Dazed

by Katie Hauenstein

  Though my window was dimmed for the night, I could still see the green light of the Space Needle faintly. A reassurance that all was well and I was safe to fall asleep. Knowing I would see Peter in the morning, I closed my eyes and began to drift to sleep.

  Chapter 12

  Just as I was about to give in to sleep, my brain turned back on and I remembered the book I had promised myself earlier I would put away later. Later had come and gone and I had forgotten. I knew it could wait until morning and that I could even have a housekeeper take care of it, but I was particular about the organization of my twenty-first century history books. Everyone knew it, too, so no one dared touch them.

  Sighing, I rolled out of bed and left my room. My Guard was surprised to see me up and out again, but said nothing. It wasn’t completely unheard of for me to make my way to the library late at night. He followed me as I made my way to the fifth floor Core, down the stairs, and back to the library.

  Grabbing the book without looking or stopping as I entered the library, I hustled to the spiral tree stairs on the right of the room and climbed up to the fourth floor of books. The ladder was where I had left it earlier when I took the book from the shelf, so I knew it would be a quick trip to and from the library.

  Tucking the book under my arm and holding it in place with the same hand, I climbed the ladder single-handedly until I could reach the twelfth shelf. As I balanced my feet on the rung I stood on, I let go of the ladder momentarily to take the book from under my arm and put it back where it belonged.

  “Oh, Rose,” I heard my name drawn out and it startled me. At the same time that I gasped, I lost my balance and windmilled my arms desperately to stay on the ladder, to no avail. I didn’t even have time to process that I was falling before I did, and was caught in someone’s arms.

  I let out an ugly “hoomph” as I landed and panted as my heart raced. The person who caught me was laughing and that was when I realized who it was.

  “Count Peter Juniper! You scared me nearly to my death! Put me down!” I slapped his shoulder and he put me down, still laughing and still holding my waist.

  “Oh, come now, Rose. What was scarier, my voice or falling off the ladder?” Peter asked as he took my hands and tried to look at my face.

  Irritated, I looked up at him and shrugged. “Falling off the ladder.”

  He moved his hands to my hips and pulled me closer to him. I crossed my arms. Mother was right about one thing: he never took anything seriously; apparently not even falling off a ladder. “And I caught you, right?”

  I huffed. “Right.”

  “So, technically speaking, I saved you more than I scared you.” He was smugly grinning at me now with his straight white teeth and disarming smile.

  I unfolded my arms and put my hands on his shoulders. “How is it possible that you can so easily talk yourself out of trouble with me?”

  Peter brought his lips to mine and kissed me briefly. “I’m devastatingly charming and handsome.”

  I laughed. “And so humble, too.” I leaned my head against his chest and hugged him. Even though we saw each other only a couple nights before, the ball was so formal and it had been very long before that. “I missed you, Peter. How did you find me up here?”

  He put his cheek on my head. “I’ve been hanging out in the library since I got here. I figured you would make your way here sooner or later.”

  I smiled and pulled back to look at him again. Even though we only got to see each other every couple months, he knew me so well. While I hadn’t known Peter as long as I had known Ella or Stephan, he and I had clicked the first time we danced at a ball five years ago. Beyond his aforementioned smile, chocolate brown eyes, and wavy blonde hair, there was something about him that pulled me to him.

  His joking smile turned into a genuine small one. Pressing his forehead against mine, he muttered sincerely, “Sweet tree blossoms, Rose. I’ve missed you, too.”

  Suddenly remembering that I didn’t put on a robe, I jumped, hitting my nose against his chin. We both said, “ow” at the same time. As he removed his hands from me and rubbed at his chin, he asked, “What is it?”

