by Cindi Madsen
“I was wondering…” My voice squeaked and I cleared my throat. “Jeez, I’m more nervous than if I were facing down a Lanister.”
Mick’s forehead scrunched up. “What?”
Oops. That only made sense if he watched Game of Thrones. Or maybe it didn’t, because Cooper rarely got my references.
He did say my fandom tendencies were one of the things he liked most about me, though.
Another round of stabbing pain jabbed at my chest, because my thoughts were totally against me.
“What I’m trying to ask is…” I twisted a strand of hair around my finger, finding a tiny bit of comfort in giving my hand something to do. “Well, you know how prom is in three weeks…?”
“Yeah. It’s all the girls at this school talk about—Paris goes on and on about how they need guys to help do the actual decorating, and under duress, I finally wrote my name on her damn signup form.”
On the bright side, at least you’re not making this one hundred times harder or anything. Since sarcasm wasn’t doing me any favors right now, I shoved it away. “Will you go to prom with me?”
Mick took my hand and I waited for him to let me down easy. “Yes. I’ll go to prom with you.”
I blinked at him, probably way too many times and for absolutely way too many seconds. “I was almost sure you’d already have a date.”
“A few girls have asked, but I was hoping to go with you. I even told my friends I was planning on it. I just didn’t know if asking would seem too serious—didn’t want to scare you off.”
Aw, he actually thought about it. That’s so nice. “Not too serious. I think it’ll be fun, and you’re the person I want to share my senior prom with.”
And if I could go back in time to before I accidentally fell for Cooper Callihan, that wouldn’t be a big, fat lie.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Cooper
Jaden got the green light to train as long as he kept his wrist wrapped, so he was healed and back to having full-use of his right arm again. We’d been putting in a lot of hours on the lake this week getting back to where we used to be. Which was good, since the Spring Festival race was on Saturday, just two days away.
If only I could gather enough strength to care.
My times with Kate weren’t quite as fast, but the minutes between were so much more than rowing. A couple of ducks swam away from the boat as we neared, and I stared at them, thinking of the time Kate threatened to jump overboard to hang out with birds instead of me.
Jaden looked at the stopwatch. “The time’s good, but you’re off, man. This wouldn’t have anything to do with Kate, would it?”
I jerked my gaze from the ducks and gripped my oars until the handles dug into my palms. “Nope.”
“Liar.”
I glared at him and he held up his hands. “I wouldn’t say anything, but I saw Kate this afternoon, and she doesn’t look so good, either.”
“Funny. Every time I see her, Pecker’s all over her.” Toxic bursts of heat traveled through my veins.
“Maybe,” Jaden said. “But her eyes go to you.”
“Oh, so now you’re an expert at girls?”
“Dude, I’ve always been an expert at girls.”
I rolled my eyes, but I laughed. Probably the only time I’d laughed all week, too. Things just weren’t as funny without Kate around. I tried to keep up appearances, going through the same motions I had before she crashed into my life and left her mark.
Everything pretty much went on the same as it had pre–Operation Prom Date, with the exception that Amber had started sitting with us at lunch. A rift had formed between her and Paris’s crew. She’d gone on and on about it, and how she was so over it, so this time she wasn’t going to apologize and try to fix it. Or something like that. Jaden and Alana had paid more attention to her occasional teary rants, because my head hadn’t been right since I kissed Kate.
Our fight only messed me up more, and then there was the tension at home. Dad worked late every night, and the few times we shared the same space, an unspoken heaviness hung in the air. I kept expecting him to push the subject of my major, or to bring up more arguments in favor of becoming a lawyer, but he didn’t bring it up. Almost as if the decision had already been made and written in stone, so there was no point in discussing it further.
Something I desperately wanted to talk to Kate about. I could really use her cheery optimism right now. I maneuvered the boat so it pointed back to shore, but Jaden dragged his oars. Since he seemed to be expecting me to open up and have a big share-fest, I gave him the shortest answer I could get away with. “She made her choice.”
“Did you even let her know she had one?”
That brought me up short.
But what good would it have done? Why pour out my heart when I already knew she’d choose Pecker? If I had to hear her say that she’d rather go with him, it’d destroy the act I put on in the school halls, where I pretended to be okay. Why make a fool of myself and add to the suckfest that losing her in every possible way had brought on?
“You’re really going to go to prom with Amber and just pretend everything’s cool?” Jaden pressed on, because he clearly didn’t know when to stop.
I dug down deep, pushing the oars through the water as hard as I could, since apparently I was rowing solo the rest of the trip to shore. The burn felt good in a way; it distracted from the other parts of me that felt broken. “I told her we could go, but we’d just be going as friends.”
“How magical for her,” Jaden said.
“You wanna go with her, be my guest.”
“Careful what you say. I tend to take people at their word.”
I dropped the oars and turned to face him. “You like Amber?”
He shrugged. Then he ran a hand over his hair. “I like Amber.”
“You liked Kate, too, before I told you not to bother,” I pointed out.
