by Orr, Krystal
Nothing.
Talliea's mind continued to work in an effort to find an answer that would appease the many questions she had. Her clan had believed they were the first to reach the Northlands. Even if another had somehow made it before hers, that would not explain how Arizira could have an Esu parent. She was nearly thirty summers old. Thirty summers ago, the Esu clans had all lived in the south. Small skirmishes were common, but war had not broken out until a few years later.
"Please say something."
The small voice brought Talliea back to the present. She shook her head again and allowed her eyes to refocus. Arizira had covered herself back up and was watching her reaction. She had seen Talliea's faraway expression, her furrowed brow, and her obvious discomfiture.
She was disgusted.
Arizra sighed and moved to back away. Tears blurred her vision. She had worried about this reaction and it seemed as if she had been right in that feeling. Talliea felt differently about her now. It was obvious.
"Stop," Talliea begged, grabbing at Arizira's middle to keep her seated next to her.
"This upsets you. Your feelings...they lessen."
"No. That could never happen, love. This news surprises me. It confuses me, but it does not change the way I feel about you. I do not love you because you are Arnira, just as I do not love you because you are Esu. I love you because you are Arizira Ahmanae."
Arizira did not comment on the fact that Talliea said her first name without difficulty.
"I love you for everything that makes you who you are. Your kindness. Your gentleness. Your strength and your devotion. I love you for all of these and more. But, I do not understand how this can be true. There were no Esu here so long ago."
Sighing, Arizira suddenly realized how tired she was. Thinking of the task of retelling Cynra's story to her was daunting. There was so much Talliea needed to know, so much she did not know about her own people and their history. Arizira and Talliea may have shared a common people, but their clans were radically different.
The clan her mother hailed from did not treat their women like property. They were not intent on power and war-like displays. If Cynra's words were to be taken as truth, D'jiira's clan was peaceful and enjoyed art, philosophy, and spiritual pursuits.
What had happened that had divided the two groups? Why were the stories about the evils of Esu society preserved in tales and song while the similarities with the Arnira were lost?
Staring into Talliea's questioning eyes, Arizira felt overwhelmed as another question entered her mind: How had Talliea come into such awe-inspiring powers? Did they come from D'jiira's clan?
Cynra had told her that Talliea had always been destined to acquire such abilities, that it was her love for Arizira that allowed her to present such displays.
The powers of both Aitla and Esuval.
That was what Cynra had told her. That Talliea would wield the powers of both deities through her. It made sense to her now. She was a child of both night and day; a blending of both peoples, both gods. She allowed Talliea to tap into such abilities. But, how?
There was too much to sort through, too many questions, too many tales to tell. Arizira had only just come around. Though Talliea had helped to take away much of her weariness and the aches and pains that had still been present, she had not been able to completely make Arizira feel whole.
Complete.
There was still something missing and it was that one thing that left her feeling beside herself.
"I am tired, Tah-li," she said beginning to feel the effects of recent events. There had been a lot of excitement in the very brief amount of time she had been awake. Cynra and Taetylona's presence was still a mystery as were Talliea's powers.
What had happened to each of them still needed to be discussed, their plans had to be spoken of, revelations needed to be expressed and the nature of everything they, respectively, had learned was overdue to be brought to light.
A small flash of disappointment colored Talliea's eyes before she forced a small smile to her face and helped Arizira to lie back down.
"Of course. We have all the time in the world to talk."
She moved away from Arizira. The other woman had only a thin cloak and blanket to offer her any comfort. She looked over Taetylona and Cynra's bags and belongings in hopes of finding another blanket.
"The blanket you made for me? Where is it?" she asked Arizira over her shoulder.
Arizira, lying down flat on her back and staring up at the ceiling of rock, turned her attention to Talliea. Everything that had happened so recently was catching up to her. She could not say she was sleepy, but she was tired and feeling fatigued. Her mind was starting to feel muddled and hazy again and there was still so much to talk about.
"The Dream Speaker last possessed it," she said slowly.
Talliea continued to rifle through the bags. She could feel Arizira's eyes boring into her back and the gaze only served to make her search all the more frantically. She realized that for the last several days, she had been going almost nonstop.
When she had been with Markahn, she had refused to stop and rest very often. Her only goal, her only desire, had been to keep walking. To press forward. To find Arizira.
Thinking of the man caused her to wonder about his whereabouts. She did not recall him from the clearing and did not believe he had been present when she had unleashed her powers. She hoped he had made it to relative safety. He had been kind to her and without him, she would never have gotten away from the Esu.
Arizira shuffled, scooted behind her and brought her back to her train of thoughts. She still felt like she needed to keep going. Even though Arizira was with her, the need to keep pressing ahead was ever present.
She felt that if she stopped, the reality of everything would make itself known. She would awake from her perfect dream and her renewed happiness and realize that Arizira truly was gone and that she was forever alone.
If she kept busy and continued to go, continued to plan and take action and look ahead, then she would not have to deal with the possibility that her mind had finally snapped due to her distress.
