The Shadow Realm

by James Galloway

  He would have to talk to Jesmind, and soon. He wouldn't touch Kimmie without at least letting her know, and he had the feeling that he'd better do it before Kimmie started getting to him. More than she already had gotten to him, actually.

  Tarrin brooded about Kimmie for the rest of that day and most of the next, taking turns between lessons and the drake, but his mind wasn't really on either. Or at least part of his lessons. Sapphire seemed perfectly at ease when Camara Tal came into the room and sat down with him to continue teaching him about Priest magic, but when Keritanima and Miranda came to visit him after lunch, the blue drake almost immediately attacked them. Tarrin had to use Sorcery to restrain the animal as she launched up off the bed with lightning crackling around her body. Tarrin realized quickly after that that it was because of Torm. The drake had thought Torm was attacking her, and now she associated Wikuni scents with enemies. Camara Tal was human, so her scent was completely different. When Camara Tal came in and showed she wasn't an enemy, the drake accepted her easily.

  Tarrin saw that it would take a long time to break Sapphire of that, unless he cheated. The easiest way to do that would be to talk to Triana. He knew the Druidic spells for talking to animals, but they were for talking to normal animals. Drakes weren't what many would call normal animals, so he wasn't sure if the spells would work on her. And if they did, he wasn't sure if they'd hurt her, or him, or both of them because they weren't entirely compatible with her. All he had to do was talk to Sapphire and assure her that Wikuni weren't enemies, that it was just a misunderstanding, but before he tried, he wanted to make sure it would be alright.

  All in all, however, given that he'd only had the drake for two days, he was rather pleased with her. She was a constant companion, she didn't really cause too much trouble, and she was very affectionate. Sapphire's presence had been enough to keep him from talking to Jesmind about Kimmie the night before, since he was content to let her distract him. He'd already found out from Phandebrass what drakes would eat, and it only took a while and a little Conjuring to determine Sapphire's likes and dislikes. The only thing so far he had bad to say about her was that she was a little bit too energetic sometimes. She knocked over the washstand and almost broke a wing chasing a small flying insect through the cabin, intent on catching and eating it. Drakes were social animals and hunted in packs, hunting animals their size or larger, but an individual drake would hunt anything smaller than itself, even insects. At least she didn't use her electrical ability to try to catch the insect, she could have set fire to the cabin.

  Tarrin stayed in the cabin the first day out of necessity, but stayed another day both to keep Sapphire separated from the Wikuni and avoid Kimmie. Just thinking about her raised all sorts of instinctual urges in him, the kinds of urges that were extremely hard to suppress. He still had his lesson with Camara Tal, but since Keritanima couldn't come into his room, he instead spent the free time between lunch and dinner reading from a book Camara Tal had lent him, a book on multipantheonic history and philosophy. It described all ten Elder Gods and all forty-five Younger Gods, as well as the six established deities that were defined as Cult Gods. There were quite a few of them, and Tarrin saw the general lines in which they operated. The Elder Gods were gods of natural forces. There were a few Younger Gods that also represented natural forces, but the book said that they were subject to the Elder God whose sphere of influence overlapped their own. Those Younger Gods tended to represent and aspect of a sphere of influence, like Chulali, a Mahuut goddess of the jungle, and Talon, an Arathorn god of the forest and birds. Both were subject to Leia, the Elder goddess of nature. Vykar the Ravager, god of storms, was subject to T'Kya, Elder Goddess of weather. Those Younger Gods that didn't represent a natural force instead represented a human condition, pursuit, or position. Ragya was the god of disease. Endar and K'tar were gods of war, Endar representing the dark aspects of war such as bloodlust and killing, while K'Tar represented the purity of the concept, the testing of man against man in honorable combat. Denthar was the god of knowledge, and Sheniia was the goddess of peace, mercy, and healing. A Younger God represented an aspect of human culture, but they could also be a patron god to a kingdom or nation. The Sulasian patron god, Karas, was the god of law and justice. The Ungardt patron god, Dalstaad, was the god of strength and power, and to a minor degree, another god of war. The Younger Gods that weren't gods of nature didn't answer to any specific Elder God, but instead attended to their own devices. They still had to obey the Elder Gods, but didn't have a specific one looking over their shoulder.

