Damned

by Bec Botefuhr

  “Enough information.”

  “I wasn’t going to give you anymore.”

  I sit down. “Mind if I stay a while?”

  “Won’t they go crazy with security, helicopters and all that?”

  I laugh, god now that’s an image. “We own over a hundred hectares; there are times I head off for a whole day and night, they don’t look. I always come back.”

  “Rebel.”

  “For two people who do not know each other, we get along kind of well.”

  He winks at me. “I am charming, what can I say?”

  “Charming is not the word I would apply but ok, we will stay with that.”

  “You like me darlin, just admit it.”

  “I kind of do, I don’t know why. Considering I do not know you, but, you make me smile and that’s something.”

  “Don’t fall in love with me though, I do not do a nice lover.”

  I stare at him and see he is serious, the deep set of his eyes and his frown tells me so. “So you screw around, but you don’t fall in love?”

  “No. I will be your friend, best one you ever had. I will fuck you, stroke you, take care of you, but I will never love you and you would do good never to love me.”

  “Wow, you never cease to amaze me. Don’t panic, I have no plans of being anything more than a friend to you, Captain.”

  “Not after any of the other perks?” He winks, and I hit him with my best glare.

  “No, thanks. It seems you have plenty to stroke, take care of and fu…play with.”

  “Can’t say it can you, little princess?”

  “Fuck fuck fuck fuck.”

  “Stop that.” He growls.

  “Can’t take the heat, Fabio?”

  He touches my face, and I shudder. “I can take anything you got, I doubt it works the other way around though.”

  “I could handle you.” I say proudly, chin raised.

  “No, you couldn’t. You are a nice girl; you would fall in love with me the moment I laid my hands on you.”

  “What makes you think you are that good?”

  “I can see it in your eyes, you are already mad about me. If I got that close, you would melt.”

  “Oh get over yourself. I find you attractive, I may or may not be developing a crush on you, but I certainly am not about to fall in love with you. It is called Lust pirate, look it up. I have known you less than twenty four hours, calm down.”

  “Once or twice it would be lust, if I kept coming back it would be love. Take my advice princess, do not fall for me.”

  “You are so in love with yourself.” I mumble into my hands, god damned arrogant man.

  “As I said, you are a nice girl. I don’t like to see nice girls get hurt.”

  “Who did the damage to you pirate? Why wouldn’t you allow yourself to care for someone?”

  I dare to take a peek at him, and his stare is hard. “I’m a pirate, I am a monster. I am not good for any woman other than for a good fuck. It is where it ends.”

  “What if you did fall in love, then what?”

  “I’d never let anything go that far, I would run far before it got to that point.”

  “You would just up and leave, just like that?”

  “Yeah. I give women everything they need, just not my heart. I would never chase a girl, even if I did love her. It's just how I am.”

  “So…you’re saying if you fell in love for real and that girl left, you would not go after her?”

  “No, I would not. If she chose to leave, it means she does not want me. Why would I bother?”

  “She could just be hurt!” I protest.

  “I do not chase. End of story.”

  “Have you ever been in love pirate?”

  He shakes his head. “Never.”

  “Close?”

  “Close. I was married.”

  “You were married?” I gasp.

  “Yeah.”

  “And you swore your loyalty to a woman, but didn’t love her?”

  He shrugs.

  “Wow, you got issues.”

  “How?”

  “You just do. I thought I was complicated.” I roll my eyes and shake my head. God the man is trying.

  “You are.”

  “Well, you need not worry. I have no interest in anything more than friendship.”

  “Friends with benefit’s?” He adds with a smile.

  “Dream on.”

  “You’ll give in.”

  “I doubt that.”

  “You will.”

  “Oh stop it or I’ll leave.”

  “No one’s stopping you.” He snaps, seriously.

  “You’re a nasty person.”

  “I am.”

  “Well you better be nice to me, or I will not come visit you.” I say, folding my arms across my chest and nodding my head in a ‘so there’ kind of way.

