He gazed into my eyes. I stared back at him. The tension built between us. In my mind, I thought maybe he was just waiting for me to make the first move. He didn’t seem to be in any hurry to get away.
I parted my lips. I prepared myself to kiss him, but as I stared at him, I just couldn’t do it. Max meant everything to me. I wasn’t brave enough to risk that just yet.
“Good night, Max.” I leaned up and kissed his cheek.
He wrapped his arms around me and held me in a warm hug for longer than he needed to.
“Don’t forget me, famous author.” He murmured his words beside my ear.
“Ha, I know the first isn’t possible. And the second isn’t likely.”
“You’re famous in my eyes.” He smiled and released me. “Congratulations again.”
“Thanks.”
I stared into his eyes. Was I brave enough? Was I bold enough? Was I Zara enough?
As he walked away, I couldn’t bring myself to stop him. I still had one secret that I was keeping from Max, and I was going to continue keeping it—for now.
I turned to head into my apartment.
I was almost to the door when Kat intercepted me.
“I saw your book go live.”
“You did?” I was surprised.
“Sure. As an e-book. But I want a hard copy. You haven’t forgotten our deal, right?” She raised an eyebrow.
“No, I haven’t forgotten.” I smiled.
“Don’t forget, I get the first copy.” She snapped her fingers and then walked off down the hallway.
I let myself into my apartment. I was still feeling giddy with excitement. I couldn’t wait to see what the next few days would bring. Now that I’d published my first book, the world would have a chance to give its opinion on my writing. No matter what it was, my accomplishment couldn’t be taken away. It couldn’t be erased. I had done it and I was proud of it.
It was one small way that I was becoming more like Zara myself.
Single Wide Female: The Bucket List
19 Walk Across Hot Coals
By
Lillianna Blake
Copyright © 2015 Lillianna Blake
Cover design by Beetiful Book Covers
All rights reserved.
LilliannaBlake.com
Chapter 1
My fingers trembled in their position poised above my keyboard. This was it. This was the moment when my inspiration would strike. I was sure of it. I’d lit and positioned candles around my desk. There was soft music playing to help my mind drift into the book. Beside my computer was a small bowl of snacks to munch on so that I wouldn’t have to leave my chair. Everything was the way it needed to be in order for me to write.
But my fingers only trembled. They did not type.
“Ugh!” I wheeled back in my computer chair with frustration. I pushed a bit too hard and ended up slamming into the edge of my bed. The jarring collision made my neck jerk.
“Great, now I’ve got writer’s whiplash and writer’s block.”
This had been going on for the better part of a week. I stared at the same paragraph on the document that I’d been attempting to expand every day. It wasn’t getting any larger. On the other hand, the bowl of snacks beside my computer was dwindling quite quickly.
I felt as if I’d hit a stale point. Even though I was still dedicated to the bucket list, as well as to my diet, I hadn’t been following through very well. In fact, I had missed my last two exercise days. There was this sensation of laziness coursing through me.
“I can’t give up now.”
I stood up and walked over to the mirror. It had been a while since I really looked at my body. I had lost some weight, and that made it easy to just settle in and think that I could relax for a while. But it was easy for me to see that some of the weight was already beginning to sneak back on. Areas of my stomach that had at one time been closer to flat than fat were beginning to pooch out again. I was afraid that I saw the early stages of a double chin. It was happening far too fast.
“It is far easier to put a pound on than to take a pound off.”
I sighed and picked up the bowl of snacks. There was no point in continuing to try to write. All I was really doing was staring at a screen and eating. That wasn’t exactly productive.
As I carried the bowl into the kitchen, I thought about some of the items I had left on my bucket list. From memory, there weren’t really any that were speaking to me at the moment. I hadn’t really done anything exciting lately. Maybe it was time for me to find a new adventure that could get me focused on my path again. I wasn’t going to find that by sitting in my apartment all day. I needed to get out and see the world.
I glanced down at my pajama pants.
“First, I need to get dressed.”
I dug through my closet. I did my best to ignore the motivation clothes I had hanging in the front. Every time I went down a dress size, I would buy another outfit in a size smaller. Then I would hang it in my closet as a reminder to keep up my progress.
However, today I had to dig to the back of my closet for a larger size due to my recent slip-ups. I didn’t want to be reminded of the fact that I hadn’t been paying attention to my eating or my exercise plan. I threw on some clothes and headed out the door.
I was feeling pretty low as I walked down the sidewalk. My writing wasn’t going well, I was gaining weight, and I still couldn’t seem to land a date. I wanted more than anything to feel enthusiastic about life, but instead I saw only a dreary future ahead of me. What I needed was a sign, something to point me in the right direction.
I was almost to the Fluff and Stuff when I noticed a small folding table set up in front of the library. A man who looked far too well-dressed to be selling anything sat behind the table. There was a big sign taped to the front.
Your Dreams Can Come True: Breaking Through the Barriers of Fear
I stopped dead in my tracks. I didn’t think there could be a clearer message from the universe. It was as if the table had been plopped down in front of me just to give me some direction.
