Raven Rocks!

by J. E. Bright

  The Teen Titans raised their jack-o’-lanterns, pointing the blazing faces at the Halloween Spirit. Brilliant light shot from the pumpkins’ eyes, merging together to form an awesome beam of pure energy.

  The blast of power shot toward the Halloween Spirit and zapped it. The specter shuddered in pain.

  Raven rolled another pumpkin directly under the Halloween Spirit. As the beams of power continued to weaken the spirit, the new pumpkin drew the Halloween Spirit down into itself. In a burst, the Halloween Spirit became trapped inside, creating a terrifying jack-o’-lantern face on the pumpkin.

  The citizens of Jump City cheered, and the Teen Titans jumped up and down in celebration.

  “Best Halloween ever!” screamed Beast Boy.

  “Let’s do it again next year!” added Cyborg.

  Raven hovered beside her happy friends. “Thanks for spending Halloween with me, guys,” she said. “There’s just one last thing.…”

  “What?” asked Robin.

  Raven flicked on a flashlight under her chin, casting her face in eerie shadows. “Boo,” she said.

  Starfire, Cyborg, Robin, and Beast Boy scrambled away, screaming in fear.

  Raven smiled. “I love Halloween.”

  The adorable winged horses Sparkleface and Butterbean were chatting pleasantly in the shimmering, colorful Cotton Candy Grove.

  “Oh no, Sparkleface,” said Butterbean. “The cotton candy isn’t growing because there hasn’t been a shower in weeks.”

  Sparkleface tilted her pink head in confusion. “But it rained just yesterday, Butterbean.”

  “Not that kind of shower, silly,” replied Butterbean. “It needs a shower of compliments!”

  Sparkleface laughed. “Of course it does,” she said. She leaned over to whisper to the wispy mounds of spun sugar. “You’re the most amazing cotton candy ever!”

  “And so delicious, too,” added Butterbean. “Yum, yum, yum!”

  Under their loving attention, the cotton candy glowed and grew larger, basking in their kind words.

  “Look,” cheered Sparkleface. “It’s working!”

  Suddenly, the harsh sounds of thumping drums echoed throughout the grove. The cotton candy withered and drooped.

  “Oh no!” cried Sparkleface. “That noise is ruining the cotton candy’s natural fluffiness.”

  Butterbean twitched her yellow ears as she listened. “It’s coming from the unicorns,” she realized.

  They met each other’s eyes with matching worried looks.

  Raven hovered above the sidewalk in Jump City as she watched her favorite TV show, Pretty, Pretty Pegasus, in the big window of a department store. Her eyes had the same worried look as Butterbean and Sparkleface on the TV screen. “The unicorns sound like trouble,” muttered Raven.

  “Hey, Raven,” called Robin behind her.

  “What?” asked Raven, turning around. A few feet away, her Teen Titans teammates were battling a chunky villain named Control Freak. Even though Control Freak was holding up his powerful remote-control device, the Titans were definitely winning.

  “You want to get in on the fun?” asked Robin as he kicked the villain.

  “It’s just Control Freak,” replied Raven. “I’m good.”

  Robin shrugged. “It’s your loss,” he said. He took out his bo staff and whacked Control Freak with it. The smack knocked the villain over, and Control Freak rolled against the department store wall.

  Upside down, Control Freak noticed the show Raven was watching. “Oooh,” he said. “Is this a new episode of Pretty, Pretty Pegasus?”

  “Yeah,” answered Raven. “The unicorns are playing their music too loud and ruining all the cotton candy.”

  Control Freak waggled his legs, trying to get up. “Sounds like a doozy of a problem,” he said. “But there’s nothing friendship can’t fix.”

  “That’s what I love about the show,” said Raven. “It has such good messages.”

  Control Freak managed to roll himself right side up. “It’s nice to see a cartoon where the characters don’t have to solve every problem through violence.”

  Cyborg grabbed Control Freak’s thick leg and yanked him into the air. “You like TV so much, here’s a rerun of your last beat-down!” shouted Cyborg. He slammed him against the pavement. “Shablamo!”

  Control Freak yelped.

