Infatuations

by Barbara Winkes

  Strange, how the fact apparently hadn’t hit home until the moment—this was happening, a once-in-a-lifetime event, something permanent. She saw Pauline wiping her eyes, and Libby’s face lighting up.

  “Jackpot,” she said.

  “I think we found the one.” Cailtyn beamed at her. “What do you say?”

  “I like it. I really do. Could you excuse me for a moment?” With that, she headed back to the dressing room, Caitlyn on her heels.

  “Please,” Jordan said. She barely avoided shutting the door in the young woman’s face, feeling bad, but she could always apologize later. Other things couldn’t wait. She took her cell phone out of the pocket of her coat and swiped through her address book. Waiting for the recipient of the call to pick up, she regarded herself once more in the mirror, spooked beyond reason.

  They were right.

  Jackpot.

  “Hey,” Derek said. “I thought you were busy this morning?”

  “Where are you?”

  “Currently reading the paper on my balcony. Is everything okay?”

  “I need you to come and get me. Say it’s about work, something that can’t wait.”

  “Now I’m worried. That doesn’t sound okay.”

  Jordan wasn’t sure what to answer to that. “Can I count on you?”

  “Of course. Text me the address, and don’t give too many details if you want us to keep our stories straight.”

  “Thank you. I really appreciate it.”

  “I know you do. See you there.”

  * * * *

  True to his word, Derek arrived not much later with a plausible cover story that didn’t make Jordan look too bad. She excused herself and promised everyone to give the dress some more thought.

  When they sat in Derek’s car, she breathed a sigh of relief.

  “So what happened? Did they poke you with the pins?”

  With some distance from the shop and high expectations, she could relax a bit.

  “Give me a minute? I need to check what Ellie’s at, so she doesn’t worry.” She wrote a quick text message to let Ellie know she’d meet her later at Jack and Pauline’s.

  “Is there something to worry about?”

  Jordan wasn’t sure how to answer that, so she didn’t.

  “Did you have lunch yet? I’m starving. I’ll buy,” she added when Derek gave her a quizzical look.

  “Not necessary,” he said. “Are you going to tell me?”

  When I figure it out, she thought. Derek knew her better than most people, but then it was still hard to explain why her reflection had freaked her out this much. The perfect dress for the perfect day. It seemed like an illusion, utterly unattainable.

  “What if I suck at this?” she blurted out.

  “What, being mysterious? You’re pretty good at it. I haven’t got a clue.”

  “Funny. I mean, marriage. Happy ever after.”

  Derek pulled into the narrow parking spot in front of the restaurant.

  “Okay, what’s that supposed to mean? Last time I checked you were pretty happy. You guys bought a house, you wanted to adopt a child…now, what? Wait, don’t tell me…”

  “No. No! Of course not. I have no doubts about Ellie. I love her.”

  “It’s probably just nerves,” he offered. “I imagine there’s quite a bit to do in the weeks to come.”

  “That’s not it. What I mean is…look where I come from. My mother cheated. I did. I’ve done a few things I’m not proud of, and…Ellie makes all the smart decisions. She could do so much better.”

  “Are you even listening to yourself?”

  At this moment, Jordan wasn’t even sure what point she was trying to make, but it was something that still rang true. No matter how hard she had tried to push the feeling aside.

  “Well, Bethany said so. Speaking about herself, not Ellie, that is.”

  “Yeah, that’s another reason why I don’t like her.”

  “She had a point.” If that were true for Bethany, maybe it was true for Kathryn as well. In the present, Kathryn had found young women to whom she wanted to be a parental figure. Maybe she, too, thought she could do better, that Jordan wasn’t good enough for her.

  “No, she didn’t. She could have ended it, but she worked your guilt for all it was worth. As for your birthmother, she managed to stay married after all, and so did your parents. If you really want to go there, then you have nothing to worry about.”