  Tarrin had almost immediately looked up Val. It turned out that he was considered a Younger God. He was the god of darkness, but was also called the god of evil, and was also considered a god of discord, feeding off conflict. The book said that he was known as the Forgotten God, whose imprisonment by Spyder some five thousand years ago had caused him to be forgotten by all but the sages and historians.

  Were they wrong. The worship of Val was alive and well among the ki'zadun, the very organization that Val created to further his own ends.

  Tarrin had never really thought much about the hierarchy of the gods. After all, he had his goddess, and the rest of them just didn't seem to be very important. But Camara Tal did think it to be important that he understand how the gods functioned in the world, and to understand their orders in order to better get along with them.

  So many gods. Sixty of them, and those were only the human gods. The Wikuni had gods of their own, ten of them, and the Vendari had three gods they revered. The Aeradalla had a god of their own, as did the Selani. And he was pretty sure that the various races of the Goblinoids, Fae-da'Nar, and other sentient beings he'd never heard of before also had their own gods. Quite a few gods, all trying to work together in what they'd probably consider to be a confined space. Contending with one another, competing for worshippers and territory, all jockeying for power through their orders, which constantly strove to convert others to their god's worship.

  Tarrin got so involved in the book that he almost forgot about dinner, but Sapphire wasn't about to let herself go without something to eat. She bit at the ends of his fingers in agitation as the sunlight began to creep across the cabin, as the sun lowered towards the western horizon. He looked up and realized he'd been reading from the book since just after noon. He wasn't quite ready to take the drake outside just yet, so he Conjured a meal for both of them, wolfed it down, and then decided it would be a good time to see if Triana was with Jesmind.

  As Sapphire gnawed on a chunk of roasted beef, complete with bone, Tarrin put his paw around his amulet and called out to Jesmind. She answered almost immediately, her voice tart. "You call later and later, and now you call before sunset," she accused. "Make up your mind!"

  "You're testy today," he told her by way of greeting. "What's the matter?"

  "Your daughter has been changing the color of the walls!" she shot at him. Whenever Jasana did something magical and it was something naughty, she became his daughter. When she was behaving, she was their daughter. "Then she changed that cat you gave her into a goldfish! And we won't even discuss what she did this morning!"

  Tarrin almost laughed, but knew it would only set Jesmind off. "She's your daughter too, Jesmind. Punish her."

  "I already did, but you know how much good punishing her does."

  "Almost none," he admitted.

  "Damn right. She got both our stubbornness."

  "Is everything back to normal?"

  "Somewhat. The cat won't come anywhere near anything more than a saucer of water, but Triana said it'll calm down after a while."

  Tarrin chuckled. "I need to talk to Triana, Jesmind. Is she around?"

  "She's in Jasana's room," she replied. "Why, what's the matter?"

  "Nothing serious. I sorta ended up getting stuck with a pet of my own, and I need Triana's help learning a spell to talk to it. It's kind of unusual."

  "What is it?"

  "A drake."

  There wa
s a pause. "Like those two little flying lizards the Wizard has?"

  "Just like them, except this one is a different color."

  "Oh. I kind of liked them. Is it cute?"

  "I think she is," he replied.

  "Why do you need to talk to Triana? Doesn't that Wizard know how to take care of drakes?"

  "He already told me what I need to do, but the drake thinks Wikuni are enemies, and keeps attacking them. I need to be able to talk to her, so I can convince her that Wikuni aren't enemies."

  "That could be a problem, given you're on a Wikuni ship and you're going to the Wikuni homeland," she agreed with a slight chuckle. "Mother, Tarrin needs to talk to you for a bit. Tarrin, how are we going to do this? Do I have to tell you what she says in reply?"

  "Don't you know your own mother, Jesmind?" Tarrin chided. "She's got her own ways to talk to me."

