“Lorenzo…”
“No talking.”
“But…”
“But nothing, unless you want it like that. Up to you, J. Which hole?”
I laugh, shaking my head but then gasp when his tongue licks up the front of my neck.
“I...Enzo…”
“Take off your panties.”
I nod, self-control out the window as I reach between us, slipping my underwear down my legs and pull up my nightgown over my head, tossing it to the floor. Lorenzo follows, pulling down his shorts and our breaths are heavy and desperate.
We paw at each other now, the awkwardness and tension shattered as our desire is the only thing leading us. In seconds, his thick cock pushes inside me and I gasp, gripping the back of his neck as I lift my thighs up over his hips, locking my ankles behind his back.
“Ohhh God, yessss,” I pant. “Right there. Harder, please.”
“Fuck, Jenna you feel so good,” Lorenzo pants. "I've missed you. God, I've fucking missed you."
His elbows dig into the mattress above my shoulders and his hips unleash against my body, pumping fast and hard into me, his teeth coming down against my ear lobe.
“Fuck, faster. Faster, don’t stop,” I plead.
And he doesn’t. I come with a violent twitch, a death grip on his neck as my thighs clench around him, my inner walls keeping him hostage. He continues, hard, fast pumps as another wave crashes into me and I feel my whole body shaking uncontrollably.
“Lorenzo!” I gasp.
“One. More,” he growls between thrusts.
I shake my head, squeezing my eyes shut, unable to give him anything else as my body starts to slip into a state of blissful relaxation.
"C-come," I stutter. "Come, now, Lorenzo. I can't...take...much more."
Lorenzo rotates his hips and I gasp, my eyes widening at the sensation again and a cry is ripped from my body as I feel him tense and release inside me. Our heavy breathing is the only sound in the room and then everything comes barreling back to me, paralyzing me.
I softly push Lorenzo’s chest, as he leans up, slipping out of me and the loss hurts more than it should.
"You wanna talk about anything?"
I shake my head, taking the sheet and wrapping it around myself as I walk to my dresser and pull out a t-shirt and shorts.
"How about our signin' in a few weeks?" I offer.
"That's it?"
I exhale, finish getting dressed and I turn back toward him.
"Enzo, I need to clear my head and I gotta do that by myself. I need more time."
He stands from my bed, pulling his shorts on and walks to me, gripping my shoulders.
"Why can’t we just see where this goes, Jenna? Why won't you let me be there for you?"
"It's complicated."
"Why? The distance? You want me to move to Nashville? I will."
His voice is so soothing as he cups my cheek and I almost give in until I remember the nightmare I had again last night. I need help. I’m not going to be able to sift through this on my own.
"Lorenzo, I can't."
"Why? You want this, right?"
"I...do, I just…" I sigh, shaking my head.
"Then just tell me, dammit. I have a right to know why you’re fighting me."
"You wouldn't understand!"
"Try me."
"Just...let it go."
"I can't, Jenna. What the hell happened to you? Where did you go these past few weeks?"
I turn away from him, crossing my arms over my chest. I knew I'd have to tell him eventually, but I'm still dealing with it. It's hard to let go of years and years of guilt and self-doubt in just a few weeks.
"Jenna…"
“I went to see my father,” I whisper.
I don’t turn around, I don’t wait for Lorenzo to speak, I just take a break and finally let him inside.
“He...told me everything. Why he left, why he didn’t come back. I...I met his new family. I needed...I needed to know why. I needed to know why a man that was supposed to love me no matter what, could leave me. How could I have a boyfriend or a husband when my own…”
I press my lips together and shake my head, gritting my teeth, willing myself not to cry.
“He’s a jackass, Jenna. So is your mother. You are incredible, I hope you know that.”
He doesn’t touch me, just stays behind me and I’m grateful for it. If he touched me right now, I would break down.
