Always Enough

by Elliott, Kelly

  I was almost positive that if I kept Morgan, my ovaries might send out an SOS to Ty—or any other hard and willing man, for that matter.

  “I love you, little man,” Lincoln said, kissing Blayze on the cheek and then hugging him again. His little arms wrapped around her neck.

  “I love you too. And don’t worry, I’m sure Aunt Kaylee will remember to feed me.”

  Lincoln’s eyes shot up to look at me, a frown on her face. My hands went to my hips, and I stared at her with an open mouth.

  “Seriously, Lincoln, it was one time I forgot to feed the kid! He lived!”

  Blayze laughed while Lincoln rolled her eyes and stood. “You sure you’re okay? Do you want to talk some more?”

  I glanced at the time on my watch, then smiled down at Blayze. “We need to make some dinner, then head on over to the Littlewoods’ place. I’m good. I just needed a cry, I think.”

  She nodded and then stepped closer to me. She pulled me into her arms again.

  “Wow, breastfeeding is working out for you!”

  Lincoln laughed, then pulled back and winked. “Brock thinks so too.”

  I snarled my lip. “You had to take it there, didn’t you?”

  With a half shrug, Lincoln kissed Blayze once more and headed to her car. Glancing back at us, she waved her hand. “Bye, Blayze! See you tomorrow morning!”

  “Have fun!” Blayze and I both said at once.

  Once Lincoln drove off, Blayze and I faced each other. “Pizza and ice cream in town, and then mutton-busting practice?”

  Blayze fist-pumped. “Yes! I love spending the night with you, Aunt Kaylee!”

  Grinning, I took in a deep breath and proudly let it out in one whoosh. I may have been his only aunt, but I knew I was his favorite.

  The moment I pulled up to the Littlewoods’ barn and put my car in park, Blayze was trying to jump out the door.

  “Hey! Your helmet!” I called after him.

  “Gosh dang it, that darn helmet,” Blayze said as he reached back into the car and grabbed his helmet.

  “The apple didn’t fall far from the tree, I see.”

  Blayze gave me a look that said he had no idea what that meant.

  As we walked toward the corral, Blayze reached up and took my hand, causing a fluttering sensation to take hold in my stomach.

  Brad stood there with a huge smile on his face. Too huge. Something was up.

  Right at that moment, out from the barn appeared Dirk. Blayze dropped my hand and ran directly for him, jumping into his arms.

  “Uncle Dirk!” he cried out as Dirk lifted him up and gave him a hug.

  I couldn’t help the smile that grew across my face as I walked up to Brad. “Nice secret you kept there, Brad.”

  He laughed. “Hell, the boy surprised me.”

  I focused back on Dirk and Blayze. Dirk was currently handing something to Blayze. They were both looking at it intently.

  When I first met Dirk Littlewood, I was taken by him, but not because he was handsome as hell with his dark hair and dreamy green eyes. I liked him because he was just a nice guy. A manwhore, but a nice guy who treated his friends with love and respect. Dirk was the type of guy who would drop everything to help out a friend.

  Dirk hadn’t come home to Hamilton very often since Brock retired. I knew that bothered his folks, and his mother had said more than once she wished Dirk would follow in Brock’s footsteps and retire. I didn’t see that happening anytime soon. He was on a roll and seemed to have slipped right into the number one spot Brock had walked away from. From what I’d heard, Dirk was already on fire this season, and there was no way he would walk away when he was on top.

  Then he looked over and saw me. He shook his head. “Damn, girl, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes.”

  I laughed as he pulled me into his arms and spun me around before placing me back on solid ground.

  “Aunt Kaylee was sad earlier and crying.”

  Everyone looked down at Blayze; then two sets of adult male eyes were on me.

  “You all right, Kaylee?” Brad asked. Dirk wore a scowl and appeared ready to kick the person’s ass who had made me cry.

  I rubbed the top of Blayze’s head. “Gosh, way to sell a girl out, there, Blayze,” I said, chuckling. “I’m fine, Brad. Honest. It was just a girly thing.”