  “Again, no one’s making you.”

  I thrust my phone at him. “Did you read your stalker message this morning?”

  He laughs and throws up his hands. “Alright, I will be nice to you, if you visit me.”

  “Deal.”

  An older man walks into the room then, followed by two others. One is very attractive and reminds me of a vampire with his long black hair, pale skin and blue eyes. The other is an older pirate, with long hair, a goatee, tattoos and a kind face. The third is a middle aged pirate, who looks rougher than the other two.

  “Cap.” They say in greeting. “Princess…”

  I smile shyly. “Hi.”

  “You came back, aren’t you going to be hung for sneaking out?” The older pirate asks, plonking down on the chair next to me.

  I laugh. “Something like that. I’m Jade, though you probably already know that.”

  “Rusty…nice to meet you lass.”

  “Jack.” Says the handsome one, extending his hand. I take it and shudder as what feels like an electric shock runs up my arm, he seems to feel it too, and I wonder for a moment; if he knows of my secret. He pulls away and smiles as though nothing has happened.

  “Jez.” The other pirate says in a gruff voice, snapping me out of my moment with Jack.

  “Aren’t you meant to be in parades or something like that, what are you in here hanging around this ball of trouble for?” Rusty grins and Jax punches his arm playfully.

  “He likes me, what can I say?”

  “I bet he does. Be careful, he is a rat bag.”

  “Don’t worry, he knows where I stand.” I smile at Jax, and he winks at me.

  “She’ll give in eventually.”

  “Unlikely.” I say, folding my arms but keeping my grin.

  “Aren’t you all bound and gagged girl?” Rusty laughs. “I didn’t think you would be allowed to rut with pirates.”

  “Oh I assure you, I do not plan on rutting with him. The pirate part’s not so bad though. I have nothing interesting in my life; it is good to see something different.”

  “Looks like you got a challenge on your hands Cap.”

  “Do I what.” Jax smirks.

  I blush and look away.

  “You look like you have rolled in the dirt, angel.” Jack says, surprising me with his kind words.

  “I…kind of slid through a lot of shrubs to get here.”

  “Do you have a shower I can borrow….and….err….a shirt?” I ask Jax, flushing. God I look awful, my clothes really are dirty.

  “Sure do.”

  “So why are you hiding love?” Rusty asks, obviously not concerned with how I look.

  “Oh, I am just tired of living the same old life. Any girl that wishes to be a princess is idiotic if you ask me.”

  Jack and Jez laugh.

  “Not all fluffy clouds and cake?”

  “Not at all.” I mutter. “But who cares about that, tell me about your life. That is so much more interesting.”

  Rusty smiles, then plods into the kitchen. He pulls out some eggs, bread and cheese.

  “Are you hungry, lass?”r />
  “Sure.”

  “Looks like I am going to have to fight for your company.” Jax mutters to himself as he disappears into the room, to pick me a shirt.

  I sit and gaze in awe as Rusty begins telling me about his life as a pirate.

  “So…there are like treasures and real things like that?”

  “Sure are lass, we don’t sail out there for nothing.”

  “I would say it is crazy, but I know that magical things certainly are not crazy.”

  “And what about the nasty magical things?” Jax asks, walking back in the room.

  “Like what?”

  “Monsters.”

  “I guess, well, yeah I think there are.”

  “You believe in the unreal girl?”

  “I do.” I nod.

  “Why?”

  “Long story.”

  I look at Jack who is staring at me, does he know what I am?

  “Anyway, will you teach me to shoot?” I say, changing the subject.

  Jax laughs, giving me a wicked grin. “What you wanna learn that for?”

  “Fun.”

  “Well I am sure we can arrange something. Now stop torturing my men and shower yourself.”

  I frown. “They don’t mind, do you boys?”

  “Not at all lass, come and talk to us anytime.”

