There All Along

by Lauren Dane

  As a slap, it was a good one. The kind only someone who knows you very well can deliver. “I’m sorry, am I interrupting your plan to keep him here, where he doesn’t want to be so you can snuff out any dreams he might have that are beyond your ken?”

  “Now who’s acting beneath herself?”

  “Maybe the sister who just called the other a whore? As for this situation with Tobin? It needs to be said, Constance. He’s your boy. I respect that. I’m not putting ideas in his head. Because he’s a smart young man. Because he has his own ideas. His own vision of his future. And because you can’t punish him for wanting to know what’s out there. Do you think you can just tell him no, put him behind a plow and he’ll forget?”

  “That plow puts food on your table.”

  “Sure it does. Just like this mercantile puts food on yours. Don’t play the martyr game with me. He came to me to share his dreams. Not because he expected me to supply him with more, but because he knew I’d listen and not judge. I’m not his mother. I’ve never tried to be. I’m his aunt and his friend and I’m glad he has dreams. No matter what they might be. If he wanted to stay here to follow in his father’s footsteps I’d be glad of those dreams too. It’s not the what of the dreams, it’s the fact that he has them. It’s beautiful that even out here on the edge he has them. He’s perfectly capable of his finding own wants and desires. He doesn’t need me to give them to him.”

  “You’re giving him a place to stay so he can avoid his parents.”

  “No. I’m letting him stay here until his father cools down and realizes kicking Tobin out of his home because he is afraid for his son’s future is an overreaction and a mistake.”

  “That’s not for you to decide.”

  “You don’t get to tell me how to feel or react to anything. I love you and I respect your family. But Tobin is an adult now. He came to me and asked for my help and I’m giving it to him. I urged him to try to patch things up with you. But I won’t urge him to stifle his wants for other people.”

  “Why not? It’s dangerous out there!” Constance burst from her seat and began to pace, wringing her hands. “Can’t you just tell him that? To wait a few years?”

  “The world is dangerous. Shelter City is safer than Silver Cliffs. He’d learn to protect himself even better there. He could very well come back here, you know. He could be a garrison officer if he doesn’t want to be a lawman. But if you push him away, what are his reasons to come back?”

  “My husband doesn’t want me to speak to you any more. He feels you’re a bad influence.”

  That hurt deeply. She licked her lips.

  “And what do you think?”

  “I think your being unmarried at your age and status is dangerous. It leads the men in town to think things about you that aren’t true. But that you won’t do your duty for the good of everyone around you makes you, as he says, dangerous. Look at what you’ve done to my son.”

  “I already got married for the good of everyone around me. It got me years of beatings. Of rapes and abuse. It got me a drunk more than twice my age. That was for your good? Because if that’s true, I don’t want you in my life either. If you’d wish me back into that hell so your husband or the other men in Silver Cliffs won’t want to fuck the widow, you don’t deserve me.”

  Constance, probably for the first time in her whole life, seemed speechless. She stood, her mouth wide until she closed it with a snap.

  “My husband doesn’t want that. He’s a good man. And I didn’t know about the beatings. Or any of it.”

  “Lying is a sin, Constance. Everyone in this town knew. Just like everyone knows Loyal Alsbaugh is in my bed. Like everyone knows Shawna Parsons is sweet on Susan Anderson but will marry Susan’s brother, Matian, instead. She’ll bear his children and never act out on her feelings because everyone knows she’s wrong for having wants. Right? Everyone in this town knows Floyd Rodders sneaks in Cesna’s back door and has at her every time her husband goes off on a hunting trip. Everyone in town knows all sorts of things. I’m done living my life for the comfort of everyone else. Now you need to leave. You’ve said your piece. I’ve said mine. Don’t push your son away. Let him have his dreams. Let him fail if that’s what he needs to do. Have joy at the idea that he may find he loves being a lawman. But let the boy have his own heart. Don’t stifle him until that flame he carries inside burns out and he’s nothing but a piece of meat with legs shuffling around this town because everyone wants him to.”

  She went to her door and opened it.

  Constance licked her lips, but said nothing else before leaving. Verity closed the door in her sister’s wake and hoped it wouldn’t be the last thing they ever said to one another.

  But it didn’t matter more than not being silent. She was done living her life for what everyone else thought was best for them. She’d suffered through a marriage far more like a prison sentence. She did her time and now she had moved past it. Oh yes, she knew some of the people in town felt that an unmarried woman in her circumstances was too big a temptation for the married men. As if it was a woman’s fault a man couldn’t honor his promises to his family.

  She did have freedom. More than most. Certainly more than any other unmarried woman in Silver Cliffs. Since her father was dead and she was widowed, she didn’t need a male to tell her what to do. Constance’s husband had tried. He was a good man, she knew. Only trying to do his best in the world he knew.

  But that didn’t mean she would show her belly.

  Not to anyone.

  Never again.

  • • •

  Loyal came back to her place exhausted, but glad things seemed to have calmed down at last. He noted the light on in the mercantile and went to check, wondering if an emergency blip had come in.