  Almost on cue, a swirling bluish circle of energy spun out of nothingness before the bed, in the direction he was facing. Tarrin had seen something like it before, and knew that an image of Triana would appear in its center when it was fully formed. Sapphire, on the other hand, didn't quite know what to make of it. At first she hissed at it, then sniffed at the air, flicking out that forked tongue. When she found no scent to go along with the strange light, she flitted from the desk, where her water bowl was, to the bed and settled down on Tarrin's lap. Obviously, she accepted it as some kind of natural phenomenon. The blue circle of glowing, swirling energy grew to the size of a large mirror, then colors formed in its center and expanded. They changed size and shape and contracted, slowly forming a clear image of Jasana's bedroom. Jasana was sitting on the bed in her nightshirt, pulling a tangle out of the tip of her tail. Triana sat sedately on the edge of the bed, looking at him with that stony expression.

  "Cub," she said with a nod of her head.

  "Papa!" Jasana said happily, bouncing up and looking at him. Tarrin's mood improved vastly when he looked at his cub, looking just as happy and energetic as ever. Her strawberry blond hair had been tied back behind her head, and the white furred cat ears that poked up from the tied hair looked a bit larger than usual, since the hair that surrounded them was pulled down. Jasana's hair was as thick and springy as her parents'. "Is that really you, Papa?"

  "Of course it's me, cub," he replied with a bright smile. "Your grandmother is using a spell that lets us see each other."

  "You're looking a bit drawn, cub," Triana noted sharply as Jesmind sat down on the other side of Jasana and looked at him. Jesmind looked as lovely as ever, but she had an unfriendly expression on her face. That softened considerably when she looked at him, replaced by a loving smile.

  "I'm doing well enough, mother," he replied absently. "I need a bit of help."

  "What with?"

  "Well, as you can see, I have this new little friend," he said, pointing at the drake. "I need to talk to her to break her of a fairly bad habit. Do you know a spell you could teach me to let me talk to her?"

  "What is that, Papa?" Jasana asked, leaning over her grandmother's leg and peering close to the viewing spell. "It looks like a big lizard someone painted."

  "It's a drake, cub," he told her. "A blue drake. Remember the drakes that Phandebrass has?"

  "I never got to pet them," she pouted in reply.

  "They don't really like strangers, cub," he told her.

  "Sathon didn't teach you the spell to talk to animals?" Triana asked in surprise. "It's a basic Druid spell."

  "He did, but this is a rather special animal, mother," he replied. "She's not what you'd consider a natural animal. I wasn't sure if the spell would work, or if it would cause her harm, so I wanted to make sure of things with you before I tried."

  "You can use the spell on a drake, Tarrin," she assured him. "At least you were wise enough to check with me before trying."

  "I don't want to hurt her, mother."

  She nodded, then seemed to study him carefully. "You do look a little stressed, cub. What's wrong?"

  "Just the situation, mother," he replied carefully, glancing at Jesmind. "I'll be happy when we're back on dry land."

  Triana was quiet a moment. "Just bed her, cub," she announced bluntly, taking Tarrin aback.

  "What?" Jesmind demanded. "Tarrin, is Kimmie causing you trouble?"

  "Well, not trouble," he said quickly. "We're just starting to--"

  "Drop it, cub," Triana said flatly. "You can't lie to me, and I'm not blind. If Kimmie's interested, bed her."

  "Mother!" he gasped.

  "Stop thinking like a human, Tarrin," she ordered. "You're not Jesmind's exclusive property, no matter what you may think." Jesmind glared at Triana, but said nothing. "After all, cub, it's just sex."

  That seemed to strike at the core of his dilemma, caught between the Were-cat's casual attitude towards that kind of thing, and his human association with fidelity as part of a relationship. He blew out his breath and gave Triana a helpless look, then avoided Jesmind's eyes. "It feels like cheating," he admitted.

  "There's no such thing among Were-cats, cub," she chided him. "A female gets exclusive rights to a male only as long as she can keep him. When Jesmind let you leave, she let you go, and when she did that, she gave up her claim on you. Kimmie knows that, and that means that if she knows you're interested, she'll come after you with everything she's got. If she does that, you'll bed her whether you want to or not. It's best to do it willingly, so you don't have any guilt over it afterward."