  Rubbing my nose, I stuttered, “I – Well, you see –” Then it all came spilling out at full-babble speed. “It was just supposed to be a quick trip to and from the library. I didn’t expect to see anyone, much less you, so I didn’t bother putting on a robe and it’s really, really hot, so Marie laid out just a little gown thingy so I wouldn’t roast overnight, so now I’m just a little embarrassed at how much of me is showing and – ”

  Peter put a finger to my mouth to stop my verbal waterfall, grinning the whole time. “I promise not to look at anything but your face for the rest of the evening.”

  “Thank – hold on. What do you mean ‘for the rest of the evening,’ Peter?”

  He laughed. “I didn’t look up when you were on the ladder, if that’s what you’re worried about. However, how could I resist looking at your long legs and lithe arms?”

  “I’m five-four, Peter. How long can my legs really be?”

  He shrugged. “They’re lovely all the same.”

  I rolled my eyes, but couldn’t help blushing as I pointed at him. “Alright, Peter. I can’t fault you for that. But no more. You be a gentleman.”

  He nodded and joked in a snooty voice. “Yes, of course. I must prepare myself for the King’s Test.”

  Though I had been smiling with him, my smile quickly faded and I looked down. “Why did you have to go and bring that up?”

  He tilted my chin so I was looking at him. I was very sensitive about the King’s Test. I didn’t feel it was fair for my choice of a husband to be taken from me. At least I was able to talk the Council out of their idea to have the participants comprised of foreign princes to create an alliance between nations. While I personally didn’t mind one way or another, I really had no option either way, I knew there was a faction in Arboria that wasn’t fond of the idea. As I said before, Father had been so certain they would be for it, he had already contacted several Kingdoms about the idea; some were not very happy about the cancelation of the plan.

  A tear fell from my eye before I could stop it and he wiped it away with his thumb. “I’m sorry, Rose. I didn’t mean to spoil our meeting. Please forgive me. I’m sorry.”

  I sniffled most romantically and we both laughed. Blinking away my tears, I told him it was alright and kissed him. Pulling away, he held my hand and we climbed down the tree stairs of the library.

  When we left and walked slowly up the stairs of the Core and back to my room, the Guard once again followed at a respectable distance. I knew he wouldn’t say anything to anyone. Marie had told me my night Guard and day Guard were both very trustworthy and loyal gentlemen and that was enough for me.

  We said nothing as we crossed the Core and climbed the spiral stairway. The Guard took his post when we made it back to my room and Peter gave me one more kiss before I said good night and entered my room.

  Letting the door slide closed behind me without a second glance, I quickly walked over to my four-poster bed and laid down on top of the blankets again. This time I grabbed one of my extra pillows and squeezed it.

  Yes. Life is good.

  I took a final deep breath and fell asleep for the rest of the night.

  Chapter 13

  “What kind of fun plans do we have today, Rose? Deciding the color of the flowers for your Birthday Ball?” Peter was joking with me at breakfast with Ella and my family.

  Stoically, I responded, “Actually, Peter, that is on my to-do list for the day. I am really looking forward to your opinion on such an important matter.”

  Peter’s face blanched and I laughed, which made everyone else laugh as well. “I’m kidding with you, Peter. That is something I am going to do today, but I was planning on bringing Ella with me. We will also be looking for the wedding in a few months. You are welcome to join us for it, of course. The flower fields are always beautiful this time of year.”
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  Peter put both hands up in surrender. “I think I’m going to pass on that one, but I’d love to sit in on your tutoring session. It’s so much fun to push Doctor Bartholomew’s buttons.” Peter’s eyes glinted with mischief.

  “You’re welcome to join me, but it is my final lesson, so we will have to pay some attention to him or he’ll get cross. Ella, will you be joining us for that?”

  Ella shook her head and snorted. “No thank you. I think I will help Aunt Amoura with anything she needs for the upcoming ceremonies instead.” In other words, she had no desire to listen to Doctor Bartholomew pontificate on important Arborian traditions or ancient history.

  During all of this, my parents were sitting next to each other watching us with giant smiles on their faces. I think it made them glad to see me happy rather than stressed out of my mind.