“Wrong. I said Kate was cute, and you looked like you might rip my head off for it, so I knew something was going on between you. But I like Amber. She and I have been talking a lot during lunch while you stare at Kate and pretend you’re not staring at her.”
I wanted to deny it, but I figured at this point, it didn’t matter. “If you like Amber, and she wants to go with you, I won’t stand in your way. It’d be a relief actually.”
“I’ll ask.” Jaden leaned forward, forearms braced on his knees, making it clear he was about to go all intervention on me. “But you need to talk to your girl.”
“She’s not mine.”
“And whose fault is that? And don’t you dare say Pecker’s. Until you make a move, it’s yours. You have to decide if you can live with that.”
…
For the rest of the day, I couldn’t get Jaden’s words out of my head. I couldn’t help thinking it was too late to do anything now, but if I waited and Kate and I didn’t fix things before we graduated, I’d definitely lose her for good.
For some reason, that brought back one clear detail of Amber’s ranting—somewhere in the mix, she said she’d regretted how things had ended with Kate, because she was an awesome friend, but she didn’t realize how awesome until she was gone.
Mom walked into the kitchen, bringing me back to the present and making me realize water was spilling over the top of my glass, onto the floor. I quickly righted it and sipped at the top while kicking at the puddle to dissolve it—hopefully before Mom noticed.
“Why haven’t you brought Kate over again?” Mom asked as she reached for an apple in the fruit bowl. “I didn’t embarrass you that badly, did I?”
“Kate and I aren’t really…” I let the rest of the sentence drop. Not hanging out with her anymore was hard enough without having to say it.
“That’s too bad. I liked her. It does explain why you’ve been as testy as your father lately.”
“Low blow,” I said.
Mom flashed me her no-nonsense look. “I thought it might be more inspirational.”
Great. Ev
idently everyone in my life thought I should be with Kate.
If only they could convince her, then we could all be happy.
She’ll be at the race, I bet.
My mind started spinning on what I could say to her. On how to undo the crappy stuff and get back to the good—even if friends were all we could ever be.
I thought of when she’d first explained shipping people to me, and an idea started taking shape.
I just couldn’t decide if it was totally genius, or totally insane.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Kate
I debated skipping the race part of the festival and sticking to the tented booths with crafts, handmade jewelry, and artery-clogging food. The occasional glimpses of Cooper that I caught during school made it clear that seeing him inflicted pain, even if from afar.
But all the hours I’d spent rowing made it hard to stay away. Not to mention the booths lined right up with where the race started.
I eyed the boats, alternatively hoping I’d spot Cooper’s blond waves in the crowd, while hoping I wouldn’t because of that whole aching thing.
“Looking for Cooper?” Mom whispered in my ear, and I jumped, nearly dropping my cotton candy.
“No,” I said.
“Oh, right. The football player—that’s who you like these days. I keep forgetting.”
I fought the urge to stick my tongue out at her. Instead I went for maturity and held the cotton candy out of reach when she tried to swipe a chunk.
Speaking of the football player, he was also competing, so I’d feel like a bad prom date if I didn’t support him. Even if I had given up thinking we’d be anything close to exclusive—in the words of Tswift—like, ever.
But at least he no longer thought of me as a hookup girl. After he agreed to be my prom date, I explained that if he was going with me because he thought I’d be so grateful and caught up in dance-night magic that we’d hookup afterward, he’d be greatly disappointed.
He told me that as long as he didn’t have to stop hooking up with other girls, he didn’t care. Talk about romance, FTW!
Honestly, it was nice not to pretend to be someone other than who I was. The pictures would be stunning, and I could always point at the framed photo sitting among my Funko Pop figurines on my bookshelf and brag about how I’d gone to prom with the quarterback and possible prom king, which he was a total shoo-in for.
The only thing better would be going with the guy I could now say for sure that I’d loved, even if only for a little while.
Okay, considering I’d switched my cyber-stalking habits from Mick to Cooper—who didn’t put nearly enough information online, FYI—I was possibly still in love with him. But considering his indifference toward me, I was trying to fall out of it.
Oh, look, there he is. The unyielding butterflies kicked up in my tummy, fluttering in that way they did just for him. He had his game face on as he picked up his number from the registration table. Dang, he looks cute. And ripped and tall… Why does he always have to look so freaking hot?
His waves were a bit wild, like he’d raked his hand through his hair several times. He must be nervous.
My fingers ached to reach out and squeeze his hand and provide the comfort that I used to be able to. Unfortunately, it would probably only make him mad, and I didn’t have stretchy fire-hose length arms anyway. Well, that last part wasn’t unfortunate, but I digress.
Yep, looking at him now, my act of not caring about him, or how we weren’t friends anymore, definitely digressed.
“You okay, hon?” Mom asked.
“I’m fine. I’m going to go find a closer seat to watch.”
Mom glanced back toward the tents.
“Go get that necklace,” I said. “And while you’re getting it, ask for the farmer dude’s number.”
