He laid down on the bed and pulled me down with him. He was on his right side facing me, he turned me on my side to face him and held my hand. Our noses were nearly touching and for a second, I thought I saw lust in his eyes, but it was only sorrow.
Chapter 22
Aiden
“When I was 5 we lived in Florida. We had only lived there for 2 years. Dad moved us around a lot for work. I had a nanny who would bring me to and from school, but dad insisted she lived in the same apartment building as we did, so she would always be there in case he was late home. He was always worried about me being on my own. One night he got me from her place. It was quite late. I had been asleep on her couch when he turned up, so he picked me up and brought me home. He got me into bed and tucked me in when his phone started ringing. When he answered I could hear a voice, but he didn’t say anything. He just hung up and went to the front door and bolted it. Then the loud banging began. They were shouting to open the door. I got scared and I started to cry. Dad came over to me and picked me up. He told me I needed to be brave and quiet. That I need to hide where he’d shown me before. It’s funny I still remember it word for word. When we moved into this new place my dad showed me this trap door hidden in the office. There was a rug on top. I thought it was great. I would often play in there. I even kept toys down there, but it wasn’t fun anymore. He took me over to the office looked at me and told me not to come out. It doesn’t matter what I heard. I must not leave the hiding place. Bolt the lock and they won’t know I’m even there. Wait till long after the noise has stopped, then go next door to Emma. She’ll keep me safe. Then he told me to run.
I ran as fast as I could to the office room and pulled up the door. I could hear the front door start to crack, and they burst through. I could hear them shouting ‘stop right their guardian’ and ‘don’t move a muscle’. I jumped into the space under the floor, closed the door and bolted it. One of them said find the other one. I thought they were coming for me. I heard them questioning my dad, but he never answered them. Then I heard a thud and I started to shake knowing I was next. I listened to them talking. ‘What the fuck you do that for?’ ‘We need the other guardian.’ ‘He’s just knocked out. When he wakes we’ll get the info and finish the job.’ ‘Search this place! I want to know where she is.’ I didn’t understand at the time who she was. Obviously now I know it must have been mom. I’ve been going over it a lot lately.”
I could see tears forming in her eyes for me. She put her hand on my cheek.
“That’s when they said. ‘We need this done before they spawn more devils.’ And now that makes sense. I guess we’re the devils.” I winked at her and she laughed.
“I waited and waited. I heard them tearing our home apart. I don’t know what they were looking for, but they didn’t find it. They left with my dad. I could hear them dragging him across the floor. After that there was just darkness and silence. All I could hear was my heart pounding, I couldn’t move or breathe. I didn’t know how long I was down there staring into nothing. I heard Emma shouting after a while. She was shouting for my dad. I’m guessing she saw the blood as I could hear her screaming, but I couldn’t move. She must have heard me as next thing I know she’s pulling me up and out of the hole and carrying me. She asked me what happened, but I didn’t know. As she carried me out I saw the aftermath. Our home destroyed, books everywhere, furniture broken and ripped, and then I saw the pool of blood on the floor. I tried to look away but looked straight at the blood smeared all the way out the door where they dragged him away. I felt numb I couldn’t talk. I think I fell asleep because when I woke I was on Emma’s couch. I couldn’t feel anything, but I could see Emma talking to two police officers. I could hear more people outside the door. Then it sunk in. I screamed, and I sobbed. The policewoman came over and cuddled me. She told me everything was going to be OK and asked me to tell her everything that happened. I told her what I could, but it didn’t help. They never found who did it and I never saw Emma again. They took me to the police station and waited for social services to get me.”
Evelyn was crying, and I hadn’t noticed but I was tearing up as well. She put her hand on my cheek and wiped away the tear. The way she was looking at me made me wanted to kiss her. She was up against me now, so close I could feel her chest rising and falling against mine. As her breathing became heavy I moved my hand down to her waist, but she moved back. I knew I shouldn’t have done it, but it was just us. No one would know. I pulled her back to me. I needed this. I couldn’t help myself.
