by Aj Harmon
Erica nodded. “Yep. Pretty silly huh?”
The waitress arrived with the calamari and asked if they’d had a chance to look at the menu. With guilty expressions they looked at each other and smiled.
“How about we start with the Dungeness Crab cocktails?”
“That sounds wonderful,” Erica smiled.
“And then I’ll have the Surf and Turf with a baked potato. Erica?”
“The same,” she smiled. “With a garden salad and ranch dressing.”
“I’ll do the same,” William told the waitress. She nodded and moved on to her next table.
“I love calamari,” he said as he dipped a piece into the cocktail sauce and popped it into his mouth.
“I don’t think I’ve ever tried it,” Erica admitted. “I don’t really do exotic.”
William smiled such a gentle and sweet smile. “Trust me, you’ll love it.”
“Okay,” and she took a piece and copied him by dipping it into the sauce and then popping the whole piece into her mouth. I can’t change the past but I can…I will shape my destiny.
*****
The song ended and Greg placed his hand in the small of her back and guided Jill back to their table. There waited a plate of exquisitely decorated chocolate covered strawberries.
“I took the liberty of pre-ordering our dessert,” he grinned. “I know how much you love them.”
Jill giggled with pleasure. “Oh, yes I do. Thank you.” She picked one up by the green leafed end and took a big bite, the sweetness of the strawberry hitting her taste buds and making her sigh in notable satisfaction.
“Um, you’re gonna need to stop doing that,” Greg chuckled as she took another bite, her tongue licking the chocolate from her lips in pure ecstasy. “You’re kinda turning me on.”
Jill giggled again. “You have one,” she insisted as she picked up a strawberry from the silver platter. It was dipped in rich chocolate and decorated in white chocolate swirls. It was almost too pretty to eat. But he took a bite as she pressed it to his lips and then she brought the rest to her lips and finished it. “Maybe we could get the rest to go?”
Greg called the waiter over and asked him to box up the rest and to bring the check. “Sounds like a perfect plan,” he smiled.
With their bag of sweets in hand, they walked outside into the crisp spring evening. “Cold?” Greg asked.
“Not at all,” she replied.
They’d walked about half a block before a pedi-cab came by and Greg hailed him to stop. He helped Jill in and followed in behind her and then instructed the young man to take them back to the hotel the scenic way. With his arm around her, Greg pulled Jill into his side and smelled her hair then kissed her forehead. She relaxed into his arms and they silently enjoyed the ride back to the Holiday Inn.
18.
PERSISTING, ERICA CONTINUED TO ask William about his life in New York. She wanted to know about where he lived, the hospital, his job, what he did in his spare time. The mood was carefree and light and William felt that the weight pressing down on his shoulders had been lifted. The inflection in his voice was light hearted and animated. He told anecdotes from work, and attempted to explain the profound satisfaction he received from his work when a patient received their last round of chemo or last shot of radiation.
He confided in her the terrible sadness he’d felt at realizing he’d lost the chance to get to know his father before he died and the vow he’d made to rebuild a relationship with his brother.
“I was angry at him for a long time for the way he treated you. But I must let those feelings go. It doesn’t do either of us any good,” he said.
With a light chuckle, Erica agreed. “Me, too. But if I’m being honest,” she admitted, “I knew what I was getting into when I married him. I didn’t want to see it, but deep down I knew it would never work. But I went ahead because I didn’t see any better prospects. Isn’t that pathetic?”
“No.” he reached over and took her hand. “Sometimes I think we tell ourselves that we don’t deserve what we want. We tell ourselves we aren’t good enough, so we settle for a life that is less than. We hide away, afraid to get hurt if we take a risk.”
“What are you afraid of, William?”
“Me?” he asked in surprise. Erica nodded, silently encouraging him to continue. “I’m afraid of…of being bold.”
“What does that mean?”
Fortunately for him, the waitress appeared to clear their plates. She asked how their food had been to which they both replied it was delicious. When she asked if they’d like dessert, Erica grinned.
