Hope Blooms

by Jamie Pope

  She was going to have to sleep away from him. Be away from him. It was for the best. She knew that deep down inside. She stormed in on his quiet life, disrupting everything, even though she didn’t mean to. But she had grown accustomed to sleeping beside his hard body every night. To smelling his smell, to feeling his rough facial hair on her skin every morning. Even when they were together, she never got to sleep with him often, because they had loved in secret.

  “This room is beautiful, Wylie. Thank you for doing this for me.”

  “It was the excuse I needed to start fixing up the house.”

  “I can help you with that, if you want. I would like to help you out more. While I’m still here.”

  He stiffened for the briefest of moments before he came over and kissed her forehead. “I would like that.” He touched her face. “And I really do like your haircut. Good night, Cass.”

  * * *

  Wylie lay in bed that night, feeling exhausted, but sleep wouldn’t come to him. He felt like he had lived a week in that day. It was Cassandra’s fault. She was like a war zone, throwing little bombs in his way. He wasn’t sure if he knew how to dodge the explosions anymore.

  And that damn haircut. She blew him to pieces. Over dinner, sitting on the porch, being with her in that room, he had a hard time concentrating. He kept looking at her. He kept wanting to kiss the curve of her neck and those soft shoulders. He wanted to slip his hands beneath her cute little dress and feel her thighs. All day he had been hyper-aware of her. All day he had trouble controlling himself. He thought having her sleep away from him, all the way down the hallway, would be better. It would help him restore his sanity, but it only made things worse. He missed the way her body tucked into his. He missed the soft sound of her breathing. He missed her.

  He’d been alone for so many years. The Marines took him away a lot of the time, and he was alone because no woman seemed worth more than a few nights. Now that Cass was back in his life, it got him thinking about what he wanted for his future.

  Was he happy?

  Did he have a good life?

  He heard soft footsteps in the hallway. He thought they would stop, that he would hear the bathroom door shut, but he didn’t. His bedroom door opened and Cass was there, in a new nightgown, which was tiny in comparison to the old ones he was used to seeing her in. He was already hard, had been for hours. It was why he left her to go to bed so early, but he grew even harder when she walked in.

  She tried to creep toward the bed, but then she saw that he was awake and staring at her. She crossed her arms across her chest, taking on a defiant posture. “I don’t want to sleep alone. I know you need your—”

  “Okay,” he said, cutting her off. “Come here.”

  She slipped in bed beside him and this time he didn’t even go through the pretense of trying to stay away from her. He gathered her close, her head settling on his chest, his hand sliding beneath her nightgown to cup her behind. “I see you got new underwear today too. I like them.”

  She grinned up at him and it was like she threw another bomb at him, like he stepped in a land mine. He hadn’t seen her smile once since she’d arrived. Her happiness was only a memory to him, but there it was in his face and it blew him away.

  “Thank you for noticing.”

  He knew they couldn’t go on like this anymore. He had to send her away if he wanted his old life back, the peaceful, quiet one where nothing shook him.

  “Thank you, Wylie,” she said as she stroked her hand up his arm.

  “For what, Cass?”

  “For being you.”

  He looked down at her sleepy face and the way she just fit into his arm and realized he didn’t want his old life back. Cass was there for a reason and he needed her to stay.

  * * *

  Cass waited outside Mansi’s house a few days later. She was waiting for Teo. At first she didn’t want to admit it to herself, but that’s why she was sitting on the porch. It was not for fresh air or a change of scenery. She had spent every day after school with him, helping him with his homework, exploring his neighborhood with him. He was even teaching her how to play video games. Somehow, when she wasn’t looking, that five-year-old had become her friend. And that made her think about what Wylie had told her, about how he used to spend most of his time with his grandmother while his father worked. Teo was just like him in that way, but he didn’t have to be. He was already too grownup for a little kid

  Three P.M. came and went, but the vehicle that pulled up in front of the house was not a school bus. It was Nova’s red Jeep. Today it had doors on it and in the passenger side was Teo. The little boy jumped out, flung his book bag on the porch floor and squeezed in next to her in the oversized Adirondack chair, resting his head on her arm.