“I pretty much drove him away,” I laugh, in an attempt to cover my cry. “I tried these past few weeks to get to know him but I couldn’t. When I was little he said he drank, he did drugs and the same thing happened to my mama. Maybe if they didn’t have me they—”
“Jenna, don’t—”
“She didn’t wanna see me,” I cry. “I found out she was in Knoxville and my father called her, wantin’ to meet with her and me and she...she didn’t wanna see me.”
“Fuck, Jenna. I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you tell me? I would have gone with you.”
He touches me now, rubbing his thumb along the back of my shoulder blades but I don’t turn around.
“I needed to do this on my own. That’s...that’s not all. I...I went back to my hometown. I needed to...to…”
I inhale, torn between breaking down and trying to continue this story and Lorenzo’s thumb along the skin on the back of my neck calms me.
"Five years ago...my boyfriend...my boyfriend was...killed...because of me."
I feel his hands on my shoulders trying to turn me around now, but I can't face him. I shrug him off and take a step away, breathing in deeply, knowing this is going to be a lot harder to hear than a failed parental relationship.
"Jenna…"
"L-let me just get it out, okay?"
I glance at him over my shoulder and he nods, taking a step away and sitting on the edge of my bed.
"I...was supposed to be the DD but I was meetin' his friends for the first time and I...got too drunk to drive. Fynn wasn’t drunk but he did have a few and it was rainin' and…"
I sniffle, rubbing my nose with the back of my hand as I close my eyes.
"He saw the car too late and tried to avoid it and swerved. We...we tumbled for so damn long and I...I couldn't save him. I was right there and I couldn’t...I couldn't save him."
My voice cracks as the tears start to stream down my cheeks.
"He begged for me to...to save him but..I...my leg was stuck and I...I...couldn't…"
"Hey, hey, it’s okay," Lorenzo soothes, as he wraps an arm around my body.
"No! No, it’s not. I’m gonna do the same thing to you, don't you see? The same thing I did to my parents! Everyone I love disappears from my life, Lorenzo and I won’t let that happen to us." My voice started out strong, like I meant every single world I said but it ends on a whisper. I can't put any strength behind words I don't want to believe. "I...I need you too much.”
My eyes close and my head feels fuzzy as I grip Lorenzo's t-shirt to keep from falling.
"Hey, you are never going to lose me. You hear me? Come to bed, you look like you’re going to pass out."
I don't fight him because he's right, I feel like shit. Lorenzo lifts me up off my feet, carrying me back to my bed and my brain shuts off before I'm even tucked into bed.
Chapter 15
Lorenzo
I watch as Jenna squirms in bed, fisting the sheets and groaning and I know she’s having another nightmare. I kneel down on the floor next to the bed, gripping her hand, running my thumb along the space between her pointer finger and thumb.
“Jenna, you’re okay. It’s Lorenzo,” I whisper.
“No!” she yells. “Don’t take him! Don’t take him!”
She thrashes against the sheets and I softly shake her, running my fingers through her damp hair.
“Wake up, J. Wake up.”
She gasps, sitting up in bed as her eyes scan the room quickly, finally landing on me. She cups my cheeks, taking me off guard
and then drops her head to my chest, crying.
“Oh God, Lorenzo, make it stop. Make it stop, please,” she cries.
“Jenna, what is it? Tell me what it is.”
“You...it’s you in that car with me and I...I can’t...forget. I need to forget…”
I cradle her to my chest, slipping into bed beside her and hold her until her crying subsides and her breathing evens out.
I exhale, not knowing what the fuck to do to help her. Hearing her whole past last night, I can’t believe she’s held all that sadness inside of her. She’s contagious and fun and always so positive, I can’t imagine being abandoned at such a young age and then witnessing the person you love dying right before your eyes. I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to stay strong for her.
I don’t realize I fell asleep until I’m jerked awake by Jenna running to her bathroom, the sound of her vomiting echoing off her bathroom walls.
“Fuck.”
I scramble to my feet, rushing to the bathroom as I reach for her hair and hold it back.
“Don’t,” she groans. “This is disgustin’. Go back in the bedroom.”