  Instead he found Tobin sitting on a cot in the corner, reading.

  “I apologize, I thought Verity was down here. Is everything all right?”

  Tobin sighed. “Not really. Can I talk to you?”

  Loyal moved into the room fully, sliding into a chair near the blip equipment. “Sure.”

  “You know I want to attend lawman training. I sent my application in a while back.”

  Indigo had told him about that. Loyal had approved. They needed young people with the kind of honor and courage Tobin had shown.

  Loyal nodded. “He and I talked about that. I may be able to get the fee waived. Each of us, the commanders, can recommend one student per class to attend on scholarship. You’d have to come to Shelter City, pass rigorous physical and mental tests. But if you do, I’m happy to recommend you for that slot.”

  Tobin’s face lit. “You’d do that? Is it because of Verity?”

  Loyal snorted. “Boy, you’ll find, one of these days, that women can influence your behavior in many ways. But I’ve watched you grow up over the years I’ve come here. You’re resourceful. Over this time with the brigands outside the gates you’ve been brave and clever. And you’re from out here, from the garrisons. There are plenty of boys and girls from the inner core who attend training. But I think it’s important all of the Highway is represented in the lawmen corps.”

  “My mother said some hateful things to my aunt earlier.”

  “About?”

  “About my plans. Saying Verity put the idea into my head. She didn’t. She just listens. She’s a good listener. And she said she’d give me the credits. To attend the training I mean. She’s letting me stay here. What are your intentions with her?”

  “I think that’s between me and your aunt. Did your mother bring that into the argument?”

  Tobin nodded. “She’s headstrong. They say that about her like it’s a bad thing. But she’s got backbone, my aunt.”

  Loyal pushed himself to stand. “That she does. I’ll speak to her.”

  Tobin swallowed. “Thank you. For the recommendation I mean. And the advice. S
he cares about you. A lot. Don’t . . . don’t ruin it.”

  He headed around the back of the building and up the stairs to her place. To Verity’s small home. She was in her front room, looking out the windows. Smoking a cigarette.

  He’d never seen her smoke before.

  “How are things?” She asked without turning around.

  “Better out there than in here I wager.” He moved to her, his front to her back. He took the cigarette from her fingers, drew the smoke into his lungs and gave it back. “Didn’t know you smoked.”

  “I don’t. Mostly.”

  “I hear you had a set to with your sister. That why you’re smoking?”

  “I want to come with you when you leave.”

  He paused. “That’s what you and your sister argued about?”

  “No. Not in so many words.”

  “Why did you argue then?”

  She turned, leaning against the wall, looking him over slowly. Heat banked in his belly at this Verity. Bolder than usual.

  “We argued because Tobin wants to be a lawman. She accused me of trying to steal him from her. Accused me of not getting married and popping out babies for Jackson because I was too busy whoring it up and being a general bad influence on all the good men of Silver Cliffs. I want to come with you when you leave.”

  “Because your sister is a fluffy-headed idiot?”

  “Because I’m in love with you. Because I want to be with you. Because I want to see the world outside Silver Cliffs and I want to do so with you.”

  “You can’t just toss out that you love me because you had a fight with your sister.”

  She rolled her eyes, her movements dangerous as she stalked past him and into her kitchen. “I’m quite exhausted with people pretending they can tell me what I think or what my motivations are.”

  “That what you think I’m doing?”

  Perceptive eyes looked him over again, dangerously narrowed. His foolish, foolish cock liked it. Liked the air of danger flowing from her, tautening their interaction. He wanted to fuck her so badly his hands shook a little as he fisted them to keep from reaching for her.

  “I think I told you several things. First that I wanted to go with you when you left. I’ve been quite clear since you first came to Silver Cliffs that I have wanted to see the Highway and everything beyond the walls. We talked about it before, though you avoided it at the time. I also told you I loved you. And if you didn’t know that, you’re a fool.”

  “Why are you telling me now?”

  “You’ll be leaving soon. Right? The brigands are gone or you wouldn’t be back here. The threat level would still be on lockdown and it’s not. Your job is out there. You’ve been here a week already.”

  He leaned close, taking her cigarette again and handing it back. One of her eyebrows rose slowly.

  “I can’t just take someone with me in my escort vehicle. That’s not how it works.”

  “That’s what you choose to say right now? Do you think I’ll wait around for you to flit around from garrison to garrison? Being satisfied with the small bit of you I get?”

  “If I said the first thing that came to my mind you’d kick me in the cock.”

  “And what’s that then? I’ll give you amnesty. For now.”

  “That you’re dangerous and sexy and you make me want to bend you over this chair, flip your skirt up and shove my cock deep inside your cunt.”

  “Hm.”

  He satisfied himself with imagining what she’d feel like when he did get her drawers down and his cock into her. “As for the rest.” He scratched his beard. “I may be leaving Silver Cliffs to run my transports, but I’m not leaving you. There are no others I’m flitting to. It’s you. I’ll be back. For you. Always.”

  “Which means what?”

  He couldn’t help his grin and he took a step closer. She gave him a raised brow but didn’t move back.

