Five Star Desire

by Jacquelin Thomas

  “Yeah, I was kind of hoping that you would be my date.”

  “I hate missing it—but if I went, I wouldn’t be any fun. My mind is too preoccupied right now.”

  “I understand.” Kellen stood in her path, blocking her escape. “I need to know. Am I the reason you’re leaving?”

  “Not really,” she responded. “I mean...partly. I just can’t think straight right now.”

  “I didn’t mean to add any stress to your life.”

  “You didn’t, Kellen. I’m just super emotional right now. I’ve been working a lot, and I think a few days away will do me good. Please promise me that you’re not going to try and follow me.”

  “I give you my word.” He pulled her close to him and kissed her on the lips. “I’ll see you when you get back, then.”

  She gave him a tiny smile. “It’s a date.”

  * * *

  “I can’t believe that you’re actually thinking of settling down and having a family,” Blaze whispered to Kellen, leaning forward. “I thought you were going to hang on to your singleness for a while longer.” They sat outside on the balcony of Ari’s condo.

  He agreed. “That was the original plan, but things changed for me when Dreyden died. I just think differently now, especially with Addison having my baby.”

  “Do you love her or is this because she’s carrying your child?”

  “I do love her,” Kellen confirmed. “I would still want to marry her even if she weren’t pregnant, Blaze.” He grinned. “I’ve never met a woman like her.”

  Blaze signaled to Ari to join them.

  “You need to hear this,” he told him. “Kellen, tell him what you just told me.”

  Kellen laughed. “I know. I just lost my playa card permanently. I told Blaze that I really love Addison, and that I’ve never met anyone like her.”

  Ari busted into a grin.

  “Hey, didn’t Ryan tell us that men in excellent health were about 89 percent more likely to die if they were single compared to married men? I know that I gave you guys a hard time for your declarations of love and adoration, but now I know what you meant. Addison’s changed my life.”

  “We’re happy for you,” Ari said. “We can certainly use some good news right about now.”

  Blaze and Kellen both agreed.

  “Have you proposed to her yet?”

  He nodded. “I just haven’t convinced her to say yes, Ari. She is going away for a few days to think about everything.”

  “Does she love you?” asked Blaze.

  “She does, but she won’t admit it to herself,” Kellen responded. “She is worried about how it would look to the rest of her employees. She’s also bothered that she’s five years older than me.”

  Ari shrugged in nonchalance. “Age doesn’t matter.”

  “I told her that.”

  Blaze reached for his glass of wine. “Just be sure that Addison loves you as much as you seem to love her. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

  “I know that she loves me. It’s in her eyes whenever she looks at me.”

  “Do you know where she’s going?”

  Kellen shook his head. “She wouldn’t tell me. Addison knew I’d follow her there. She made me give her my word that I’d give her some space.”

  Chapter 19

  Addison didn’t leave until early the next morning.

  The lane was long and straight, unpaved, leading to a beachfront, two-story house in Malibu with white siding and black shutters. Addison stared at it, impressed with the amount of work Tia and her husband had put into this property. It had been a foreclosure they discovered and fell in love with, so they decided to purchase the property and give it a complete overhaul.

  She looked around. There were not any neighbors nearby. The land surrounding the house was spattered sparsely with palm trees.

  Isolated.

  Inside the house, Addison sat her leather weekender on the sofa.

  The master bedroom was on the second level and large, with a double dresser, mirror and a sturdy pine bed. The coverlet was teal and lacy. Addison wasn’t surprised at the choice in color because it was one of Tia’s favorites.

  The room was too pretty.

  Too perfect, Addison thought as she put her bag on a chair beside the nightstand.

  She took her clothes out and put them in the dresser.

  A cosmetic bag held toiletries—soap, shampoo, toothbrush, deodorant. Those she took to the bathroom.

  She didn’t allow her thoughts to take over until she had unpacked. Addison sat down on the edge of the bed.

  I’m pregnant, and I’m keeping the baby. What does this mean for my career?

  Kellen says that he wants to marry me. I don’t want to get married just because I’m pregnant. I do have feelings for him, though.

  The flat-screen TV held little interest and the book she’d brought with her had hit a dull spot.

  She sat on the porch, watching the ocean. Addison had no idea how long she sat out there, but she didn’t move to go inside until her stomach started making low, guttural noises.

  She had a salad for dinner.

  Addison was in bed before ten o’clock.

  Saturday morning, Addison was up early and back on the porch. Huge cumulus clouds bobbed along in a sea of blue as the sun rose higher and the day began to get hot.

  Hours later she sat curled up on the couch with her book, but Addison was having trouble keeping her mind on the story line. She tried to go back to her book, but her mind kept wandering. She found herself looking out the window and down the length of sandy beach.

  The late-summer air seemed to be holding its breath, waiting for something. She felt that same sense of anticipation inside her like the flutter of butterfly wings. A strange feeling came over Addison. Something was about to happen.

