A Fine Bromance

by Christopher Hawthorne Moss

  “Just sit on him,” Robby screamed.

  Andy kept punching Smartass over and over until Robby grabbed his arms and made him stop. He could hear Andy weeping with anger.

  Smartass lay on the ground with his lip and nose bleeding. “You freak,” he swore at Andy.

  Claire had taken off after the others and was dragging Sophie back by the arm of her jacket.

  Robby was on his knees, his arms around Andy from the back. He was trying to calm him. Andy finally subsided when Robby heard running feet and looked in that direction. He couldn’t tell who it was at first, but he heard what sounded like police radios. Sure enough, one and then another cop ran up. One grabbed Andy off Smartass and started to handcuff him. “No, wait, he’s not the bad guy,” Robby shouted.

  The cop seemed to notice then that the girl he was grappling with was naked. He looked at Robby and asked, “He?”

  “Give me my pants,” Andy demanded.

  Robby riffled around in the confusion of clothing Smartass had dropped and found a pair of slacks. He handed them to Andy, who the cop had let go, and put the pants on with no underwear.

  Andy demanded, “My shirt! I’m cold.”

  The cop had Smartass on his feet and handcuffed. The other cop had ahold of Sophie and Claire. Claire was screaming and swearing at him.

  “That’s my sister. She’s okay,” Robby said.

  “Which one?” the cop asked.

  “The one who’s swearing,” said Andy.

  The cop let go of Claire and Sophie but glared at them. “Don’t move until we get this all sorted out,” he warned the two girls.

  They heard running feet again. This time it was Mr. Kahn. He ran to Andy crying, “Andy! What did they do to you?” Andy had his shirt and pants on by now.

  “They kidnapped him, stripped him, and tied him to the goalpost,” Robby informed Mr. Kahn and the cops. The police officer who had handcuffed Smartass took out a notebook and started asking questions.

  Looking at Smartass, the cop said, “What happened?”

  After identifying himself to the officer as Bradley Dunbar, Smartass said, “I have no idea what they’re talking about. I was just walking by the high school when these lunatics ran up and attacked me.”

  The cop raised his head from his notebook and asked, “Then why was this one naked?”

  Bradley shrugged. “He, um, she was making out with her boyfriend there.”

  The cop looked at Robby, clearly confused.

  Claire stomped her foot. “That’s my brother, Robby, and he was not making out with anyone. We got here and found Andy tied to the goalpost. Smartass there was responsible. Him and his friends. One of them had my cell phone, and that’s how we found them. You asshole!” she screamed and attacked the handcuffed Bradley.

  “Whoa, whoa,” said the cop who stood nearest them, grabbing her by the shoulders and pulling her off Bradley.

  Mr. Kahn was holding Andy but looked at Bradley. “How could you do such a thing? What kind of a person are you?”

  The boy just made inarticulate noises of denial.

  Mr. Kahn started to guide Andy away from the scene. “Hey, wait a minute. We saw this kid attacking this guy. We have to arrest him,” the cop said.

  Mr. Kahn looked confused. “But he was the one who was kidnapped. And he needs medical attention. They may have raped him.”

  “We’ll take him to the hospital in custody,” the other officer said.

  Mr. Kahn looked flustered. Then he said firmly, “I’ll drive him to the hospital, and you can escort us.”

  “Oh, Dad,” Andy protested. “I’m fine. I’m just really pissed off.”

  Everyone was startled when Mr. Kahn snapped, “Shut up, Andy. Do as you’re told.”

  Andy was speechless.

  The lead cop broke in. “I have to insist, sir. She’s a victim of a crime and we have to take her to the emergency room.”

  Mr. Kahn snapped, “Him!” making the cops look confused and Andy smile. “All right, then. Andy, I’ll call your mother too.” Taking out his cell phone, Mr. Kahn called home to talk to Ruth.

  Robby and Claire both put their hands on Andy’s shoulders. “It’ll be all right. We’ll meet you at the hospital. Evergreen?”

  At the officer’s nod, Robby gave Andy a peck on the cheek. Then he and Claire turned to where they had left the car.

