Prescription for Desire

by Candace Shaw

  She breathed in deeply. “When Howard was killed, I was pregnant with twins. Soon after, I suffered a miscarriage because I had fibroids, and they were growing right along with the babies.”

  “Oh, Raven … I’m so sorry.” He kissed her forehead. “Did you have the fibroids removed?” he asked, touching her stomach. While it was flat overall, she still had a slight bulge that showed up when she didn’t work out on a regular basis or ate too many bad carbs.

  “No wait. The pill could be making them worse.”

  She shook her head. “There’s no more fibroids and no pill. I just told you that because I didn’t want to tell you all of this—”

  “Wait, I’m confused.”

  “About a year after the miscarriage, I decided to have the Uterine Fibroid Embolization procedure to shrink the fibroids because I was considering using a sperm donor. Anyway, I’m one of the small percentage of women that could go through early menopause after having an UFE. I haven’t had a cycle in two years, but I knew the risk I was taking. I figured I’d be fine because I was a healthy thirty-something-year-old woman.”

  “Well, maybe it’s PCOS, or …”

  “You forget I’m a gynecologist. I don’t have PCOS or any other infertility issue. My best friend, Taylor is a fertility specialist in Atlanta and tested me for every possible issue.”

  “Baby, I’m so sorry. I had no idea. Did your husband know about the babies?”

  “Only my mother and Taylor know any of this, and now you.”

  “Have you thought about adopting?”

  She chuckled sarcastically. “I tried last year, but I didn’t qualify according to the agency because I’m single with a demanding job that requires me pretty much on call all the time. Babies don’t deliver themselves, and they come at anytime during the day or night. I even suggested a live-in nanny, but that was out of the question. Honestly, I’ve moved on from that part of my life. I’m almost forty. What would I do with a baby now?”

  “Love it and be the amazing mother I know you’d be.”

  She touched his face, and he kissed the palm of her hand. “You’re so sweet. Thank you for listening to me.”

  “Of course, babe. That’s what I’m here for. You know you can tell me anything. I’ll always be here for you, Raven. Always.”

  She sighed and nestled her head on his chest. Always was only three more weeks. Didn’t he realize that?

  Chapter Nine

  “All right, boys and girls. When we’re on the van, we’re going to use our inside voices,” Raven said. Ten of the children from the orphanage were lined up in twos on the porch. Raven and Armand had volunteered to chaperone the group on a field trip to The Children’s Museum, an experimental museum where the children could use interactive displays that would allow them to make believe they’re doctors, teachers, and broadcast journalists, as well as other professions.

  Loading the back of the van with their lunches, Armand glanced up and smiled. Their eyes met briefly, and a knowing look passed between them before she placed the focus back on the children. Raven definitely had a way with them. Whenever she came to the orphanage they bombarded her like they did him. Especially Isabella and Israel, whom he was pleased had taken a liking to her.

  Their conversation about her miscarriage had played in his head for the past two days. He’d hated that Raven had to suffer through it without her husband, or even the rest of her family knowing. He was surprised she hadn’t told anyone else in her family, but Raven was the type to keep things bottled in. Probably because, like him, as the oldest you have to appear to be the strong one. He was glad she confided in him, though. It seemed to have brought them even closer together. She no longer had that faraway look in her eyes, and he hoped he had something to do with it.

  In less than three weeks she was leaving. The thought tightened his heart. Even though they hadn’t known each other long, he felt a connection with her that he couldn’t explain. Now that he knew her deepest secret, all he wanted to do was to protect her from any other hurtful episode in her life. But how could he do that thousands of miles away?

  “Ready?” Raven asked, sticking her head out of the passenger’s side window, jarring him from his thoughts. “All of the kids are buckled up.”

  “I’m ready, co captain,” he said enthusiastically, walking around to the driver’s side. “Qué comience el espectáculo!” Let’s get this show on the road!