I crossed the street to reach it. When I paused in front of the table, the man smiled at me.
“Are you interested in achieving your dreams?”
“Who isn’t?” I laughed. “But I doubt it’s as simple as you make it seem.”
“Shouldn’t it be that simple, though?”
“I suppose it should, but that’s not how it usually works.”
“What if I told you it’s as simple as getting out of your own way?” He smiled so wide that I could see dimples in his cheeks.
“I would say what are you selling and how much does it cost?”
“Because it’s the last chance to sign up and we had some last-minute cancellations, we’ve lowered the price. It’s an overnight seminar with an amazing motivational speaker. It’s a chance to get away from everything that is holding you back or slowing you down. It’s really an amazing experience.”
“Sounds amazing.” I had to restrain myself from rolling my eyes. In my experience, anyone that was so convinced of something was either wrong or a little mentally unstable.
“You won’t know unless you give it a try. Only one hundred dollars—and you could be on your way to realizing your dreams.”
“Why does it cost me one hundred dollars to realize my dreams?” I was skeptical as I looked at him.
“Here is everything that the seminar provides. Really, the one hundred dollars barely covers the cost of the campground rental. Then there are also several activities to engage in. Worst case scenario, you meet some nice new people and have a nice campout—best case, you change your life forever.”
Chapter 2
The man was so enigmatic that I found myself smiling. He handed me a pamphlet.
As I ran through my budget in my head, I knew that it was more than what I wanted to spend. However, it did seem like divine intervention to stumble upon a motivational seminar when I so desperately needed motivation.
<
br /> “It’s tonight?”
“Yes. It starts at six. There’s an overnight campout and then in the morning there are activities.” He pointed to the brochure. “The list of activities is in here. The speaker is amazing. He truly changed my life.”
I found the hard sell a little suspicious. Still, everything seemed to be falling into place at the perfect time. I had the next day off. I needed inspiration.
“Fine.” I nodded. “Sign me up.”
As I signed a check and handed it to him, I wondered if I’d made a ridiculous mistake. It felt like I was throwing away money that could be put to better use. But the thought of going back to my computer to stare at a blinking cursor all night made me want to take the chance.
“Be back here by five forty-five.” He smiled.
I smiled back. As I walked away I felt him staring at me. An odd worry rippled through me. I wondered what exactly it was that I had just signed up for.
When I got back to my apartment, I threw a few things into an overnight bag. I was actually looking forward to spending the night outside. It was something that I hadn’t done in a long time. I grabbed some bug spray from the bathroom cabinet.
When I walked past my computer, its little blinking light seemed to be calling to me. I was tempted to sit down and write a quick blog post about what I was about to do. I didn’t really have the time and I didn’t want to admit that I’d lost my inspiration and needed to go looking for it.
I decided I would take my laptop with me. If the seminar worked, I might be inspired to write. If it was a bust, the change in environment might be enough to spark something in me.
Once I had everything ready to go, I sent a text to Max. I always made sure that someone knew where I was going to be. Usually that someone was Max. I braced myself for his reaction, as he tended to think that anything on the spiritual side of things was a little too out there.
Camping out tonight. Going to get my inspiration on. I’ll call when I’m done.
Before I could put my phone away he texted me back.
Watch out for rats.
I rolled my eyes and fired a text back.
There won’t be any rats.
His response came like lightning.
Are you sure? You’ll be outside. How can you know for sure? Better bring some cheese.
I had to laugh. Max and his corny jokes always made me smile. I was about to send him a text back when I caught sight of the time in the top corner of my phone. If I didn’t hurry, it was likely that I would miss my entire inspiring adventure.
I reached the spot where I’d signed up for the retreat. However, the table that had been there was now gone. In fact, the street corner was completely empty. My heart began to sink, as I was sure that I’d fallen for a con. Someone now had my checking account information, my name, and my home address.
“Brilliant, Sammy, just brilliant.” I turned to storm off and nearly barreled into a man in a neat black suit.
“Samantha?”
I stared at him for a moment. A stranger in a neat black suit knowing my name could not be a good sign. “Maybe?”
“I’m here to drive you to the retreat.” His smile widened.
“Drive me? I thought there would be a bus, or a minivan or something.”
“No bus, no minivan. Sorry. Just a Lexus.” He gestured to a sleek black car parked a few spaces away.
“Nice.” I smiled with an admiring nod. I was starting to think that this retreat was a really great idea.
He walked me over to the car, opened the door for me, and then closed it once I was inside. This wasn’t just any car. It was one of those fancy cars that had every technological gadget known to man. As the car began to move, I felt a slight twinge of horror-movie fear. Was it really so wise to get into a car with a complete stranger to be driven to a place unknown?
“It is, if it’s a Lexus.” I laughed at myself. I pulled out my phone and took a selfie. Then I sent a text with the picture to Max.
I’ve been abducted by rich people.
Max texted back.
I don’t see any rats in that car!
I sent him the address of where we were headed and then I sat back to enjoy the luxury.