“Let’s live on the wild side, shall we?”
“Okay,” he laughed. “Tell you what. Bring us the three desserts that are your best sellers.”
“Three?” Erica was startled.
“You only live once,” he winked.
“Well, alright then,” the waitress replied with a grin. “Three it is!”
*****
The only light that was on was the bathroom light throwing a light glow throughout the rest of the room. Wrapped in her robe, Annie stood at the side of the bed and combed through her wet hair. Evan was sitting, propped up by four bed pillows against the headboard, reading on his tablet. Gracie lay against his leg sucking on her thumb, dressed in pink pajamas, her legs kicking every once in a while. Her dark hair contrasted against the white sheets on the bed and Annie was mesmerized by each tiny movement.
“She’s been fed, burped, and I even managed to change her diaper without getting pooped on this time,” Evan grinned as he put down his tablet on the night stand. “I had no idea that babies had that kind of aim.”
Annie laughed. “I think it was just perfect timing. Unlike little boys, we girls don’t have a way to aim.”
“I’m looking forward to going home tomorrow.”
“Me, too. Although I’m not looking forward to hauling all this stuff back to Oklahoma.”
Evan snorted as he laughed, startling Gracie. He quickly lifted her to his chest and held her close, rubbing her back and calming her. With a more controlled chuckle, he looked up at his wife and said, “I can guarantee you that you won’t be hauling any of this stuff. You will be charged with the most precious cargo, baby Gracie here, and I will be packing everything else.”
“True,” Annie grinned. She crawled onto the bed and snuggled up beside Evan, and into his side, her face resting on his shoulder inches from Gracie. “I could stay like this forever. This is perfect. Just the three of us.”
“Well we know that’s not gonna happen. Four of us in a few months.”
“Yes,” she whispered with a smile. “Four.”
They’d ordered room service, deciding to stay in, then Annie had taken a shower and had packed up one of the suitcases. They were returning home in the morning, going home to be a family. Evan had taken six weeks leave from work, covered under his benefit package, and Annie’s parents had planned a big party in three weeks for all the family to come and meet the newest addition. Life would never be the same and for that they were grateful.
The three of them lay in bed, cocooned in each other’s arms and hearts.
*****
Arm in arm, Greg and Jill walked through the lobby of the hotel, into the elevator and up to their room on the ninth floor. Once locked inside, he pulled her into his arms and crushed his lips against hers with an urgency that surprised her. He devoured her, only releasing her briefly to come up for air. She’d never seen or felt this intense need from him and she offered herself to him willingly.
Jill clung to him, her arms tightly wound around his neck, her body pressed to his. As his fire for her burned, it melted her heart. She felt the same…felt the powerful desire she had for him and cried out in anticipation of their physical joining.
“How I love you,” he breathed as he pressed his forehead to hers, panting heavily, trying to gain some control. “You are my world, Jill.” And he released her and dropped to his knee. “I have debated, argu
ed with myself over whether or not you’re ready…whether or not your feelings for me are as unbreakable as mine for you. I know they are. I feel it when you kiss me, when you touch me, when you look at me. So I’m going to risk it all here and beg.”
Jill felt her knees weaken. Her hand slowly moved to her mouth as her eyes filled with tears which she fought back.
“I think I knew the very first time I saw you that you were my future. Don’t ask me how, I just did. And the more time we spent together the more that feeling was confirmed. This last year has been wonderful…the best of my life. I’ve loved every minute we’ve spent together, but it has made me realize that I want more…so much more. I want it all! I want to see the world with you. I want to prove to you every day that my only goal in life is to make you smile. I want to fold the laundry together and do the dishes after a cozy night in. I want to make love to you every morning when I wake up…your face being the first thing I see. I want to grow old with you. I want you to know that I love you with all that I am. The money, the apartment, all of it means nothing if I don’t have you to share it with. And I know that we can live together and already, kind of, have all of that, but I want more. I need more. I want to exchange vows with you in front of our family and friends and in front of God. I want to be your husband and I want you to be my wife. This is sudden, I understand that you are in shock. I see it in your face. But Jill, will you marry me?”
