Embody

by Jamie Magee

  “What time is it?” I asked

  “Three.”

  “That’s all? It feels like it should be later,” I said.

  Landen nodded and sat on the leather couch, then reached for me to come to his side. “Did the kids not say ‘we get to stay the night’ this morning? I wonder what changed their mind?” I said, nestling in Landen’s arms.

  “I think we all left there with a different perspective,” he answered, playing with my long dark hair. I looked up at him and saw his eyes lost somewhere in space.

  “What did you and Pelhan talk about?” I whispered.

  Landen sighed deeply and held me tighter. “He said that if I ever tried to stop you from doing something you wanted to do – that I would lose you.”

  I could feel his grief; it was as if he’d already lost me in his thoughts.

  “Landen, you are not going to lose me. We belong to each other,” I said, kissing his hand.

  “Pelhan said that I’ve made that mistake before - and that we both paid the price,” he said, turning to look in my eyes.

  “You cannot carry the burden of mistakes that we made. I’m more than sure that my stubbornness pushed you,” I said, trying not to cry or think of a time that either of us belonged to another.

  Landen smiled a small smile, then stared somewhere inside me. “He said we had to teach our family. That we asked them to live this life and play the roles they’re in,” he said, filling with dread.

  “I was told the same thing. I got the impression that if we didn’t teach them, we’d end up hurting them, not protecting them,” I said. Landen nodded, agreeing with me.

  “Aora told me to teach Olivia first,” I confessed.

  Landen tilted his head, a little confused. “When is Dane’s birthday?” he asked.

  “July first. Why?”

  “Pelhan told me that there’s a Cancer that’s always served as a protector not only to you, but that I should also teach first. I thought he was talking about Marc because he’s a Cancer. Honestly, I’d rather teach Dane,” he explained.

  I laughed a little. “Why is that?”

  “You saw how Marc reacted that day in the field. He’s not ready for this,” Landen said, biting his lower lip.

  “Do you think he found her yet, his soulmate?” I asked.

  “He only left this morning. I think it’s going to take him a while.”

  “How long are you going to give him before you look for him?” I asked.

  “I don’t know. A week or so. He doesn’t want any help. I think he’s made that abundantly clear,” Landen said, stretching out.

  “I don’t think it’ll be that hard to teach Olivia or Dane. They’ve both seen so much in such a short time...nothing will surprise them,” I said, laying my head on his shoulder.

  “Yeah, but think about Clarissa and Chrispin. Chrispin is so angry; I don’t think he’s ready,” Landen said, yawning.

  “And Clarissa?”

  “I don’t know. Clarissa never reacts the way you think she will,” he said in a hushed voice. Silence took over for a moment. I looked up at Landen; he looked like he was almost asleep. I closed my eyes and let myself drift.

  Chapter Nine

  It seemed like only seconds had passed before the breathtaking pain on my chest took effect; I had done something wrong, this was my nightmare. It had been months since my last one, but the memory of the pain never left me. My breaths were short. I felt my skin boil. I tried to focus to find whoever had called me here to face Drake and wake up. I started telling myself that I’d been here before, that this was old news. As my eyes came into focus, I realized that I wasn’t in Drake’s grey dimension, like all the ones before; instead, I was in another time. The weight on my chest intensified as images of me and Drake lying in a field holding one another flashed by. Other images came as the weight on my chest had all but taken my breath: a wedding, a family, an entire life given to Drake. The necklace on my chest and the ring on my hand sent a blinding glow in front of me, shielding the images from my view.

  I felt a strong pull on me. As my eyes flew open, I was gasping for air. I was awake in the condo, and Landen was on his knees in front of me, shaking my shoulders. I stood up quickly and brushed off my chest. “Did you see one?” I screamed, remembering the demons that I saw on my friends Jessica and Hannah.

  “No, no,” he said over my scream. He stopped my hands from constantly brushing off my chest, then pulled me to him and held me as tight as he could. I slowly sat back down. Landen’s arms loosened as he sat on the table in front of me.