  “It means I love you too. Scary woman.” He closed the last bit of distance, sliding an arm around her waist. “I’m sorry you had a fight with your sister. I’m sorry she was hurtful. I spoke with Tobin. I said I’d recommend him to the program for a scholarship spot. I can do one student per annum. He deserves the chance.”

  Her anger lifted and she stubbed out the cigarette, throwing her arms around him. “You did? You will?”

  “Yes and yes. It’ll be up to him to pass or fail once he gets in, but otherwise, I’m happy to help.”

  He flicked open the bodice of her dress, drawing a fingertip back and forth over the nipple he exposed.

  “You still thinking about kicking me in the cock? Because I’m going to need it in a breath or two.”

  Her annoyance melted . . . a bit . . . replaced by a smirk. “That so?”

  He leaned in, licking up the line of her throat, biting down when he got to a part he liked best.

  Her spine relaxed as she gave over to him. Satisfaction roared through his system. His. Verity Coleman was his woman and he meant to have her. Again and again.

  “You make me want to rut. No one before you has done that to my control.”

  Her fingers dug into his muscles as she held on. Held on as he licked over her collarbone. She made a sound, a near whimper as he pinched her nipples. Not too hard, but nearly. She arched into him and he let go long enough to back up, spin her.

  “Ass out. You’d best hold on to the table. Good thing there’s nothing on it.”

  He bent to pull her skirts up, flipping them to expose her legs. He pulled the drawers down quickly, one handed, as he unbelted his weapons holster and then unbuttoned his trousers, freeing his cock.

  “You make me so hard, Verity.” He teased her for a moment, his weight against her to keep her in place as he did. Gripping his cock at the root, he teased over her, through slick folds.

  So wet and hot. No matter if she’d been angry at him moments before or not. She wanted him as much as he wanted her. A tussle was all right now and again. Especially because his woman was sexy when she was fired up. But he didn’t like that she was upset. Didn’t like that her sister had said those hurtful things. Didn’t like that she’d doubted him for even a moment.

  Or that he may have given her a reason to doubt.

  “In,” she whispered, pressing herself back against him as he teased the fat, blunt head of his cock against that sweet-hot entrance to her pussy.

  “Like this?” He pressed in an inch or so, but pulled back.

  She groaned and then snarled when he moved away.

  He grinned, glad she couldn’t see it and get back on her kick Loyal in the cock line of thought.

  He wrapped the rope of her braid around his fist, guiding her head to the side, kissing her hard and fast as he thrust into her in one hard movement.

  Her gasp of delight was so sweet as he sucked it down, licking over her lips, biting and kissing.

  He fucked her as he’d wanted to all day. Deep and hard. Each sound she made, a soft squeal, a guttural moan, he made her feel. He brought from her.

  Standing straight, he looked down and watched himself disappear into her body over and over. Loving the carnal way she left him slick and dark. Loving that he was the only man who had this view. That she was his and he hers.

  He wasn’t ready to come yet though so he changed her angle with his free hand. Grabbing her hip and moving her, canting her hips, staying deep.

  She swayed a little though, circling him deep inside. It was his turn to gasp. His turn to nearly lose his mind and groan at how good it was.

  That space between him and climax shrank to a razor’s edge.

  Not ready yet. Not ready to be done.

  He pulled out, swallowing her sob of disappointment. He grabbed her, pulling her to the floor with him, laying over her body, kissing her hard, kissing her soft, trailing his lips down her throat.

&nbs
p; He loved the way she sighed, utterly satisfied, when he took a long lick of her pussy. Loved the way she slid her fingers through his hair and tugged him closer.

  “Get what you want, darlin’,” he murmured against her clit.

  “Give it to me.”

  Smiling, he did.

  He nibbled, sucked and licked until she writhed beneath him. Until she sucked in a breath and blew out his name on a moan, coming on his lips in a hot rush.

  While she was still gasping for breath he got to his knees and pulled her up, turning her body away from his as he lifted her to balance over his lap, arms braced on the floor.

  So slick and hot, he slipped back in on a sigh before he bounced her a few times, finding a rhythm he wanted. One she responded to, tightening around him.

  Instead of moving himself, he moved her. Bouncing her back against him over and over, drawing close to orgasm slowly but surely. Committing every sensation of her body around his, the way she sounded, her scent, to his memory. He’d be back, as he said. Eagerly. But while he was gone he wanted to call this moment up, remember what waited for him in Silver Cliffs.

  When he let himself fall into her, again, that act of homecoming was poignant. Life altering. Beautiful. It grabbed him with sharp claws and didn’t let go. Nor did he struggle to be free.

  He helped her to stand and noted her smile before he bent to kiss her again.

  “I’m hungry. And a little dirty now. What say you let me scrub your back and then I’ll make a meal for a change?”

  One of her brows slid up. “If you think I’m giving up on the idea of leaving with you because you pleasure me so well, you’re a fool,” she called on her way to the bathroom. “You can still scrub my back and make supper though.”

  He sighed, but followed her anyway.

  13

  She’d reached her limit.

  Interesting.