Ledmore Junction

by Ian Todd

  “Ye better make that five, Flintlock,” Johnboy turned and said tae him, as Paul McBride laughed at something the guy he wis talking tae whispered in his ear, before him and his wan-eyed collie dug made their way through the throng, a big grin spread across his face.

  “You took yer bloody time,” Paul accused him, as the baith ae them laughed, before gieing each other a big bear hug.

  Paul stood back, haudin him at ems length, looking at him.

  “Right, let me see ye. Aye, still a skinny ugly basturt,” he cracked, as everywan laughed.

  “Christ, that’s no still the same mutt that ye took doon tae Glesga wae the Duke’s daughter, is it?” Johnboy asked him, as Wan-eye, still looking like a pirate, looked up at him, his tail wagging.

  “Wan-eye? Aye, he’s still leading me astray. He’s a bit greyer roond the gills noo, bit he hisnae slowed doon. He’s still upsetting aw the local gamekeepers,” Paul said, winking, getting chuckles oot ae them.

  “Paul, this is the people Ah wis telling ye aboot o’er the phone,” Johnboy said. “Flintlock, Ewan, Findlay? This is a good pal ae mine, Paul McBride. He’s originally fae Glesga, bit he’s been upsetting people up here since 1969. Paul’s wan ae the main guys fae the Highland Crofters Association, so he is.”

  “Please to meet ye, laddie,” they aw chimed in, shaking his haun.

  “Look, there’s a spare table gaun. Let’s grab it before somewan else moves in,” Paul suggested, as they aw followed him across and grabbed a seat on the bench oan either side ae it. “Johnboy here telt me oan the phone that youse hiv aw been getting hassled fur a while noo, by wan ae the local landowners. Is that right?”

  “Ach, we’re not the first and certainly won’t be the last, laddie,” Flintlock agreed. “I’m quite sure there are others in here far worse off than us.”

  “The main problem for us is that, although we own parcels of land, there’s not enough to make a living from it. The big local landowners, who are mostly absentee landlords, would rather give it away to outsiders for free, than allow us locals to get our hands on it,” Findlay spat.

  “Aye, it’s still a big issue across the whole ae the Highlands, despite years ae campaigning fur better legislation. There’s been wee shoots ae change recently though. The government his recently agreed that tenant crofters, who’ve been working the land, should hiv the first right tae buy option, if any ae the landowners put their estates oan the market. As usual, the legislation’s full ae flaws though. The main wan being that the landowners hiv goat thegither and agreed no tae break up the estates before they go oan the market, so price the wee guys oot ae the market. There’s always a foreign buyer ready tae move in and grab the land. Everything’s done behind the scenes as a gentlemen’s agreement. Challenging it is still a grey area and so far, hisnae been tested. Johnboy telt me a wee bit ae whit’s been happening in your situation, bit being a toonser, he’s obviously no goat a clue, so maybe ye’d like tae tell me whit the score is wae youse across in Assynt, while he goes up tae the bar tae get us another pint, eh?” Paul suggested, as everywan nodded their heids.

  “Hoi, Ah’m noo a respected landowner masel, so Ah am. Ah’ve goat a hunner and seventy acres worth nothing, bit it’s still ma wee piece ae paradise, so it is. Same again?” he asked.

  Johnboy sat listening tae the conversation fur the next hour and a hauf. A lot ae it wis o’er his heid, bit he goat the gist ae whit Paul wis telling them.

  “So, what can the likes of The Highland Crofters Association do fur the likes of us, laddie?” Findlay asked him.