“Aiden what are you doing.” She was panting.
I could feel her attraction now, she wanted this. I moved closer and ran my hand down her hip and thigh. I could feel the goose bumps on her leg as I lifted it over my hip and pulled her tight against me.
“Aiden… please... stop.” I knew she was excited. She moaned when she felt me hard against her. I moved my hand across the top inside of her thigh and I could feel the vines again. I could almost feel them humming at my caress, dancing under my hand. I traced them with my fingers closer and closer till I felt the rim of her underwear, but I didn’t want to stop. I wanted to feel all of her.
“Please, please stop.” She was begging me, but she wasn’t pushing me away. Our foreheads were pressed together. All I had to do was move a little closer and she’d be mine. When I looked into her eyes she looked excited but scared. She looked vulnerable. Then I remembered what Jake said to me. That I was taking advantage. I pulled away. I felt ashamed of myself. The guilt was killing me. How could I have put her in this position?
“Evelyn I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have done that.”
She wouldn’t look at me. She was crying into my pillow. I got up and walked out. I couldn’t look at her. I had fucked up.
Evelyn
His hands were on me moving down my body. I wanted them there. This was wrong. I tried to pull away. I asked him to stop but I didn’t want him to. I’d gotten too close and couldn’t stop this. Feeling him against me was turning me on. I wanted him to kiss me. I started throbbing with pleasure as he pulled my leg over his and pushed up against me. He was moving his hands from my thigh up my inside leg until he was almost touching me. I’d never felt pleasure like this. I wanted him to go further. My head was telling me it’s wrong, but my body wasn’t listening. I asked him again to stop. I couldn’t do this with my brother. Our faces were so close I could almost feel his lips on mine. I could feel tears falling down my cheek onto the pillow. I was crying because I had never felt this happy. Then he pulled away from me. Tears came heavier now. He started apologising and I could hear the regret in his voice. I cried harder into the pillow as he left me alone. I heard him walk away down the hall, and I ran back to my bedroom and locked the door.
I felt humiliated. I wanted to leave but how? I didn’t know where Aiden was, and he wasn’t going to let me go. I quickly got dressed and looked out into the hallway, but he wasn’t there. His door was still open, so I guessed he hadn’t come back yet. I sneaked into his room and looked out to the car. I could see Aiden sitting on the hood. His head was bowed, and his hands were pulling at his hair as he was rocking back and forth. His head was so messed up by what we did, maybe he wouldn’t find me. As soon as I thought this, my dogs looked up at me and barked, and then Aiden looked up at me. I was high up, but he could see I was dressed now. He stood up, but I didn’t want him near me. Now Cer turned around to him and growled. Good boys I thought as the other two did the same. They knew what I wanted and did as I said. I knew Aiden wouldn’t hurt them, but they would hurt him if they had to. He probably thought I was just angry at him, so sent the dogs to scare him. I took my chance and bolted out the door and through the fire exit staircase I saw on my way in. I felt faster now. I got to the ground in seconds and I ran out the emergency exit at the back not realising I’d set off every alarm. Now my grand escape was being broadcast, so I ran faster than I’d ever done before. I was going home, and no one would stop me.
Once I
got onto the road I held out my hand hoping someone would stop for me. Luckily there were a lot of lorries coming down this road and one pulled over. Just as I was about to get in I could hear Aiden screaming my name. When I looked he was running straight for me with my dogs in tow.
“I’m sorry.” I shouted back to him and I closed the door and the truck pulled away. I watched Aiden stop and drop to his knees. I felt the thud as he hit the ground.
“Whoa what was that?” I heard the lady sitting next to me saying. I was so clueless. I hadn’t even seen who stopped, but lucky for me it was a man and a woman.
“Felt like an earthquake tremor to me.” The man said to her.
“Oh, honey what are you doing out here at this time? It’s dangerous.” Yes, and they were probably in danger now too.
“I’m sorry I’m just trying to get home.” I told her.