  The children cheered as he settled into the fifteen passenger van owned by the orphanage. Once he turned the ignition on, Raven reminded the children of using their inside voices. Armand’s mind wandered again as he glanced over at Raven, who had decided to keep the children entertained by reading the classic children’s book Verdi, by Janell Cannon. It was the story of a baby snake that loved his yellow skin so much that he didn’t want to grow up and become green.

  Armand was impressed with how well Raven got along with the children. She sort of reminded him of his own mother: loving, but firm. Raven had to snap at two of the boys earlier for arguing over a toy. She immediately nipped it in the bud, and before long was playing catch with them. Afterwards, she braided Isabella’s hair into a French braid and placed little pink bows down it. He’d also noticed that, like his mother, Raven was carrying a huge tote bag containing bandages, peppermints, wet wipes, and Kleenex, which was the total opposite of the little Prada purse she usually carried.

  His heart ached at the thought of her never having her own children. She was compassionate and nurturing. Why shouldn’t she be blessed with children? She was a strong woman, and even though she said she’d moved on, he was sure a part of her would always long for a baby.

  Once they arrived at the museum, they decided to stay together instead of splitting into groups as originally planned. While the children played make believe in the different stations, Raven and Armand took pictures for Maria, who loved scrapbooking everything the children did.

  “Having fun?” he asked Raven, who was sitting on a bench near the kitchen center where some of the girls were pretending to make dinner.

  “Oh yes, and the kids seem to be having fun as well.” Her eyes scanned the area and she waved at some of the children in the hospital station. They were wearing scrubs and stethoscopes. It reminded him of when he used to dress up as a doctor when he was a little boy, pretending to take care of his parents and sisters.

  “Can you imagine someone with this many children?”

  “Angelina and Brad come close,” she replied. Standing, she took a picture of the children in the court room where Israel presided as a judge. “And Josephine Baker.”

  He nodded. “Maria told me today that adoptions are pending for Ramona and Jose. They may both be gone by the end of next week.”

  “Well that’s good.” She showed him the picture she’d taken, and they both laughed as Israel kept banging the gavel on the stand. “Any news on the twins?”

  “No. They’re such great kids, but some people don’t want to adopt two children and Maria refuses to split them.”

  “Hmmm … that’s too bad, but at least Maria is honoring their grandmother’s dying wish. Isabella and Israel are so close I would hate for them to be separated.”

  “I guess you and Cannon are close.”

  Her smile widened. “Yes, we’re very close. It was just us until Sean was born when we were four years old. I love all of my siblings equally, but Cannon is my confident.”

  He hesitated. “And yet he doesn’t know your deepest secret?”

  She sighed wistfully. “No. He was away in New Guinea on a missionary trip when it happened. He flew in for the funeral and left the following week. I didn’t want to interrupt him again because I knew he would’ve dropped everything and flown back. However, I think he knows something, but he doesn’t question me. Although, he gave me a dog upon his return.”

  “Awww … yes, your precious Sahara.”

  “Yep. She’s my girl.”

  Isabella ran over in a white doctor’s coat,
wearing a stethoscope around her neck and carrying a thermometer. “Look, Dr. Arrington. I’m a doctor just like you.”

  “Yes you are, precious,” Raven said, giving the little girl a big hug. “Are you going to listen to my heartbeat?”

  “Yes.” Isabella placed the ear buds into her ear, and Raven set the stethoscope on the appropriate place. “Your heart is beating perfectly, Dr. Arrington.”

  “That’s good to know, Dr. Isabella. Let me fix your hair. The bottom of the braid is coming loose.”

  They stayed an hour longer before heading to a nearby park that had picnic tables. There, they ate their box lunches, which Raven and one of the volunteers had made that morning and packed in the ice coolers. After lunch, the children played for an hour before it was time to head back. On the way, most of them slept from being worn out from a long day.