  Before the villain could recover, Beast Boy turned into a gorilla and jumped up and down on him with his four-hundred-pound body. “Yo,” he said, “how do I turn down the volume on your cries of pain, fool? Kaboom!”

  “Ow,” gasped Control Freak. “Ow. Ow!”

  Starfire blasted the orange-haired bad guy with energy beams from her eyes. “I do not know how to make the television reference!” she yelled.

  Control Freak slammed back into the department store wall again. He managed to hold up his remote control.

  “Put down the remote, Control Freak,” ordered Robin. “Haven’t you had enough?”

  “You know what I like about remote controls, Robin?” asked Control Freak. “If you don’t like what’s happening, you can change the channel.”

  The villain pointed his remote at the Titans. He pressed a big button on the bottom.

  The whole area exploded with blinding white light.

  The Teen Titans gasped and moaned, rubbing the dazzling flares from their eyes.

  When their vision returned, they were amazed and alarmed to find themselves in a brightly colored place filled with sparkling, cartoony vegetation.

  Robin held up his staff. “Where has Control Freak’s remote transported us this time?”

  Raven peered around at the candy cane bushes and lollipop flowers. “Oooh,” she said.

  “It is certainly somewhere beautiful,” said Starfire.

  Raven’s eyes shone with wonder. “Aaah,” she breathed.

  “Uh,” said Cyborg, “you okay, Raven?”

  Raven clasped her hands together, gaping at the gumdrop trees and cotton candy bushes. “Gaah,” she sighed.

  “Did you hit your head?” Beast Boy asked.

  “Do you know where we are?” whispered Raven.

  Control Freak’s giant head appeared in the sky above the Titans. “I do!” he said. “I’ve transported you all into the newest episode of Pretty, Pretty Pegasus!”

  “Thank you so much!” Raven called up to Control Freak. “It’s a dream come true.”

  Control Freak grinned. “It’ll be a nightmare, because if you can’t discover the way out, you’ll be trapped here forever.”

  “Really?” squealed Raven, thrilled. “Forever?”

  “Yes, forever!” replied Control Freak. “You’ll be stuck with the pegasuses.…” He scratched his orange hair. “Pegasi? What’s the plural of pegasus?”

  “A flerd,” answered Raven. “It’s half flock, half herd.”

  Control Freak rolled his eyes. “Holy smokes, you’re a nerd,” he said. “I’m out.” His huge floating head vanished from view.

  Robin peered at a shrub of gumdrops. “We have to get out of here, fast,” he said. “This place is a breeding ground for cavities.”

  “But how?” Starfire asked.

  Beast Boy turned into a dopey-looking pony. “It’s a horse show,” he explained. “So we probably have to hold hands and talk about the power of friendship or something stupid.”

  Robin reached out for his teammates’ hands. “It’s worth a shot.”

  Starfire held Robin’s hand. Beast Boy held Starfire’s and Raven’s. Raven held Cyborg’s. Cyborg held Robin’s, too.

  “You’re my friend,” Robin said warmly to Cyborg.

  Cyborg smiled. “You’re my friend, too.”

  Beast Boy grinned. “We’re all friends,” he gushed.

  “I like the friends,” said Starfire.

  Robin waited a moment, peering around at their extra-cheerful surroundings.

  Nothing happened.

  Robin dropped Starfire’s and Cyborg’s hands in disgust. “We’re st
ill here,” he complained. “You guys aren’t being friendly enough.”

  “Surely I am being the friendly!” retorted Starfire.

  Cyborg pointed a furious finger at her. “I’m being way friendly!” he yelled. Then he swung his finger to point at Beast Boy. “This is his fault!”

  “You’re crazy,” said Beast Boy. “I invented friendship!”

  Beast Boy, Robin, Cyborg, and Starfire argued with one another about who was a good friend or a bad friend.

  Finally, Raven couldn’t take it anymore. “Guys!” she screamed.

  Her teammates froze to look at her.

  “This is not acceptable behavior in King Jellybean’s candy kingdom,” Raven scolded.

  Cyborg nodded, his mechanical eye twinkling. “You’re right,” he said. “Marshal Marshmallow might throw us into the Peppermint Prison.”

  “Thank you, Cyborg,” said Raven.

  Cyborg looked surprised. “Is that a real guy?” he asked. “I was trying to make fun of you.”