*****
Three plates lay in front of them. New York Cheesecake with raspberry sauce, a brownie sundae with copious amounts of ice cream and chocolate drizzle on top, and a six-layer chocolate mousse cake that William was sure would cause blocked arteries all on its own.
“Well,” Erica sighed. “You’re the one who wanted three.”
He smiled. “Yep. Grab a fork. Let’s eat.”
“I’ll have to run an extra hour, or two, tomorrow,” she chuckled as she dug into the cheesecake. “Divine,” she sighed as she swallowed the first bite.
Tomorrow, he thought. Life goes back to normal tomorrow.
“You’re thinking something,” Erica noted. “I see it. What?”
“I go home tomorrow.”
“Oh.” There was a real disappointment in her voice. She heard it and so did William.
BE BOLD! Don’t let your life motto be ‘too afraid to try.’ “I have to be back at work. I have patients.”
“Yes, of course you do.”
“But…”
“Yes?”
“Maybe, I mean, just because I’ve gone back to New York doesn’t mean that we can’t, um, can’t still talk. There’s email and texting and maybe some time you could come and visit me and I can come back here when I take some vacation time.”
“Yes,” she smiled brightly. “We could do that…you could come here and I could go there.”
BE BOLD! He reminded himself. “Erica…”
“Yes?”
“I liked you in high school…a lot.”
“So you said,” Erica smiled, almost a little embarrassed but mixed with a smidgen of hope.
“I never married. I don’t think I ever got over you. Now, before you say anything,” he said as he held up his hands as Erica’s mouth opened to speak, “I need to say that I’m not expecting you to tell me anything in return. Nor am I saying that we try to rekindle a thirty year old teenage crush. But it would be nice to get to know you again…to be friends.”
Erica nodded as she tried to understand what he was saying. He appeared to struggle just getting those words out so she decided not to push it further…for now. The fact that he wanted to get to know her again buoyed her spirits and gave her something to look forward to. She would love to be his friend, and if that’s all it would ever be, she was okay with that, too. A friend is always a good thing to have.
With them both experiencing emotional relief, they turned their attention to the desserts waiting to be devoured. And devour them they did.
19.
IN JUST A COUPLE of seconds, a thousand and one thoughts raced through Jill’s mind. Greg knelt in front of her, her right hand in his, his gaze piercing her heart. He saw right through her…knew her innermost thoughts and secrets…and still loved her. He knew her insecurities and her bad habits and personality flaws…and loved her despite them. He knew her first marriage had failed miserably, as did his, yet he was willing to try again…with her…learning from their past mistakes and focusing on building a solid foundation on which to build their future. He’d never asked her to change for him and she knew in her soul he never would. While the money was a perk, it had never defined him as a man. Greg knew who he was – rich or poor – he was still the same man she loved.
If she looked back at the past year, she would know that truthfully, in her heart, she committed herself to him after their third date. They’d gone to Navy Pier and rode the Ferris wheel and taken a speed boat tour of the lake. They’d eaten at Bubba Gump’s and had each recited their favorite lines from the movie and happily discovered they were the same ones. When he’d taken her home and kissed her goodbye on her doorstep, never pushing for a physical relationship until she invited him in, she realized that she’d never met a man like Greg and was his from that day on.
Here she stood a year later, prepared to move in with him and now with a surprise proposal. Was there really any question in her mind? Could she ever imagine her life with him not in it? Not sharing her life with him, the good and the bad? Instinctively she knew that if she said no their relationship would continue at its status quo. He wouldn’t be angry or pout or in any way hold her refusal against her, and that’s what determined her answer.
“Yes. I love you, too, Greg and I will marry you.”
