Everlost (The Night Watchmen Series Book 3)

by Candace Knoebel

  “What about the wolves?” Gavin asks, sounding somewhat off-put. “I thought we were training with them too.”

  “You will be. Later today. Now, only a couple of the rebels are freshly graduated from the Academy. The rest are up to par with Elite training, so just keep it light and easy. The point of this is really just to get to know one another. Got it?”

  I can’t help but think that he’s avoiding conversation. He isn’t inviting it for the very same reason Jaxen told us to shut up. Because he wants to be alone in his decision.

  He wants to be free.

  He’s looking between Jaxen, Gavin, Jezi, and Cassie, his gaze just as piercing as it’s always been. He’s a fighter. A leader.

  “We got it,” Gavin says with notes of sadness in his tone.

  The general doesn’t pay any mind to them.

  “And what about us?” Weldon asks, waving his thumb between the two of us.

  “You’re coming with me.”

  He leaves no room for questioning. No room for rebuttal. He just turns on his heel and starts to walk away, leaving that as the final verdict.

  Jaxen takes one look over my shoulder to where the general is heading, over to where his mother and newfound sister are training, and curses under his breath. “He’s going to leave us out? Just like that?” He quickly spins around. “Gav.”

  One word, delivered calmly and expertly controlled, and Gavin already knows what Jaxen’s asking.

  “Go. I’ve got this.” Gavin takes Cassie by the hand, ignoring her questioning look, and heads over to the members of the Rebellion.

  “Come with us,” Jaxen says to Jezi, who looks caught between following Cassie and staying with Jaxen.

  Weldon puts his hand up to his lips and snickers. “Looks like Sterling found his meal after all, because he’s surely going to kill you for going against him.”

  “I don’t care,” Jaxen says, taking my hand in his. “This is my home. My family sacrificing everything.” He pulls me forward, not leaving any room for Weldon to say anything else.

  The moment we’re in step with Sterling, he starts speaking again, never once looking in our direction. “How did I know you’d be joining us, Gramm junior?”

  “I’m not backing down. Not about this. I want to know what you have in store for Faye. Especially when it comes to my mother.”

  Sterling makes a sound deep in his throat. Nods once. “Okay.”

  Jaxen’s mouth opens like he’s ready to protest, but then he shuts it. Absorbs what Sterling has said. “Okay?” he repeats questioningly.

  “Did I stutter?” Sterling says sternly.

  A flash of anger that quickly fades with a blink. “No, sir,” he says steadily, calmly, “I just—”

  “You just what? Thought I’d protest? Enforce what I said?” He stops. Turns so quickly and unexpectedly that Jaxen almost bumps into him. “We don’t have time to waste with arguing. If you want to be stubborn and do things your own way, so be it. I will not waste effort trying to sway thick heads. Now,” he says, turning his attention to Weldon and me, “the reason I’ve asked you to train with the wolves is simple. Because of your curious ailments.”

  “My half-demon side and her half-everything side?” Weldon interjects with a glowing smirk.

  “Yes,” the general says plainly. “Because of this, the leaders and I thought that you and Faye would be the best candidates to train with the wolves first. Test the waters out before we throw everyone else in. You know what it’s like to work with someone you aren’t technically tied to by the affinity bond. You also know how to use your special qualities using Primeval techniques. We feel that they will relate best with you. They’ll connect most to you. You’re the fuse between them,” he says, looking over his shoulder at the members of the Rebellion, “and… and us.”

  He’s looking ahead. Looking at the Primevals who were robbed of choice. Robbed of their futures. Changed into something we were brought up resenting. And now he’s one of them.

  I didn’t think it was possible to feel this much remorse and still be able to function. Jaxen squeezes my hand as Weldon slaps Sterling on the back and, for a second, I’m sure Sterling is going to rip his head off. But he doesn’t. He just looks at Weldon, and they exchange something in their glances. An understanding. A sense of brotherhood.

  Sterling takes in a deep breath, and it almost sounds like he’s breathing for the first time. Like he’s accepting all that has come with what has happened, and he’s existing in this world rather than just being in it.