  “Hey, Miss Cass,” he said, greeting her.

  “Hey, Mr. Teo.” She touched the boy’s messy curls. “How was work today?”

  “I don’t got a job, Miss Cass.” He frowned at her in confusion. “I went to school.”

  Cass shrugged. “School is work too. You just don’t get paid for it.”

  “You could give me money every day that I went to school.”

  “If I gave you money, then you would have to wear a little three-piece suit.” She took his face in her hands and tilted his head as she studied him. “I think you would look pretty freaking cute in a suit. Maybe with a red tie. Red ties mean power. Did you know that? If you walked into kindergarten wearing a three-piece suit and red tie, you’d own the place.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I don’t know. I’m crazy.” She looked toward Nova’s Jeep to see that she hadn’t gotten out yet.

  “She’s on the phone,” he said grumpily. “It rang as soon as we got in the car. She’s going to work late again tonight. Or maybe she has a date. She’s always gone.”

  “Oh.” Cass didn’t know what to say to that. She liked Nova. Cassandra knew Nova loved her son, but they didn’t seem to connect. Nova was always dashing off to do her own thing. But none of her family said anything about it. Not Mansi. Not Wylie. They all seemed to think Teo was better off without her. “You never told me how your day was.”

  “We have a class pet now. A guinea pig. His name is Mr. Peepers. It was my day to feed him. One person gets to take him home every weekend. I asked Mansi if we could keep him next week.”

  “What did she say?”

  “She told me people eat guinea pigs in Peru.”

  Cass shut her eyes briefly. “I can’t believe she told you that.”

  “It’s true. She saw it on TV.”

  “I’m sure it’s true. I just wish she hadn’t told you that. Did you ask your mother if you could bring it home?”

  “They don’t allow pets in the apartment. It says so in our lease.”

  “How do you know what your lease says?”

  “Mommy tells me. She says just in case I start getting funny ideas about asking for a dog.”

  “You could bring Mr. Peepers to our house—I mean your uncle’s house one weekend.” She caught her mistake. It was a dangerous one. She was a guest in Wylie’s home, a temporary visitor to this place. She had to keep reminding herself of that. Wylie was still the guy who walked out on her. He was still the man who broke her heart. She tried not to think about it. She was here to heal, to feel again, to live again.

  She was going to focus on that.

  “I don’t know. We have to ask Uncle Wylie.”

  “He’ll say yes. Maybe we could have a sleepover. We could come get you from school.”

  “You want me to stay with you?”

  “Yeah. And while you’re with us, you can help me scrub the toilet and kitchen floor.”

  Teo grinned at her. “You’re funny.”

  “That’s what you think.” She wrapped her arm around him, bringing him closer. “Things will be cleaned, my friend. You just better hope I don’t use your toothbrush.”

  They both looked up as they heard Nova’s door sla
m. Overlarge sunglasses shielded her eyes. She was dressed in all black. The hairstylist uniform.

  “Don’t you look fancy today, Ms. Nova.”

  Nova looked at them for a long moment, her eyes pausing on Teo’s face before she spoke. “I’ve got another wedding to do tonight. In Edgartown,” she said distractedly. “A senator’s daughter this time, so I’ve got to be on my best behavior. The tip from this gig alone could pay the rent for the next two months.”

  “You coming home late?” Teo asked, sounding more like a father than a five-year-old.

  “About midnight.” She nodded. “Wedding season is slowing down. It’s going to be about three more weeks of this.”

  “I never sleep at home anymore.”

  She nodded again. “I know,” she said softly. “I’ve been working.”

  “Miss Cass said I could sleep at Uncle Wylie’s next weekend.”

  “You can, if she says so.”

  “She’s going to let me bring the guinea pig.”

