Mac (Winter - Shifter Seasons Book 3)

by Harmony Raines

  “My mom shut down to start with. It was as if she couldn’t really function. Even getting out of bed in the morning took great effort. I sometimes wonder if she hadn’t had us boys, whether she’d have even bothered.” Mac pressed his lips into a thin line.

  “But she did have you.” Saffron placed a hand on his back and he shuddered, longing to hold her in his arms and kiss her lips.

  “And Nina and the boys have you.” Mac looked at her over his shoulder. “And I know that is not going to change. I know they are part of your life and you want to care for them in the same way I cared for my brothers and my mom.”

  “Nina thinks she should give me my freedom.” A small smile twitched at the corners of her mouth but Saffron didn’t smile. “I told her you are okay with them living here with us.” Her forehead wrinkled. “I don’t think they can manage on their own. Not yet.”

  Mac stopped as they reached her car and Saffron opened the trunk. “I’m here for them, too,” he assured her. “Whatever they need.”

  “What they need is answers about Evan.” She sighed. “But I doubt that is ever going to happen.”

  “What answers?” Mac reached into the trunk of the car and grabbed a couple of backpacks that belonged to the boys while Saffron grasped her overnight bag and one belonging to Nina.

  “Evan died in a snowstorm as he and his mountain rescue crew attempted to lead a group of hikers to safety. His body was never recovered. So, there was really no closure for Nina. I think that’s what haunts her. It’s as if she’s scared that he’s lost somewhere in the mountains and can’t find his way home.” She hitched one bag on each shoulder and then shut the trunk. “Which is why we came here to Bear Creek. She has it in her head that this is where he would come since he was born and raised here.”

  “I had no idea.” Mac mulled over this new information. “Didn’t they search for his body?”

  “Yes, they did a thorough search, but the weather was so bad that they’re still not sure if the snow and ice just buried him. Or he could have slipped into a deep crevice.” She sighed. “So many outcomes except the one that Nina needs.”

  “The one that Nina needs?” Mac asked.

  “Yeah, finding the body,” Saffron answered.

  “The one Nina needs is finding Evan himself.” Mac’s mind whirred as he imagined what it would be like to be lost in the mountains with no way home. Surely, Evan could never forget the pull of his mate or the feel of her in his arms.

  “Don’t!” Saffron said sharply, putting her finger to his lips. “Don’t ever say that in front of the boys.”

  “You don’t want to give them false hope.” Mac could understand that, but surely false hope was better than no hope. “And Nina?”

  “I don’t think she’ll ever accept Evan is dead unless she has actual proof. But she’s learning to live with it. She’s gotten so much better.” Saffron glanced toward the house as if she were afraid Nina might hear.

  “One step at a time. That’s how my mom got through it.” Mac wished he could say or do something more.

  We could find Evan, his bear suggested.

  If only it was that simple, Mac replied.

  “She is getting better, slowly. At first, Nina wouldn’t admit that Evan was gone. She would sit in her living room watching the front yard expecting him to walk back into their lives. She didn’t move. She even slept there in the same chair.” Saffron’s voice faltered. “She barely spoke to the boys and certainly didn’t have it in her to care for them.”

  “So you cared for them.” Mac understood Saffron’s need to care for the people she loved. His love for his mate grew, they were similar on so many levels.

  “I did. But my mom started talking about how Nina needed help and she might be better in a place where she could get help.” Saffron’s tone changed. “My mom said that she would raise the boys. And got an attorney involved.”

  “Your mom?” Mac couldn’t comprehend how Saffron’s mom would want to break up a mother and her children like that.

  “She’s a complicated person. Very successful in business but her private life is a disaster. Although, she won’t take the blame for it. She always said my father walked out on her because she could only give him daughters. When he remarried, he had two fine sons and barely had any contact with me or Nina. Which convinced my mother that she was right.” Saffron dashed her hand across her eyes. “Uh, sorry.”