  “Go,” he says, looking at Weldon, and then back over his shoulder at Jaxen, Jezi, and me. “Go train with them. I’ll be watching over all of it.”

  He turns at that and walks away from us, meeting up with his wife, who was waiting next to the small shed. She puts her arm around his waist the moment he approaches and leans into him, whispering something in his ear that has him nodding in response. Watching them fills me with so much hope and so much pain. It’s nice to see that love can exist outside of tragedy, but seeing tragedy happen to such good people hurts.

  “Hello, Faye. Weldon,” Evangeline says, nodding at us both.

  “Good morning,” I reply, forcing myself to look away from the general.

  She turns to Jaxen. “Son.”

  He nods hello.

  She’s looking at Jezi now. “It’s Jezibelle, isn’t it?”

  “Yes, ma’am,” Jezi says, almost awkwardly. I didn’t think about it before, but she must be just as nervous as I am. Just as unsure about where she stands in all this, and how she should feel about it.

  The line between loyalty and justice is always blurred when emotions are involved.

  “I don’t know if General Sterling told you or not, but Ava and I have decided that we should train with those more like us first, before we mix in with the others. This way, we can establish some form of connection, while showing the others that we are harmless.”

  “That sounds like a good idea,” I say.

  Jaxen’s staring at her with forced strength. Pretending like he isn’t absorbing every word she says. Like it doesn’t affect him. But I see the fragility in his gaze. See how he hangs from her words, searching for something inside them that he’s not even sure about.

  She smiles lightly at me and continues. “But before we start, I wanted to tell you a few things about how we function. Things you may or may not already know. I know the training you’ve received at the Academy, and in Ethryeal City, has been selective to what the Priesthood has wanted you to know.”

  “That’s an understatement,” Weldon mutters.

  Evangeline smiles patiently at him. “In wolf form,” she continues, “whether you’re natural born or bitten, words are non-existent. We communicate by an emotional link we all share within our pack, similar to what you experience in an affinity bond. We send what we sense and feel based on what we see and smell between one another. The only difference is that we don’t need each other to function—only the alpha.”

  “And what about your powers?” Weldon asks, widening his stance and crossing his arms. “Did they cease with the end of the affinity bond like every other Primeval? Or are you like me?”

  “Like you?” Evangeline asks, brows dipped in curiosity. Her eyes shift over all of us.

  “Because of the power that comes with being part demon, I’ve been able to keep my Hunter abilities, despite my partner being held captive in the Underground,” Weldon delivers bluntly.

  Both Jaxen and Evangeline wince at the word, and I wish I didn’t notice. I wish I didn’t automatically associate this with her husband. Or with the fact that it’s a parent Jaxen will never see again. But most of all, I wish it didn’t make my parents’ faces appear in my head.

  I miss them so much I ache. I ache so bad that I’m sure I’ll never be whole again.

  And Weldon, he’s completely numb to his own misgivings. Either that, or he’s just that bold in pulling out the pain inside our hearts and exposing it without
even blinking… just like his brother.

  “To an extent, yes,” she says, recovering quickly with great fortitude. “As the alpha, I have retained most of my witchcraft. Some of the others, like Lukah, Arianna, and Damien can tap into their abilities from time to time. I think with more practice, they could easily call on it, but with our way of life, it’s hard to make time for that form of training when it’s the least of our worries.”

  “Care to share?” Weldon asks, tilting his head to the side.

  She looks at him for a moment, studying him like she doesn’t quite understand what he’s asked her. Or maybe she wasn’t expecting to be asked, so he’s caught her off-guard. “Pack rivals. Prejudices. Things of that nature. It’s kept us on the run. Here, at this manor, has been the only place where we have found sanctuary.” She steals a quick glance at Jaxen, who hasn’t moved since she started speaking, and then looks back at Weldon.

  “Are you ready to begin? The others are anxious for the morning run,” Ava asks as she makes her way to Evangeline’s side. She looks like an Ethiopian Goddess. Long, wavy, dark hair. Thin, dark eyebrows. A deep, striking gaze. She’s tall and slender, wearing elegance in her effortless movements.