  An overwhelming peace arose in Armand as he glanced at Raven, who was also dozing, and his eyes wandered to the rearview mirror to observe the children. He’d figured one day he would settle down with a wife and kids, and now sitting next to Raven with the children in the backseat made him even more aware of his future. It had always been in his plans, but first he wanted to work with organizations such as Doctors Without Borders and Doctors Unlimited. Being a military brat, he was used to traveling around every three or four years to different places and having to make new friends, or going for months without seeing his father who was a Lieutenant General. That was a life he didn’t want for his own family.

  Even though he had just met Raven, a part of him could actually see himself with her and a brood of children. Maybe not ten, but definitely three or four. Unfortunately, with her unable to become pregnant, he guessed that wouldn’t be possible. However, he couldn’t imagine himself without her despite the fact that she was leaving in a few weeks. Not being able to have a baby wasn’t a deal breaker considering there were other options.

  “Wake up, sleepyheads,” Armand said as he turned into the driveway. After getting the children settled in the house with some of the staff, he and Raven retreated to the huge family room where oversized bean bags and treats were set up for a movie night.

  Laughing, Raven crashed on one of the bean bags.

  “What’s so funny, babe?”

  “It’s been a long day. Whose idea was it to do movie night?”

  “Um … yours,” he reminded her, settling on to a bean bag. “You picked the movie, remember?”

  “Yep, and you’re going to love my choice.”

  An hour later the children were back downstairs in their pajamas, eating fugazzeta and watching The Lion King. Isabella had snuggled up next to Raven after Mufassa died.

  Armand leaned over and whispered to Raven, “Why didn’t you tell me the father was going to die?”

  “Are you crying?” she asked softly, wiping her own tears and handing him a Kleenex.

  “No … but you still coulda pre-warned a brother. That was cold-blooded what Scar did to his own flesh and blood.”

  “Just watch the rest of the movie.”

  A few hours later, after all of the children were tucked in, Raven and Armand bid their good-byes to Maria, who was grateful for their assistance that day.

  “I’m so sleepy and I know you are.” She rested her head on his shoulder, and he placed a tender kiss to her forehead. “Are you going to be okay on the drive back?”

  He patted her knee as he started the truck. “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine. Besides, we aren’t going back to Ghilaua tonight.”

  She sat up with a questioning expression. “We’re not?”

  “Nope. Since you haven’t officially toured Buenos Aires, we’re staying at the Marriott Plaza Hotel and touring the city tomorrow.”

  “Oh, Armand, that’s wonderful.” She placed a kiss on his cheek and settled back on his shoulder, sitting back up a second later. “Wait, I didn’t pack any clothes or toiletries.”

  “Don’t worry, my dear. I got that all covered. When you’re with me, you never have to worry about a thing.”

  *****

  Armand was definitely right. When she was with him, she didn’t have to worry about anything. Since he’d entered her life, Raven’s mind was clearer and things of the past, while still somewhat hurtful, were easier to deal with. He had given her a new outlook on life, and she couldn’t be happier. She just hoped that when she left, while it would be bittersweet, she could easily move on. However, the thought of not seeing Armand ever again tugged at her heart that was just starting to fully heal.

  Once they arrived at the hotel, they took a bubble bath together in the huge soaking tub in the presidential suite. Raven rested between his legs, her back relaxing on his sturdy chest as the warm water and his hands gently massaged her breasts. He leaned over and placed a few tender kisses on her cheek.

  “Comfortable?” he asked, wrapping his arms around her waist and his legs around hers.

  She sighed. “Very. I could stay here forever.”

  “I wish you would.” He kissed her affectionately on the neck. “You think Arrington Family Specialists could find another Ob-Gyn?”

  “Um … no,” she giggled. “I’m a majority owner now that my parents have decided to fully retire, but they do help out sometimes.”

  “Hmmm …” He shifted under her and tightened his grip. “So have you hired someone to take their place outside of the Arrington family?”