  He nodded. When I looked at Dirk, I could tell he clearly wasn’t convinced.

  “Dad, you got this with Blayze? I think Kaylee and I need to exercise those two mares in there.”

  Brad nodded. “I’ve got this. Blayze, let’s get on your helmet and have us some fun with the sheep.”

  “Dirk, I’m fine, and I need to keep an eye on Blayze.”

  “Dad’s got Blayze. Come on, girl.” He took my hand and pulled me toward the barn.

  “Blayze, do you want me to stay?” I called back.

  “Nah, girls make me nervous when they watch me. I need to perfect my sport without the pressure of a woman watching.”

  My eyes widened, and I looked back at Dirk. “What in the hell did he just say, and when did he learn to use his words like that? Lincoln’s going to freak!”

  Dirk let out a roar of laughter. “Apple didn’t fall far from the tree.”

  I giggled. “I just said that to him not more than two minutes ago. That boy is exactly like his father.”

  “Hearts will be breaking all over Hamilton when that kid gets older.”

  I glanced back at Blayze and smiled. It was true. A mirror image of his daddy, he would certainly have the attention of girls everywhere.

  The next thing I knew, I was saddling up a horse and climbing on.

  Dirk and I rode in silence for a bit before he finally spoke. “You feel like talking about it?”

  I scoffed. “Not really.”

  “A guy?”

  My head snapped to my left, and I laughed. “You automatically think I cried over a guy? How sexist of you.”

  Dirk laughed. “Well, yeah. You’re a woman, and you chicks do shit like that.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Well, not that I agree with you, but it was over a guy, and I had a moment of weakness. That’s all.”

  “That guy wouldn’t happen to be Ty, would it?”

  This time I was positive my eyes nearly bugged out of my head and my mouth dragged along the dirt path we rode on.

  Dirk winked. “Your expression and lack of vocal response is my answer.”

  “You think . . . me and Ty?”

  He looked at me, his face serious. “Why do you think I always kept our relationship strictly in the friendship zone? I see the way Ty looks at you. I went down that road with Brock and Kaci once upon a time. I wasn’t about to do it again. I also figured at some point, Ty was going to get his head out of his ass and realize how much he liked you. He is a Shaw, though, and bound to fuck things up.”

  I forced my eyes straight and stared at the trail in front of us for a few moments before I spoke. “There’s nothing between us, Dirk.”

  “Okay. Do you want there to be something between the two of you?”

  Our gazes met. “Ty’s not looking for a relationship. I understand that.”

  I couldn’t stand the look in his eyes. It wasn’t pity, but it spoke volumes. He knew the truth, just like Lincoln did. I may have talked the talk, but that was about as far as it went. I was positive I had a sign above my head that blinked, I’VE FALLEN IN LOVE WITH TY SHAW.

  “Kaylee, I need to let you know something. The real reason I’m here in town, and it has to do with Ty.”

  He stopped his horse, which made me stop mine. “Is everything okay?” I asked.

  “Yeah, but I don’t think what I’m about to tell you is going to make you very happy.”

  My heart felt like it jumped to my throat. “Why would you say that?”

  Dirk rubbed the back of his neck while he struggled with what to say. Finally, he came out and said it. “CBS wants to offer him a broadcasting position on the Unleash the Beast Tour. He’d be go
ne . . . a lot.”

  “A broadcasting position?”

  He nodded. “They asked once before, but he turned it down.”

  “Why did he turn it down?”

  Dirk shrugged. “Only he knows why. He said he wasn’t interested at the time. I think he was still dealing with not being able to ride, and the thought of being near it all was too painful. But with him being at the PBR World Finals last November and reconnecting with some folks, they want him again. They asked me to bring him the offer, thinking with me being friends with him, he might take it a bit more seriously and give it more thought.”

  My eyes widened. “Wow. What do you think he’ll do?”

  He smirked. “That depends. Is there something going on between you two?”

  I swallowed hard. Then shook my head. “No. Nothing.”

  Dirk lifted his brows, evidently not missing the sadness in my voice. “Nothing?”

