"It was an accident," I say, remembering how upset Nate got when I told him. "After that, we made the agreement to make sure it didn't happen again."
"Seems a little restrictive," Brad says, "but I don't want to mess up your arrangement. So what's off limits?"
"I'll tell you later," I say. "I need to go change."
Heading to the locker room, I'm annoyed once again with Nate. I've never liked that agreement and felt like he was punishing me when he made it. So I accidentally told him the ending. Big deal. It was one time and I promised to never do it again.
"Hey." I feel a hand on my shoulder, stopping me. I look back and see Tara there. "You almost ran me over."
"I did?" I sigh. "Sorry. I wasn't looking."
"You okay?" she asks.
"Yeah. It's just been a long day."
She follows me into the locker room. Her locker is right next to mine and as she opens it, I notice the inside is neatly organized with tiny hooks and hangers, little boxes, and shelf inserts.
"Wow." I peek inside. "Where'd you find all that stuff?"
"Online." She pulls a tiny hairbrush from one of the boxes. "I like things to be organized."
"You weren't like that in high school," I say, remembering how things were always falling out of her backpack, which was stuffed so full she could barely zip it.
"I know. Weird, huh? For some reason I suddenly got obsessed with organizing stuff my junior year of college." She puts the brush back and closes her locker. "You've changed a lot too since high school."
"What do you mean?" I open my locker and grab my clothes.
"Well, for one, how the hell did you get those boobs?"
I look down at my chest. "From my mom, except mine came later than hers."
"Lucky you. My mom gave me wide hips and a fat ass."
"Your ass isn't fat."
"You obviously haven't looked at it." She turns around and points to it. It's bigger than it was in high school, but not huge. "You know how hard it is to find jeans to fit this?"
"You should be happy about it. A lot of guys love a girl with a little extra back there."
She laughs. "I know. This ass gets me asked out a lot. Two guys just today."
"Really? Here at the pool?"
"Yeah. I turned them down." She leans against the locker. "So what's going on with you and Nate?"
"Nothing. Why do you ask?"
She smiles. "He wants you so bad. Back in high school, I thought for sure you guys would be married by now. Everyone did."
"Why? We didn't even date."
"But everyone knew Nate was in love with you. We weren't sure if you were in love with him. So are you?"
"No. We're just friends." I shut my locker and go around her to get a towel.
"Seriously?" She rushes over to me. "You really don't love him?"
"Not the way you're talking about."
She'd already know that if she'd noticed my attraction to Brad and saw him kiss me during CPR training. Since she didn't, it means Giada was exaggerating when she said everyone thinks there's something going on between Brad and me. She's probably the only one who noticed, which is good. I don't want anyone knowing.
"Now it makes sense," Tara says.
"What makes sense?"
"Johnny kept saying there was something going on between you and Brad. I told him he was crazy, but then when Brad kissed you during the CPR demo, I thought maybe Johnny was right. I just couldn't imagine you cheating on Nate like that."
"I'm not cheating on Nate," I blurt out.
"So you ARE dating Brad."
"No! But if I were, which I'm not, it wouldn't be cheating because Nate and I are only friends. We've never been anything more than that."
"And Nate feels the same way?"
I sigh. "No. He wants more, but I can't give him more. I don't feel that way about him."
"Meaning he's single?" she asks with a smile.
"Are you saying you want to go out with Nate?"
She shrugs. "Maybe. I always thought he was cute back in high school. Now he's all grown up and kinda hot. You wouldn't mind, would you?"
"Um, no. Go ahead. Ask him out."
"I'll think about it." She walks off. "See ya!"
Nate dating Tara? Why does that bother me? It shouldn't. He can date whoever he wants. Tara and I have never really been friends, but I don't have anything against her. I can't really see Nate with her, but what do I know? Maybe they'd be a good match.