She vomits again, dry heaving as she moans in pain.
“I’m not going anywhere. This isn’t just from drinking, is it?”
She shakes her head, reaching for a tissue as she wipes her mouth and stands.
“I feel like I’m on fire. I think I’m gettin’ sick. You should go. Emily and Danny are probably wonderin’ where you are.”
“Hell no. If you’re sick, I’m definitely not leaving you. Take a bath and I’ll order you some soup. Any place in particular you like?”
She shakes her head as she puts the lid of the toilet down and sits.
“Koji downtown is pretty good but I ain’t hungry.”
“Well you have to eat something, you have nothing in your stomach right now. I’ll grab some gatorade too. Here, let me.”
I reach for her hand, lifting her arms as I take off her t-shirt and pull her to stand. She obliges as I turn on the hot water quickly to fill the tub and finish stripping her down, pressing my lips to her forehead.
“Relax, okay? Where are your bath bombs?”
She smiles, pressing her lips together and I see the shine in her green eyes.
“They...they’re under the sink,” she whispers.
I nod, walking over to the vanity and take a bath bomb out, bringing it to the tub as I help her in, watching her beautiful body disappear beneath the bubbles.
“Yell if you need me, okay?” I say, brushing her hair off her forehead as I hand her the bath bomb.
She nods and I walk out of the bathroom, not shutting the door all the way as I grab my phone and order some food to be delivered.
Danny and Emily are next as I press the call button and wait for them to pick up.
"There he is. Jenna okay?" Danny answers.
"I think she’s coming down with something, I dont think it's the alcohol. I'm gonna spend the night here again, are you guys good?"
"Hell yeah man, we're good. Nashville is a blast. Keep us updated, okay?" Danny responds.
"Will do. Enjoy "
I hang up, walking down the hall to the kitchen to make some toast in the meantime when I hear my phone chime.
Ma: How's Nashville? I'm assuming no phone calls means it's going good?
I smile, typing out my reply.
Me: Jenna isn't feeling too good so just laying low.
Ma: I hope you're taking care of her.
Me: Did you raise me any other way? Of course I am.
Ma: Good. Give her my love. See you in a few days.
I look around her kitchen as I wait for the toast to be ready. Everything is in its place. I noticed that when we stayed at the cabin a few weeks back. She likes her organization and cleanliness. She would have a heart attack if she visited my apartment.
I laugh, walking into her living room and make my way to the pictures on her mantle. She has a black and white photo of a little girl with her parents and despite the black and white, I can make out those clear green eyes and my heart pounds in my chest. This must have been right before her father left. She looks so young, so vulnerable and I can't picture ever leaving that little girl. How could he have done that? What kind of fucking man does that?
I grit my teeth but then the next picture eases my anger. Jenna is in a blue cap and gown sandwiched between two other girls with a big smile on her face holding up her diploma.
I hear the toast pop out of the toaster, butter both slices, then make my way back to the bathroom.
I set the toast down on the counter as I watch Jenna's toe turn the water on and off in the tub.
"Feeling better?"
"A little, yeah. Is that for me?"
I nod, cupping her face.
"Let me wash you up and then you can eat."
She doesn't protest as I grab her sponge and fill it with soap, lifting her out of the bathtub and walking us near her shower. I turn it on, stripping out of my own clothes and she watches with hooded eyes.
"None of that," I laugh, pushing her into the shower as I let the warm water cascade down her gorgeous body.
I watch as the water flows between her breasts, her eyes closing in blissful peace as she leans her head back, showcasing her delicious neck. I start to glide her sponge along her body, slowly cleaning every inch of her as she rolls her neck from side to side, sighing at the sensation.
"This feels amazing," she whispers.
I soap my hands up, gingerly moving them between her legs as she flinches, gripping my shoulder with her fingers.
"Easy. I did a shit job taking care of you before. Let me do it now."
She takes a few seconds and nods as I rub my soapy fingers through her folds, moving them back and forth, feeling her thighs squeezing together.
