by S. Nelson
Heather Dumont.
Just the sight of her boiled my blood. I’d been enjoying myself, trying to adopt a more optimistic approach toward my future only to be hauled back into the memories of the past—not as distant as I would’ve liked—as soon as I saw her saunter toward Ford and Owen.
How the hell was I supposed to move forward when I was reminded of the way I was before, shadows of memories cradling themselves around the edges of my mind, calling out for me to revert to my old ways? Not to get me wrong. I wasn’t saying that I’d become sweet ol’ Cara overnight, ready to jump into action and start doing good for the world, because I hadn’t. Rather, ever since my passion for creating a clothing line had sparked back to life, flashes of a more productive future swirled through the longing to party and laze about, dialing up my ambition a notch. Enough for me to see that if I put my mind to something, with hard work and dedication, I could achieve a goal I’d dreamed about when I was younger.
Anyway… I digressed.
Heather had expressed an interest in Ford when I’d run into her at the club we visited, No. 4, and I knew she’d somehow find an opportunity to sink her claws into him. I just didn’t think it’d be this soon or that I’d care enough about it to want to intercede. But I did, and as soon as possible.
A burning sensation erupted in the pit of my stomach and at first, I thought it was from something I’d eaten earlier, but I quickly dismissed the thought when I recalled only having eaten half a bagel. Besides, the sensation deepened the more I watched the interaction between Ford and Heather, the brazen bitch running her hand down his arm. He looked to be disinterested, but he always looked that way, so I couldn’t tell if he desired her or was annoyed with her.
When Ford hadn’t removed himself from her touch, spots danced in my vision, images of the two of them rolling around naked tortured me, so much so that I lost all train of rational thought and missed the moment he walked away from her, his feet propelling him straight toward me.
When I looked back at Heather, her head swiveled to the side in order to watch Ford walk away, her flirty smile disappearing as soon as she saw me and realized the man she was just hitting on had left her to join me. I swore if no one else was around, she would’ve screamed and stomped her foot, much like I would react if something hadn’t gone my way. Well, the old me. Although the old vs. new me hadn’t been put to the test yet, so I couldn’t say the prior version of myself had disappeared completely.
Small steps.
Before Ford reached us, I stepped closer to Cody and put my hand on his upper arm, just like Heather had done with Ford. I had no idea why I was trying to incite a reaction from the man walking toward me, but I did it just the same. Chalk it up to insecurity, or old behavior, or something else I didn’t understand, but my hand remained on Cody’s arm, the smile he flashed me when I touched him enough to make me feel ashamed for leading him on.
I saw the way the megastar watched me, and had it been a couple months prior I would’ve returned the attention. The guy was handsome with his thick, dark hair, bright green eyes, and a smile that could make any woman’s panties disappear. Add to the list that he was filthy rich, famous, and talented in the sack. Or so I’d heard, not having experienced him myself, obviously.
“Well, if you two will excuse me,” my dad said, “I have to go find your mother before she reads me the riot act for leaving her alone too long with those two.” He pointed toward my mother, and sure enough, she was sandwiched between two uppity looking women. And from where I stood, they screamed plastic surgery addicts. Lord only knew what they were talking about, but as soon as she saw my dad approach, I swore her chest deflated right before she smiled.
Once we were alone, Cody opened his mouth to speak but didn’t get the chance, because the same time Ford touched my lower back, Steph walked up next to me.
“Are you ready?” She wiggled her brows and grinned, reaching out to touch my arm.
“Ready for what?” Ford asked, standing so close I could smell the mint on his breath. The man barely gave me room to exist, let alone breathe.
“The auction.”
“What auction?” Cody finally spoke, although I doubted that was going to be the question he would’ve asked had both of them not walked up on us.
“Cara has graciously agreed to auction off a date with herself to help raise money tonight.”
“Really?” Cody’s question wasn’t posed as one, more of a surprised and exciting observation. I swore Ford growled, but I could’ve been mistaken. Not wanting to delve into entertaining his possible reaction to Cody’s interest, I took one step toward my friend and away from the two men.
“Yes. So, you better be bidding.” She pointed at the movie star before grabbing my hand and leading me across the room and toward the small stage.
When we finally stopped walking, I asked her something I should’ve when she first asked me to do this. “Is there anyone else auctioning off dates, or am I the only one?”
“A close friend of mine was going to participate but she came down with some sort of stomach bug at the last minute.” She looked down before meeting my eyes. “So, you’re the only one now.”
Gone was my familiar air of assuredness, the need to be the center of attention and doing anything to keep people’s focus on me. Out of nowhere, self-doubt took hold and shook me until my errant thoughts made me dizzy.
Did I look as good as I thought I did?
Would anyone want to bid on me?
Did anyone even care who I was?
Would they just see the daughter of Walter Dessoye, or would they see me?
Did they think I’d fuck them if they were the highest bidder?
Depending on who it was, would I do the deed?
How would Ford feel about all this?
Why did I care how he’d feel?
Emily pulled me into a side hug, surprising me enough I forgot all about my questions and appreciated her support. I hadn’t seen her walk up to us, but was grateful she had.
