Cole gave me a look like, Come on. Be real. “We just had our first game, man,” he voiced. “Now I believe it’s time to par-tayyy! Tori, Briana is over there waiting on you. She said y’all need to go over to her house and get things ready. I’m ’bout to run to the store with Perry.”
“Cole, I was not headed to your girl’s house, man,” I said, as Cole seemed to not take no for an answer.
Tori and I looked at each other. We weren’t connecting, and that was frustrating. It was actually good to see her walk away. Cole and I stopped off at the Piggly Wiggly and bought sodas. He tried to pick up some beer, saying he had a fake ID to buy it with.
I told him, “Naw, I ain’t buying that for you.”
“You such a wuss, man,” he said in a stern tone.
“Whatever, man. I ain’t about to lose my potential scholarship for no misdemeanor,” I responded, standing my ground. “And I’m not letting you go down like that, either.”
“Yeah, right. That ain’t the only reason. You ain’t never even tasted the stuff.”
“And I’m not about to taste it now, either. Let’s go.”
In the cash register line, there were two girls right behind us. I had never seen them before, but Cole said that they went to our school. Cute lil’ brown sugars. One had cornrows with a lil’ meat on her bones, and her friend had creamy, beige skin and was stacked. Cole invited them to our party.
I said, “Man, are you crazy? Our girls gon’ be there!”
Cole turned around and said, “Y’all know how to behave when we with our girlfriends, right? You ain’t gon’ embarrass us brothas. Come on and make the party more fun and join us. You honeys liked the game tonight, right?” They both nodded. “Then, you gotta come help us celebrate.”
We couldn’t get out the store without him inviting six more people to Briana’s place. All I wanted was time alone with my girl, and now it was like I was gonna be at the house party of the year or something.
“I ain’t buying no more food for all these people you inviting,” I said to him.
“Oh, yeah. I got that, I got that.” Cole turned around and announced to the store, “It’s BYOF time!”
“What, boy?” someone shouted.
“Bring Your Own Food. Come on, Cuz. Act like ya know.”
When we got to Briana’s house, there were cars everywhere. I knew I shouldn’t have let none of them talk me into coming. I was heated.
“See, I can tell you ain’t happy that we ’bout to throw down in here. We just won our first game and you ready to spoil everything. Come on, bruh. Relax!” Cole said.
“It’s Tori, man. I just didn’t want my night to go down like this, all right?”
“I’m trying to tell you don’t sweat that she ain’t putting out yet. You can take care of that and still be with her. Then you wouldn’t be so uptight when she tell yo butt ‘No!’”
I put up my hand, got out the car, locked the door and carried the groceries inside.
“All right. You don’t have to do it my way. One of these days you gon’ get tired of making yourself happy,” he said, wiggling his hand.
I pushed him. “Boy, you so stupid.”
“I’m just real, Perry. Satisfied and real!” he said to me before yelling through Briana’s house. “We here, everybody. Let’s get the party started!”
Cole went on his way, not getting me at all. I mean, I wanted sex, but I only wanted it with one person. To me it wasn’t about a ‘Wham, bam, thank you for satisfying me” kinda thing. I wanted to feel something deep. It didn’t have to be love, but it had to be something meaningful.
And Cole should’ve known the solution for him wasn’t adding up for me. He could tease me. I was still pure, and I was cool with that. Wasn’t sayin’ I was proud of it, but I figured once I found Tori, said the necessary things to get her excited, we could blow this joint and celebrate my way. But before I could get to her, Amandi came and took the groceries from my arms and put them in a chair. She was jerking her body from side to side and pushed me down on the sofa.
“Word’s out that you want some. I spotted an empty bedroom. Let me make you feel good.”
She just didn’t know her offering it up like that was a turnoff. I didn’t know what I was thinking the first time I saw her. She was fine back then, but now she seemed trashy. Didn’t the girl have more respect for herself than to just give it away like that? But it didn’t matter what I was thinking. I had gotten caught by my girl in a very compromising situation. And Tori read all kinds of stuff into it.