  “That’s nice, baby.” Nova looked helpless for a moment. Like she was unsure what to do with or say to her son; Cass felt sorry for her. The tension between Nova and her son was palpable.

  “I made you a peanut butter and marshmallow sandwich,” Cass told him. “It’s sitting on the table.”

  “I like those,” Teo said. “Thank you.” He got up, tossing one last look at his mother before going inside.

  Nova took a step forward as if she was going to go after him, but she stopped herself. Cass wished Nova hadn’t stopped. Cass wished the woman had hugged her boy.

  It’s what she would have done. Her baby would have been nine months old now if he had lived. She tried not to think about that too; but seeing Teo, being around him, made her wonder what her child would have been like. It made her wish she could go back and change things. It made her wish she could at least have seen what he looked like.

  “This is the first time in my life that I’ve ever been good at something,” Nova said, breaking Cass from her thoughts. “I went to school and finished. I’ve got a good job. I’m finally making enough money to support us. Without his deadbeat, shithead father. He’s safe here. I never had that growing up. We were dirt poor. We lived in cars and slept on couches when we couldn’t afford a motel. My mother went through men like tissues. My life was shit growing up. I don’t want him to have a shitty life. I take that money from my brother and put it in a college fund so he’ll have something. I’m doing everything I can.”

  “You don’t have to explain that to me, Nova. I’m not judging you.”

  “I know,” she said, still looking through the door that her son disappeared through. “I’m judging myself.”

  * * *

  When Wylie pulled up to Mansi’s house that afternoon, the first thing he heard was Cass screaming. The hairs on the back of his neck went up in the air; he was out of his truck before he realized she wasn’t screaming out of fear or hurt.

  “Teo, quit it! You’re shaking like a wet dog.”

  “Ruff. Ruff!”

  Wylie walked around to the back of the house to see Teo running around in his underwear, soap suds covering him from head to toe. Cass was chasing after him with the sprinklers.

  “Oh, you’re barking now?” Cass laughed. “What kind of dog are you, a poodle?”

  “A ‘poodle’?” Teo stopped, crossing his arms over his small chest. “I’m a bulldog!”

  “Nah, you’re too hyper. I’d like to think of you as more like a rat terrier.”

  “A ‘rat terrier’?” He thought about it for a moment. “People are afraid of rats. I’m cool with that.”

  “Good. Now get over here so I can throw this big bucket of water at you.”

  Wylie almost didn’t want to intrude. Cass was laughing. Her face was lit up, and for once he saw no signs of sadness or traces of despair that had hung with her since she had come back into his life.

  And then there was Teo. He had tried to keep his nephew away from Cass at first, but he realized that maybe Teo needed something from her that he couldn’t get from anybody else.

  “What are you guys doing?” he finally said just as Cass dumped a large bucket of water on Teo’s head. They both screamed again as water splashed all over the both of them.

  “Uncle Wylie!” Teo shook like a dog again.

  “Hey! What the hell are you guys doing?”

  “Taking a shower,” Teo said as if it were obvious, water dripping down his face.

  “In the backyard?”

  “Yeah.” He nodded. “Lots of people take showers outside. We just don’t got an outside shower like them.”

  “I’ve got an outside shower at my house.”

  “You do?” Teo and Cass both asked.

  “Yes, it’s in the back, and it’s got a little stall so no one can see you prancing around the yard half naked. Get in the house and put some clothes on, boy.”

  “I was going inside anyway.” He shook one more time. “I don’t want to freeze my raisins off out here.”

  “‘Raisins’?” Wylie shook his head. He couldn’t believe the stuff that came out of the kid’s mouth half the time. “Where did you hear that?”

  “From Mansi.”

  “Of course you did. Because all grandmothers talk like that. Get inside. I don’t want you freezing any of your fruit off.”

  He turned to go, but looked back at Cass. “Can you stay for dinner, Miss Cass?”

  She nodded. “I told you I would. We’re going to use the grill to make the chicken.”

  “And you’re going to talk to Uncle Wylie about the guinea pig and the sleepover?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  He looked unsure. “You promise?”