  “We slept together, but Ty told me the rules . . . he’s not interested in being in a relationship.”

  Both of our horses decided they were tired of standing there and started down the trail again.

  “You know he’s just lost in himself. I don’t really know any other way to explain it. Bull riding for Ty was exactly how it is for me. It’s my life, the dream I always envisioned I’d live. If it was ripped away from me like it was from Ty, I honestly think I’d lose myself as well. He thinks he’s broken and unrepairable.”

  I chewed on my bottom lip before I replied. “I understand that. I do. I don’t think he’s broken, though. I think he’s scared, but I saw something in his eyes when we were together, Dirk. A longing for something more, and I felt this connection between us. If I’m being honest, I think I felt it the first time he smiled at me. I don’t want to fix him, because I don’t think he’s broken. The man that he is, is the man I . . .”

  My voice trailed off.

  “The man you love?”

  I closed my eyes and shook my head before turning back to focus on Dirk. “Do you think if he took this position it would help him to let go of some of the pain and hurt he’s holding on to?”

  “Hell, I don’t know, Kaylee. I honestly don’t know. I think it’s more than just the bull riding. There’s something else Ty is holding on to. Something that makes him fear allowing something good to come into his life. Maybe he thinks if he’s happy, the rug will be ripped out from under him, and he’s not sure he’s capable of another sucker punch like that.”

  “And that is no way to live your life.”

  “I agree,” Dirk said.

  “If the roles were reversed and it were you in Ty’s shoes, would you take the CBS gig?”

  Dirk thought for a moment as the horses made their way down the path in a lazy trot. “Honestly, if it were me, and there wasn’t anyone holding me back, I’d do it. I’d want to be immersed in the world, because I fucking love it. But, at the same time, if I met someone who made me feel something I haven’t ever felt before, then that would change things. I may not want the type of life Brock has, but that doesn’t mean I don’t dream of it one day. One day . . . far, far away.”

  I nodded and smiled at the same time.

  “Listen. Stella and Ty Senior’s thirtieth wedding anniversary is tomorrow night. There’s going to be a big party. Why don’t you go with me, as my date?”

  Tilting my head, I gave him a hard look. “Your date? You do know I’m not sleeping with you, right?”

  He laughed. “Let me rephrase it—go with me as friends. It will be fun.”

  I didn’t want to tell Dirk that I had been secretly hoping Ty would ask me to go with him. It was stupid to even wish it, but I had let my silly heart dare to believe he might. It was tomorrow night, so the chances of Ty asking me at the eleventh hour were slim to none.

  “Tanner will be back in town. I was sorta holding out for him to ask me,” I replied with a wink.

  Dirk threw his head back in a fit of laughter, which in turn made me laugh. It felt good to laugh and smile.

  “Damn those Shaw boys.”

  “I’d love to go with you, but you do know it’s going to be fancy? Stella is going all out, and I’m the one who’s been in charge of getting it all put together. It’s formal.”

  “I heard that rumor. Looks like you’re starting to become quite the party planner in Hamilton.”

  Lifting my shoulder in a half shrug, I replied, “I have done a party or two.”

  He smiled. “Go with me, because it’s last minute and I don’t have a date. And considering you haven’t flat out told me no, I’m going to guess Ty still has his head stuck up his ass.”

  With a grin, I nodded and replied, “I’d love to go with you. Do you have a tux?”

  Dirk looked at me like I’d asked the stupidest question in the world. “Do I have a tux? You don’t know me at all, Kaylee Holden.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  TY

  “Kaylee has done an amazing job!” my mother said. Her eyes were dancing with happiness as my father smiled and looked around the ballroom of the Bitterroot River Inn.

  Tanner slapped my back and laughed. “Your girl sure does know how to throw a party.”

  I shot him a dirty look and replied in a hushed voice, “She isn’t my girl, so stop saying that.”

  Giving me a smirk, Tanner looked over to our parents and then back at me. “That’s not what Brock said.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Brock doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

  Our parents walked farther into the room as they went on and on about how beautiful it looked. It did look beautiful, and Kaylee had done an amazing job.

