Hardwired

by Meredith Wild

  Before I could finish him off, he hauled me to my feet. His eyes were wild and intense, as if he’d passed the limits of his control.

  “My turn,” he said, his voice so raspy and raw it almost sounded like a threat. He scooped me up into his arms and effortlessly tossed me onto the bed.

  He stripped me of my lace panties and set his hands on my knees, coaxing them apart. Embarrassed and emboldened at once, I felt my cheeks heat. I was exposed completely, but when he lowered to me, the sensation of his mouth between my legs overwhelmed everything.

  I sucked in a sharp breath, his name on my lips.

  He tongued my wet, quivering sex with the expert skill that he’d used on my mouth, flicking and taunting and sucking. Sweet Jesus, he had a gifted mouth.

  He moaned, vibrating my clit as he sucked me. My walls clenched deliciously and I clutched at the silken fabrics beneath us. The energy in my core climbed with an alarming speed.

  “You taste so good.”

  The feeling of his breath on the sensitive tissues followed by the determined strokes of his tongue over the tight bundle of nerves pushed me over the edge. My mind left me.

  “Oh God!” I came hard, letting the orgasm ripple through me.

  My breathing was ragged as I tried to regain my senses. Under heavy eyelids, I watched him undress fully before me. Despite my very recent orgasm, my desire for Blake had barely waned. I ached for him, to have him inside me, finishing what we’d begun.

  He leveled me with a look so intense and determined that I almost came again on the spot. His cock bobbed gently, long, broad, and hard as stone as he rolled on a condom.

  “You ready for me, baby?”

  I nodded quickly. Ready as I was ever going to be.

  “Thank God, because I’m not sure if I could stop now if I wanted to.”

  He climbed onto the bed over me, and I panted softly, scorchingly aware of his approach. The thick tight muscles of his thighs parted my legs around him. I hitched my leg high over his hip and arched, urging him into me eagerly.

  He grasped me by the hip and stilled my effort. We were barely connected, the head of his penis notched at my entrance.

  “Blake,” I said, my voice breathy and desperate.

  He bent to find my mouth, and our tastes mingled with the scent of my arousal. The act seemed too intimate, too raw under the circumstances, but heightened my already blinding need for him.

  I struggled against his grasp, wild to have all of him. He loosened his hold and pushed inside. I uttered a small cry into his mouth, shocked at how completely he filled me. I relished the deliciousness of the sensation. Nothing felt more right than the achingly slow drive of his body into mine. My body stretched to accommodate him, and the bite of his entry soon gave way to a deeper hunger.

  “Perfect,” he said, thrusting again.

  I closed my eyes and held him tighter to me, letting that single world rule the moment. He moved with deliberate and measured strokes, filling me and holding back with painstaking pauses. Rotating satisfaction with an impossible longing. Each movement bringing me closer to the edge.

  The promise of release beckoned, but he kept me wanting more while he took my mouth in slow, deep kisses. The rhythm was driving me crazy with the need to orgasm.

  “Blake, please.” My voice cracked.

  He slowed his pace until I thought I would die of frustration. “Trust me,” he whispered into my ear.

  Then without warning, he grabbed my ass and drove hard into me. By the second punishing thrust I found my voice, though I barely recognized it when I screamed. Relentlessly he claimed new depths of my body, giving me everything I had damn near begged him for. And I took it all.

  “God… fuck… Blake!” A storm raged inside of me, my body responding uncontrollably to his. I gripped his hair by the root and clung to him.

  “That’s it, baby. Come hard for me,” he rasped.

  My climax pulsed through me. I clenched around him, my whole body shuddering as he became impossibly bigger, pounding out his own release in time with mine.

  He groaned, stilling inside me, pulsing deeply.

  Eyes closed, he collapsed onto his elbows above me. Gradually our breathing slowed, our bodies cooled, and we began to return to ourselves. He brushed soft kisses over my cheek and neck while my arms and legs tangled around him.