  Raven covered her forehead with her hand. “Look,” she said. “This world may seem ridiculous to you, but these cotton candy bushes have gotten me through some dark times. Now, c’mon, if anyone can help us, it’s Butterbean and Sparkleface.”

  She led her teammates through the sugary world, following the candy path until they saw the flerd’s village up ahead.

  The Teen Titans approached the village cautiously, not wanting to alarm its sweet inhabitants.

  Raven felt more and more nervous and excited the closer to the village they walked. “Oh my gosh,” she said when she saw Butterbean and Sparkleface in the village. “There they are! I have to talk to them.” She started to run ahead, but Robin jumped in her way.

  “Wait, Raven,” warned Robin. “Making contact with fictional characters could permanently alter their reality.”

  “Perhaps Beast Boy can disguise himself as the pegasus?” suggested Starfire.

  “Sorry,” replied Beast Boy. “I don’t do mythological creatures.”

  Cyborg slapped him on the back. “Bro, it’s just a horse with bird wings,” he said. “You can do it.”

  Beast Boy looked unsure. “I guess I could give it a shot,” he said. He closed his eyes and concentrated hard, straining to use his powers in a way they were never meant to be used.

  The Titans stepped back as Beast Boy popped into the form of a half-horse, half-bird creature. He was horrifyingly ugly, with a bird beak on a horse head, bird wings, two skinny legs, a long tail, and patchy feathers.

  Beast Boy collapsed onto the ground, unable to walk or fly in his newly misshaped body. He crawled a little before flopping down again. “Dude, this is agony,” he moaned. “Like pulling a muscle and having brain freeze at the same time.”

  “Just go talk to them,” Robin ordered.

  Slowly, painfully, Beast Boy dragged himself into the village.

  In the middle of their settlement, Butterbean and Sparkleface pondered the harsh music that thumped in the distance.

  “Maybe if we give the unicorns juice and cookies they will stop playing their loud music,” said Butterbean.

  “That’s a great idea, Butterbean,” said Sparkleface.

  They both gasped when they saw Beast Boy crawling into the clearing.

  “Hello, friends,” groaned Beast Boy. His mishmash of a body collapsed in miserable exhaustion.

  Sparkleface and Butterbean screamed.

  Hiding in the bushes with Robin, Cyborg, and Starfire, Raven listened to Butterbean and Sparkleface scream. “This isn’t working,” said Raven worriedly.

  “Just give Beast Boy some time,” replied Robin. “He knows what he’s doing.”

  But Beast Boy kept moaning in agony, and Butterbean and Sparkleface kept screaming in total terror.

  “I can’t take this,” Raven said. “I’ve got to talk to them.”

  She pushed out of the bushes and floated over to Butterbean and Sparkleface. She couldn’t help giving them each a big hug. “This is amazing!” she squealed. “You guys are even fluffier in person.”

  Butterbean and Sparkleface gaped at the Titans. “Who are you?” Butterbean asked.

  “My name is Raven,” said the half demon. She waved her hand at her teammates. “These are my friends.”

  Sparkleface shook her glittering mane. “Would you like to be part of our flerd?” she asked.

  “Uh, yes!” replied Raven.

  Butterbean danced happily on her hooves. “Then let’s sing the friendship song!”

  Robin stepped in front of Raven. “Absolutely not,” he said. “We need your help to find our way home.”

  “We’d love to help you,” said Sparkleface, “but we’re having a very big problem with our unicorn neighbors.” She cocked her ear to listen to the violent sounds in the air. “They won’t turn down their loud music.”

  “Have you not tried punching their faces?” asked Starfire.

  Sparkleface and Butterbean glanced at each other in confusion.

  “That’s not a way to make friends,” said Sparkleface.

  Robin groaned. “We’re wasting time here,” he growled. “We have to find a way out!”

  “Maybe this is the way out,” Raven argued. “What if Control Freak put us in the episode to help them solve their problems and learn a lesson?”

  “Learn a lesson?” repeated Robin, considering. “That does sound like the MO of that black-hearted couch potato.”

  “Take us to the unicorns,” Starfire said to Sparkleface and Butterbean.