  Addison got up to get a bottle of water when she felt a sharp pain, which caused her to double over.

  She sat back down. It was too soon to feel the baby kicking. Addison had read in one of the pregnancy books that it wasn’t uncommon to experience aches and pains. She swallowed her fear and decided to stay put for a while.

  Addison went from calm to panic in a matter of minutes when she realized that she was spotting. She reached for her phone and pressed 9-1-1.

  “I’m pregnant. Please don’t let me lose my baby,” she cried when the paramedics reached her.

  They wasted no time in getting her to the hospital.

  While she waited to be seen by a doctor, Addison picked up her cell phone.

  She was scared, and she didn’t want to go through this alone.

  She needed Kellen.

  * * *

  “How are you and the baby?” he asked after rushing into her hospital room. Kellen left the fundraiser as soon as he received Addison’s call and heard the panic in her voice. He hadn’t prayed since Dreyden’s death until after he hung up the phone with her.

  Addison’s fingers shook a little as she stared into Kellen’s eyes. “I have never been so scared in my life.” She reached for his hand. “I really thought I was losing the baby.”

  Kellen embraced her. “But the doctor said that everything was fine, right?”

  “I never knew just how much I wanted our child until I started spotting.” Addison glanced up at him, her eyes filled with unshed tears. “I already love this baby so much.”

  “What did the doctor say?”

  “He told me that everything looks good and the baby’s heartbeat is strong. They’re going to keep me overnight, though.”

  Kellen covered her hand with his and squeezed. “I was really scared when you called me,” he said softly.

  “I’m so sorry for the things I said to you when you found out.”


  “Look at me, Addison,” he commanded, when she dropped her eyes.

  She met his gaze and was caught, unable to look away.

  “You don’t have to apologize for anything. I really need you to hear me. I’m not going anywhere,” he told her. “I am staying right here with you and our baby.”

  She wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. “Thank you for coming.”

  “I’m glad you called me,” Kellen responded. His arms stiffened around her, his fingers digging into her spine as he pulled her closer, tighter. As if he could wrap himself around her as a shield, keeping her safe.

  Protected.

  “You’re safe with me,” he vowed.

  Addison never wanted to be anywhere else.

  Realizing she’d plummeted into dangerous thinking, Addison drew in a little more of his calm, got her thoughts and her breathing under control then slowly pulled back. “I’m sorry for crying all over you like that,” she said, wrinkling her nose in embarrassment. “I don’t usually break down like that.”

  “It’s fine,” Kellen told her. “No one can be strong all of the time, sweetheart. We’re just not made that way.”

  “I really hated interrupting your fundraiser.”

  “I was bored,” he commented with a chuckle. “I didn’t mind leaving. Addison, I want you to know that I promise to provide for you and our baby. I promise that I won’t be the one to hurt you.”

  Her eyes filled with shimmering, unshed tears at his words. Kellen meant them. That, she didn’t doubt.

  And for her they were more romantic than any flowery vows from a book could ever be. “I believe you,” she murmured.

  “My mother wanted to come with me, but I promised to call her with an update. In fact, I need to call her now.” Kellen pulled out his cell phone.

  “Mom says hello,” he said when he ended the call a short time later.

  “Hello back,” she murmured with a smile.

  “My parents are excited about our baby.”

  Addison started to cry again.

  Kellen folded his arms around her, pulling her close to his chest. She remained locked in on herself, arms banded around the pillow. He tucked her head beneath his chin and waited her out. After what felt like a long time, her body softened and her head rested more heavily on his shoulder.

  “I’m so tired,” she said, and he knew she was talking about more than physical tiredness.

  “You’ll be okay, Addison. The baby is fine. Everything is going to be okay.”

  Her breathing evened out.

  After a few more minutes she stirred in his arms, pushing away from his chest. She glanced at his face briefly before grabbing more tissues.

  The glimpse was enough for him to see she was embarrassed now that the crisis had passed.

  “I apologize for my meltdown.”

  “You don’t have to apologize, sweetheart.”

  “Yeah, I do. I’m supposed to be a strong, independent woman. I’m supposed to be able to handle anything.” Her voice sounded husky and thick.

  “So you’re saying that you aren’t supposed to feel anything or be afraid? That’s crap, Addison.”

  “I don’t know,” she responded. “Sometimes it doesn’t feel like I can. Sometimes it feels as though if I stop, that’ll be it. I’ll be locked in one place—never getting better, never moving forward. That’s not what I want for my life. I’ve worked so hard to be as good as or better than my male counterparts.”

  “Addison, you’re really overthinking this too much. You’re good at your job, so just relax.”

  “Being a woman in this industry is challenging enough, but when one aspires to get into senior management—it’s not easy.”

  “I don’t want you thinking about this right now.” He kissed away the beginnings of what he assumed was her protest. “Tell me, are we having a girl or a boy?”