  Tanner bumped my arm. “From what he told me, you two hooked up together, and you stayed at her place all night.”

  “Jesus, is my sex life really the topic of your conversations with Brock?”

  “Not every conversation, but he did get me caught up on some stuff.”

  I glanced over my shoulder to give Brock a look that said he was getting his ass kicked as soon as this anniversary party was over. He caught my hard stare and frowned but then focused back on Morgan in his arms.

  A pang of jealousy hit me in the chest as I watched him with his daughter. I quickly pushed it away.

  “You want to tell me about it?” Tanner asked.

  “No. Go find your date and leave me the hell alone.”

  Tanner laughed and stopped to wait for Lindsey Johnson. She was his go-to girl when he came into town and needed a date.

  Lindsey walked in with Blayze and Lincoln, all of her attention on my nephew, who was turning out to be a lady’s man just like his father and uncles.

  “No date tonight?” Lincoln asked as she made her way up to me and stopped. She looked beautiful in the baby-blue gown she had on. It was sort of cute that Morgan’s little dress matched Lincoln’s. Another one of Kaylee’s ideas, I was sure.

  “Well, I had planned on asking Kaylee, but Brock informed me last night she had a date.”

  Lincoln raised her brow. “You were going to ask Kaylee?”

  I smiled. “Why does that shock you?”

  “Well, considering you had sex with her and then disappeared for three weeks, and then waited until the last night before the party to think about asking her . . . yeah, that would shock anyone.”

  “You never are one to mince words, are you, Lincoln?”

  “Not when it comes to the people I love.”

  I nodded. “Duly noted. Is she coming with Channing?”

  Lincoln gave me a little evil grin with a wink before turning on her heel and walking back over to Brock.

  “Women,” I mumbled as I made my way to the bar.

  “What can I do for you, sir?” the kid behind the bar asked.

  “Are you even old enough to be bartending?”

  He laughed. “Yes, sir. I’m twenty-three.”

  I bristled. Since when did I become my father? “Give me anything in a bottle, beer-wise.”

  The young kid nodded, t
hen handed me a bottle of a local craft beer. I took a drink as I scanned the room. Not many people were here yet, since the party didn’t officially begin for another twenty minutes or so.

  A flash of red caught my eye, and I damn near choked on my beer when I saw her.

  Kaylee.

  The dress she had on was off her shoulders and hugged her figure in all the right ways. It hugged the very figure I’d lost myself in just a few long weeks ago. When she walked, I noticed the slit that went damn near halfway up her thigh. I forced myself to swallow, feeling like I had a huge lump stuck in my throat.

  “She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” the bartender said, clearly seeing whom I was looking at. “Whoever she’s with is one lucky bastard.”

  I nodded, finished off my beer without looking at anyone else in the room but her, and then asked for another one.

  Before I had a chance to take a drink, though, I heard a familiar voice.

  “Better slow down, dude. The party hasn’t even started.”

  Looking over my shoulder, I smiled when I saw Dirk. “Aww hell, does Brock know you’re here?”

  He laughed. “Yeah, I stopped by earlier today to visit with the little family. Morgan is a doll and looks just like Lincoln.”

  I smiled. “Yeah, she’s a cute one. Blayze happy to see you?”

  Dirk nodded. “Yeah, I saw him yesterday, when he was over at the house practicing on Dad’s sheep for his big mutton-busting debut next month.”

  “Christ, Lincoln is going to pull her hair out with that boy,” I said with a chuckle.

  “Just like his daddy,” Dirk said, then motioned to the bartender. “I’ll have what he’s having.”

  I took another look around the room, searching for Kaylee, but I couldn’t find her.

  Once Dirk got his beer, we made our way toward the table that had been set up for family.

  “You come to town just for the party?”

  He smiled. “That was one reason. I’m here on business too.”

  “Really?” I asked. “What sort of business?”

  Dirk motioned for me to sit down at the table. No one was there currently. Brock and Lincoln had taken Blayze outside to the patio overlooking the small lake, and my folks were talking to the general manager of the hotel.