  “Ava,” Evangeline says, turning to her with a warm, bright smile. She looks back at us, one hand on Ava’s shoulder and the other out in introduction. “Ava, this is Faye and Weldon, and my son and his partner, Jezi.”

  “It’s nice to formally meet you,” her deep, sultry voice says.

  “Ava is my beta,” Evangeline explains. “Every decision I make, I make with the help of her advice. She’s been with me from day one, drifting down the same rivers of regret that I do.”

  They smile at each other with such camaraderie.

  A couple of the wolves have shifted and are prancing back and forth at the forest’s edge.

  “I suppose we shouldn’t waste another minute chitchatting. My pack is growing restless,” Evangeline says, looking back at Weldon, Jaxen, Jezi, and me with a refreshed smile. “Let’s get to work.”

  IT’S SO FRESH OUT HERE.

  There’s a healthy scent to the air, like the earthy smell that comes just before rain arrives. Or like the soft, crisp scent the leaves create when a breeze whisks her fingers through the limbs of the trees. Hands have yet to touch this small slice of heaven. They’ve yet to destroy the beauty hidden behind the canopy of the forest.

  Evangeline has guided us away from the house, deep into the forest out back, and I’m reminded of the day when Jaxen sent me into the enchanted forest behind the Academy as a way to test me. The forest has a familiar feeling to it. Dark. Unsettlingly quiet, filled with so many undiscovered secrets.

  “We don’t train in the traditional sense that you’re accustomed to,” Evangeline says from atop a large boulder on the incline in front of us. “We, as wolves, test our limits and keep up our stamina by hunting and fighting. We use our skills to track prey, both food and Primeval alike. We’ve been helping our brethren from the start of our pack. When a Primeval is in need, and we’re close and aware, we do what we can for them.”

  “How have we not heard of this?” Jaxen asks, looking up at her.

  “Because the Coven doesn’t want you to hear of it,” Ava says from beside the boulder.

  “And because those we save are too scared to speak up about what they see and know,” the man named Lukah says with enough bitterness to slice through us all.

  “It’s not their fault, Lukah,” Harper says, fiddling with her hands in front of her. Her voice is delicate, muted, almost as if she didn’t really want to be heard.

  He looks down at her, his wolfish features softening only when he addresses her. “We all have choices, Harp. They make theirs when they choose to accept our help, and then when they choose not to thank us for it.”

  “We don’t help them for the thanks we could receive,” Evangeline says, firmly but gently.

  Lukah looks up at her, his long, blond hair falling past his shoulders and down his back. “Still. A simple thank you would be nice every now and then.”

  “Yeah,” the girl with teal eyes and stark freckles says across from him. I think she’s Arianna, but with all the new faces and names, I’m not sure. “Lukah’s right. We keep offering our help and get nothing out of it. Something’s gotta give.”

  “Arianna, you know better,” Ava says sharply.

  Arianna flinches back and looks away.

  “Listen up, everyone. We didn’t invite these four to follow us so we could gripe about our problems,” Evangeline says, redirecting the conversation back to where she wants it to go like any good leader would do. “We brought them here because, like us, they are unique. Weldon is half-demon. He, like some of you, can tap into his former abilities as a Hunter. And Faye, well, she is an entity unto her own. She was born unbound to anyone.”

  “I thought she was linked to your son and his affinity partner,” the dark-skinned boy says. I rack my brain, trying to remember what he said his name was during the introductions, but all I can remember is the fallout between Chett, Lukah, and Harper.

  And finding out about little Chrissa.

  “She is,” Evangeline says. “Care to explain for us, Faye?” she asks, opening the floor to me.

  Eight pairs of eyes turn in my direction. Peel me apart, layer by layer, trying to decipher just who I am.