“Tah-l,." Arizira called to her.
Talliea inhaled deeply and glanced at her love from over her shoulder. Arizira was sitting up, her left hand holding the cloak over her chest. Her eyes appeared tired and Talliea suspected they mirrored her own.
The both of them had been going for so long without one another that, now that they were together, it was hard for both of them to fully relax. They seemed to have forgotten how to be them amidst all the chaos.
"Come lie down with me. We will sleep and when our eyes find the world again, we will discuss our future with clearer minds and lighter hearts."
Talliea hesitated a moment. She could not sleep. There was too much to think about. The Esu and Arnira could both be searching for them. They could be regrouping and planning attacks against each other.
What if Bela'luin was looking for Arizira? Li'nas Dei was an Arnira location, known to every member of Arizira's tribe. What if one of them thought to come to the cave for guidance and found them instead?
Lao'dahn had been incapacitated when Arizira had shot him, but Talliea did not believe him to be dead. His obsession with her would never die and, now more than ever, he would be intent on finding her. She no longer feared him as she once had. Her newfound powers would ensure nothing happened to Arizira or herself, but she still was not comfortable with the possibility of being caught unawares.
No, no. She could not simply lie down with Arizira and allow the outside world and its problems to fall away. As much as she would like to, she could not. Her body was too tense. Too much had happened the last couple of days to allow her to relax.
"Tah-li?"
Arizira's voice insinuated itself between her troubled thoughts. She allowed her eyes to focus as she studied her love's face. Lightly glowing blue eyes stared back at her. Silver-gold hair framed an angular face with perfect features and full l
ips. A delicate fair-skinned hand was reaching out for her.
What am I doing? Talliea thought to herself.
Her Arizira was alive. She was with her once again and was reaching out to her. For her. Why was she not showing her how much she had missed her? How much she loved her? Suddenly, the absurdity of their situation came to her mind.
They had been separated for two months, one of them thought to be dead and lost forever. Instead of rejoicing as much as they should at their reunion, they had eaten potaf ula and talked about Arizira's parentage.
They were both so silly.
It appeared that in all the craze, the two of them had forgotten one simple fact: they were together again and they were in love.
Certainly there was much to talk about, but were they not allowed a small amount of time to just enjoy one another without the Esu and Arnira? Without questions concerning Talliea's abilities or Arizira's parents or when their baby would arrive?
Talliea smiled as she stopped her frantic search and turned to face Arizira. Slowly, she walked over to where her love lay and sat down beside her. Her hand took Arizira's as she laid down on her side next to her. Arizira scooted closer and nuzzled her neck, their conjoined hands breaking apart so that Arizira could tangle her fingers into dark hair.
In that moment, laying next to one another in a familiar setting, Talliea allowed herself to forget about all the bad things that had happened to each of them. For just a few hours, she wanted to be able to enjoy Arizira's presence. She wanted to forgo any lengthy conversations or have to answer any heavy questions.
She just wanted to be with her love. With the powers she wielded, they would both be safe.
She tilted her head down and brushed her lips across Arizira's forehead. Her right hand pushed its way into silken hair and held the back of Arizira's head. A calm began to settle around the two of them. Panic, fear, and the responsibility to be what others needed them to be seemed to fade away.
There was only them.
Talliea felt the most tender of kisses against her throat. "I have missed you."
It was a soft whisper of a confession. Talliea smiled upon hearing it. The longer she laid next to Arizira, the more she began to feel the weariness still present in her love's body. She had not healed it completely. Arizira's nose trailed up the front of her neck before her lips kissed the tip of her chin. Talliea looked down into eyes that had always fascinated her and smiled.
She was with Arizira again. The other woman was no dream. She was no illusion or figment. She was here and she needed Talliea.
Talliea chastised herself for getting so caught up in other matters and not allowing herself to truly enjoy what being back with Arizira meant to her. Her right hand brushed hair away from her love's face before her fingers traced the contours of her cheeks.
"Ari," she started in a shaky voice, "I am so afraid of losing you again. I am afraid to be happy with you."
There. She admitted it.
Arizira shook her head. Her small hand in Talliea's hair tightened. "No, failira, do not be afraid. We have a lot to discuss, but take pleasure in knowing we are together now and nothing shall ever separate us again. I am here with you."
Talliea smiled at the words, though she had heard the lassitude present in Arizira's voice.
"You are tired, love. Something is still missing for you," she said, kissing Arizira's forehead.
"I just want to lie here with you, Tah-li."
Slowly, an idea began to form in Talliea's mind, a solution. From whence it came, she could not say. It felt right and true as it guided her. A serenity came over her. Her inner turmoil lessened and matters became clear. She knew what she needed to do.
Gently, she pushed Arizira onto her back until she was looking down at her. Arizira stared up in slight confusion. Her hands rested on Talliea's arms.
"Do you remember when you were injured before?" Talliea asked softly.
"Yes."
Talliea smiled, suddenly calm as she felt her power beginning to come to her aid. "You believed I had healed you."
Again, Arizira nodded. "Yes."