“Are you okay?” She sensed I was nervous. I saw it in her eyes and the strained smile she gave me.
“Yeah. Just hoping I don’t make a fool of myself.”
“You’ll cause so much of a bidding war, men will be fighting just to win the chance to take you out.” Her words were appreciated even though the sentiment was an embellishment. She leaned closer, “Although, whoever does win won’t get much time alone with you because if Ford acts the way he is now, I doubt the poor guy will stick around until dessert.” She laughed, but I found nothing funny about what she said.
I zeroed in on Ford, who wasn’t standing far from where we were. Not shocking. He looked like he was ready for a fight and not someone who was supposed to have blended into the crowd. Stoic expression and rigid posture didn’t make for an approachable person.
While part of me tired of his outlandish reactions to almost every situation involving me, I kind of liked he cared so much. What exactly he cared so deeply about was still a mystery, however. Was he jealous over the attention I received from other men? Because that was what it looked like sometimes. Or did he only care that he had to follow me around so much? I was sure I wasn’t an easy client. Not by any means.
Ford walked away from Cody to rejoin Owen. The two of them looked like they were holding up the corner wall, their focus solely on me and Emily.
Cody wandered through the crowd and mingled with some of his peers, laughing as if his safety hadn’t just been in question, my shadow looking like he was ready to pounce on him given the right prompt to do so.
Ten minutes later, after I freshened up, Steph walked to the microphone in the center of the stage and called for everyone’s attention.
Tamping down my nervousness, I forced a smile and took a deep breath.
* * *
Cara
“I want to thank you all for coming this evening to help support a cause that has unfortunately affected my family.” Steph went on to retell the details of h
er mother’s cancer, each word she spoke full of sadness but hope, as her mother had been in remission for quite some time.
Her speech hit me hard, the anguish in her voice reminding me to be grateful that my family and I were healthy. I often took for granted that my parents would always be there, that Emily would always be around. Assuming we would all die when we reached the age of one hundred. I realized life didn’t work that way, but I ignored reality for as long as I could remember because I refused to face the possibility of the alternative.
Trust me, I knew bad things happened. I was proof, but how I chose to deal with the aftermath spurred the way my life unfolded. The partying. The drugs. The random hookups. The I-don’t-care-about-anything-but-right-now attitude. Everything over the past decade had shaped the person I became, but the problem was I no longer wanted to walk that path.
“And now for some fun. My good friend Cara Dessoye has offered to auction off a date with herself to help generate even more money for cancer research.” The sound of the applause spurred my brain to focus on the present. “Cara is the daughter of Walter Dessoye, our most favorite director of all time.” My dad waved to everyone when she pointed to him across the room, his smile genuine and appreciative of her compliment. He received praises often and by many, yet he remained humble through it all. His fame and fortune had never gone to his head, much like it had to mine. My mom leaned in to kiss his cheek, her glow emanating the love she held for him.
“And while she takes after her father in the way of creativity, it is in a completely different realm.” She waved me closer, clasping my hand in hers, a comforting gesture I didn’t know I needed. “Cara is a gifted designer, one who is going to explode onto the fashion scene very soon.” She released my hand, and with a gentle shove forward, she continued singing my praises. “She made the outfit she’s wearing tonight.” I heard a collective murmur of delight, the crowd’s approval turning my cheeks pink. All eyes were on me, and for some reason, I wasn’t prepared.
I loved to be the center of attention, often going out of my way to ensure I held the limelight, stole it from everyone around me. But right then, with my passion uncovered, I was exposed and vulnerable, an occurrence I wasn’t used to.
Smiling, looking at Emily for encouragement and support, I tried to live in the moment. Soak it up for what it was, which was helping out a great cause, and assisting an old friend all at the same time.
“Cara is obviously gorgeous.” A barrage of whistles assaulted my ears. “And smart,” Steph continued, “driven and passionate. So, all you available men better play your cards right tonight and get out that checkbook.”
Most of the people in attendance knew who I was. A famous director’s daughter. A socialite. And whatever else they’d read or seen about me. I only hoped they didn’t hold my past against me.
I grinned wider, and it had nothing to do with what was going on right then. It was because I was going to start making changes in my life to improve myself and to start living in a more positive and productive way. I wasn’t delusional to think I’d change overnight, but I sure as hell was going to try to do better. My attitude wasn’t going to disappear altogether, but I would attempt to curb it, to be more conscious of what came flying out of my mouth.
I searched the crowd for Ford, but didn’t have to look long because he hadn’t moved, standing off to the left, close by as was his protocol. His hand rested on the back of his neck, his gaze bouncing from me to Owen to my dad then back to me. I had no idea what thoughts ran through his mind, and my curiosity to find out should’ve annoyed me, but it didn’t. When he caught my stare, I swore he stood straighter, lowering his arm to his side only for both of his hands to disappear inside his pants pockets. He did that a lot and his stance was yet another thing I wanted to ask about.
“Although time spent with Cara is priceless, we have to start somewhere.” Steph walked up next to me, her closeness easing some of my anxiety.