  I sighed. “I didn’t know…”

  He smiled and kissed me. “Know what?”

  “That… it could be like that.”

  His smile faded and his lips parted slightly as he ran his thumb over the curve of my cheekbone. My chest ached at his closeness and the wonder I thought I saw in his half-lidded eyes.

  He gave me a chaste kiss and pulled away.

  “I’m going to wash up. I’ll be right back. Unless you want to join me.”

  I shook my head slightly. “I’m not sure if my legs work right now.”

  He laughed a little as he stood. “I did warn you.”

  As he disappeared into the en suite bathroom, I got a little thrill worshiping the back of him. His ass was perfectly sculpted like every other delicious inch of him. Everything about Blake had become too much, an onslaught to my senses, a train barreling through my better judgment.

  And I was loving every minute of it.

  ***

  I woke up abruptly, disoriented until I recognized the hand-painted gold butterflies on the ceiling. Blake lay on his stomach next to me, snoring quietly into the pillow. His body was soft and relaxed, a different picture from the muscle-bound animal who had quite recently blown my mind. I must have dozed off while he showered. He hadn’t bothered to wake me and send me on my way.

  Still, I couldn’t be here when he woke up. I was completely blissed out, but the idea of facing the walk of shame in the daylight hours sobered me into action.

  Ambient light filled the room but the desert sky before us was pitch black, save the frenetic city lights, with no hint of the impending dawn. I slid quietly out of the bed and dressed, though despite my best efforts, I could not find my panties anywhere. I put on my heels and stopped at the writing desk. I scribbled a note, setting the $10,000 chip on top of it.

  What happens in Vegas…

  x, E

  I took in the skyline a minute longer, then left Blake’s suite without a sound.

  Moments later I crept into our hotel room with impressive stealth, but Alli was propped up on a pillow watching TV when I entered.

  “Hey, what are you doing up?” It was nearly two a.m.

  “What are you doing up?” She pursed her lips.

  “Uh, nothing.”

  “You little slut. Tell me everything.” She muted the TV and sat up cross-legged on the edge of the bed.

  “Not much to tell.” I shrugged and slipped out of my dress in favor of a robe.

  “Don’t even start with me, Erica. Dish, now.” She pointed her manicured little finger at me.

  I sighed and sat on the edge of the bed facing her. This morning I had berated her for the same thing. What a hypocrite.

  “I’ll just say, if Heath is anything like his brother, um, in bed”—I stumbled over the words—“I forgive you, all right?”

  “Shut up! Was it amazing?”

  “There are no words. Now I just have to figure out how to stay the hell away from him.”

  “Why? What do you mean?” A frown marred her brow at the mere suggestion.

  “We had our moment, but I’m really hoping this is once and done for him, because…” I let my face fall into my hands, which still smelled like him. I breathed in his scent and let the memory of our night settle over me.

  “Erica, what?”

  I sat up abruptly, as if I’d been caught doing something I wasn’t supposed to.

  “You were telling me why you want this to stay a one-night-stand,” she reminded me.

  “I don’t know!” I twisted my fingers in my lap. “I just know I could get addicted to that. To him. I’m here for work and basically he�
�s all I can think about already.”

  I gestured to the ceiling, his general direction. I shook off the memories that felt too new, knowing Blake was still perfectly naked, slumbering a few floors away.

  “I don’t know. I’m a mess. I need to sleep.”

  Alli nodded, but I caught a coy smile before she switched off the TV and turned over under her duvet.

  Grateful for the reprieve, I retreated to the bathroom to shower. The intoxication of being with Blake tapered as the water thrummed my already weak muscles, draining the last of my waning energy. Already he meant too much.

  CHAPTER SIX

  A few days had gone by since Alli and I returned from Vegas. I wanted to believe that life would return to normal, but nothing was normal about my life right now. I was on the verge of not having a place to live, starting down a road of running my business full time, and now I couldn’t get Blake out of my head.