  “I’m sorry, Willow, I didn’t even know I was sleeping,” he said, rubbing my hands.

  “It’s not your fault. I saw you sleeping, and I should’ve woken you up. I should’ve focused, but I let myself drift.”

  “Come on,” Landen said, standing

  “Where are we going?” I asked, refusing to stand – knowing his intent was to run.

  “Home. I’m not going to risk this,” he said, furious now with Drake.

  “We are not running away. We know what we did wrong; we’ll be more careful,” I said, pulling his arm so he’d sit down.

  He gave in to my request and sat on the table in front of me. He let his elbows rest on his knees and buried his face in his hands; I don’t know if he could see my intent or if he were afraid that if he denied my request he’d lose me, as Pelhan had warned. I leaned forward and kissed the hand that wore my matching ring. Landen rose up and looked at me, then at his ring.

  “The ring is what woke me up,” he said in awe. “I felt it burning my hand. When I woke up, I saw you asleep, breathless.”

  “The rings kept me safe, too,” I said, smiling as I felt Landen’s fears dwindle.

  “Did you help anyone?” he asked, looking for something positive to come out of this.

  I sighed. “There was no one for me to help this time,” I said, looking away from Landen.

  From my composure, he knew I didn’t want to elaborate, and he wasn’t going to force me. I reached up to the charm on my neck and traced the crescent moon with my fingertips, and silence came with a peace that we gave in to. Moments later, we felt the others approaching, full of energy and anticipation. The door opened, and as their pink Auras filled the room, it was easy to see the companionship they all felt with one another.

  “Look here, guys, the king and queen have decided to grace us with their presence,” Chrispin mocked.

  Landen rolled his eyes, and Chrispin received a sharp jab in the ribs from Olivia.

  “Hey, I’m only teasing,” Chrispin said, wrapping his arm around Olivia, then smiling at me and Landen.

  Olivia and Clarissa had handfuls of bags from a full day of shopping. I was glad I’d missed that occasion; shopping was my least favorite thing to do. Clarissa handed Dane a few bags.

  “We got you guys some clothes. No black tonight,” Clarissa said, walking over to me. “You come with us, young lady,” she said, pulling me up from my comfort zone.

  Landen stood and stretched. “Does that mean we get to dress Landen?” Dane said in a teasing manner.

  “I think I can handle dressing myself,” Landen said, playfully punching Dane in the arm. Before we knew it Landen, Dane, and Chrispin were in a full wrestling match.

  Clarissa shook her head and pulled me to the double doorway on the left side of the room.

  “Don’t break anything,” she yelled as she closed the door.

  All we could hear was a roar of laughter. “Mom told me boys never really grow up,” she said, sitting the bags on the large bed that centered the room.

  Olivia started to pull all the outfits out of the bags, and my mouth dropped when I saw all the bright colors. “Don’t worry, Willow, we got you a deep blue dress to wear,” Olivia said, smiling back at me.

  “So how was it? That dimension? Does Pelhan look as old as he is?” Clarissa asked as she plugged in curling irons and laid out cosmetics all over the counter.

  “They don’t
look any older than Rose,” I said, sitting on the edge of the bed and staring at Olivia, wondering how I was going to teach her to do anything that I could do.

  “They?” Clarissa questioned

  “Aora – Pelhan’s soul mate; she’s the same age,” I explained.

  “I’ve never heard of her. Is she just as deep as Pelhan?” Clarissa asked me.

  I nodded. “Maybe even deeper,” I said under my breath.

  I felt the tension rise in the room. Clarissa and Olivia looked at one another, then back to me; I knew they were thinking of the photo of me and Drake. “Well, how about we put all the philosophy behind us for a few hours and enjoy ourselves? Worry is never good for the skin,” Clarissa said, pulling me into the bathroom. I sat in front of the vanity and looked at my reflection. I could see the worry in my eyes; it was aging me. I let out a deep breath and smiled at Clarissa’s reflection above me. “We are not leaving this room until we are so gorgeous that we stop traffic,” she said, feeling sure of herself. I nodded and let Olivia and Clarissa use me as their Barbie doll.