What if no one bid? What if only one person did, and it wasn’t for much money? I didn’t have time to think of more what-ifs before my friend rattled off the opening price. “Let’s start off with one thousand dol—” She didn’t get a chance to finish her sentence before someone shouted a counter amount.
“Ten-thousand dollars.” Everyone in the crowd, including myself and Steph sought out who’d made the offer. It was Alfred Nubble, a composer who’d worked on several of my father’s films. He’d even won two acclaimed awards for his work. Thing was, Alfred was publicly gay, so his offer had come as a surprise, until I thought about the reason why he’d done so. If memory served me right, his sister had died of cancer a few years back.
“Okay.” Steph laughed. “Ten-thousand dollars, it is. Thank you, good sir. Does anyone want to go higher?” We didn’t have to wait long to find out the answer.
“Fifteen thousand.” That bid came from a different male voice. Cody Caverly. He stood in the middle of some of his friends, who also happened to be actors. When I looked his way, he waved before winking at me, his smile infectious.
“Twenty thousand.” There was no mistaking that voice.
“Um… Mr. Dessoye. I’m not sure that’s how this works?” Steph was a good sport, ribbing my dad over his bid. I could admit it was odd, but I wasn’t surprised he shouted it out.
“And I’m not so sure I want anyone here taking out my little girl.” The crowd laughed, but I was mortified. Okay, maybe I wasn’t so much mortified as I was slightly embarrassed.
I grabbed the microphone from my friend. “I’m sure whoever wins will be on their best behavior.”
“They better be,” he half threatened, all while smiling big and hugging my mom close. She smiled right along with him, and I had to admit that unfortunately, it had been too long since I’d seen them both relaxed and having fun, and all while I was present. My hope was for more of this kind of scene in the near future.
“Twenty-five thousand.” That time the bid came from a guy named Blair Cooper, who just so happened to be one of Cody’s buddies. Watching the interaction between them almost made me forget I was standing on a stage, auctioning myself off for charity. Blair was a few inches shorter than Cody and leaner, but his weight was due to a prior role he played where he’d had to lose thirty pounds to play a Jewish prisoner during World War II. He wasn’t as handsome as Cody, but he was attractive all the same. I’d met him on a few occasions, and he was friendly and polite, so if he was the one to win that evening, I wouldn’t be disappointed.
Okay, maybe a little disappointed, seeing as how Cody had thrown his name into the ring, so to speak. If I was going to go out with someone, he may as well be the man of the hour. The hotshot. The bad boy meets die-hard romantic. Sure, those were the characters he’d played, but wasn’t it true that an actor poured a portion of their true selves into every character? If that was false, then at least he was nice to look at, and from the brief conversation we’d had earlier, he was charming and funny.
My thoughts about Cody made me inwardly cringe, as if I’d betrayed someone, when in reality, I realized it was just me overthinking a relationship that simply didn’t exist.
I turned my head slightly to the side, looking down before briefly catching Ford’s eyes. His attention flicked from me to the group of young men who were laughing and having a good time, Cody and Blair in the middle of them all, then back to me. If I didn’t know any better, I could swear he was silently trying to tell me something, but I couldn’t fathom what it would be.
“Thirty thousand,” Cody countered, glaring at his friend before smirking.
“Looks like we have a healthy competition here. Keep it up, boys,” Steph encouraged. “It’s just more money for the cause.” All eyes had turned to the two stars, waiting to see who would win in the end.
“Thirty-five.” Blair tilted his head and smiled.
“Forty.” Cody stood taller and raised his brow. The two of them faced each other and squared off.
Steph covered the head of
the mic and leaned into me. “I should just tell them to whip ’em out so we can see who’s bigger and let that be the deciding factor.”
I choked on my swallow, her comment unexpected and hilarious.
“Forty-five.” Blair looked to be a tad uneasy, frowning at the sight of his friend refusing to back down. I wanted to know how far they’d take it, and apparently, so did Blair.
“Fifty thousand,” Cody said loud and with confidence, and we all knew he’d won as soon as Blair shook his head and slapped his friend on the back.
Several seconds of silence followed, everyone waiting to see if indeed Cody had won the auction.
“We have fifty thousand.” More silence. “Anyone else care to bid?” A few more breaths passed. “Okay, then. Fifty-thousand dollars for a date with Cara Dessoye goes to Cody Caverly. Congratulations, and you better be a gentleman,” she warned, shaking her finger at him.
An eruption of applause sliced through the air, but I didn’t focus on the chatter or the winner, for that matter. Instead, I turned to look at Ford and witnessed him mouth “Fuck” right before he turned away from me and pulled Owen to another corner of the room.
* * *
Ford
The moment I heard Cody bid on the date with Cara, I knew he’d end up being the winner. There was something about the guy, something I couldn’t put my finger on, that I didn’t trust. Then again, I didn’t trust any guy around her, and I tried to convince myself it was because her safety was my concern, but my gut told me it was something deeper.
I pulled Owen farther away from the crowd while still being able to keep an eye on the women. I swore if my heart didn’t stop beating so fast, the overworked organ would seize up. Then maybe I’d have an excuse to get the hell out of there.