  Looking up when I heard the door to the Dining Hall slide open, I saw the palace Steward come in. Though I expected him to walk to over to Father, he came to me instead.

  “Your Highness, Count Stephan Oak has holocommed for you and is waiting for you to answer.”

  “Excellent. Please put the comm through to my office.” I ignored the googly eyes Ella made and the curious glances from everyone else at the table. Placing my napkin down and standing up, I excused myself from the table and walked to my office. I sat down at my holostation and answered. Stephan’s image popped up in front of me; he ran his hand through his light brown hair when I answered and gave me a smile that stretched all the way to his eyes.

  “Hello, Stephan.”

  “Princess Miriam, so nice to speak with you,” he said in an oddly formal voice.

  “So nice to speak with you, as well, Count Stephan,” I said, mimicking his tone and formality.

  He looked down and laughed realizing how ridiculous he sounded. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sorry, Rose. You wouldn’t believe the pressure being put on me here at home about the King’s Test.”

  “Of course not. I have no stress here at all,” I said sarcastically and crossed my arms playfully.

  He laughed again and folded his arms on the desk in front of him. More serious, he said, “I’m sure you’ve heard the people talking. To be honest with you, it is making me feel a little uncomfortable with you. Almost like I’m not sure how to be with you anymore. I mean, the other night – ” I grimaced, expecting an apology. “No. I’m not apologizing for it. It was just so –”

  He can always read me so well.

  I smiled. Stephan’s honesty was always something I appreciated. “– different,” I finished for him. “Yes, I’ve been hearing the latest gossip.” There had been dozens of broadcasts from different stations on the holocomm discussing the nature of Stephan and my relationship. Arboria was definitely in love with the idea of us being in love.

  I folded my arms on my desk and leaned forward a little. “But nothing needs to change between us, Stephan. It’s not like we’re at the end of the King’s Test right now.”

  “No, but the closer it gets, the more nervous I become.”

  Maybe I misread him the other night.

  I looked down at my hands. There was an awkward silence. I broke it. “You know, Stephan. If you don’t want to participate in the King’s Test, it’s alright. I will not be offended. I’ll understand, in fact. I know we have always had a sibling-type relationship with each other and the change in our status is – interesting.” I shrugged. “You have every right to be able to choose the woman you marry.”

  Stephan sighed. “That’s why I’m so nervous, Rose. Out of all the women I know, you are by far the most intelligent, kind, loving – beautiful one. I’m not sure there is anyone else I would want to marry.” I looked up at him.

  “Oh.” It was all I could say through my shock. This was certainly not the conversation I thought we would be having. Stephan and I had been best friends for as long as I could remember, but I never knew he felt this way. I looked at my hands in front of me again. I vocalized the thought. “I had no idea you felt that way.”

  “I wasn’t going to tell you. I haven’t told you already because I didn’t think it fair for you to have my feelings on your mind during the Test. I do not want you to feel any obligation to me because of who I am and how I feel. I just – I couldn’t keep it to myself anymore. Not after the other night. Not when it’s quite possible we’ll be married in only a few short months.”

  “No. I mean, yes, it is quite possible, but no, I don’t feel any obligation. I am glad you told me.” I tried to give him a genuine smile, but inside, I was screaming.

  I’m already confused from the other night. Now – this? He wants to marry me? Does that mean he loves me? What else could it mean?

  If my parents caught wind of this and it somehow ended up being Stephan and Peter in the final two, Father would choose Stephan for sure, regardless of my opinion. The fact that I might not mind perplexed me.

  He smiled back and sighed. “Good. Well. I’m glad to get that off my chest. I’m looking forward to seeing you in a few days, Rose.”

  “You, too, Stephan. Have a good day.”

  “You, too. Bye.” He disconnected.

  “Bye,” I said after his image had already disappeared.

  Chapter 14

  I was quiet during Ella’s and my trip to the flower fields. Actually, I was pretty quiet the whole visit. Marie was with us and took notes on which flowers we liked and she said she would take care of placing the order when we returned to the palace.