Next thing I knew Tori threw a pillow at Amandi’s back ... It was on then!
“What you doing all up on my man? What’s up?” Tori shouted at Amandi.
“Please! Everybody know y’all are through. Plus, you’re with Marlon, the Knife Boy. Perry is free, and I’m ’bout to change all that,” she said before getting back on my lap.
I had to push her back, though. She didn’t speak for me. Seeing two ladies go at it because of me wasn’t making me feel good.
“Amandi, Tori is my girl,” I spoke up.
Tori pointed for me to follow her outside. We walked away. There were so many people in that house. My head was hurting from how hot and sweaty it was getting.
When I found my way outside, I said to Tori, “All right, can we blow this place now?”
“I told Briana I’d help her since her folks know I’m spending the night over here. Why can’t you stay beside me? Why you have to be all out so those girls can think you’re by yourself?” she asked.
“We don’t have to put on a show for nobody. We can leave, and I’ll bring you back when the party’s done. I thought we wanted the same thing.”
“It’s supposed to be about us being together, Perry. And we’re together right now.”
“Naw, that’s not what I reassigned for. I mean, I knew we were gon’ take things slow, and I’m okay with that. But even with that, I just want some time alone with you.”
“It’s just gonna lead us to trouble,” she sighed.
Cole came grabbing me for help. My girl got away. I was upset, feeling like Tori and I were only together for appearances. By the disgusted look on my face as I came back inside, all the ladies in the house knew that me and Tori’s thing wasn’t that solid. I wasn’t down with forcing myself on anybody. Tori made me feel like she wasn’t ready to get anything going.
All night I watched her. She smiled at me, and that was nice. We danced, and that was cool. She kept putting up a fight when I wanted us to spend time alone. That wasn’t gon’ cut it. I needed to figure this “getting back together thing” out. Maybe I had made a mistake.
My dad was up when I walked through the door. “Boy, I told you to be in this house at 1:30. It’s 1:45! And you strolling up in here like you’re grown or something.”
“Dad, I’m just fifteen minutes late. It’s not that big a deal. I had to help get Cole out of trouble.”
“What you mean, get him out of trouble? Y’all been drinking or something?”
“Naw, Dad. You know I’m not into that.”
“Boy, I don’t know what you’re into. Saw you at the game, told you what time to be home, and you broke that. Your mother and I have been up worrying about where you were. You don’t call, and you don’t even answer your cell phone. And then you walk up in here like it’s no big deal. Guess you figure you don’t owe us an explanantion. I’m not having it! You will respect my authority as long as you live in my house.”
“Fine, Dad, I’m in trouble. Just give me my punishment tomorrow,” I said as I walked past him, ready to lay my head on the bed.
“Boy, if you don’t bring your behind back here right now ...”
I turned around and walked back toward my father. He was mad, but I was furious with the fact that he was blowing these few minutes out of proportion. And for what? I wasn’t messing up in no kinda way. He had a good son compared to most.
When my friends want to get drunk, some of my boys sneak in a lil�
� somethin’ somethin’, and I haven’t gotten with that. I even have some teammates that slip and slide with different girls, but I don’t do none of that, and my dad still trippin’. He didn’t even realize what he’s got: a great son. Let Cole or Damarius switch places with me for a day. Then he’d be grateful for what he’s got. But in a few more months, I’ll be gone and I’ll never have to worry about his stupid rules ever again.
“You know what, boy? Just go to bed,” he said as I walked back over. “We’ll talk about this tomorrow and I’m taking your keys.”
We never said good night to each other. We never apologized. We just sauntered to our own rooms and stood our own ground. I wasn’t a lil’ boy anymore. My dad’s voice couldn’t shake me anymore.
My parents’ room wasn’t right down the hall, it was downstairs. So I couldn’t believe it when I was awakened to the two of them arguing early Saturday morning. Dragging myself downstairs, I had to get down there to see what was going on. I knew my folks’ relationship hadn’t been all good lately, but arguing in the house was something I had never heard them do. I figured if I let them see me, then they would cease screaming.