I should encourage this. If Nate's dating someone, he won't want to spend all his time with me and then I'll be free to hang out with Brad. I can't believe I'm even thinking that. Just a few weeks ago, I was worried Brad would interfere with my time with Nate, and now I'm actually hoping that will happen. I still want to spend time with Nate, but not if he's going to be angry with me all summer. I'd much rather be with Brad.
Chapter Thirteen
Riley
"Thanks for the ride," I say to Brad as we stand outside his SUV, just in front of the trailer.
"Pick you up around six-thirty?" he asks.
"It's already six. Don't you need more time? You said you have to stop at the store. And then you'll have to go home and change and—"
"What time do you want me here?" he asks with a smile.
My heart stutters at that damn smile. "Um, whenever is fine."
"I'm kind of in a hurry to get this night started. It's not that often it's just the two of us, without Nate."
"That's true." I glance over at Dave's truck. "Sooner would be better. Looks like Dave's here so..."
"You don't want to watch him and your mom make out. Got it. I'll hurry and get back when I can. I'll text when I'm on my way." He opens his door and I watch as he gets in.
"Brad, wait!" I race over to him.
"Yeah?"
I stand next to his door, wondering why the hell I'm about to say this but unable to stop myself.
"That's not the reason," I say, gulping down a breath.
"Not sure what we're talking about," he says in that calm, easy voice of his that somehow puts my nerves at ease.
"My mom and Dave making out. That's not the reason I want you to hurry back. I mean, it's one of the reasons, but..."
"What's the other reason?"
"You." I look away, then back at him. "It's like you said. It's usually not the two of us. Alone. But I want that. I mean, I'm looking forward to it. So um, hurry back."
"Will do." He smiles and nods toward the trailer. "Go get ready. I'll be back before you know it."
He drives off, and I'm left feeling like I'm fifteen again and just found out my secret crush likes me back, all giddy, butterflies fluttering in my stomach. It's so ridiculous. I'm 22, almost 23. I shouldn't be this excited over a guy, especially one I shouldn't be dating. Even if he wasn't Nate's cousin, why would I date a guy who will be moving away in a few months? It doesn't make sense, but none of this does. Nothing the last few weeks has made any sense. Nate saying he loves me. Me falling for Brad. Brad liking me back. It's all so unexpected and confusing. Maybe that's why I find it so exciting. My life up until now has been boring and predictable, but now it's suddenly not, and I have no idea how this summer will end.
As I'm getting ready to go out, Nate calls.
"I thought we weren't talking tonight," I say when I answer.
"That was the plan, but I need to ask you something."
I hope he's not going to ask if tonight is a date. If he does, what do I say? I told Brad it wasn't, so I guess I'd tell Nate the same, even though it already feels like a date. I'm wearing a dress and I straightened my hair and put on makeup, which I wouldn't do if I was just going to the movies with Nate.
"What's the question?" I say.
"Tara just called me."
"Yeah? What about?"
"I think she just asked me out."
"And? What'd you tell her?"
"That's it? You're not surprised? This is Tara. From the pool?"
"Yeah, I k
now, but I'm not surprised. I always thought she had a crush on you back in high school."
"You never told me that. You never even talked to her in high school."
"Sure I did. We had algebra and English together. You weren't in those classes with me so you didn't see me talking to her."
"You never said anything about her. If you guys talked back then, you would've told me."
"So what'd she say? When she called you?"
"She said she wasn't doing anything tonight and asked if I wanted to meet her for dinner."
"If you're meeting her, then maybe it's not a date. Maybe she just wanted to go out and thought you might be free."
"That's the other thing. Why would she think I'd be free? She knows I spend all my time with you. Did you tell her about our fight?"
"No," I say, not wanting to tell him the truth. He'd be embarrassed if Tara—or anyone—knew he proclaimed his love to me and I turned him down. "But she did ask me if you were seeing someone."
"Why didn't you tell me that?"
"Because we're not supposed to be talking."
"When did she ask you? Today?"
"Yeah, after work, when we were in the locker room."
He sighs. "I wish you'd told me, or at least sent me a text. I wasn't prepared for this. Tara took me totally off guard. I didn't know why she was calling. She had to ask me out like three times before I finally figured out she asking me on a date."