  Jordan admitted to herself that she actually hadn’t considered this angle. It was strange to think of Kathryn as someone to look to for anything, but it was true—she had managed to maintain her marriage all through her turbulent life. Regardless of all the mistakes she’d made, and there were plenty, she had recently helped young women in a desperate situation. So was it okay to pick and choose?

  “I can’t believe I did this,” she said ruefully. “I mean…This is my responsibility, right? It’s up to me not to screw it up, not Kathryn, or Bethany.”

  “Exactly. Now what is this case we’re supposed to be working? We better keep our stories straight for the dinner party later.”

  It took Jordan a moment to understand why they’d be going to the same dinner party at Pauline’s, then she made the connection.

  “So you and Kate are definitely on again,” she stated.

  “We’re taking it slow. That’s all I can tell you.”

  “That’s probably a good idea,” Jordan said, remembering her conversation with Kate. “Okay. Thank you for this. I owe you one conversation in case of a freak-out.”

  He shook his head, amused. “We’re good.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  Ellie was in love with everything about this day, even through traces of melancholy kept creeping in as she imagined how much her parents would have liked to share it with her. They wouldn’t be able to see her make a commitment to the woman she loved, officially, legally. She was grateful that Madeline was here.

  When Kate received a text message from Derek about working a case with Jordan, out of the blue, she wasn’t sure what to make of it, but Ellie did have an idea.

  Not that she could do anything about it now.

  She distracted herself with a mental to-do list for the beginning of the following week. Waters had decided that he didn’t consider Stanton a person of interest in the murders of Marco Raynor and the waitress, Rena Kelly, after all. Fortunately, Ellie had friends in the department, and she’d continue to ask around unobtrusively. True, she didn’t like Stanton for his attitude and his history of domestic violence. That alone, she knew, would be hard to sell as a reason to continue digging. Associating with a major league drug dealer would work, and if that saved another woman who might otherwise get involved with this man, even better.

  She cast another look at her mirror image.

  Ellie knew that at whatever point it was they had arrived, she and Jordan had earned it, every bit of it. She suspected that Jordan had seen something slightly different in the mirror.

  * * * *

  By the time they found each other at Pauline’s, Ellie had to admit that the day’s activities, while worth-while, had been exhausting. She had tried many different dresses until finding the one, and was now hungry and grateful for a place to sit, and the glass of wine Jordan brought her.

  “So, what was the emergency?” she asked when Jordan sat down next to her. Ellie could tell by Jordan’s slightly guilty expression that she was on the right track.

  “It’s kind of hard to explain.”

  Perhaps it was, for Jordan, in the light of day, from an adult perspective. It was also fairly easy.

  “Did you find a dress?”

  “I did.”

  “That’s good news, right?” Ellie wasn’t going to drag out a conversation that was clearly uncomfortable for Jordan. She had a suspicion as to why, but she needed a little more information. “There was no case, was there?”

  Jordan leaned back against the headrest, and sighed. “I suppose Derek didn’t
have to tell you. I’m really sorry. You know it doesn’t mean I don’t want this.”

  “I know. What does it mean?”

  “Nothing. Can’t we just forget about it?”

  “Just bear with me for a moment, okay? I might be wrong, but I think you saw something perfect, and it startled you, because you didn’t think it could be for you, ever.”

  “That sounds disturbingly right.” Jordan shook her head. “It doesn’t make sense. Perhaps I should make another appointment with the shrink.”

  “It’s all good. We’ll figure it out together, and meanwhile, just believe me that you deserve everything perfect. We do. I love you.”

  Ellie leaned in for a quick kiss, aware that she was choking herself up. How would she ever make it through the wedding vows?

  * * * *

  It came to no surprise when, the next morning, Ellie found out that she was on her own for the workday. She didn’t mind either. Her partner’s absence bode well for her plans, but there was something she needed to do first. After a quick run to the coffee shop across the street, she went straight to Detective Doss’s desk.

  “Do you have a moment?”