  “There’s a lot ae people, crofters, like yersels, that hiv wee parcels ae land scattered across the highlands. Take Johnboy as an example. His hunner and seventy acres should be mair than enough tae make a living aff ae…if it wisnae barren and wis in the right place, that is. The fact that it’s barren puts people like him, the wee guy, at a total disadvantage and at the mercy ae the big estates surrounding his croft. It’s far mair difficult fur tenant crofters, because they cannae alter the tenancy agreement withoot the permission ae the landowners. Bit fur guys like youse, there’s room tae breathe…if youse kin persuade yer sons and daughters, who expect tae inherit the wee parcels ae worthless land some day, tae think oot ae the box in relation tae inheritance expectations. Noo, whit Ah’m aboot tae say may seem obvious, bit it’s been pretty challenging tae put intae practice due tae historical infighting, family politics and unrealistic expectations. We’ve been encouraging people tae focus oan how best tae work thegither fur the benefit ae everywan. Fur example, if youse wur tae consolidate the acreage youse own individually intae a bigger collective parcel, then ye’re talking aboot a different ball game aw thegither. Hiv any ae youse heard ae the co-operative movement?” he asked, smiling at the blank expressions staring back at him. “Ah’ll take that as a naw then. Some people, maistly in the cities, club thegither and set up whit they call co-operatives, where the produce and the profits ae their labour ur shared equally amongst a membership. In the cities, where there’s a bigger market fur whitever they produce, it makes it an attractive alternative option, as opposed tae beavering away oan their ain as sole traders. That’s fine up tae a point, bit co-operatives, like everywan else, still fall foul ae restrictive legislation and ur victims ae aw sorts ae tax liabilities. There’s a better alternative that’s been aroond fur a long time though, that we think could be exploited by people like us. Whit we’ve been daeing fur a wee while noo is encouraging wee land owners like yersels tae become non-profit making community trusts. That’s no tae say that ye’re gonnae be making massive profits aw ae a sudden, bit there ur advantages, particularly in the way the tax works. A community trust basically works in the same way as a family trust. That’s why aw the big estates in the Highlands hiv been operating under the auspices ae family trusts. It’s a tax scam where the government allows the wans wae the money tae haud oan tae it legally, subsidised by wee guys like youse. So, if youse wur tae club the wee bits ae land youse hiv intae wan bigger piece, it means whitever profit ye dae make, goes back intae the trust. The beauty here is that before declaring any profit, youse ur able tae take oot any running costs incurred, as well as pay yersels a living wage oot ae it. Anything left get ploughed back intae the land…or the community trust, hence the non-profit making part ae the deal which isnae liable tae the tax that everywan else pays.”

  Silence.

  “By setting yersels up as a community trust, it means the land becomes the property ae the community as a whole, overseen by a group ae trustees oan behauf ae the community, which in your case, wid be youse and yer descendants, efter ye’re gone.”

  “What about our houses, laddie? My family have lived in our crofthouse for nearly two hundred years,” Findlay said.

  “Aye, well, ye’ve jist hit the nail oan the heid, so ye hiv. There lies the problem. That’s always the first question people ask, particularly the next generation who traditionally inherit the family home and the land it sits oan. This is the part that people cannae get their heids roond, despite successful examples surrounding them oan their ain doorstep in the form ae the big estates. If people, families, still want tae retain ownership ae their hooses that isnae an issue. It’s the land we’re talking aboot here. While setting up a community trust means the land cannae be solely inherited by the sons and daughters, it also cannae be taken o’er by unscrupulous ootsiders like Johnboy here, even if it is worthless. It means that, if any ae youse died, the family couldnae sell it aff tae unscrupulous land management companies like Galbraith’s, who’ve been land management factors fur the gentry fur hunners ae years up here. Another good point is that if any ae youse wur tae fall intae debt, the land couldnae be impounded and sold tae recover that debt by the sheriff officers. Plus, as Ah’ve awready mentioned, the tax incentives ur phenomenal, so they ur, making it possible fur wee guys like you tae actually maybe start making a living fur a change. Yer family kin furget paying crippling death duties oan the value ae the land, which is usually t
he final nail in the coffin ae struggling wee crofter’s families, who kin barely survive in the first place, withoot hivving tae pay that aff before they inherit. That’s how a lot ae the big landowners hiv built up their land portfolio o’er the years. They wait until a wee crofter like youse die aff and the family ur forced tae try and sell aff the land tae pay aff the death duty tax. A community trust wid protect the families and allow them tae stay and work oan the land in perpetuity. It’s basically playing the same game wae the tax man and government that aw they rich gentry folk hiv been daeing fur years. Ah suppose it’s a wee bit like a poacher turning gamekeeper,” he said, as everywan smiled. “Look, it wis Johnboy that brought your situation up o’er the phone and suggested that ye might want tae hear whit Ah hid tae say. Ah’m no sitting here trying tae sell youse anything. This is jist a wee introduction tae a different concept ae operating that ye might want tae think aboot fur the future.”

  “Where about in the Highlands are these crofter community trusts operating successfully?” Ewan wanted tae know.

  “There isnae any. This is a whole new ball game fur people like us, so it is. So far, nowan up here his bitten the bullet. It’s a difficult concept fur people tae get their heids roond, who hivnae gone tae the best schools and universities, paid fur by Daddys’ family trusts, who hivnae paid taxes fur hunners ae years. As Ah awready said, it’s certainly no fur everybody. A lot ae people Ah’ve spoken tae hiv expressed an interest, bit it’s trying tae persuade family members, particularly the young wans who see their inheritance, the family croft, as their right. Look, Ah’ve brought some leaflets and other stuff wae me in the boot ae the car, that ye kin take hame wae ye tae read at leisure. It’ll explain the benefits and complications ae gaun doon a community trust route. Ah kin always come and talk tae youse any time ye want. Also, Johnboy here his agreed tae become the local volunteer rep across in Assynt fur the Highland Crofters Association, so ye’d hiv somewan local picking up oan any issues and problems as they arose. Whit Ah’d suggest is that ye aw, including you, Johnboy, become members ae The Highland Crofters Association in the first instance. It’ll only cost ye a few bob a year tae join. We kin then officially help ye wae a lot ae stuff, including accessing cheap insurance, specifically set up fur wee crofters like us, legal advice, as well as help youse tae establish a community trust if that’s the road ye want tae go doon.”