"So what did you tell her?"
"I told her I'd call her back."
"Why? You don't want to go out with her?"
"I don't know. I've never thought about her that way. I haven't thought of ANY girl that way since—" He stops.
"Since you decided you like ME that way."
"Yeah," he mutters.
It makes me wonder when he realized he had feelings for me. When did it start? And why didn't I ever notice?
My phone dings with a text. It's from Brad, saying he's on his way over.
"Nate, what's your question? Why are you calling?"
"I don't know what to do. I wouldn't mind going out with Tara. I mean, she's definitely attractive. She's also really smart, and she's not as serious as she used to be. She's lightened up, which is good."
"So what's the issue?"
"I wanted to make sure you were okay with it."
"Why wouldn't I be?"
"I don't know. I guess I thought maybe you'd be jealous."
"Why would I be jealous? We're friends. That's it. You can date whoever you want. You never asked me before if it was okay for you to date someone."
"Because you didn't know the girls I dated in college. You know Tara, so I thought it might be weird for you."
"Not at all. I don't have a problem with you dating Tara, or anyone else we know."
"You sure? Because if it were the other way around, I wouldn't like it."
"You don't want me dating anyone, even guys you don't know. But you can't be that way. You can't be mad at me for dating."
"I know," he says with a sigh. "I'm working on it. It would help if you didn't date one of my friends. Maybe you don't think it's weird, but I do. It'd be even worse if you were with someone like Brad. Having you date my cousin?" Nate lets out a laugh. "Shit. I know it wouldn't happen, but just thinking about it pisses me off."
Why does he think it wouldn't happen? Does he think Brad's too good for me? That a future doctor can't date a trailer park girl?
"Speaking of Brad, what are you guys doing tonight? Did you decide on a movie?"
"Not yet. Maybe we'll do something else. I don't really feel like going to a movie. What about you and Tara? I think you should go out with her, even if you just go as friends. It's Saturday night. You don't want to be stuck at home on a Saturday night."
"Yeah, I guess. I'll call her back."
"Nate, I should go. Brad's on his way."
"Okay. Have a good time."
I toss my phone on the bed and race to finish my makeup. I had to borrow some from my mom because I don't have much. She left with Dave soon after I got home. She said they might spend the night at his place, which would be awesome. I wish they'd go there every night instead of being here.
There's a knock on the trailer door. Brad's here. Knowing he's just a few feet away has those butterflies in my belly flapping their wings, making me feel happy and excited in a way I've never felt before.
"Hey," I say, greeting him at the door. "Come on in. I just need to grab my purse."
"You don't need it," he says as he steps inside. "Tonight's on me."
God, he looks good. Dark jeans, black leather shoes, button-up shirt, and wearing a cologne with a crisp manly scent that makes me want to get closer. I'm guessing that's why he wore it. If so, he didn't need it. Just seeing him here, I want to get closer.
I really want to kiss him. It's all I've been able to think about, and not being able to do it makes me think about it even more.
"Riley." His eyes drink me in, firing up a heat deep inside me. "You look beautiful. I love the dress."
"Thanks." I glance down at it. It's nothing great. Just a simple black knit dress I got at a thrift store a few years ago. But it fits me well and doesn't wrinkle, so it's one of my favorite dresses.
Brad takes a step closer and offers me his hand. "Come here."
I take his hand and he draws me into him, then wraps his arm around my waist.
"Brad." I look up at him. "I...we—" I was about to remind him this isn't a date, but the words refuse to come out.
His hand cups my face and he leans down. "You're so beautiful, Riley," he says in a soft, deep voice.
His lips brush against mine, then he kisses me, and it ignites all those feelings I've been wanting to feel again since the last time he kissed me. I thought the feelings weren't real, like maybe I'd imagined it all in my head when I was thinking about it later. But I didn't imagine it. The sparks. The heat. That lingering pleasure just below my belly. It's all happening again and I don't want it to stop.