  Mac transferred the backpacks to one hand and slipped his free arm around Saffron. “Don’t be sorry. This is why I’m here, to help you any way I can.”

  “I wish you could help.” She looked up at him, her eyes filled with sadness. “The one thing I need, for my sister, is the one thing no one can help me with.”

  “I might not be able to bring Evan back, but I can help you all get through this. I can be there for you all. If Nina needs to talk to someone, I’ll ask around for referrals. If the boys need help with shifting, then I’ll be there for them. So will Hex and Beck.” He looked deep into her eyes, wishing he could wipe away the sadness he saw there. However, he knew from experience that the emotions Saffron was feeling couldn’t be swept away. She needed to work her way through it and find her way to the other side.

  We can be her guiding light, his bear said.

  “You’re here right now and that is everything to me,” she confessed. “I’ve been alone.”

  “Not anymore.” He hugged her close as she sobbed into his jacket. “I didn’t mean to make you cry. I wanted this to be a special evening for you all.”

  “It has been,” Saffron told him. As she looked up, her eyes red-rimmed from crying, she added, “Thanks for letting me offload on you.”

  “I have broad shoulders.” He shrugged them as they turned and walked the short distance to the house.

  “You have. It was the first thing I noticed about you,” she teased.

  “You didn’t notice my handsome face first?” Mac asked.

  “No.” She frowned and peered closer. “Nope.”

  “It was your dimples for me,” Mac admitted.

  “Oh, no.” She sounded shocked. “I have a love-hate relationship with my dimples.”

  “I just love them,” Mac told her.

  “You did not spend your whole life being called cute because your cheeks pucker when you smile.” He opened the door for her, and they entered the kitchen.

  “Is Saffron complaining about her cute dimples again?” The hot chocolate seemed to have revived Nina.

  “I’m not complaining, I just don’t think they are my best feature.” Saffron placed the bags on an empty chair. “Okay, there we go.”

  “Shall I show you to the guest rooms?” Mac suggested. “We can get you all settled before everyone else comes home.”

  “Do they know we’re here?” Saffron suddenly asked. Had Mac invited them all over after his family had left? “I don’t want them to think we’re imposing.”

  “I texted Beck and he told the others. They are looking forward to meeting you all,” Mac confirmed. “And my mom can’t wait to meet Wes and Jonas.”

  “Wait until she’s spent some time with them,” Nina said. “She might change her mind.”

  “Mom!” Jonas frowned at his mom.

  “You’ll have to prove me wrong,” Nina joked.

  “Is that your attempt at reverse psychology?” Saffron leaned in and whispered.

  “Was it that obvious?” Nina asked her sister as she took Saffron’s hand and stood up. “I think I can manage, although I’m probably going to hit the hay soon.”

  “Whenever you need to go to bed, that’s fine,” Mac told Nina. “You can meet everyone tomorrow.”

  “Thanks, Mac. I don’t want to appear antisocial since you’ve been kind enough to let us stay.” Nina took a deep breath and stood on her own. “Lead the way.”

  “Through here,” Mac said, and they all trooped out of the kitchen. “We have a downstairs guest room with an adjoining bathroom that I thought would be easier for N
ina.”

  He walked along a hallway and opened the door at the end. They all followed their host inside, and Nina’s eyes lit up when she saw the bed and a comfortable sofa that was positioned in front of a large window that stretched from floor to ceiling.

  “It’s a pity it’s dark.” Saffron went to the window and put her hands against the glass and peered out. “This room has its own private veranda.” She looked over her shoulder at Nina. “You can sit here in the morning and enjoy the sun.”

  “Just pull the handle and open it up,” Mac told them.

  Saffron curled her fingers around the door handle and tugged. The window slid open easily. “You’ll have no problem with this,” she assured her sister. “This would be a great place for you to sit and read.”

  Nina gave a lopsided smile. “We’re only here for one night,” she reminded her sister.

  “You can stay as long as you want.” Mac caught Saffron’s eye. Had he said the wrong thing? “It’s up to you guys.”