  For all my wishing our one night together stayed that way, the little voice in my head wanted him to reach out to me somehow. I silently berated myself for foolishly longing for something—someone—I’d never have. Just like our rather public embrace at the conference, I was a blip. A passing interest for a cocky billionaire who had no reason to linger too long on anyone.

  I shuffled through my mail, reminding myself that I’d gotten exactly what I’d asked for. When I stepped out of the campus center, I heard my name. A girl with cropped blond hair ascended the steps to meet me. She looked like a teen model. Tan, tall, and impeccably dressed in a tank top and a linen skirt.

  “Liz,” I said. “How are you?”

  She smiled broadly. “Great. I can’t believe we’re finally done!”

  “I know, time flies.” I shook my head in shared disbelief.

  “Do you want to grab a coffee? I’d love to catch up.”

  Her warm brown eyes seemed genuine, but I had always avoided these moments. Our friendship had fizzled when I moved across campus after our freshman year together, and we had never really addressed it. I hesitated. School was over, no homework, no plans. I had no excuses.

  I shrugged. “Sure.”

  We walked a short distance to the closest cafe where some moody hipsters made us delicious overpriced cappuccinos. We sat at a table for two, the chaos of the cafe filling the silence between us. I’d seen Liz around campus here and again, but we hadn’t really talked in years. We barely knew each other anymore.

  “Do you have any plans for the summer?” I asked.

  “I’m going to Barcelona with my parents for a few weeks, and then I start work in July.”

  “Where are you working?”

  “At an investment firm here in the city, crunching numbers or whatever.” She blew steam off her cup. “What about you?”

  “I actually started a fashion social network last summer and it’s been going pretty well, so I’m going to be running that for a while. We’ll see where it goes.”

  “That’s amazing. I would have never expected that.”

  I raised my eyebrows. What would you expect, I wondered, picking at the flaky crust of my chocolate croissant.

  “How are Lauren and everyone else at the house?” I asked, referring to the girls who’d shared a floor with us.

  “Really good.” She paused before continuing, “We’ve missed you though.”

  I took a long sip of my cappuccino, sensing where the conversation was heading. College was over, and a new chapter was beginning. Maybe it was finally time to clear the air, especially if I might be running into her in the city now. Boston was still small enough for chance meetings.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t give you a heads up about moving out at the end of the year. I was going through a lot at the time.” That was an understatement, but I didn’t really want to get into it with her right now. The last thing I needed was to dredge up painful memories.

  “I realize that. I just thought we were friends, you know?”

  “We were,” I said. “We still can be. I just needed a fresh start after everything that happened.”

  She nodded and gave me a weak smile.

  I sighed, resigned to the fact that I wouldn’t be getting around this topic no matter how hard I dodged it. “Nothing was the same after that night. You and everyone else were the same, but I wasn’t. I couldn’t go out partying with all of you like nothing happened.”

  I took a breath, trying to push the painful memories back down. I pushed my plate away, a twinge of nausea taking root in my gut.

  “It had nothing to do with our friendship, or you. I just couldn’t stand that look on everyone’s faces. Plus, what if I ran into him again, you know? I don’t know what I would have done.”

  Dealing with what happened to me had been difficult enough. At the time, the thought of reliving it in any way had terrified me. The only thing that kept me from constantly looking over my shoulder today was the fact that I’d buried the memories so deep I scarcely believed the man who’d hurt me existed anymore.

  When I looked up at her, the pity in her eyes made me even more sick to my stomach. I eyed my purse and searched for a believable excuse to leave.

  “I wanted to talk with you about it, but you never really gave me a chance,” she said.

  “Believe it or not, I don’t really like talking about it.” I pressed my lips into a firm line. I never wanted to talk about it—or think about it—ever again. But that wasn’t Liz’s fault. None of this really was.

  Her eyes were bright and innocent, reminding me of the many nights we’d spent foraging her parents’ gift boxes of junk food, sharing stories and dreams in our freshman naïveté.