  Maria Doss looked up from the file she was reading, and, seeing Ellie holding a tray with two tall coffees and muffins, she obviously decided the answer was yes.

  “Sit, please. We have a chance to make all of this disappear before the lieutenant comes back from his meeting. Where’s your partner?”

  “Taking a half day today,” Ellie told her.

  Doss didn’t look surprised. “What do you need?”

  “I could use some advice, but since Cliff isn’t here, I was wondering if you could tell me something…If he says to let go of something, is it usually legit?”

  “Straight to the point. Look, I can’t give you a general answer here, but I guess you already found out that he does his own thing. He’s not especially keen on hearing other people’s opinions, especially when those people are female. Does that help?”

  “Kind of,” Ellie admitted. “I have noticed that before, and it’s definitely still true.”

  “When we first started working together, he asked me if my brother was in a gang. My brother is an accountant and unlike me, has never seen a gun or a gang member up close, but that’s what Waters does. He goes just far enough to annoy you, not enough to get fired. I almost felt sorry for you when the lieutenant assigned you to him, but frankly, not sorry enough. I enjoy work quite a bit more now. At least it won’t be too long for you with his retirement coming up.” She held up her cup. “And this is why I shouldn’t talk to anyone before the first coffee. Sorry about that.”

  “It’s okay.” If anything, Ellie was getting nothing but confirmation that she’d be doing the right thing. “Look, there’s this guy who seems to be on the periphery of a case, but I have nothing solid yet. I wonder how far I can go on a hunch.”

  “That depends on how relevant you think they are. Are you sure they’re going to lead to something? Do more of the footwork and then bring it to Esposito. If you bring her something good enough, she’ll give you the warrants.”

  “Hm.”

  “Do absolutely nothing without a warrant.” Maria had misinterpreted her reaction.

  “I know, I know. I think I have an idea.”

  “Perhaps Cliff’s half day is a good opportunity to follow up on that, if you think it’s a good use of taxpayer money.”

  “Oh, I’m sure it is. Thank you, Maria.”

  “No problem. Thanks for the snack.”

  “I hope you understand I couldn’t discuss this with Jordan.” Ellie wasn’t sure she’d meant to reveal this, but Maria nodded.

  “It’s okay. Dating within the same department can be tricky, and you’re new, but don’t worry. I think you’re doing just fine.”

  “Thanks.” Ellie got to her feet and picked up her own coffee. “You’ve helped a lot.”

  Back at her own desk, she went once more over the statements of Ryan Lemont, Jayne and Ashley. Was there a connection between Marco Raynor and Lemont after all? Jayne seemed to have been grateful for the watch “cleaning up the neighborhood,” cracking down on drug dealers. Her apartment and Ashley’s were within less a mile from one another, both of them within the area that might have been on the radar of Bob Stanton and his friends. In one direction, Patton Lake Park, tourist accommodations and expensive condos, in the other, a more forgotten neighborhood with a high amount of crime threatening to spill over into the more pittoresque surroundings close by. She needed a more detailed picture to figure out who had killed Raynor, and if his death was at all related to the neighborhood watch. At the same time, Ellie didn’t want to miss anything if there was any kind of wrongdoing on the group’s part.

  She took some notes to take with her, and went to find Casey and Sam Potts.

  “Hey there. I need a bit of help finding potential witnesses,” she began, a bit awkward with her friend and the new rookie. In her mind, Ellie was amused at herself. When she had still been in uniform, the detectives never seemed to worry about asking for additional personnel. And this was important, not just a hunch of hers. Marco Raynor was a victim who deserved justice like any other.

  Fortunately, the two officers had no intention of arguing with her, and so she showed them Ashley’s and Jayne’s apartments on the map, and the area in which she wanted to explore more of the neighborhood watch’s reach, and the neighbors’ opinion on it.

  “I want to know if they’ve seen Stanton and the others around, and if the presence is a helpful or a threatening one. Bring everything to me.”