"I said I wouldn't do this," Brad whispers, almost like he's talking to himself.
"I did too," I say, tilting my head back as he kisses my neck.
"But I can't seem to stop." His lips slide up to my ear, sending a tingly pleasure down my body. "What the hell are you doing to me, Riley?"
His warm breath by my ear makes me shiver. A shiver that creates more of those wonderfully addictive tingles throughout my body.
I grab hold of his shirt as his mouth returns to mine, his kiss now hotter and deeper, making my knees feel like they're about to buckle.
"The couch," I say, pulling on him to move. But just as we start to, I hear a loud truck outside.
"What is it?" Brad says when I pull away. "Is something wrong?"
I sigh. "That's Dave's truck. My mom's home."
The door swings open and there she is, wearing a short denim skirt, tight red blouse, and red cowboy boots.
"Hey, sugar," she says, chomping on her gum. Her eyes dart to Brad, looking him up and down. She's clearly checking him out and doesn't care if he notices. She does it to all the guys I have over, which is why I usually don't invite them here.
"Well, who's this fine piece of man?" she says, stumbling over to him. She's been drinking. I should've known when I saw her chomping on gum. She thinks the minty gum will hide the liquor on her breath, but it doesn't. I still smell it on her.
"Brad Whittaker." He holds his hand out to my mom. "Nice to meet you."
"Pleasure's all mine," she says, shaking his hand. She winks at me. "You hit the jackpot with this one. Where'd you find him?"
"He's Nate's cousin. He's from Arizona. Just here for the summer. You saw him that day at the salon, remember?"
"That's right. I thought he looked familiar." She looks Brad up and down. "Nate's cousin, huh? You definitely won the lottery in the looks department. Not that Nate isn't cute. He's just—"
"Mom, what do you need? Where's Dave?"
"He's waiting in the tr
uck. I forgot my purse, so we came back to get it."
"It's right over there," I say, pointing to the kitchen table.
She ignores me, talking to Brad. "So where are you taking her?"
"We don't know yet," I say, answering for him. "Mom, you should go. Dave's waiting."
"He doesn't mind. He's on his phone." She looks at us both. "So Nate's okay with this? You two dating?"
"It's not a date," I say. "We're just going out. As friends. Mom, I told you how I've been going out with Nate and his cousin. It's just tonight Nate wanted to stay home."
"Sure looks like a date to me," she says. "Wearing a dress? Your hair like that?" She leans closer. "And is that my eyeshadow you're wearing?"
I back away. "I just borrowed it. I put it back."
"Charlene!" I hear Dave yell from outside the door. "Hurry the hell up!"
Dave usually annoys me when he's around, but this time I'm happy he's here. Maybe he can get her to leave.
My mom rolls her eyes. "The man has no patience." She goes to get her purse, then stops at the door. "Have fun you two!"
"We will. Bye, Mom."
I wait for her to leave, then look out the window and watch as they drive off.
"They're gone," I say, turning back to Brad. "So that's my mom."
"She's very friendly," he says with a smile.
"Sorry she checked you out like that. She sees a hot guy and forgets it's not appropriate to stare. And when she's drunk, it's even worse. You're lucky she didn't put her hands all over you."
"I wouldn't have let her." He walks up to me and pulls me into his arms. "Only her daughter gets to do that."
I smile. "You're giving me permission to touch you?"
He smiles back. "Anywhere you want."
"How about here?" I reach up and kiss him.
He pulls me closer and kisses me back, sparking an insatiable need for more. I keep telling myself to stop before going too far with him, but one kiss is all it takes to change my mind. There's just something about him. Something I've never felt before. If I'd felt this way with Nate, we would've dated a long time ago. But I never felt like this with Nate. Not even close.
I pull away, suddenly feeling guilty for kissing Brad. Maybe it's because of that comment my mom made asking if Nate was okay with this. I know I don't need Nate's permission, but I also know how much it would hurt him if I dated Brad.
Better If He Goes (Always You Book 1) Page 13