I planned on just washing her, but when she moves her hips, causing my finger to slide into her as I'm moving it down to continue cleaning her, her moan snaps all that control to pieces.
I watch her eyes squeeze tighter, her top teeth digging into her plump bottom lip as I add another finger, using my thumb to work her clit.
"Enzo."
My name is a gasp, a plea off her lips and I answer her, dipping my head low to take a nipple into my mouth.
She groans, digging her fingers into the back of my head as she guides my head to the other nipple, needy and sexy as fuck.
"Yes," she hisses. "Like that. Right there. I'm close."
I suck harder on her nipple, adding a third finger as I gently push her against the tile wall and go to work on her. My fingers move fast, my thumb is punishing her sensitive bud and she cries into the side of my neck, biting my rapid pulse.
"God, that felt amazin'," she gasps, leaning her head back against the wall to look at me.
Her smile is lazy and her eyelids are heavy as she reaches between us, grabbing my hard as fuck dick.
"Nuh-uh," I say, shaking my head as I remove her hand. "This was about you. Let's get you dried off, some toast in that belly and to sleep while we wait for the soup."
"But—"
"But nothing. I'm taking care of you, Jenna, not the other way around."
I shut off the water, stepping out of the shower as I reach for a towel and bring it back to her. I reach behind her shivering body, ring out her wet hair and wrap the towel around her as I grab another from next to me.
I see the brush on the counter, gently brushing through her wet hair as I watch her face in the mirror.
Her eyes close as she leans her head back just the slightest and I make sure to ease through the knots. Her cheeks are pinker now, the ghostly white color she was sporting this morning now turning into an orgasmic glow.
All of my life, I've gotten what I wanted, so this push I'm getting from her is foreign to me. I'm a workhorse though, not ever giving up on something I want and that includes Jenna. This is what I want to do every night, every morning, every day. She is who I want.
I run my fingers
through her hair, twisting it into a braid before drying myself and wrapping my towel around my waist.
I sense her staring and look up at her, seeing her mouth parted.
"What's the matter?"
"You brushed and braided my hair."
I furrow my brows, confused.
"Was I not supposed to do that?"
"No, you just...I always do that after my shower...put it in a braid."
"I know. Whenever we video at night and at the cabin I always noticed it was in a braid."
She presses her lips together and then nods as we walk out into her bedroom, the plate of toast in my hands.
"Here, eat this. Let me get you some clothes."
I pass her the plate, making her sit on the edge of her bed before I rummage around in her drawers.
"Ya know when you said 'eat this', this is not what I thought you meant."
I look over my shoulder at her and she's smirking, taking a bite out of the toast with her eyes still on me.
"Are we ever gonna talk about it or you just gonna throw sex over it?”
I walk over to her, putting her clothes on the bed next to her and she sighs.
“I’m fucked up, what do you wanna talk about?”
“Us. Are you ever gonna give this a real shot?”
“Enzo, I love what we have. I love it so fuckin’ much and if anything were to happen to this, I would never be able to survive it.”
“Why are you already plotting our ending when we didn’t even get out of the first chapter yet?” I whisper, cupping her cheek and lifting her face to me.
“Because I already know how it ends. I’ve read the story so many times.”
“This isn’t the same, Jenna. I’m not your father or mother or Fynn, I’m me. I’ll never leave you.”
She stands, pushing against my hands, gripping the top of her towel.
“And sometimes things are out of your control, Lorenzo! I’m sure Fynn wasn’t plannin’ on leavin’ me either but look what happened to him? It doesn’t matter if you want to or not, I’m the problem. Nothin’ bad has happened to any of my friends so that’s where I’m keepin’ you.”
I grit my teeth, wanting to tell her to stop being a fucking coward but she’s hurting and I get it. I may not like it, I may not agree but I have no idea where she is coming from. My parents love me, I have an amazing sister and friends and I never had anyone ripped away from me like she has.
Bestselling Bastard : A Hero Club Novel Page 17