buff. I’m not sure if Teegan and Tory realize just how popular Jet could become,’ Mouche added with a smile.

  ‘He’s good natured, too,’ I whispered after Jet had helped Mouche with her jacket and bags. ‘It seems like nothing is a trouble to him.’

  ‘Brooke and Freya act like eager fans when Jet is around. Although they are as obsessed with Mark as everyone else, he has blatantly ignored them and even the Princesses get a little hurt when boys like him look down on girls like them.’ Mouche said.

  ‘They treat Jet with th
e reverence of a fan base and look up to him. Brooke was once overheard in the cafeteria saying, ‘of course we’re lucky to be his neighbours but we could be totally torn apart if it came to fighting over Jet.’

  Thankfully, Mark and Jet had their earplugs safely in their ears by this point.

  ‘Girls like the Princesses learn to be nice to boys at a young age. Perhaps their mothers teach them,’ Mouche whispered, ‘Brooke and Freya have loads of money and their walk-in closets are twice the size of Teegan’s and Tory’s who make up for this slight disadvantage with extra stylish ensembles.’