  “I don’t know,” she responded with a smile. “The doctor ordered a sonogram, but I think it’s much too soon to know the sex.”

  “I’m hoping for a little girl,” he told her.

  Addison broke into a grin. “Me, too.”

  Their conversation came to a halt when a nurse entered the room to check the fetal monitor.

  “I need to go to the bathroom,” she announced when they were alone again in the room.

  Kellen was instantly by her side as she swung her legs off the bed. “Let me help you.”

  “Just pull that wheelchair over here. I’ll be right back,” Addison said as she pulled herself out of the bed and into the wheelchair. The seat of the chair felt particularly cold against her bottom as she reached down and grabbed her robe from the edge of the bed, and then wheeled herself into the bathroom.

  Once there she freshened up, noting her reflection in the mirror that hung on the wall over the sink. I look so pale.

  Kellen was about to knock when she opened the door.

  “I was getting worried.”

  “I’m fine.”

  He rolled the wheelchair over to the bed and assisted her back in it.

  Kellen looked at her and found her staring at him, a smile on her face. “What?”

  “You never cease to amaze me,” she murmured. “You are very protective of those you care about.”

  He nodded. “A family is stronger together.”

  Addison reached over and took his hand in her own. “You really are a very special man.”

  Grinning, Kellen replied, “I’ve been trying to tell you that from the first day we met.”

  She laughed.

  He kissed her hand. “You’re very special to me, too.”

  Addison yawned.

  “Why don’t you try and get some sleep, sweetheart?”

  “You’re not leaving, are you?”

  Kellen shook his head. “I’ll be right here unless they kick me out of here.”

  “I don’t want you to leave,” she said.

  He knew it was not easy for Addison to ask him to stay. Kellen could tell that she hated feeling what she considered weak and needy.

  “I’ll be here,” he promised.

  Kellen had no intention of leaving that hospital, even if it meant he had to sleep in the waiting area. He wanted to stay close by in case Addison wanted or needed him.

  * * *

  The next day, Addison was released from the hospital shortly after twelve noon.

  “I’m so ready to get out of here,” she murmured. “I have never liked hospitals or the way that they smell. I spent a lot of time in them when my mother was sick.”

  “You know that the doctor placed you on bed rest for the next couple of days,” Kellen stated. “I mean to honor his request, even if I have to tie you down.”

  She nodded. “You won’t get an argument from me. I’m going to do exactly as he instructed. I won’t risk anything happening to my baby and I certainly don’t want to end up back in a hospital room.”

  “He doesn’t want you to leave town until after your follow-up with him in three days.”

  “I know, and I’m fine with it. I would rather make sure everything is fine with the baby before I leave, as well.”

  A nurse entered the room with a wheelchair.

  The only time Kellen left her side was to pull the car up to the entrance. He helped Addison inside and then drove to the beach house.

  He insisted on carrying her into the house.

  She was nearly weightless in his arms and so achingly fragile. “You are going straight to bed,” Kellen told her. “I’m going to get us something to eat and while I’m gone I don’t want you getting out of bed.”

  She nodded. “Can you stay with me for a little bit? I really missed you.”

  “If this is what you want,” Kellen res
ponded with a tender smile. “I missed you, too, but I know that you wanted time alone.”

  “All I did was think about how much I wanted to see your handsome face again. You were right all along. I really care about you, Kellen.”

  “You already know that I’m crazy about you,” he responded. “I was so worried when I got your call last night.” Kellen reached over and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “I’m going to take care of you until you give birth to our child.”

  She gave him a sidelong glance. “What about afterward?”

  “Hmm...”

  Addison tossed a small, square pillow at him.

  Kellen made sure Addison was settled in bed and sleeping before he left the house in search of a grocery store. He found one less than a mile away.

  When he returned to the beach house, he found her still asleep. Kellen decided to have lunch ready by the time she awakened.

  He walked back to the bedroom to check on her. His breath caught in his throat. She was so beautiful, and she looked peaceful lying there.

  Addison stirred slightly.

  Kellen walked back to the kitchen.

  Twenty minutes later he heard her when she called out for him.

  “Hey, beautiful...”

  She sat up in bed, plumping pillows behind her. “How long was I asleep?”

  “Almost two hours.” He sat a cup on the granite-top nightstand. “It’s herbal tea. No caffeine.”

  Picking up the lovely ivory cup scattered with blue forget-me-nots, she smiled and replied, “Thank you.”

  Kellen had prepared a tray of sandwiches, as well—tiny, slightly ragged squares of white bread with the crusts removed.

  Peanut butter and honey.

  A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.

  “I remembered you telling me that whenever you weren’t feeling well, your mom made you these.”

  “This is so sweet of you, Kellen.”

  He breathed a sigh of relief that she was pleased. Making her happy was at the forefront of his mind.

  Chapter 20

  Addison picked up a piece of sandwich, chewed and swallowed. The familiar tastes from her childhood opened a floodgate of memories.