She was in her mid-50s with wild red hair. She had a lot of make up on and seemed like a very loud person, whereas the man had a southern accent and was dressed in plain overalls. He didn’t seem very interested in me.
“Where’s home?” She asked. Where was home? I wasn’t too sure myself of where I was right now.
“Where are we?” I asked her, but she looked confused.
“Now? We’re in Mississippi heading to San Antonio. My husband and I are finishing our last route, then were having a second honeymoon there.” She said perkily.
“I’m going to New Orleans.” I told them.
“Well stay with us then don’t want you getting into any trouble we go through New Orleans we’d be happy to drop you off there if you want?” She offered.
“Yes please.” I was very grateful.
It wasn’t home, but I knew Caitlin would turn up at some point. Hopefully before Aiden did. I could explain to her why I was doing this, tell her the truth about my feeling for Aiden and that I just wanted to be with my mom now. I had to tell someone, and I hoped she’d understand. I was starting to feel tired again. I wondered if I was getting ill or something, but I could feel a tugging in my stomach. It was Aiden’s pull. He was trying to connect with me. No, it was worse, he was following me. He was using our connection as bread crumbs to find me. I tried to push him out and close myself off, but I was so tired he just latched on again. I used the last of my energy to close the connection hoping it would stay closed. At least for a while so I could put some distance between us.
When I woke up it was bright outside and the lady was shaking me.
“Hun, we brought you to the French Quarter. I hope that’s ok. You were so tired we couldn’t wake you to find out where to go.”
I looked around and recognised it straight away. I thanked them both a lot and jumped out of the truck. I didn’t have far to walk to reach the hotel, and I could still feel Aiden calling out to me. He probably knew where I was now, but he felt far away so I had time. I walked into the hotel but there was no one at the desk, which was probably best. I didn’t know if they were here or if they even checked in with their real names. I walked down the hall and went up the stairs to the room Caitlin and I had been in when we first came here. I knocked on the door and heard someone moving inside. I started to feel a little panicked, but when the door opened I almost cried.
“Evelyn?” Eli stared at me in shock.
“Eli!” I jumped into his arms.
I was so happy to see him, and he hugged me tight. I fought off the urge to push him off me. I needed this. I started crying as he brought me into the room and sat me on the bed.
“What happened? You’re not supposed to be here for two more days.” He said sitting on the opposite bed.
“I had to leave. I can’t go on like this anymore. I’m going to go to the agents and end all this. It’s pointless.” Eli got me some tissues and I wiped away my tears.
“What are you talking about? You can’t give yourself up.” He said.
“But I want to.” I said back to him, and he knew I was serious.
“They’ll kill you.” He said as he held onto my hands.
I could feel the fear forming in my stomach. I should never be alone with men. Which is why we probably come in twins, so we wouldn’t be alone. I looked into his eyes and they looked clouded.
“Where’s Caitlin?” I asked, but my voice broke a little.
“She’s down at the restaurant. She’ll be back in a minute.” I could see Eli’s eyes flickering back to normal.
“Shall we go join her?” I asked trying to stand up, but he still had hold of my hands.
“You’re so beautiful Evelyn. Did you know that?” The look in his eyes was back, but I needed to stay calm.
“Eli this isn’t you.” I said to him.
“I’ve loved you since the day I met you, but you’d always recoil at my touch. Not now.” He was tracing his finger up and down my arms.
He was right. Since meeting Aiden I’ve been able to handle it a lot better, but that didn’t mean I wanted him to.
“Eli please let me go” I said as he was looking me up and down with the same look every other guy did in this situation. I knew it wasn’t his fault, it was mine. I didn’t want to hurt him. He was my friend.
He put his hands on my waist on the hem of my hoodie and started trying to pull it up. I let him. Maybe if I do this I can let go of Aiden and he can hate me forever. This is what people do. They have boyfriends and have sex. They don’t usually want it with their brother and Eli was my friend. He wasn’t hurting me. He was being slow, gentle, almost savouring it. Under my hoodie I only had my strappy top on, and when he looked at me he smiled sweetly. He adored me, I wanted to like it, but my body flinched.