  “Sure, no problem,” Casey answered for the two of them. Sam looked excited. “We’ll meet you there?”

  “Yes. I’m going to start with Ashley.”

  * * * *

  “You again. What do you want? I already told you everything, and so did Jayne. I just want to put all of this behind me, is that too much to ask?”

  Ellie waited until Ashley had finished. She could certainly understand about wanting to leave traumatic experiences in the past—but, it was also her experience that unless you had illuminated every corner of the story, it could always come back to haunt you.

  “I understand. Please hear me out,” she added when Ashley scoffed. “I know you want to get your life back on track, and that will work best if Ryan can’t interfere with it anymore. He’s not giving up much, but we know he has contacts in the area. Jayne told us about the neighborhood watch.” If some of them were working with Lemont, these types could be just as dangerous to Ashley or women like her. Ellie didn’t say that out loud. She waited until her words had sunk in.

  “If you’re telling me to move, forget about it. I can’t afford it. As long as you keep Ryan behind bars, I’ll be okay. If he gets out…Well, you know what happened to that waitress. I didn’t tell on him, but don’t think that will make a difference.”

  “We hope to make a difference, for everyone in this community.”

  Ashley laughed bitterly. “Because of the tourists nearby?”

  “Because it’s our job to serve and protect everyone, and we hope that you can trust us again,” Ellie insisted. She couldn’t blame the woman for her fatalistic attitude. Apparently the police hadn’t been much of a help to anyone around here in recent years. “That neighborhood watch Jayne mentioned, are you aware of them?”

  “Vaguely.” Ashley shrugged. “I know there was talk about how they might be involved with the homeless folks’ deaths. That’s a shame, anyway. They didn’t hurt anyone.”

  “I agree. I understand there have been altercations, though the members of the watch weren’t involved in those murders. Is there anything else you can tell me about them? Did you ever see Ryan with one of them, or did he talk to you about them?”

  “I value being alive, so I never asked much about his business,” Ashley said. “He was laughing at them. He said that if they wanted to clean up the neighborhood, they’d have to start with themselves. I didn’t press him
on details.”

  “Did you discuss the situation with any neighbors, friends…Jayne?”

  Another shrug. “Look, it’s a rough neighborhood. You try to avoid the guys with the guns, regardless of what their intention might be. It’s safer. I know Jayne doesn’t see it that way, but in my opinion it’s nothing but a pissing contest. They haven’t helped anyone.”

  “Thank you, Ashley. If you can think of anything else, please call me.”

  “Sure.”

  Ellie could tell from her tone that a call wasn’t likely. A tad disappointed, she left the apartment, turning around one the front stairs to see movement behind the window. From the start, she’d been sure that Ashley hadn’t told her the whole story.

  She was on her way to meet with Sam and Casey when she got the text message.

  Don’t ever tell her I gave you her name, but you should talk to Addy. Folks tried to clean out her block. Ellie fed the address into her GPS and texted Casey to meet in an hour.

  For all the smoke and mirrors, Addy Henson put two and two together quickly. She stayed behind the chain, door locked, casting a suspicious look at Ellie’s badge.

  “I’m not sure what Ashley is thinking, but I have no desire or reason to talk to the police,” she said, giving it back.

  “Could I come in?”

  “If you have a warrant, sure.”

  Ellie straightened her shoulders. “You’ve done nothing wrong, but it would really help me if you could answer some questions. It might help Ashley too.”

  “Seems like Ashley’s doing whatever she can to help herself these days.” Addy shrugged and removed the chain. “Come on in,” she said, opening the door wide. “Better than me being seen talking to you.”

  Ellie followed her into the modest apartment, aware that she had no time to waste.

  “Do you know a Bob Stanton?” she asked. Addy spun around, an expression of disbelief and shock on her face. So she did.

  “Why? I thought this was about Ashley and the drug dealer she was dating.”

  “It is. So you know Mr. Stanton.”