The Road To Price

by Justine Elvira

  *****

  My mood is somber throughout dinner. I can’t shake all the emotions that are running through my body. I want to scream, I want to cry, I want to go back to my room and just lay in the dark until I fall asleep. Mostly, I want anything that will help me numb the pain I am feeling.

  This is exactly why I never wanted him, or anyone else, to know about Miles. I am fine when I can bury all thoughts of him. It is almost like he never existed, like it was a dream. It's when someone brings him up that I completely break down.

  I have barely touched any of my food and Sebastian notices. He doesn’t say anything; in fact, he's silent most of the meal. The only time he speaks is when Rachel enters the room to check on our courses.

  She has just brought out dessert when Sebastian suddenly tosses his napkin on his plate. I hear the screeching of the legs of his chair as he pulls it out and stands up abruptly.

  “Rachel, can you have this sent up to my room? Mia and I are going to head up to bed.” His voice sounds stern. It's a voice that's not to be questioned. Rachel notices this, too, because she nods shyly before leaving the room.

  “Come with me,” Sebastian says as he reaches out for me from across the table.

  I stand up from my chair and place my napkin down. I have no desire to go with him, but his mood tells me this isn’t a time to argue.

  I walk over to meet him and he takes my hand in his. We walk to his room in silence. I’m not sure if he is going to tell me about his wife now, yell at me, or ask for sex. It really could go any way.

  I step into his bedroom after him and he closes the doors, locking them this time. Sebastian starts to remove his clothing and I follow his lead.

  I guess we are having sex.

  Standing in his boxers, me in my bra and panties, Sebastian does something unexpected. He moves over to his bed and pulls back his bedding. He sits down with his back against the headboard, legs open, and calls me over to sit in between them.

  Searching for some kind of comfort, I eagerly go to him and sit between his legs, my back to his front.

  Sebastian leans over to grab his comforter and pulls it until it is draped over our bodies. Then he wraps his arms around my stomach, my head immediately falls back on his chest. I feel safe. Being in his arms gives me so much comfort and peace. It is something I have never felt before.

  We lie like this for what feels like hours, neither of us saying a word. We don’t address what happened earlier, we don’t talk about his marriage, and we don’t have sex.

  Every couple minutes Sebastian shows me some little form of affection. He squeezes me a little tighter, or runs the tips of his fingers up and down my arms, or leaves lingering kisses on the back of my head.

  The affection he is showing me makes me want to cry. I never knew a man could be so tender… thoughtful… loving. I have never seen that before.

  I'm slowly starting to drift off to sleep. The rising and falling of his chest is the most comforting thing in the world and I know when I fall asleep tonight, I will be safe.