  An hour later, Dane knocked on the door. “Just as a reminder, we do have reservations, and we’re almost an hour away with traffic,” he said through the door.

  “Hold your horses...good things come to those who wait,” Clarissa yelled back.

  All three of us staring at our reflection in the mirror. It was hard to believe we were the same girls that walked into this room. Our hair was pulled back perfectly, with long baby curls stretching down our backs. I don’t think I’d ever seen any of us wear this much make-up. It looked natural on us, but at the same time it enhanced the features we were known for. The dresses they had bought framed us perfectly; in fact, they seemed to make our small frames even more detailed. Also, the heels we were wearing sculpted our calves.

  “We should really do this more often,” Olivia said, looking across at mine and Carissa’s reflections.

  “I don’t feel like myself,” I said, leaning close and looking into my emerald eyes, which were framed in black liner.

  “Good, then I did my good deed for today,” Clarissa said, giggling.

  “They’re impatient; we better go,” I said, taking in a deep breath.

  I felt nervous, like I did at my celebration. I was eager to see Landen’s reaction to the way I looked, eager to see all of their Auras.

  “Let’s go,” Olivia said, grabbing her small purse.

  Clarissa put her hands on the double doors, then looked back at me and winked. She pulled the doors open, and the three of us stood there. The guys were lost in conversation on the couch. Landen looked up first; his eyes met mine, and I felt butterflies in my stomach as a smile came across his face and a blush of red spread through his Aura. The three guys were all tie-less and wearing light suits, and Landen had on a baby blue shirt that seemed to call his eyes out even more than usual. He stood slowly. Dane and Chrispin turned to see us standing in the doorway; they were wordless, and the entire room filled with a blush of red.

  “Um...we could always order in,” Dane said, smiling at Clarissa.

  “Not a chance,” Clarissa said, walking to his side.

  I stood frozen, locked in a stare with Landen. He then crossed the room to me, and everyone else disappeared. When he reached me, he cradled my face with his hands. I could feel his love and passion; it was beautiful. “Each time I think it’s impossible for you to be more beautiful, you prove me wrong,” he thought, kissing me softly.

  “Come on, guys,” Olivia said, pulling my arm.

  When the elevator doors opened on the first floor, an elegant lobby came into view. It was full of people passing in and out of large spinning doors that lined the front of the building. As we stepped off the elevator, the entire room of people seemed to turn and look in our direction. I felt their envy as we passed through the lobby.

  “I don’t know about traffic, but I see heads turning,” Clarissa whispered to me.

  Landen heard her, and his grin widened. He wrapped his arm around me. Dane walked to the doorman to tell him we were ready to leave. A moment later, a long white limo pulled up in front of the building.

  “Is this really necessary?” I whispered to Landen.

  “I think we’ve earned a few hours away from all of this,” he thought as he led me through the moving door.

  Once on the open street, a rush of every emotion of every kind came through me, and I grew stiff as I tried to block them all out. Landen could feel them, too, but he seemed to handle them better than I did. He all but carried me to the limo, hoping once inside we’d be able to find some kind of relief. The others followed us. As the limo drove away, Dane looked over to me and Landen. “Are you guys OK?” he asked.

  It still amazed me how observant he was. Landen nodded.

  “The place we’re going to is as private as you can get in New York. I don’t think it’ll bother either of you too much,” Dane continued. “We made the reservations the night I met Clarissa; that’s how long it takes to get a table there.”

  Landen nodded and looked down at me to make sure I was OK. As the limo drove through the busy streets, I stared out the window. It was easy to see without any insight those who were angry or weak; those emotions seemed to be like a vacuum that took all their color. I noticed the awkward shapes and dark spots in person after person, and I doubted they ever truly realized just how valuable their energy was.

  “I talked to Chrispin and Dane about meditation,” Landen thought.

  I looked up at him. “And?”

  “They want to try it when we get back.”

  “Chrispin, too?”