  I sat back in my chair, drawing in a deep breath. “I needed to work things out on my own, and for whatever reason, I couldn’t do that at the house.”

  She nodded. “I understand.”

  She didn’t, but I gave her credit for trying, even though she was dragging me through memories I’d long buried.

  “Maybe we can get together when I get back from Spain and catch up a bit,” she said. “We don’t have to talk about that stuff, obviously. I know it’s upsetting for you.”

  “Sure.” I forced a smile. I couldn’t change the past, but maybe we could salvage some of what was lost.

  “Let’s stay in touch.”

  We talked about professors and housing in the city while Liz finished her muffin. Afterwards we exchanged numbers and said our goodbyes. As I turned toward the campus again, my phone dinged with a text. It was Alli.

  Need to talk. I have news.

  My stomach sank. I called her as I walked.

  “What’s up?”

  “I have news.”

  “So you said. What is it?”

  She paused a moment. “I got the job.”

  “Great,” I blurted, disappointment clear in my tone of voice. I couldn’t help it. This was terrible news.

  “Erica?”

  “What do you want me to say?”

  I stepped out of the way of foot traffic as people passed me on the street. Seeing Liz had put me on edge, and now I was losing Alli—my best friend, roommate, and business partner. I refused to count this as a high point in my day.

  “Congratulations, Alli. I know you wanted this. Unfortunately I didn’t.”

  Alli was silent on the phone for a few seconds. “We talked about this, and now you seem surprised.”

  She was right, but it didn’t offset the sting. Things were in motion now, just shy of Max’s potential decision to fund us.

  “When do you leave?”

  “In a few days. I can crash with a friend in the city until I get a place.”

  My phone started buzzing with another call. I didn’t recognize the number but needed an excuse to get out of this conversation before I said something I didn’t mean. “Someone’s calling me, Alli. I gotta go.”

  She sighed. “Okay, bye.”

  I registered a pang of guilt as I switched over to the other line.

  “Hello?

  “Erica,
it’s Blake.”

  I cursed under my breath. Of all the times I’d wanted him to call. “This isn’t a great time.”

  “Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine.” I sounded anything but fine.

  “Where are you? I’m in the neighborhood.”

  I glanced around for the nearest recognizable landmark. “Near Campbell Square.”

  “I’ll pick you up in five minutes.” He ended the call before I could argue.

  I sat on a park bench, idly checking email on my phone to distract me from the bomb Alli had dropped on me. In one, Sid reported a decent influx of new users since the conference, which was welcome news since I had wondered if the entire effort had amounted to an expensive 3,000-mile booty call for Blake. My thoughts drifted back to Alli and Liz and how utterly alone I had become in the past hour. My eyes burned with emotion, and I wiped away a tear that fell.

  A car horn broke the moment. Blake sat in the driver’s seat of a sleek black sports car waiting at the curb. I approached and was momentarily confused by the lack of door handles until one glided out of its hidden pocket in the passenger door. I got in, instantly mesmerized by the enormous LCD screen situated between the driver and passenger seats.

  “What the hell is this?” I asked, instantly overwhelmed by all the gadgets and gizmos.

  “It’s a Tesla.”

  I stared out to the road ahead, waiting for the car to move.

  “Hey,” he said softly, brushing his thumb against my cheek.

  He looked fresh and cute, but his smile soon faded. My throat tightened as if I could cry again. I swallowed against the sensation, my body stiffening in an act of self-defense.

  “I’m fine, seriously.” I turned my face and wiped away any errant mascara that might clue him in to my recent meltdown. I didn’t know if I could bear being any more vulnerable to this man than I already was and still maintain a shred of professional integrity. “What do you want?”

  “I wanted to see you. Are you hungry?”

  “Sure.” I wasn’t, but I wanted to be anywhere but here. I let Blake take us away in what I now recalled was an extremely expensive high-tech car whose stock had just skyrocketed.