  “Aye, you’ve given us a lot to think about, Paul. I couldn’t promise anything, but I’m sure we’d like to learn more about it,” Ewan said, as the others nodded.

  “Right, well, there’s a lot oan the day. Ah know Ewan and Findlay here want tae go and catch up wae Iona and Arlene and Flintlock here wants tae hiv a wee donder aboot the place before the sheep sale starts,” Johnboy said, looking at his watch. “Why don’t we get back thegither in aboot an hour fae noo? Me and Paul here hiv a lot ae catching up tae dae, so we hiv.”

  “Fine, laddie,” Flintlock said, as everywan agreed, staunin up.

  “So, Johnboy, you and Senga finally managed tae jump o’er the broom handle thegither then?” Paul turned and said tae him, as they baith laughed. “This’ll be good.”

  “Anyway, enough ae the lassies and whit The Mankys hiv been up tae. Whit’s been gaun oan in your life?” Pearl asked, sitting doon oan the grass, gasping again, looking across towards The Western Isles. “Oh Senga, it’s stunning, so it is.”

  “Aye, Ah feel so blessed. Who wid’ve thought somewan like me, fae a wee tenement in Taylor Street in the Toonheid, wid’ve ended up in a paradise like this?” Senga agreed, joining her.

  “Well, Ah wid’ve. This is aw ye’ve spoken aboot since we wur weans…plus, you and Johnboy hiv made it happen thegither, so youse hiv.”

  Silence.

  “Whit?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Senga, Ah might no hiv seen or spoken tae ye since the end ae March, bit that disnae mean tae say Ah don’t recognise when something’s bothering ye,” Pearl challenged her.

  “It’s no jist the winter storms that ur gathering, Pearl,” Senga admitted, leaning forward and wrapping her cardigan tightly roond her knees. “It’s Johnboy.”

  “Whit aboot him?”

  “That’s the point. Ah’m jist no sure.”

  “Ye’re no sure? Whit’s that supposed tae mean?”

  “It means exactly whit Ah’ve jist said.”

  “Whit? Ye don’t love him?”

  “Of course Ah love him. Ma feelings hivnae changed in that regard. It’s jist that he’s still daeing his ain thing, even up here.”

  “Like whit?”

  “Like, he hisnae come oot ae himsel. He’s still a closed book, so he is. He only lets ye in oan his terms. Christ, hauf the time Ah don’t know whit the hell’s gaun oan in that heid ae his.”

  “Ah’m sorry, bit Ah’m no wae ye. He disnae get violent wae ye, dis he?”

  “Naw, don’t be stupid,” she replied, laughing. “It’s strange, bit every time Ah look at him, Ah’m no convinced that he isnae up tae something.”

  “Like whit?”

  “Ah don’t know…things,” she shrugged.

  “Whit, wae other wummin?”

  “Up here?” she laughed. “Naw, Ah doubt if he’d ever be unfaithful, even if it wis put oan a plate in front ae him. It’s jist that we wur supposed tae be up here tae get away fae aw the ducking and diving that goes oan in the toon and whit did Ah discover? He’d been in touch wae Donna The Prima Donna. Before Ah knew whit wis gaun oan, there’s a bloody private dick wandering aw o’er the place and noo you turn up. Who’s gonnae be next…Tony Gucci?”

  “Senga, believe you me, fae where Ah’m sitting, ye’ve goat everything ye’ve every dreamed ae and mair, so ye hiv. Christ, Ah’d gie ma right erm tae hiv hauf ae whit ye’ve goat here, so Ah wid.”

  Silence.

  “It’s no aw been a bed ae roses, so it hisnae. We’ve hid a lot ae hassle trying tae settle in up here. Jist when Ah felt we wur getting there, the shit started hitting the fan.”