  It didn’t take Ella and me long to figure out which flowers we would use for my Birthday Ball. Most of them would be roses, as everyone surely expected. When we were finished, we had another quiet ride back to Evergreen Palace. Although it had not taken long to choose the flowers, traffic had been unusually terrible and it caused me to be late for my tutoring session.

  With everything else going on, I didn’t want to meet with Doctor Bartholomew. I already achieved my Mastery in Arborian History, as was required of all heirs to the Crown. There was really no reason for him to insist on this final meeting before declaring me ready to become Crown Princess, besides his own arrogant stubbornness.

  At that moment, I was more concerned about the new developments with Stephan. Why was I not opposed to his affections? I knew I loved Peter, but there was something new stirring inside me for Stephan. Is that why heirs weren’t supposed to get into relationships before the King’s Test? Because it presented all kinds of confusing situations and emotions?

  As Ella walked me up to the tutoring room, she stopped and said, “Alright. Spill it, Rose,” exasperatingly when we were about halfway there.

  Not realizing I had zoned off or had been as quiet as I was, I shook my head to bring myself back to reality and smiled at her. “It’s nothing, Ella. Don’t worry.”

  “It’s not nothing. You’ve been all out of sorts since you got off the comm with Stephan earlier. Is he not coming after all?”

  “Oh, no. He’s coming.”

  “Then what?”

  We had reached the second floor at this point and I stopped short of leaving the Core steps. Quietly, I told Ella, “He’s in love with me.”

  “What?!” She did not respond quietly and I shushed her. Now at a whisper, she said. “He’s decided to tell you this now?”

  I nodded and continued walking. “Well, he didn’t so much say he is in love with me. He said he didn’t want to marry anyone else and he couldn’t keep it to himself anymore with the possibility of marriage looming in the near future. Who knows how long he has felt this way.”

  “Geez. I can see how that would put you out of it. Are you going to tell Peter?”

  I sighed. “I don’t know. I haven’t decided yet. I probably should.”

  “I agree. He has to know what he’s up against. Before, it was just Stephan, but Stephan in love? He’s going to be tough to beat.”

  “Yeah, especially considering the fact that I’m not sure how I feel about it.”

  Befor
e she could respond, we arrived at the tutoring room. Peter was waiting outside, leaning on the door with his arms and legs crossed.

  Tutting, he said, “Doctor Bartholomew is not going to be happy, Rose. You’re late.”

  I released Ella and gave him a hug. “He will be alright.” Pulling away to look at him, I said, “I need to talk to you after we’re done here, alright?”

  Furrowing his brow, he said, “Alright. Is everything alright?”

  “I think so. I just found out some information I think you should be privy to.”

  He nodded and offered me his arm, which I took. Ella and I waved each other goodbye, as Peter and I made our way into the room.

  “Princess Miriam, Count Peter. How lovely for you to finally join me,” Doctor Bartholomew said with a twist of insincerity in his voice.

  I laughed as Peter and I sat on the sofa opposite his desk. Peter had been right, of course. Doctor Bartholomew was very unhappy. However, when he tried to look angry and intimidating, he never really pulled it off. He ended up looking like an unhappy cat.

  “I’m sorry, Doctor Bartholomew. I had an unexpected comm regarding the upcoming King’s Test, then flower shopping went long. It won’t happen again.” I smirked at my joke and Peter pursed his lips to stop himself from laughing.

  Doctor Bartholomew wagged his finger at me and smirked in return. “Very funny, Princess.” He wasn’t that much older than me, only ten years, but he sometimes behaved like he was as old as my parents.

  Entwining his fingers on his desk, he jumped right into our final lesson. “Do you remember what caused the creation of our kingdom, Princess?”

  I rolled my eyes. “Are we really going to discuss this? It’s basic history that anyone older than ten in the kingdom should already know.”