  I give Jax a ‘so there’ look and walk off into the shower. I feel good, and for the first time in a long time, I am happy, warm even. I shower and change, letting my hair down and running my fingers through it so it will look half-decent. I pull on the shirt Jax gave me and then put on the shorts I was wearing under my horrid, ugly knee length skirt. My mother would have an absolute fit if she saw me right now. I join the men at the table and look down at the plate Rusty slides towards me. French toast.

  “Wow, this looks great.”

  “Probably nothing on what you are used to.” He murmurs, but I can see his proud smile.

  “I doubt that. All that fancy stuff is not as good as it sounds.”

  “Do you eat fish eggs?” Jez asks, wrinkling his nose.

  “You mean caviar? Hell on, but most royals do. I, however, am rebellious. I eat steak.” I grin.

  Jax is staring at me with a warm, friendly grin. Does he like that I get along with his crew?

  Jax puts a fork full of food in his mouth, I watch his jaw move; he has a nice jaw.

  “I can’t imagine you being rebellious?”

  “Well, in my world I am. I doubt I would be in yours.” I flush.

  “I think you are very cool.” Jack smiles.

  “Well thank you, I like to think so.”

  “None of that prissy talk or behavior. You are certainly not what I would imagine a princess to be like, plus you are real pretty too; not fake.” Rusty says between mouthfuls.

  “Well thanks. You’re not smelly, dirty and fat as I would expect.”

  They all laugh now and I suddenly realize, I do not want to go back. I eat the rest of my food and then promptly clean up. The men leave after another hour or so, and I miss them when they go. The bar opens for lunch; Jax begins preparing everything.

  “Wanna help?”

  “Serve?”

  “Sure why not.”

  “Ok.”

  He shows me all the different alcohol and how to serve it. We spend the afternoon laughing and chatting with each other and the customers. I love feeling normal, like nothing matters. I like feeling close to someone and I love being able to chat and feel the connection I feel with Jax. I could undoubtedly fall for someone like him, hard and fast.

  I walk out back when the lunch crowd leaves, and we only have few customers for the afternoon. I know I have to go back, even though I do not want to. I walk into Jax’s room, glancing around before pulling off his shirt and sliding my own back on. I sit on the bed, about to pull on my skirt when I hear the door open. Jax steps in, his eyes linger over my bare legs and then meet mine.

  “You’re leaving?”

  “I have to.” I whisper, blushing.

  He steps forward. “I had a good day, did you?”

  I nod, swallowing. “I like those men, from your crew.”

  “And they liked you, which is rare. They do not converse with ladies often.”

  “Thanks, for having me here today.”

  He says nothing, he just meets my eyes and steps forward; dropping to his knees in front of me. I begin feeling nervous, anxious.

  “What are you doing?” I whisper.

  “I am going to kiss you.”

  He doesn’t let me answer, he just reaches up, takes my head in his hands and pulls me forward. At first contact, I immediately melt inside. His lips are hot, wet and so damned tasty. He moves them over mine with perfection. I gasp as he drives his tongue into my mouth; the feeling is overwhelming but certainly not unpleasant. I fall into the kiss, taking his shoulders in my hands and pulling him closer. Moans slide from my mouth as he drags his lips down my neck.

  “We have to stop…” I hesitate.

  He pulls away quickly, presses one last kiss to my lips and stands.

  “And that is just the beginning of how I can make you feel, think about that.”

  “I should not have done that. I should go.”

  I pull on my clothes, mumble an apology and rush out of the room. I am ashamed of myself, I hardly know the man and I have just let him kiss me. Like I am easy. I run to the gate and hurry back to the castle, my cheeks flaming with embarrassment. I run straight into my mother and yelp.

  “Jade where have you been, gosh, what happened to your clothes?”

  I fell off my horse; I was just coming back to get changed.

  “Oh dear are you hurt?”

  “What does it matter to you or father?” I hiss angrily.

  “Love, I wanted to apologize for what your father did.”

  “I am sorry to, for ever thinking you two cared more about me then yourselves.”