  “I’d like to stay forever,” Jonas said excitedly.

  “You haven’t seen your room yet,” Wes told him bluntly.

  “Who cares about a room when there is all the forest outside?” Jonas asked. “When we can both shift, we can go from here through the trees and up into the mountains.”

  “You aren’t going to shift for a couple of years,” Wes reminded his younger brother.

  “You don’t know that,” Nina said. “Your father shifted a year earlier than his brother. Jonas could be the same.”

  “So there.” Jonas refrained from sticking his tongue out. He was old enough to know better.

  “Hey, you two,” Saffron pulled the boys toward her. “You both normally behave better than this.”

  Wes looked mutinous as he looked at Jonas. “Some people should learn to keep their mouths shut.”

  Saffron straightened her back and her eyes darted to Nina’s before she looked down at Wes. “Why don’t we go and look at your room?”

  “Do we have to share?” Wes asked curtly.

  “No, but your rooms are next to each other,” Mac told them. He glanced at Saffron before he led them from the room. His mate looked troubled, which troubled him.

  There is tension between Wes and Jonas, his bear agreed. And Saffron knows why.

  But she hasn’t told Nina, Mac added.

  “Do you think you can manage the stairs?” Saffron asked Nina as they reached the bottom of the staircase.

  “The rooms are on the top floor,” Mac added. “Sorry, I hadn’t thought this through.”

  “Don’t be silly, Mac. You have been more than thoughtful. You all go and take a look while I enjoy a nice, quiet nap.” Nina waved them away. “A little rest will set me right and then I can come and say hello when your family gets home.”

  “Do you want me to stay with you?” Saffron asked.

  “No, you go.” Nina had already turned back toward the downstairs guest room, walking as if she were walking on eggshells. Mac’s concern for Saffron’s sister grew.

  If only we could help her, his bear said sadly.

  We can only help her if we find Evan. Mac led them upstairs. There was nothing he could do to help the family tonight except diffuse the mood between the two boys and make sure Saffron and Nina had whatever they needed.

  “Another flight of stairs?” Wes asked, his mood shifting as they climbed the stairs.

  “Yep, these two rooms are in the roof. The ceilings are low but the views out across the forest and the mountains are incredible. When you get up in the morning, you can look out at the mountains and as soon as the weather changes and the days get longer, we can go and explore them.” Mac looked at the two boys, they both looked happy at the prospect of exploring the wilderness surrounding the house.

  “Saffron said you own the forest around the sawmill and it’s huge,” Wes said.

  “I do and it is. I’ll teach you how to navigate the forest if you want,” Mac offered.

  “With a compass?” Jonas asked as he hauled himself up on the handrail.

  “With a compass and also by using the landmarks and reading the signs nature leaves for us.” Mac longed to share what his own father had taught him when he was a boy. Passing on things he’d learned to a new generation helped ease his own longing for a child.

  We might still have a child of our own, his bear said.

  Mac finally reached the top of the second staircase which opened onto a large landing. Three doors led off the landing, one to a small bathroom and the others opened up into two almost identical rooms.

  “Does this mean there won’t be any arguments?” Saffron asked as Mac swung open both doors.

  “Maybe,” Wes answered, giving Mac a brief glimpse of a smile. There was so much of Wes he kept hidden, buried underneath guilt and confusion. Mac could relate to him on so many levels. Meeting Nina and the boys had brought long-buried emotions to the surface, reminding him vividly of the first months and years after his father died.

  “You can choose,” Jonas told his brother magnanimously.

  “I was going to let you choose,” Wes answered.

  “We’re not going to argue over who gets to choose, are we?” Saffron asked in disappointment.

  Mac chuckled. “No, they aren’t.” He placed one hand on each of the boy’s shoulders. “Because they are going to start acting like young men, not children.”

  Wes and Jonas both looked at Mac who raised an eyebrow. “Come on, I’ve been you. My brothers and I always found something to argue about. If we wanted to. But at some point, you will realize that family is the most important thing and your brother will always be there for you.”