  Cyborg vaulted onto Sparkleface’s back. “Giddyup!” he shouted.

  Sparkleface buckled under Cyborg’s crushing weight. “Why would you do that?” she cried.

  “I just thought maybe you could give me a ride?” said Cyborg apologetically.

  Sparkleface wept big tears. “My spine feels like a thousand broken promises,” she sobbed.

  After Sparkleface recovered, the flerd and the Titans made their way across the bright and sweet landscape to the unicorn castle. The wild music got louder as they got closer to the castle’s towers.

  They sneaked up to the castle and peered through a low window. Inside was a wide room with the unicorns Buttermilk Biscuit and Jelly Roll dancing in the middle, clip-clopping their hooves on the stones while tooting music out their horns. A unicorn named High Step stood in a DJ booth, mixing music on a turntable. Powerful sound waves echoed out of the room.

  “Okay, Titans, here’s the plan,” whispered Robin. “I’ll incapacitate them with some tear gas. Cyborg, you hit them with your sonic cannon—”

  “No,” Raven interrupted. “That’s not how the flerd solves problems. We need to talk to them and work this out together, so we can all be friends.”

  Robin rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he said. He hissed to Cyborg, “But if things go south…”

  Cyborg nodded, readying the sonic cannon built into his hand.

  Raven walked up to the castle’s front door and knocked politely.

  It only took a second for a unicorn to open it. “Hello,” said Buttermilk Biscuit. “May I help you?”

  “We were hoping you would keep the music down a little bit?” asked Raven.

  Buttermilk Biscuit smiled but shook his head no. “I’m afraid we can’t do that, friend.”

  Butterbean stepped up beside Raven. “I’m glad you agree we are friends,” she said, “but—”

  Robin stepped in front of Butterbean. “Please,” he said. “We’ll handle this.” He raised a clenched fist. “Titans, go!” he hollered, rolling a canister of tear gas into the castle.

  The other Titans followed Robin as he rushed inside. As he passed Buttermilk Biscuit, Robin whacked the unicorn with his bo staff.

  High Step, still wearing his DJ earphones, rushed over to help, but Beast Boy transformed into an elephant and slapped the unicorn back with his trunk.

  Starfire flew around the room, zooming down at Jelly Roll. She fired an eye blast at his horn.

  “My horn!�
� screeched Jelly Roll as the blast melted it.

  Cyborg hurdled over the DJ booth, smashing all the musical equipment into a pile of rubble.

  Afraid of all the violence, Butterbean and Sparkleface huddled in the doorway.

  “That was scary,” said Sparkleface.

  “Very scary,” Butterbean agreed. “But… it made the unicorns stop playing their music.”

  Raven rushed into the room to help the bashed unicorns. “I’m so sorry!” she said.

  “What’s wrong with you guys?” cried Buttermilk Biscuit. He had a big lump on his head where Robin whacked him.

  “You never even tried talking to us,” complained Jelly Roll. “Use your words.”

  “But you said you weren’t going to turn down the music,” argued Robin.

  “The loud beats from our horns were the only things that kept the Gumdrop Goblin from leaving his cave and eating all the candy,” Buttermilk Biscuit explained.

  “Oooh,” said Beast Boy.

  “Yeah,” said Cyborg. “Gotcha.”

  Outside the castle, the angry hollering of the Gumdrop Goblin echoed across the land.

  “Oh no!” cried Butterbean. “He’s going to be here any moment!”

  Starfire peered worriedly at Jelly Roll’s melted horn. “Can you not drop the beats with one less horn?”

  “We get our strength by playing together in harmony,” said Buttermilk Biscuit.

  Jelly Roll went a little cross-eyed as he tried to look up at his melted horn. “Maybe I can still play,” he said hopefully. He tried to blow through it, but it made a horrible blat sound.

  “My ears!” yelled Beast Boy.

  Jelly Roll blushed in embarrassment and began to weep. “It’s not working,” he sobbed.

  The other unicorns all started to cry, too.

  Robin leaped up to Buttermilk Biscuit. He slapped the unicorn in the face. “Get it together!” he shouted. Then he slapped High Step. “Snap out of it!” Robin backhanded Jelly Roll. “Get your horns in the game!”