  “Fae whit Ah understaun, this so-called local big-shot wis trying tae get youse oot ae the hoose and Johnboy wis only trying tae sort the situation oot by phoning Donna and asking her tae buy the hoose oan behauf ae the baith ae youse. Fur whitever reason, Johnboy didnae want this Robert Hamilton wan tae find oot that youse hid bought the place. Fae whit Ah’ve found oot aboot this guy, it wis probably the smartest move at the time. Wan thing’s fur sure, Robert Hamilton will rue the day he tried tae mess wae somewan like Donna Jeffs, so he will,” Pearl said, shivering.

  “Bit that’s ma point, Pearl. Don’t ye see? He bloody well went and bought the crofthoose behind ma back, withoot telling me. Ah telt him when he goat oot ae the jail that Ah wisnae prepared tae be treated like some wee caged hoosewife. Despite that, he jist went ahead anyway. He wis well warned that oor relationship hid tae be based oan trust…openness.”

  “So, wur you no keen in buying the place like?”

  “Of course, Ah wis keen, bit that’s no the point.”

  “So, whit is the point then?”

  “Ah’ve jist telt ye. The point is, he went aff and arranged tae buy the place withoot first speaking tae me aboot it. Ah’m sorry, bit Ah need tae be able tae trust the person Ah’m in love and living wae…whit?”

  “Look, Ah’m no laughing at ye, Senga and no trying tae make excuses oan his behauf. Put yer feet in his shoes fur a second. Johnboy goat oot ae jail last October. Whit wis that…roughly eleven months ago? Before that he’d spent three years in jail, hauf the time in solitary confinement, before suddenly being plucked up oot ae the blue and released, via a wee stint in The Royal. No long efter that, a couple ae months, he gied up his best pals tae move oot ae the toon tae be wae the person that means everything in the world tae him.”

  “So?”

  “So, that’s a lot ae life changes in under a year. Ye don’t think ye’re maybe being a wee bit hard oan him?”

  Silence.

  “Ah found a handgun…up the loft,
when Ah wis storing some empty boxes, so Ah did.”

  “A gun, whit kind ae gun?”

  “Ah don’t know…a gun. He claimed it arrived up here in wan ae the boxes we took fae the flat in Otago Street.”

  “So, where is it noo? It’s no still in the hoose, is it?”

  “Naw. Ah made him get shot ae it. Ah think he flung it aff ae this very cliff,” she said, as they baith leaned forward and peered doon intae the foaming mass below.

  “Well, wan thing’s fur sure. If that’s where it went, it’s lost furever, so it is.”

  “Ah don’t think ye fully appreciate where Ah’m coming fae, Pearl. Remember, Ah worked practically every weekend in casualty fur years, while you wur up in Elgin. Christ, even noo, Ah cannae staun the sight ae blood. Look whit happened tae Wee Mary? Who could’ve imagined that happening tae somewan as innocent and as sweet as her…and fur whit?”

  “It could’ve happened tae any ae us, Senga. Even Issie’s accepted that. Who wis tae know that The McGregors wid be aroond at Tony and Kim Sui’s auld flat when Wee Mary and her boyfriend, Cheesecake, went roond tae pick up an ice bucket?”

  “Naw it couldnae hiv, Pearl. If Donna Jeffs hidnae plucked Wee Mary oot ae school early, she widnae hiv been caught up in the world ae The Mankys. Ah mean, let’s get real here. Deep doon, none ae us lassies wur that surprised efter first Joe, then Peter and Snappy, ended up murdered…at least, Ah wisnae. Poor Jean telt me that she used tae sit at night, every night, freaking oot, wondering if Peter wis gonnae walk through that door unscathed. Ah jist wisnae prepared tae put up wae that kind ae shit. Johnboy knew that.”

  “The toon’s quietened doon a fair bit since The Capstan Club goat bombed back in February, so it his.”

  “Really? Christ’s sake, Pearl. Ye’ll be telling me next that Tony Gucci and the rest ae The Mankys hiv aw suddenly turned intae altar boys.”

  “Well, considering Simon Epstein and Jake McAlpine ur Jewish, that’s a non-starter fur a start,” she said, as they baith looked at each other and smiled. “Whit Ah’m saying is that Ah don’t get the impression that they’re as involved as they probably wur, particularly oan the violence side ae things. Even they goat a wakeup call. The run in wae The McGregors shook them up pretty badly, so it did. Aw the lassies believe that tae, including Donna. Efter the war between Wan-bob Broon’s cronies and The McGregors exploded in the toon, life did eventually get back tae some semblance ae normality fur people, so it did. Of course, gangster types ur still turning up, shot or clubbed tae death up dark alleyways and the wee Neds in the hoosing schemes ur still running amok, stabbing each other maist weekends, wance they get full tae the gunnels wae firewater. Christ, it widnae be Glesga if things like that didnae happen. People like me wid be oot ae a job if it wis any other way.”