  Jonas smiled at Wes. “I’ll take the left room.”

  Wes nodded. “I’ll take the right.”

  The two boys went into their rooms and Saffron went to Mac and stood by his side. “I bow to your experience of boys and shifters.”

  “Teenage years are hard. Particularly when you’re a shifter. Being on the cusp of your first shift sends your hormones into overdrive. I know how I felt and then I saw my brothers go through the same thing.” He slid his arm around her shoulders. “But then we come out on the other side.”

  “And I think you did okay on the other side,” Saffron told him.

  “Much better since I met you.” He brushed his lips across hers but before their kiss deepened, he sensed the arrival of the rest of his family. “I should show you your room.”

  “Aren’t I sleeping in your room?” Saffron asked in surprise.

  “Yes, and I’ll sleep on the sofa downstairs,” Mac told her.

  “That’s disappointing.” She placed her hand on his chest. His heart hammered so hard he was certain she would be able to feel it as blood pumped through his veins. His senses were heightened, and it was all he could do to contain his bear.

  “I didn’t want you to think…” He gave her a lopsided grin. “I would not argue if you wanted to share my bed.”

  “I do.” She cupped his face in her hands and kissed his lips, leaving him in no doubt that they would not only be sleeping in his bed.

  Maybe he should make an excuse to his family and go straight to bed without joining them downstairs first.

  If only, his bear added.

  Chapter Sixteen – Saffron

  “How are you feeling?” Saffron crept into the guest room to find her sister lying on the bed, her eyes fixed on the ceiling.

  “I’m okay.” Nina lifted her head and then turned onto her side. “Now that I’ve warmed up, I’m feeling better.”

  “It’s so quiet here.” Saffron went to the window and looked into the darkness. She couldn’t see more than a couple of feet in front of her, but it was as if she could feel the emptiness surrounding them. No cars. Just trees.

  “Not so quiet when there are two teenagers in the house.” Nina smiled and swung her legs over the side of the bed as Wes and Jonas ran down the stairs.

  “They like it here.” Saffron turned away
from the window and went to her sister.

  “And you like Mac.” Nina arched an eyebrow and smiled knowingly at Saffron. “I want you to be happy. I want the boys to be happy. If that means we all live here together, I’m okay with that.” She sighed as she looked over her shoulder toward the window. “More than okay.”

  “There’s a but coming.” Saffron offered Nina her arm and helped her off the bed.

  “But I want you to promise me that if at any time you want the house and your mate to yourself, you’ll tell me.” Nina took a moment to get her balance before she let go of Saffron and walked toward the door.

  “I promise,” Saffron replied solemnly. “But you know how much I love you guys and I want you to be happy, and I want to watch my nephews grow into the amazing young men I know they will be.”

  “Once Wes has grown up just a little. Sometimes I look at him and think he’s reverting to his toddler years.” Nina wiped her hand over her eyes, looking tired and drawn. “I think he’s finally coming down off the high he pushed himself into after his dad disappeared. He misses him more now when he’s on the cusp of shifting for the first time than ever before.”

  “Did they used to talk about what it would be like for them to shift together and venture out as bears?” Saffron asked. She wasn’t quite used to talking about bears as if they were people, but it was less insane than when Nina had first told her about shifters.

  “They did. Evan said he would teach him to speak bear. That he would show him how to follow trails using his sense of smell alone. They had so many plans. And so did Jonas. I expect he’ll feel the same way when he is nearing his time to shift.” Nina reached for the door handle and pulled it open. “We have to make new plans.”

  “And Mac and his family are there for you all, too,” Saffron assured her sister as they went out of the guest bedroom to join the others.

  “It’s what the boys need. I want them to feel secure and loved by the people around them.” Nina glanced sideways at Saffron.

  “You mean not like Mom.” Saffron sighed as she wrapped her arms around Nina and held her close. “I’m sure Mom means well in her own way.”