However, I was frozen in my tracks when I heard my mother say, “You act like I don’t know what’s best for our son.”
“I’m not saying you don’t know what’s best for him, you just keep babying the boy!” my dad said loudly.
Aww, snap! They were arguing about me, I realized. Truly, I didn’t want to be the cause of tension between them.
“Junior needs to be looking at a school that’s gon’ challenge his mind, like Duke or Georgia Tech. Those were my top choices,” my mom said.
My dad said, “If that boy is going to school for football, then he’s going to have to go somewhere where he doesn’t have to pray to get out. Yeah, he’s smart but if he takes that knowledge to a school where academics isn’t so overbearing, then he’s gonna come out great. It’s like you trying to make the boy fail.”
“Well, honey, he’s not going to school to major in football. What if he gets hurt? I mean, let’s be realistic here. Most of those boys who are recruited in high school do not go on to maintain professional careers in their sport. I want our son to have something else to fall back on. Actually, not something to fall back on, but something that is his top priority. And he needs to make this decision. You chose where you wanted to go to school.”
“That boy don’t know what he’s doing. He definitely needs his father in this process. And it’s clear to me that his mama don’t need to have nothing to do with it,” my father boasted. “He doesn’t need to go to a school where they don’t even have business as a major. You know I want him to take over the dealership one day.”
That was news to me. Payton always wanted that job. And my dad made her feel like it was hers. Now he was saying he wanted me to take up the family buisness. Wonder when he was going to ask me?
He continued, “You’re not even acknowledging that he’s a great football player. The top player in the state right now, Patricia. He needs to ride the football thing until the ride ends. You’re trying to make him get off of it before it stops. Believe in your son.”
My mom put her hand up in front of my dad. I guess she wanted him to hush up. He grabbed her arm harshly. It was something about the way he grabbed it that made me snap. I dashed inside the kitchen area and pushed my father back with hard force. I’d never used that on him before. It was like defending a free safety or something.
“Boy, have you lost your mind?” my dad yelled as he turned and grabbed me by the collar. “I wasn’t gon’ hurt your mama. We’re just in here talking.”
His lil’ grip wasn’t bothering me at all. I just didn’t want my dad to think that I was scared of him. I know what I saw, and I know what I heard. And my mom’s reaction showed she was very uncomfortable.
“Let him go, Junior! You two stop that,” my mother ordered.
I didn’t know why my mama was telling me to stop. I wasn’t doing anything. I was just standing there boldly while my dad had my shirt shriveled all up in his hand. I hated the fact that I was named after my father in times like these.
Only around my parents did I not get to be who I normally was, and that was Perry. I had to answer to Junior, and he got to hold the name. I didn’t know why my father and I were drifting apart so, but when I looked at him I could only pray, “Lord, help us.”
“Son, let me tell you. The next time you come at me like a man, I’m gon’ take off my belt and show you that you’re still a boy. You understand me?”
I said nothing. I wasn’t trying to disrespect him, but at this time I felt he didn’t deserve my respect. So I said nothing. I mean, what was he gon’ do? Really take off his belt and make me say something? I just looked at him. He came over toward me, and my mom got in his way.
“Let him go,” my mother said. “Son, go on to your room now. Go, go!”
I had no problem following that order. I still couldn’t believe what had just occurred. Breathing deeply, I retreated to my room and wished things were different.
For the next two days my father and I avoided each other. Monday morning when I was ready to head to school in my car, I noticed I didn’t have my keys. My dad had talked about taking the car, but I didn’t pay it no mind since I’d driven it yesterday. Why was he trippin’?
“Mom, where are my keys?”
All of a sudden, my dad walked into the room jingling the keys. Guess he called himself trying to teach me a lesson.
“Dad, I need my keys or I’m gonna be late for school!” I said without thinking.
“Guess you better call one of your boys to come get you or tell your mom to take you. You won’t be driving this car for a week.”