The breath he was holding exhaled in one long swoosh and he closed his eyes and smiled. “Those three seconds were the longest of my life,” he chuckled as he rose to his feet and once again pulled her into his embrace. “Just let me kiss you once and then…” But he didn’t finish his sentence as his lips pressed gently to hers, his tongue sweeping into her mouth and claiming her fully.
“Only once?” she whispered against his lips.
He smiled and retreated two steps to the chest of drawers behind him. Opening the top drawer, he grabbed the black velvet box and handed it to her.
“You have a ring?” she gasped.
“I came prepared,” he slyly admitted. “Open it.”
“You do it,” Jill whispered as her shaking hands gave the box back to him.
With a grin, Greg took the box and lifted the lid, revealing the exquisite diamond ring inside. “Do you like it?”
“It’s beautiful, stunning. It’s gorgeous,” she gushed.
Greg was instantly relieved with his choice. The sales lady had convinced him that any woman would love to wear the ring and he’d hoped and prayed she was right. The look on Jill’s face reassured him that she had steered him in the right direction. He pulled it from the box and took her left hand in his and slid it over her knuckle and down her finger. It was a hair too big, but Jill didn’t appear to care. She looked down at her hand and then up into his eyes. All he saw was love.
*****
“Shall we walk back to the hotel, or ride one of these bike cab things?” William asked as he escorted Erica from the restaurant into the cool dark night.
“Let’s walk. It’s not too cold and it looks like a full moon.”
“I don’t get to see the sky in Manhattan.” It was tough for William to admit there was something about his hometown that he missed. He’d spent the last twenty years convincing himself there was nothing about the west coast that he couldn’t do without. Yet, as he walked with Erica back to the hotel, he had to admit that there was something about the bay at night, the moon reflecting on the water, the city lights flickering, that triggered a sense of nostalgia.
“Yeah, but you have the city!” Erica enthused. “I would just love to walk the streets of New York in the spring! I imagine it is breathtaking.”
&nb
sp; William considered her statement. “I suppose it is. But its home so I take it for granted,” he chuckled. “You should come and see it. Everyone should visit New York in the spring.”
“You know I have some money in savings. I should use it to take a vacation.”
“I would like it if you came and visited. You’d always have a place to stay, you know.”
Erica smiled and then it happened…something unexpected and amazing. William was bold. He reached for her hand and held it in his as they walked the rest of the way to the Grand Hyatt in silence.
*****
Jill lay half hidden by the white sheet draped temptingly across her body, her left hand resting on her stomach, the diamond sparkling brilliantly in the light coming through the open balcony door. Greg exited the bathroom and stood at the foot of the bed gazing at her with renewed desire.
“Give me a few more minutes,” she giggled. “I’m still reeling.”
“Reeling?” he asked. “Interesting choice of words.”
“The champagne, the proposal, the mind blowing sex, it all has my head spinning.”
“In a good way, right?” he asked, weary of the answer she might give.
“Definitely in a good way,” she grinned. “Come cuddle.”
“Your wish is my command,” he winked as he slid in beside her and pulled her into his arms. “So, big wedding? Small wedding? Elope? Where should we go on our honeymoon?”
Jill laughed. “I can’t even begin to think about that now. I’m still trying to breathe normally!”
“Summer wedding? Winter? Next spring? This spring?” He was unrelenting.
“This spring?” Jill propped herself up onto her elbow and looked him square in the eye. “You’re joking, right?”
“You’ve said yes. I don’t want to give you the opportunity to change your mind.”
“I’m not changing my mind,” she reassured. “Besides, then I’d have to give the ring back,” she teased.
“Good! So seriously, give me a time frame, just so I know what we’re looking at. And how long do you want to wait before we have babies?” The second the words fell from his lips he wanted them back. And as soon as he saw her face he knew it had destroyed the mood. A nuclear bomb going off would have done less damage. “I’m sorry,” he begged. “That was stupid, and…”