  “We’ve discussed that. Mom is a primary care physician, so that position is definitely needed even though we’re all board certified as such. Except for Sean, of course. Shelbi has changed her focus to cardiology, which added years onto her residency. We never really thought about what would happen when our parents retired, but hiring outside of the family has to happen now. Cannon is holding off until I get back because we’re the decision makers along with my dad, but he’s pretty much a silent owner … well, he’s supposed to be.”

  “Hmmm …” he said again. Raven wondered if he was even listening to her ramblings, or if he was dozing off. It had been a long day so she figured he was tired.

  “Armand?”

  “Yeah, babe?” He yawned and moaned softly in her ear.

  “Are you awake?”

  “Wide … awake,” he answered sleepily, running one of his hands down to her clit and circled it with his finger which sent a warm current through her.

  “You were nodding off.” She turned over to face him, resting her chin on his chest.

  “Nope. I promise you I heard everything you said, beautiful.” He swiped a tendril of her hair that hadn’t found its way to the curly mess of a ponytail sitting on the top of her head. “Tell me something. What’s the one thing you want more than anything in the world?”

  “Is this a world peace pageant kind of question?” she asked with a sarcastic undertone.

  “No, seriously. I just want to know. Who knows? Maybe one day I can give it to you, or do it for you.”

  “You’re so sweet, you know that?” She took one of the chocolate-covered strawberries from the plate on the bathtub and popped it in his mouth.

  He chewed the strawberry, and gave her one in return. “I’m a grown ass man,” he said with extra bass in his voice and a passionate suck to her neck. “I’m not sweet.” He popped her butt, and she let out a hearty laugh.

  “Okay, Dr. I-cried-during-Lion King. Whatever you say.”

  “I didn’t cry, but that was very sad what happened. I’m just glad at the end Simba came back to fight for his family and his throne.”

  “Mmm hmm.” She winked and straddled his lap, swaying her hips back and forth on his erection under the water. While Raven did appreciate his question, she knew he couldn’t give her what she wanted most in the world, so she needed a distraction.

  “All right, woman.” He squeezed her butt and meshed his erection against her. “You keep teasing him, and we won’t be leaving this bathtub anytime soon.”

  She moved her hips up, and slowly lowered herself on to him, sliding down eac
h thick inch as she leaned over to kiss his twitching face.

  “Damn, girl. You’re … so wrong … for this.” He slid his hands to her breasts and squeezed them gently before taking one in his mouth.

  “Just sit back and relax. You’ve had a long day.”

  He licked his lips and pulled her down to kiss him. “Good. I’ll let you do all of the work … for now.” He winked, and tried to push her hips all the way down on to him, but she continued to move up and down. At first she was going at a steady pace to not splash water out of the tub, but the more she felt his hardness, that idea flew out the window and the water blew out the candles.

  Armand began to meet her thrusts, sitting all the way up so that she was straddled on top of him with her legs wrapped around his waist. A tidal wave of emotions crashed inside of her, unraveling all of her pent up desire for him. Screams of pleasure overtook her, and she could barely catch her breath as she held onto him, panting in his ear.

  “You okay, baby?” he asked as she trembled in his embrace while her orgasm shot through her so hard she almost fainted from its impact.

  “Mmm … .mmm …” she moaned, burying her head into his chest as he slowed down and gently bounced her on him, kissing her neck softly.

  “You feel so good, baby, you hear me?” he whispered in her ear.

  “Yes, Armand. It’s your turn now.”

  Raven finally came down from her high and sped up their pace, pushing him back toward the bath pillow. He grasped her hips, holding on to her as she continued to make love to him until he shuddered inside of her. He held her close to his heaving chest, and she could feel his pounding heartbeat against her skin.

  “Are you okay, baby?”

  He chuckled. “I’m fine.”

  She eased up off of him, but still straddled his torso. “I think it’s safe to say that half of the water is on the floor.”

  “Um … yes, and as soon as one of us gets out of the tub to turn on the light, we can clean up.”