“All my friends are probably off to school, Dad. Why didn’t you tell me last night that you were taking my car?”
“I told you when you came in late Friday night that I was taking your car.”
“Why you doing this? I don’t need my mom taking me to school; I’m not in kindergarten. Come on, Dad. I just won’t be late for curfew anymore.”
“That’s not all it’s about, Junior. You’ve been acting mighty grown around here lately. You might be good on the football field, but you stepped incorrectly to me the other day. I haven’t heard any apology from you yet.”
“I thought you was messing with my moms. You’re the one who taught me to defend her and my sister, no matter who it was.”
“And I see you trying to be a smart aleck again. You better find you a way to school, and, Patricia, don’t you dare take him. He thinks it’s beneath him to get a ride from a parent, let him figure it out on his own. Everything he’s got and everything on his back, our money bought for him. And, what? He gon’ challenge me? I’m tired of fussing with the boy.”
“Honey, I hear you but school is important, so I’m taking him to school.”
“No, I said don’t take him.”
“No! I’m taking him to school. Junior, let’s go.”
I was smiling on the inside. By the look on my father’s face, he wasn’t pleased, though. He started talking some more mess, and I blocked it all out because my mom was taking me to school. In my mind, I had won.
But as we got in the car and drove in silence I realized maybe I hadn’t won at all. Maybe I had just driven a bigger wedge between my parents. I felt worse than if I’d been hit by a Mack truck.
I, too, was tired of arguing with my father, but that was just our life now. He thought he ruled everything, but he didn’t rule me. If I had to be uncomfortable or make my mom uncomfortable, then so be it. Taking my car and my keys for a week, my dad was crazy. But even though I didn’t agree with him, he still was the one calling all the shots. Shoot! I wasn’t walking, but I wasn’t driving, either. I was riding in the car with my moms to school. A senior. Captain of the football team. A guy being recruited by several schools. A guy most girls in my school want to get with, and I had to get a ride with my moms. Wasn’t that a trip!
“Let’s ride over to Paine College,” Damarius said as Cole drove around Augusta after football practice.
“Yo, I’m tired. Take me home,” I said to the two of them.
“Boy, when you ain’t drivin’, you don’t get to decide where to go, last time I checked,” Damarius said from the passenger side.
I retorted, “Last time I checked, you weren’t drivin’, either.”
“Aww, come on, man. You gotta roll with us over to Paine so we can hit up those freshmen girls D and I met last night,” Cole said, revealing the real plan.
“Heck, naw! I ain’t going to see no girls on campus—what ? I just got my flow back together with Tori, and I ain’t tryin’ to add no drama to the situation. Just take me home.”
“You a punk, man,” Damarius said as he turned around to me.
From the backseat, I sat up and squeezed his neck. “What the heck you say?”
“Come on, y’all,” Cole said as he started swerving the car. “Let him go, Perry, man! Let him go.”
“No!”
Cole took the car onto the side of the road. We barely missed hitting two cars, thanks to his driving. He slammed on his brakes, stopped the car and pulled my hands from his pal’s trembling body.
Damarius started coughing. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you, man,” he turned around and said to me.
“I’m sick and tired of people telling me what I need to do with my life. I wanna go home. I’m not tryin’ to chase no skirt. You know I’m on punishment. Besides, I’m surprised none of y’all negroes ain’t got one of these girls pregnant or caught a disease, as much as y’all try to get with every girl y’all see. I got other stuff on my mind than trying to add more girl problems to the list.”
Damarius rubbed his neck. “Take him home, then, Cole, if it’s like that.”
I made sure they both knew I wasn’t with their games. “It’s like that.”
Being at home doing my homework was hard. I was used to having my own car: go where I wanted to go and do what I wanted to do. But now I had to get a ride with my friends. I could’ve called Tori, but ... I don’t know. Guess I was just tired of arguing. I could’ve begged my dad for my keys back and apologized, told him I’d learned my lesson. Naw, that wasn’t too appealing, either.
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