  TWO HOURS later Robby and Claire found themselves in the waiting room of Emergency Services at Evergreen again. Their mother had arrived only minutes before. When they thanked her for calling the police, she said “Sure” weakly and walked off to get a cup of coffee from a vending machine.

  “Really worried, wasn’t she?” Claire exclaimed to her brother. “And where is Aunt Ivy?”

  All Robby could do was shrug.

  Mr. and Mrs. Kahn and Gabe were all in an examination room with Andy. After a short time, one of the cops came out and talked to the Czerwinskis. Robby and Claire between them described the events of the evening. The officer wrote it all down.

  “What’s going to happen?” Robby asked.

  The officer looked up from his notebook. “To her or to the boy who did this?”

  Robby said irritably, “Him.” He realized that by “him,” the officer would think he meant Bradley and explained, “To the boy in the emergency room.”

  “Oh, you mean the girl, I mean the transgender boy?” The cop was older and seemed to be still taking it all in. “I can’t tell you. Privacy rules and all. But we’re not charging her, um, him, and I don’t think he will press charges.”

  Robby almost shouted. “The boy who did this! What about arresting him?”

  The police officer said, “Calm down. We have him and the girl in custody. We’re looking for the other two boys and the other girl. When we find them all, we’ll decide what to charge them with, if anything.”

  “If anything?” Claire screeched.

  At a sound from the emergency room door, they all looked up to see Mr. and Mrs. Kahn and Andy coming out. Robby and Claire called “Andy” and jumped up and dashed to him.

  “Don’t make a fuss,” Andy said in a low tone, while his parents checked him out at the reception desk. “You are such a drama queen.”

  Ignoring Andy’s comment, Robby asked him, “But why are you out here?”

  Andy gestured to some seats by Gabe, and they all went to sit. “I’m perfectly all right. Just shaken up and some cuts and bruises. I would rather just go home.”

  Robby shook his head. “But the trauma!”

  Andy rolled his eyes. “I just want to go home.” After a short pause, he said, “I wonder what happened at the Quiz Kid tournament?”

  THE NEXT morning Robby called Andy with what he had learned about the tournament. “It’s kind of funny, really. We had alternates, so when we didn’t show up, they just put two in our places. But then they found out that Walla Walla Full Gospel High had had a wild party the night before at one of the area motels and gotten busted. They were disqualified from the Quiz Kid completion. So Highlands View won.”

  “No,” Andy said. “You aren’t serious.”

  “I certainly am. But how are you this morning?”

  Andy said, “I’m all right. I’m just waiting to hear what will happen to the kids who attacked me.”

  “They wouldn’t tell us anything about that. Will you be at school tomorrow?” Robby asked.

  “I think I need a week off.” It was the first time Andy had shown any indication that the experience of the past evening was anything more than a walk in the park.

  Andy continued, “I gotta get over all the humiliating things they had to check. Like… the pelvic exam.”

  Robby didn’t understand at first, but then it hit him. “Were you raped?” he asked in horror.

  “No,” Andy replied with a note of How stupid are you? in his voice. “And they could tell that right away.”

  Robby said, “I don’t understand…,” but then he realized he should drop it. “Never mind
,” he said, embarrassed.

  “Good. Can I come over and see you?”

  “Of course you can.”

  Chapter 16

  MONDAY MORNING at school without Andy was lonely, but Robby made his way to biology class, dragging his feet.

  “Hey, dude” came a familiar voice in the hallway.

  Robby looked up to find Max sprinting up to him. “Oh, hey, Max. I got to get to biology.”

  Max put a hand on Robby’s arm. “I heard about Saturday and what happened to Andy. It’s all over school.” He was looking into Robby’s face with worry and compassion.

  “Yeah,” Robby said. “Andy’s shaken up but okay. Did you hear about the Quiz Kids?”

  The grin crossing Max’s handsome face showed he most certainly had.

  “Pretty funny, huh? But I would rather we had won the tournament outright.” Robby shrugged.