  "Jesmind may have had to let me leave, but I never said I was leaving her," he explained to his bond-mother. "It just doesn't seem right to me, mother. It just doesn't."

  Triana looked at Jesmind expectantly. Jesmind seemed to be ready to challenge her mother's will, but that defiance died as soon as Triana's expression turned ominous.

  "Alright!" Jesmind snapped at her mother. "Tarrin, I--damnit, I don't want to do this!"

  "You'd rather leave Tarrin in pain?" Triana asked archly. "I knew you were selfish, cub, but this even surprises me!"

  "Gramma, what's wrong?" Jasana asked in a small voice.

  "You're learning how not to treat a mate, little cub," Traina told her firmly. "Your mother is putting her desires over your father's needs. She's being very selfish and stubborn, and her selfishness is going to make your father sick, because he won't do what he needs to do unless your mother tells him it's alright."

  Jesmind averted her gaze from her mother. "If I let him go, he may not come back," she protested weakly.

  "Are you sure you know him at all, you foolish cub?" Triana bored into her. "Don't you trust him, or do you just think you're not woman enough to keep him?"

  That hit a nerve. Jesmind raised her gaze and looked at her mother challengingly.

  "Papa won't leave us, Mama," Jasana said assuringly. "He promised to come back."

  "Alright," Jesmind growled. "Tarrin--I can't believe I'm saying this! Tarrin, if Kimmie's after you, go ahead. But don't get too friendly with her!" she warned in an ugly tone. "And tell her that me and her are going to talk about this when you get back!"

  "It's not her fault, Jesmind," Tarrin said defensively. "It's my fault. I made it worse when she cornered me about why I've been avoiding her and dragged the truth out of me. She said she'd be after me. She even told me to tell you that, and that she'd be happy to step aside when we got back to Suld."

  "Oh, sure she says that now," Jesmind snapped. "Just like she said she wouldn't touch you!"

  "She never did," he told her. "I told you, it's my fault."

  "You're a male, cub," Triana told her mildly. "A male trapped on a ship with a female that has interest in you. There's nothing either of you could do about it."

  "You did this on purpose, didn't you!" Jesmind suddenly accused. "You knew Kimmie had it for him, didn't you! That's why you sent her!"

  "That's why," Triana admitted shamelessly. "Tarrin needs to learn what it's like to be with another female. It'll make things easier for both of you when you do finally part ways."<
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  "I can't believe it! My own mother engineers a plan to steal my mate!" she shouted, standing up.

  "I didn't allow anyone to steal anything," Triana said calmly. "Gods, woman! If you don't trust Tarrin enough to be a Were-cat male, then you should go find a human!"

  "What does that mean?" Jesmind snapped.

  "It means that of all people, I thought you, an elder female, would understand the nature of our kind," she replied bluntly. "Isn't it you that taught Tarrin the difference between emotion and sex? Weren't you secretly seducing him even when you were supposed to be killing him?"

  That made Jesmind blush furiously, sitting back down and assuming a meek posture.

  "Didn't think I knew about that, did you?" Triana challenged mockingly. "The point is, daughter, don't give yourself rights and then deny them to Tarrin. If it were another male in the Tower that had your eye, you wouldn't think twice about bedding him. And don't deny it."

  Jesmind blew out her breath, then nodded silently. That stung Tarrin a little bit, but in that moment he began to understand what Triana was trying to get across to him. To both of them, for that matter. "If I got this jealous every time Thean took another female for mate, all my hair would be white and my fur would fall out," she said in an accusing tone. "Both of you had better learn how to deal with knowing the other is with someone else. Part of this is to teach both of you that there is life after you break up."

  Both Tarrin and Jesmind were uncomfortably silent, and Tarrin just looked at Jasana. His daughter was listening attentively, and didn't seem to understand the emotion involved in Triana's words.

  "So, Tarrin," Triana said. "If Kimmie interests you, take her. She won't say no. I guarantee it. And Jesmind," she said sharply. "Learn to trust Tarrin. He loves you, and when he comes back, he'll be yours again. Until then, let him learn what it's like to be mates with some female other than you. Let him learn the same thing you learned when you were his age."