  Even though my tongue feels like it’s been hung out to dry, I force myself to swallow. They’re people, just like me. Just like the others I’ve stood up to. So I lick my lips, pulling in a deep breath, and say, “I’m only linked to Jaxen and Jezi because I have the power to choose who I want to be linked to. And, as of right now, I can link myself to multiple people. I can also pull energy from others, to the point of killing them, and also give the same amount of energy out if someone I trust is in need of it.” I exhale, feeling a small weight lift from having to explain who I am, and add, “That about sums me up.”

  Weldon chuckles, stealing the glances of everyone around us. “She’s so cute when she’s being modest, don’t you agree?” he says coyly. “Really, mouse, it’s one of your predictably cute qualities that I look forward to. It’s refreshing.”

  Jaxen shakes his head.

  Everyone is staring at the both of us. Watching in fascination. Too amused to look away.

  I imagine myself punching him in the arm. Or maybe the mouth.

  “As refreshing as your worn-out sense of humor,” I say, forcing a smirk onto my lips.

  Jezi doesn’t waste the opportunity to laugh.

  Weldon’s smile threatens to swallow his face whole when he sees my intent reflecting in my eyes. I wish it would. He looks away from me, drinking up my discomfort as if it were a glass of his finest blood collection, and directs his attention back onto the wolves. “Don’t let her modest example fool you. She’s a badass, though she doesn’t like admitting this to anyone, let alone herself. I’ve watched her take out a horde of men with the blink of her eye. She’s stood up to Clara and to Bael. She, like you, has offered aid to so many who were undeserving. She’s set aside her own misfortunes to focus on the grander picture, and not once has she stopped and asked for something else. For an out, out of this shithole of a life.”

  He turns, looking at me now with a deep respect I’ve yet to see in him before. “She’s the bravest woman I’ve ever known, and she’s one hell of a friend.”

  His words kick me in my temper. My irritation quickly dissolves as he starts to laugh again, knowing that he has me right where he wants me. Baffled and embarrassed.

  “That’s all well and good, but remind me how working with them is going to help our pack?” Lukah says. “I understand that a lot has happened in the past couple of days with seeing your sons and all, but that’s not going to stop Arakyll’s junkies from tracking us down.”

  Jaxen’s body stiffens.

  “Lukah,” Ava warns with a murderous tone. “Enough.”

  He rolls his eyes from Ava onto Evangeline, and stare
s up at her, waiting for an answer.

  “Arakyll’s junkies?” Weldon repeats, taking a step forward. “Call it intuition, or just good old-fashioned listening skills, but did you happen to piss off the wolves from Arakyll’s former pack? You know, before you de-cocked him? Or are you some kind of drug dealer?”

  “Weldon,” Jaxen says sternly, glaring at him.

  “Dealer?” Ava asks, her hand held up in offense. “How dare you—”

  Evangeline jumps down from the boulder and moves in between us with Chrissa on her heels. “I think it’s time we start the hunt, don’t you?” Evangeline says quickly, raising her brows at Ava in expectation.

  It takes Ava a moment, but she finally relents, offering another cold glare in Weldon’s direction.

  “Damien, Lukah, you both go on ahead and scout out the trail,” Evangeline says as diplomatically as she can. “Arianna and Ava, you follow suit. Harper will stay behind with Chrissa.”

  “What?” Chrissa asks heatedly as she moves from behind her mother’s legs. Her wild hair is pulled back in a tight ponytail with ringlets falling around her face. “That’s not fair! I want to run with my brother!”

  Jaxen smiles knowingly at her as she tries to make valid points on why she should be allowed to come, and I can’t help but think about Jaxen earlier when Sterling had intended for only Weldon and me to train with the wolves. The way she wears her emotions in her gaze. The way she carries her disappointment in her shoulders. And how he responds with just as much heated passion when something doesn’t sit well with him.

  It seems they have more than just drawing in common.

  Evangeline holds her palm up, silencing Chrissa with just a brief glow in her eyes. “This is not up for debate, Chrissa. You’re only twelve and nowhere near ready to run with us. Just because our situation has changed, doesn’t mean the rules have. Now, scoot. Follow Harper back to the house.”

  “This is so unfair!” Chrissa says with a scowl. She shifts into a full-blown wolf and takes off, leaving Harper to run after her.