  “I know. Well, you get on to class. Hey, did you get the announcement about graduation?”

  “My God! That’s in just a few weeks, right?” It struck Robby, whose mind had been full of recent events. “I guess we’re going to get our gowns and stuff soon.”

  Robby started to walk away, but he turned and called to the retreating Max, “Hey, you still going to WSU?”

  “Yeah, of course. And you know what?” He gave Robby a shy but happy grin.

  “What?”

  “I looked it up. They have a GLBT center and activities.” His smile was pure pleasure.

  Robby flashed him a grin. “All right!” Robby called and nodded. “It starts, huh?”

  Max nodded sharply. “It already has, my friend. It already has.” His shit-eating grin said it all.

  Robby went into the classroom and sat down on his usual stool, giving Andy’s empty one a wistful look.

  Mrs. Pollack called the class to order. “We have a guest speaker this morning.” Robby looked at the young woman who sat, dressed in a simple linen suit with her hair in a neat bun, in a chair at the front of the class.

  Mrs. Pollack introduced her as Josephine Eng. She explained that as they were in the section of the curriculum to talk about the range of sexual preferences, they were starting at one end of the continuum. She said that Ms. Eng represented an organization called the “Asexual Visibility and Awareness Network or AVEN.” She turned the floor over to the young woman, who stood and started to address the class.

  As she spoke about the facts about asexuality, Robby’s eyes grew wider and wider. As Ms. Eng explained, “Asexuality does not mean a lack of interest in sex at all, but only that the individual does not find either men or women sexually attractive. Unlike celibacy, which is a choice, asexuality is a sexual orientation. Asexual people have the same emotional needs as everybody else and are just as capable of forming intimate relationships.”

  She went on to say, “As humans, we are in general a social species, programmed to support each other in family units and communities, and it seems often mob rule dictates what is normal, expected, or acceptable behavior. Especially in a modern society where the media projects these ideas into every facet of our lives, we are now educated very early on as to how life apparently is. No matter what our true feelings inside, we may now attempt to adhere to the ‘rules’ that we have collectively set ourselves.”

  Robby thought about what she said. He knew full well how society pressured gay and lesbian people to be “straight,” and he had a new awareness of how it demanded a person identify as either a boy or a girl depending on certain external factors. Andy had taught him that one’s brain should determine what gender one is. But why did everyone think that whatever gender identity or sexual preference a person had, they had to have some preference? Why couldn’t someone find his or her place sexually other than on one end of the continuum or another? He or she could be either fully straight or fully gay or lesbian, or he or she could be asexual!

  He listened raptly as Ms. Eng went on, finding something familiar in every word. “I’ve long grown used to the idea of asexuality, and I know it fits me better than any other orientation. I know that I’ve never experienced sexual attraction. I do have a libido, and I find it a rather pointless part of my being. If I lost it—apart from the worry of a medical issue if it went!—I wouldn’t miss it. I am ‘out’ on all my frequent websites online and to my brother and cousin, but not to my parents because I know they wouldn’t accept it. It’s a lot easier to be ‘out’ online, but I did go to Pride London 2010 in order to help raise visibility, even though social situations and one-to-one visibility makes me very uncomfortable. I am one of those people to whom asexuality is just a part of who I am, not something I need to shout about for my own sake. I shout about it for the sake of others. I’m glad at least that I was stubborn in school. I’m glad that I’m not that romantically inclined, so I’m not in the desperate situation of trying to make a mixed-orientation relationship work. I’m glad that I got to know myself before having or trying to share myself with a life partner. If I had tried to have a girlfriend or, when same-sex marriage was made legal, a wife, I may have had the grim experience of cheating someone out of a complete relationship. At least complete in the traditional sense.”

  It felt like rockets were going off in Robby’s brain. He knew things might change for him, but this all sounded exactly right. It wasn’t that he was underdeveloped. He was just who he was. If Andy, who he knew he loved, didn’t want a sexless relationship, they would go their separate ways, or they would find a compromise. But he wondered if it was possible they could have the sort of partnership that some asexual people had.

  Mrs. Pollack opened the floor for the class to ask questions.