  “Cross my heart.” She nodded. “He’ll say yes. Don’t worry.”

  Teo nodded and went inside then, leaving Wylie wondering what the two were up to. “What was that all about?”

  He didn’t look at Cass closely before, but now that Teo had left them alone, he took the chance to study her. She was soaking wet. The pair of black shorts and pretty cream-colored tank top molded to her body, showing off every sweet, soft curve she had. He could see her bra through her shirt. It was unlike the plain ones he had seen before. This one was blue and leopard printed. His blood pressure rose just from looking at her in it.

  “We’re taking him next weekend for a sleepover, along with his class pet, Mr. Peepers.”

  “Oh?” He stepped closer to her.

  “Yes.” She turned away from him, picking up the abandoned sprinklers.

  He followed her. “Are we going to talk about this, like Teo said?”

  “Nope. I want to take him and the damn guinea pig, and if you don’t like it, you can suck an egg.”

  “‘Suck an egg’?” He grabbed her elbow. “That was mean. What did I do to deserve that?”

  “Nothing.” She turned to him, grinning, the flowing sprinkler still in her hand. “I just wanted to do this.” She sprayed him, and the icy water soaked his shirt.

  She dropped the hose and took off across the yard. He was after her immediately. Her shorter legs were no match for his. Still, she was quicker than he expected, leaping over the myriad toys Teo had left in the yard, but he caught her by the back of her shorts. She turned toward him at the same moment, her feet sliding on the wet grass, causing her to knock both of them off balance. He landed on his back, with her soft, wet body on top of his.

  “Are you okay?” She tried to lift herself off him, but he had his hands locked around her waist.

  “No, I’m not okay.” He rolled them over, so he could be on top of her, so he could look into those pretty brown eyes of hers. “You are mean.”

  “I am not!” she said, gasping.

  “You’re mean, and sneaky and bad.”

  “Three things that are not true.” Her eyes grew mischievous. Her grin returned and Wylie’s heart pounded in his chest.

  “You’re also very wet.”

  “That’s because your nep
hew is a very messy bather.”

  “Well, I’m going to have to thank him, because I can see right through your shirt. And I like very much what I see.”

  “And you said you weren’t good with words.” She surprised him by lifting her mouth to his. There was a split second where he could see uncertainty in her eyes, but that disappeared in an instant and she kissed him, lightly at first. Just her lips brushing his. Since she had been here, he had only kissed her. Kissed her because he couldn’t help himself, but now she was the one doing the kissing. And the only way he could describe it was like she was sixteen again and it was her first time kissing him. He didn’t want to scare her away by kissing her back. He didn’t want her to stop, so he stayed very still and let her do what she wanted.

  “Closer,” she murmured, and she slid her hands into his hair and pulled him in even more. She deepened the kiss just a little, like she was exploring, taking the time to get to know his lips better. Then her tongue came out, slowing, lightly licking across his mouth. His erection strained against his zipper, begging to be let out. He hurt: his whole body, his arms and legs. His head and gut and heart hurt. He wanted to be with her so badly, needed to be with her. But she seemed oblivious to his pain. Or maybe she was enjoying it, because her legs fell open even more and he found himself between them. Her body grew softer; her kiss grew hotter; her tongue was sweeping all the way into his mouth. His control broke then. He grabbed her hands, pushing them over her head so that he could take control of the kiss. But she wouldn’t let him. They were equals in this kiss; both of them giving just as much, both of them taking everything the other had to give. And just as he was about to lose his mind, just as he was about to slide his hands up her body and peel away every ounce of wet clothing she had on, he remembered where they were. They were in Mansi’s backyard, in full view of anybody who happened to come by. He broke the kiss, but he couldn’t force himself away from her.

  “Damn it, Wylie,” she said breathlessly. “Damn it.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “I’m not.” She looked up at him and there was awe in her eyes. “I felt that all over. I felt that in my toes. I’ve been numb, but you make me feel.”