Tan fingers moved down Arizira's chest and easily removed the cloak separating their bodies. Those same fingers glided across skin that had once been marred. Light followed. A pleasant sensation coursed through Arizira's body.
"Tah-li?" The name sounded more like a moan than a question.
Talliea dropped her head so that she could kiss Arizira. Her lips were soft and the taste of mint came to life on them.
"I can heal you again, Ari," she said placing small kisses over Arizira's face. Her fingers moved and circled a suddenly tight nipple. The same pleasant sensation passed between their bodies.
Arizira closed her eyes. Her breathing quickened. Though she wanted to do what she thought Talliea was suggesting, she did not believe she possessed the strength required.
"It will feel good, love," Talliea pressed. Her lips had moved and were placing small, wet, caresses along Arizira's neck. Her fingers were still guiding Arizira's nipple to a tighter and tighter bud.
Arizira could feel her body responding. It had been so long since the two of them had come together in such a way and never with Talliea leading the encounter. Arizira could not deny her excitement or her intrigue. Talliea's powers were still taking some getting used to on her part and she was unsure how exactly her lover planned to heal her.
As if in answer to her unspoken question, Talliea pulled away from her slightly. Once Arizira's eyes reopened, she smiled and said, "When we bond, we share our ourselves with one another, love. You can take from me what you need and I will give you what I can. I will stabilize you."
Arizira's brow furrowed. "How do you know this?"
"I am not sure. These thoughts just come to me. They lead me."
Silence.
"I need this, Ari, and so do you. Let me heal you and make you feel good."
Arizira took a deep breath. She did not believe her body would allow her to be so strenuous, but she could not deny the look in Talliea's eyes. The sensations caused from the light Talliea was invoking were incredibly distracting and soothing. She wished for nothing more than to forget the world and its troubles and to lose herself completely in her love.
What if Talliea was right and the act brought her fully back to herself? Arizira did not wish to lie around feeling so helpless any longer than she had to. There were events taking place that held the potential to radically change things. Them. Their peoples. History.
Arizira could not aid her loved ones feeling as she currently did. She and Talliea deserved this time together. They deserved to share in a moment that was just for them. As she arched her back to get closer to Talliea, she realized how much she had missed the other woman and how much she needed to feel her again.
Her fingers wrapped around the hand bringing pleasure to her breast. She closed her eyes as her hand guided Talliea's. A kiss landed on her lips before she felt her failira moving to straddle her hips.
"I love you" was whispered across her lips.
Arizira smiled and allowed herself to become lost to Talliea.
Chapter 15: An Avenue of Healing
Arizira sighed in contentment as she welcomed the warm and comforting weight of Talliea's body. Talliea's thighs were spread across her hips and her arms were resting near her head. A small kiss landed on Arizira's lips and she smiled at the tenderness.
"Hi," Talliea whispered softly. Another kiss landed on Arizira's chin. "You are so beautiful."
Arizira's smile widened. Talliea was taking her time to reacquaint the two of them. Both of them had been without the other for two months. They had been in pain. They had been confused. They had been lost. Each of them had been through their own personal hell and, now that they were once again where they belonged, Talliea was intent on expressing her emotions completely. To her, there was no rush.
Despite the looming war, despite others' hatred, and despite anyone who wished either of them harm, all that
Talliea cared about in that moment was Arizira. She desired for her love to be complete and whole. She wished for Arizira to experience everything she felt.
Her love. Her devotion. Her respect and her loyalty.
"Hi," Arizira responded before another light kiss fell upon her lips.
Talliea smiled happily at her and leaned down until their chests connected. She ran her nose along the soft underside of Arizira's chin and neck, her lips leaving delicate and reverent kisses on the skin she found.
Arizira closed her eyes and tilted her head back. Her hands moved and wrapped themselves in Talliea's thick hair. She held Talliea closely to her and allowed herself to forget about anything existing outside of Li'nas Dei.
All that mattered was the two of them. She turned her head until Talliea was forced to look back up at her. The two of them stared at one another for long moments before they came together in a familiar, but long since experienced, kiss.
Nothing was held back. The kiss was not chaste or sweet or one meant to comfort. It was a kiss shared only between lovers. It was passion made manifest; the physical expression of two hearts' emotions.
Arizira, her strength still ill, moaned heavily into Talliea's mouth. She felt a tongue glide hotly across her own and she opened her mouth to deepen their embrace.
Talliea leaned forward, her weight braced on her arms which still rested by Arizira's silver hair, and kissed her love more deeply. With every moan from Arizira, every beautiful sound of encouragement, Talliea grew more confident, more bold. The sensations slowly forming inside her body were new and exciting. Feeling Arizira beneath her was a rush she could not explain.
Her love was completely submissive to her. She trusted her with everything she was and her only form of communication in that moment was with her body. Talliea pulled back to calm her breathing. She could feel Arizira's chest rising quickly as she fought to steady herself. Two small hands continued to massage her scalp and the tingling sensations that traveled down her spine only begged her to continue.