  “We love you, it is why we are lining up your future this way. Would you rather be on the streets with nothing?”

  “It sounds a damn sight better than this.”

  She gapes at me. “You are too selfish, I did not bring you up like this.”

  “No mother, you brought me up with everything, but you never stopped and wondered if I wanted any of it.”

  “That makes no sense. All girls want what you have, you ungrateful child.”

  I shake my head. “Goodnight.”

  “Jade!” She yells, but I simply ignore her with a flick of my hand and shut my bedroom door.

  I slide out of my clothes and fall into bed; my life is torn. I have a guy that drives me crazy but refuses ever to give me what I want, and a family that wants me to marry and reproduce as though I am a mouse. I sigh and wiggle further into the warm comforter, my phone buzzes.

  Are you feeling good now, darlin?

  Yes, thank you.

  I am here, anytime, if you want more.

  I have told you, I am not sure that’s wise. I am pretty sure I would be hung.

  It’s your body gorgeous, it’s one thing you do get a say so in.

  I ponder that a moment; he is right. It is the one thing that’s mine. I tremble.

  Thanks, I had a good time…with everything.

  So it wasn’t so bad for a first kiss?

  It am fairy sure, it doesn’t get better. I am going to bed now, thanks again for today.

  Later, baby girl.

  Night pirate.

  I smile and shove my phone under my pillow. He makes me feel good in a way nobody ever has, and deep down, even after a mere few days, I know that I am falling way too fast for the pirate that is Jax Watts.

  CHAPTER 3

  The next day I spend the morning at a town parade, waving a smiling like a showpiece. It keeps my parents off my back for the most part. I sneak over to the bar that afternoon; my parents are away for the night so it is all mine. I do not have to worry much about James because he is off with Celeste; he would not miss
the opportunity to take his little mistress all night. When I enter the bar, I notice all the pirates playing a game of poker.

  “Well hello girly.” Rusty greets me with a smile.

  “Hey little angel.” Jack grins.

  I feel a hand grip my arm; I am twirled around and crushed into a firm, hard chest. Jax brings his lips down over mine, momentarily shocking me.

  “Hello to you too.” I blush.

  He kisses me again. “How you doin baby girl?”

  “Just brilliant now.” I melt inside, baby girl, seriously?

  We turn and the whole crew is staring; wide eyed at Jax’s greeting. I am guessing it is not something he does often.

  “Join us lass, meet the rest of the crew.”

  I notice another twenty or so pirates; sitting or standing around the huge table. Three are females, the rest all males. I take note of the females; the first has glasses and long black hair. She seems to be in her late thirties, maybe early forties. She has a kind face and smiles warmly at me. The girl sitting beside her, is younger, maybe twenty five or so. She is pretty; with blonde hair, grey eyes and pale skin. The third is a rather large, orange haired, sharp looking girl.

  “Crew, this is Jade. The princess next door,” Jax announces loudly. “Jade, this is my crew.”

  “Nice to meet you all.”

  “I’m Sam,” Smiles the blonde haired girl, “We have heard a lot about you.”

  “All good, I hope.” I laugh.

  “Of course, you are popular around here.”

  “I’m glad.”

  “I am Margy,” Says the older woman. “Nice to meet a real life princess.”

  “I am glad it makes someone happy.”

  She laughs. “You can always sneak over here, anytime you like.”

  “Thanks.”

  “That’s Gazelle, she has her nose out of joint because Jax has his eyes elsewhere.” She says, laughing at Gazelle who grumbles under her breath.

  “Ohhh…she is one of your women,” I grin, turning to Jax. “Bad taste pirate.”

  He chuckles. “I take what I can get out at sea.”

  “And on land?”

  He grasps my hair. “I only take the prettiest.”

  “I suppose I fit then?”

  “You more than fit.”

  I blush and look away.

  “So, what’s on the agenda tonight boys?” I ask.

  “Drinking lovely.” Rusty answers.