  “Have you ever had sex?” asked one girl.

  “I haven’t, but any number of asexual people have. Sometimes the desire coincides with an act. But with someone who is asexual, that is not necessarily what follows. Let me give you an example. Let’s say you smell coffee and think, ‘That smells good.’ That’s attraction. If you decide then that you want coffee, that’s desire. But you can smell and like the smell of coffee but not want any, and you can want coffee without smelling it first. I know this sounds confusing, but that’s how it is for me. I’d rather have a girlfriend I can cuddle with than go to her for an orgasm. But I can have an orgasm on my own.”

  The giggles and titters irritated Robby, who wanted to hear what Ms. Eng said without the distraction.

  “But won’t you just grow out of it?” a boy asked.

  “I might,” Ms. Eng said, “or I might not. I don’t think I will, given that I’m well into my twenties now, but if it happens, it happens.”

  One timid girl was so quiet that Ms. Eng had to ask her to speak up. She said, “It sounds like you’re describing just being human. I mean, I’m not always into… um… sex, but sometimes I might be.”

  Ms. Eng nodded. “The point is that you get to decide. Scientifically we know there is a continuum, but we can’t scientifically insist you be on any one point in it. That’s up to you at any given time.”

  “This is bullshit,” said one boy irritably. “You’re just frigid and want to make up a reason.”

  Robby looked at Mrs. Pollack to see if she would call the boy on his comment, but she just smiled thinly and let Ms. Eng respond. “You can say that, but you don’t really know, do you?”

  Another boy asked, “Can you just have sexual attraction if you are in a loving relationship but not otherwise?”

  Nodding, Ms. Eng said, “That might be called ‘demisexual’ or ‘gray asexual.’ Again, the point is that you get to decide who and what you are.”

  A girl sitting in the front row commented, “That sounds so lonely and sad. Don’t you want a husband and kids?”

  “I don’t,” said Ms. Eng. “But I know other asexual people who do. My friend Adam, for instance. He has a wife. They have two kids. They have a pretty typical marriage. They’ve been together for about twelve years. Like most married couples, sex has become less important for them. The only diffe
rence is that it never was for Adam. They’ve had their family and their partnership. That’s what matters. If you look at statistics, some married couples stop having sex at some point anyway, and that seems to be as true or truer for gay or lesbian couples. It’s not that strong a drive for a lot of people.”

  “Now that is depressing” came a boy’s voice from the third row.

  Ms. Eng said, “Only if you have other expectations. Some people find it rather comforting. Our society and the media preaches sex, sex, sex. There’s a lot more to life than that.”

  Robby couldn’t wait anymore. “If a person never feels sexual attraction for anyone ever, isn’t the choice being taken out of their hands?”

  With a knowing smile, Ms. Eng replied, “It might, or it might not. A person might find that to be the case, but it just isn’t up to anyone else.”

  Robby found himself thinking that what Ms. Eng was talking about was just a logical construct. If he accepted the concept of a continuum of sexuality, he would have to accept a starting point. That’s all it was, an idea. But then he thought about his own experience, which he had to admit tended to bear it all out.

  When Ms. Eng finished answering she reached for a stack of brochures and passed them out. They were from AVEN and its website. She said, “It has a FAQ which you can find at http://www.asexuality.org.”

  Robby couldn’t wait to talk this over with Andy, though at the same time he was terrified of how Andy would respond. He had trouble paying attention in his next classes and skipped lunch to call Andy. When he didn’t answer, Robby sent him a text, saying that in biology class they talked about something he needed to talk to him about.

  THAT AFTERNOON Andy answered his knock at the condo door.

  “Wow, you are hyped up. What’s this all about?”

  Robby asked, “Can we talk in your room?” When they got there, he closed and locked the door. He stood with his back to it, his hands in front of him, fidgeting. “I don’t know where to start, and I’m terrified what you will say. Let me start by just saying that I know I love you, that I’m in love with you. You make my heart sing, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. If you don’t feel the same way, well, that will be awful, but you have to do what’s right for you.”