Chapter 3
We traveled about twenty minutes outside of the city. I was actually quite familiar with the park where the retreat was being held. It was used for campgrounds by most of the locals. I knew it had functioning bathrooms and cell service. That was all that really mattered.
When the car stopped, I could see a tangle of people gathered around a few folding tables. The driver opened my door.
“Thanks.” I realized I should have had money to tip him. I didn’t have any cash on me.
“Let me take your bag.” He reached for my laptop bag.
“Oh, no thanks. I’ll keep this with me.”
“I’m afraid I must insist.” He reached for the bag again.
“That’s very kind of you, but I’ve got it just fine.”
On the third grab I took a step back and glared at him.
“It’s in the brochure.” His lips curved in an impatient grimace. “Did you read the brochure?”
“Uh, well. Yes.” In truth I had skimmed it.
“There are no devices allowed during the seminar.”
“Devices? Not even my phone?”
“I’m afraid not. You have to turn it over if you want to participate. All items will be documented and kept safe. It’s just that David prefers that there are no distractions.”
My stomach twisted. No technology? Nicely dressed polite men? Luxury beyond what most could afford? I was beginning to think I had signed myself up for a religious cult.
“Would you like me to talk to David? If it’s a problem for you, he might be willing to make an exception.”
I thought about it for a moment. If the seminar was about getting away from the mundane, I could understand that. It was unusual for me to be away from my phone or computer for an hour, let alone an entire night. I decided that since Max knew where I was, it wasn’t too much of a risk. I could walk home from the park if I needed to. It would be a long hike, but I could do it.
“Alright.” I held the bag out to him. “But please be very careful with it.”
“I promise I will.” He took the bag and my phone.
I braced myself, half expecting a pat-down to make sure I wasn’t sneaking in any other banned technology. Instead, he just turned and walked away.
I decided that I was going to do my best to embrace the entire experience. That meant following the rules, even if I didn’t necessarily agree with them.
In front of me was a very large tent. It was the kind that wedding receptions were hosted in. It reminded me of a revival church service I’d once attended with my grandmother. I could only hope that I would not end up singing hymns.
When I stepped inside the tent I saw that there were at least twenty other people inside. The tent itself was filled with shimmering lights strung from the ceiling. Soft music played from hidden speakers. There was a plush rug rolled out on the floor of the tent. The walls of the tent were filled with photographs of people overcoming obstacles, winning races, or just looking up at the sky. There were also some posters of quotes. I felt as if I’d just stepped directly inside a self-help book.
I paused at the edge of the group. When I saw the man sitting at the front of the tent, obviously positioned as the leader of the seminar, I thought for sure I’d been taken for my money. He was cross-legged with his eyes closed. He had a rather long brown beard. He was not wearing a robe or anything too strange. That was not the problem.
The problem was that he looked like he was in his twenties! How could anyone who was younger than me possibly have wisdom to share with me? Had he even gone to college? Had he even been alive long enough to need inspiration? I felt irritated by his presence rather than inspired.
I considered going home. I knew I wouldn’t be able to get my money back, but at least I wouldn’t waste
my time.
As if he sensed what I was thinking, the man in front smiled. He slowly opened his eyes. When I saw the easy curve of his lips, the relaxed way his long eyelashes framed his kind eyes, I stopped in my tracks. It was the most peaceful expression that I’d ever seen. It made me curious enough to want to stay.
“Welcome, everyone. I’m David.” David stood up. Even the process of his standing was graceful and seamless, as if gravity was kinder to him than it was to the rest of the world.
Everyone around me began to sit. Each person was wrapping their legs into a crossed position.
Fascinated, I moved to sit down. I didn’t really pay any attention to where I was sitting. As soon as my bottom connected with the floor I heard a yelp, followed by a panicked scream. Then I felt a disturbing wiggling beneath one plump cheek. Was it a bug? Was it—as Max had predicted—a rat? I jumped up in horror to discover that I had sat directly on someone’s toe.
“I’m so sorry!”
The older man behind me snatched his foot back and looked up at me with residual fear in his eyes.
“Really, I didn’t even see you there. I’m very sorry. Is your toe okay?”
“I don’t think it’s broken.” He frowned as he looked at me. “You should really check before you sit.”
“I’m very sorry.” My embarrassment rushed to my cheeks. I knew that I’d already drawn far too much attention to myself.
“It’s okay, his toe could use a little reshaping anyway.” The woman beside him smiled warmly at me. “I’m Gail and this is Henry.”
“I’m Samantha.” I shook the hand that she offered.
“Is this your first time?” Gail asked.
“Yes.”
“Oh, we come every time David is offering a seminar nearby. He is an amazing young man!”
I glanced back at the man at the front of the tent. He looked like any other twenty-something man to me, except for the strange peaceful aura he carried. It made me think nothing could ever get under his skin.
But if he was such a good speaker, then why had Gail and Henry had to come back so many times? Shouldn’t one seminar have been enough to put them on the path to realizing their dreams?
“Shh, he’s starting.” Henry waved at us both to quiet down. I could tell that he took David’s words very seriously.
Single Wide Female: The Bucket List Mega Bundle - 24 Books (Books #1-24) Page 54