  Landen nodded and smiled in Chrispin’s direction.

  “Did you tell him about Livingston?”

  “I told him that if he found peace, the grief wouldn’t hurt anymore. That seemed to be enough for now.”

  As the limo made its way through the city streets, I noticed that we were leaving the heart of the city.

  “Are we going the right way?” Landen asked, noticing the stillness in the streets.

  Dane nodded yes. “This restaurant is in the middle of a city block, underground. From the outside, it looks like another apartment building.”

  “How did you find it?” I asked.

  Dane looked at Clarissa, and they both began to laugh.

  “I met Clarissa around 8 AM. We started to walk, just talking, and eight hours later we found ourselves in this neighborhood. It started to rain, so we followed someone in and sat on the stairs, waiting for the rain to pass. We kept noticing people dressed really nice coming in and going down the stairs, and we thought it was odd, so we followed a couple down and found this restaurant. It’s supposedly one of the best kept secrets in New York,” Dane explained.

  The limo stopped, and I looked out through the window and saw a very ordinary city neighborhood; tall brick buildings with wide stoops in front of them. There were people pushing strollers, walking dogs, jogging. I looked at Landen and raised my eyebrows. We both felt over dressed. Dane was right, though: the emotions were way more calm here than they were in the heart of the city.

  The door to the limo opened, and we all climbed out. Dane and Clarissa led us up the wide stoop in front of us. Once inside, we walked down one flight of stairs. There were two large oak doors at the base of the stairs, and a man in a tux was standing in front of them. He must have remembered Dane because he smiled when he saw him and opened the door for us.

  Inside, I could hear a low hum of conversation and music playing softly. There was artwork along the walls, and sculptures and modern art displayed erratically throughout the open room. The back wall was a vast aquarium with exotic fish gliding through deep blue water.

  A woman approached us, and Dane gave her our name. She then led us around the aquarium to where tables were nestled against the wall, all private from one another. In the center of the room, a violinist and pianist were playing softly, and couples were dancing slowly around them. The woman led us to a large round
booth on the left side of the room. Behind the booth was a small square window that viewed the street level.

  “You can see out, but they cannot see in,” the woman said, tilting her head to the window and smiling at all of us. Landen and I took the seat across from the window, Dane and Clarissa slid to the middle, and Olivia and Chrispin sat across from us.

  I didn’t pay attention to the anything else the lady said; I was too busy staring out the window and watching all the people and colors. Even here, I could see the couples that were soulmates; the white line connected them, connected their children.

  “You guys are something else. We’re in this beautiful place, and the two of you just stare out the window,” Clarissa said, waving her hand in front of my face.

  I snapped out of my stare and looked up at Landen. I hadn’t realized that he’d been lost in the colors just as I was. We both grinned at each other.

  Chrispin turned around to look out the window. “You see colors here, too?” he asked.

  “What colors?” Olivia asked, turning around. Dane and Clarissa looked out the window as well.

  “They’re going to teach us to meditate so we can see energy the way they do,” Chrispin said to Olivia.

  “Hey, what about us?” argued Clarissa.

  “Us, too,” Dane said, pulling Clarissa to him.

  “I already know how to meditate. Remember, Willow, we took that class with Jessica?” Olivia said, looking at me.

  I shook my head no. “I don’t think we grasped it then.”

  “Is it hard?” asked Clarissa

  “You just dream, but you’re awake,” Landen said, still staring out the window.

  “That makes a lot of sense,” Clarissa mocked. “So what did you do - flip some kind of switch and now you see colors all the time?”

  Landen shrugged his shoulders.

  “Can you feel the energy?” Olivia asked in a low tone, leaning forward.

  Landen looked down at me, and we both blushed a little. We never answered her question, but I’m sure they got the impression that we could. When the waitress came back, we placed our orders, then Olivia and Chrispin disappeared to look at the art in the front room. Dane and Clarissa were lost in their own conversation, and Landen and I continued our gaze out the window. Occasionally, we’d laugh at the reaction we saw in the people outside.