“You know I love you Evelyn. I had to tell you at the cabin before you left me again. You know I always have loved you. I’ll look after you I promise. I know you’ll love me too.”
I started breathing heavier as the panic set in. My mind was telling me to try, but my heart and body were screaming for me to run. I could feel the tears rolling down my cheeks as he pulled down one of my straps and he watched it fall down my shoulder. Then he moved his hand to my other strap and started to pull it down as well. He sat back and looked at me again. He wiped a tear as he leaned in to kiss me, but I couldn’t let him. I moved my head away and he started kissing my cheek. This was it; I had no choice but to let him take me.
Chapter 23
Evelyn
“What the fuck are you doing?!” Caitlin was in the door way screaming at Eli. I saw he snapped out of his trance when he looked down at me confused.
“Oh no, Evelyn I–”
I could see his heart breaking. He moved across the room to get as far away from me as possible. I looked at Caitlin as she stormed over to him and forced him out of the room locking the door.
“Oh my God Evelyn I’m so sorry. Are you ok?” Tears were pouring down her face now as she tried to cover me up.
“It’s not your fault, it’s not Eli’s either.” I said.
“Evelyn don’t defend him. I saw what he was doing, and I saw your face. Don’t tell me you wanted that. Anyone could see you didn’t want it. He should have known better.” She was sat next to me now. She had put a blanket around my shoulders.
I felt like more of an idiot now. Whenever I tried to make it right it just made everything worse.
“No, you’re right. I didn’t want it, but I needed to try.”
“Why did you need to try? If you don’t like Eli that way, then choose someone else. Why him?” She didn’t understand, and I couldn’t bring myself to say it.
“Because there is nobody else. There never has been. At least with Eli I know he loves me. I know he would never harm me. If I can just get it out of the way, maybe then I can learn to be with him or someone else. I could have a life and a family. Without it what else do you have? I have no future.” I felt completely alone.
Caitlin wrapped her arm around my shoulder. “I’m sorry Evelyn, I am, but what are you even doing here?”
“The agents are only aft
er me Caitlin. I’m going to give myself to them.” She was about to protest, but I held my hand up to her to let me finish. “I can’t have a normal life. I never will and all I’m doing is dragging all of you down with me. This is ruining lives. Not just yours and mine but Jakes as well. I can’t live the rest of my life on the run and alone. Aiden was with me, but it’s getting to complicated now. At least this way everyone can move on.” I looked at Caitlin, but she had new tears forming in her eyes.
“I can’t let you go.” She said.
“I want to go. I want to be with my mom. I was happy with her.” Now I was starting to cry.
“Not a happy as you are with Aiden.” She said staring me in the face. She wiped my tear away. “I’ve never seen you this happy. It’s like with him you can be yourself. I’ve never seen you so alive. You may not have the relationship you want but what would this do to him? He’s lost the same as you, but he isn’t giving up.” She thought maybe she found the reason for me to stay, but that was the reason I wanted to go.
“I can’t do this anymore.” I said
“Evelyn stop being a martyr and snap out of this self-loathing! You aren’t giving up I won’t let you!”
“You don’t have a choice.” I said.
I stood up and headed for the door. As I opened it I heard her get up to try and stop me, but I was already gone. As I walked through the lobby to leave the hotel I stopped at the desk to find out if there was a taxi service nearby. Luckily there was one just around the corner. When I got there, I asked for a cab to Sarah and Pete’s house. That’s where they found me before. I’m sure that’s where they’ll find me again.
Aiden
I could feel everything he was doing to her. I could see his eyes lusting at her and him pulling off her clothes while kissing her face. I could feel how much she hated his hands on her, but she didn’t stop him. The tears rolling down her face and fear catching in her throat, but I couldn’t do anything. I was still 5 miles away, and the traffic was starting to build. I turned to Jake.
Eden's Children Page 20