Mom’s cheeks turned pink. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Um, hello, the sparks were flying between you and the guy in the booth next to the jewelry stand. I saw the flirty smiles, too.” I wrapped her in a side hug. “No one will ever replace Dad, but it’s okay to date and move on, Mom.”
In some ways, I needed to follow my own advice and not constantly be afraid that everything bad or hard that happened would only remind me of how much I missed him. I could miss him. I just couldn’t let it hold me back from taking risks.
“I’m about to go to college,” I continued, “and I know that I’m still going to live with you and all, but you don’t want to be the sad woman who watches TV with a bearded dragon every weekend while I’m out at those raging college parties.”
“Ha-ha.”
“I’m serious; Klaus and I talked about it, and we both worry. He’s mostly worried you’ll get three cats, and he’s not great at sharing the attention.”
A smile broke free and Mom glanced back at the row of tents again. “He was really cute. And he did seem interested.”
“Interested? There was shameless ogling on both sides.” I shoved her toward the tents. “Now go. And don’t come back until you’ve got his number.”
Her laugh trailed after her, and I watched her go, a mix of emotions swirling through me, but the top one was happiness for her. Mom’s willingness to put herself out there again encouraged me to stop being a wimp and head over to the stands. It might hurt to see Cooper, but I wouldn’t let that stop me from enjoying the race. Or doing a little cheering for my former training partner, no matter what’d happened between us.
I spotted Mrs. Callihan in the crowd, and when she looked my way, I waved.
The guy next to her had to be Cooper’s dad. He had the same blond coloring, but his features were on the austere side of the spectrum.
The thought of Cooper’s expression eventually turning so serious, just to make his dad happy dug at me, and my feet propelled me forward. Luckily I was no stranger to making a fool of myself—might as well do so for a good cause, even if it ended up being in vain.
“Mrs. Callihan.” I gave her a nod and turned to address her husband, my rapid pulse hammering behind my temples. “Sir, I know you don’t know me, but I just have to say that Cooper’s crazy smart, and he puts his heart into what he loves. I take full responsibility for him telling you that he doesn’t want to be a lawyer, but I hope someday you’ll realize that it’d be a shame if a career that made him unhappy drained him of his passion.”
The lines in Mr. Callihan’s forehead creased more with every sentence. With my piece delivered, my courage faded and the urge to flee took its place. “So…that’s all I have to say. And, um, it was nice to meet you.” I glanced at Mrs. Callihan, who beamed at me. “I’ll be cheering for Cooper. Okay, bye.”
“You must be Kate,” Mr. Callihan said as I backpedaled—and in typical fashion—bumped into a passerby.
“Did I forget that part? Yeah, I’m Kate.” I tentatively lifted my hand. “I’m a little afraid to shake your hand. Please don’t crush it.”
A low chuckle emanated from him. “Well, Kate. I know you don’t think my son should be a lawyer, but I’m starting to think you’d make a good one. I think you might just stun everyone into agreeing with you.”
“Thanks?”
“It’s a compliment coming from him,” Mrs. Callihan said, placing her hand on his arm. “A high one. And Cooper and his father are working on a compromise.”
“We are?” Mr. Callihan asked.
“You are,” she assured him in a tone I wouldn’t dare disagree with.
“Really? I’m so glad.” I bit my lip. “So yay and I’m sorry and I’ll get out of your hair.”
When I turned around, I nearly smacked into Jaden. “There you are,” he said. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”
“You have?” I lowered my eyebrows. “Why?”
“You can still row, right?”
“I haven’t been training the past week or so, but I didn’t, like, forget.”
“Good.” Jaden clamped on to my hand and started dragging me toward the row of
boats. “I need you to be my partner in the race.”
I dug in my heels. “No way. I came to watch the race, not to be in it. And even that’s going to be hard enough for me.”
Jaden spun to face me. “Cooper went crazy this morning and he says he’s going to row with someone else because I’m not fast enough.”
“Oh, Jaden, I’m so sorry.” I patted his arm, trying to show him I understood but also that he shouldn’t take it personally. “He just gets like that sometimes.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice about how he gets.” He tilted his head toward the line of boats in the water, where people busily fiddled around with them, wiggling oars and stretching for their big race. “Just come be my partner. Please.”
“I…” I had a feeling going out on the water to do something Cooper and I had done so many times would only add to the constant ache in my chest, but I didn’t want to leave Jaden hanging—he’d been so nice to me. The added please made it impossible to say no, too, dang it. “Okay. But is Cooper all right? I talked to his dad and—”
Jaden’s eyes widened. “You talked to his dad? That guy is scary.”
I nodded. “Oh, for sure. But he’s not as unreasonable as I thought.” Which might be attributed more to his wife, but still. “Seriously, Jaden, I need to know about Cooper. Is he okay?”
“Depends on the outcome of this race,” he said, his voice taking on a weird, cryptic tone.
Mick glanced up as we passed him and Vance, and he winked at me. “Wish me luck.”
“Good luck,” I automatically said. “Now that I’m in the race, you’re probably going to need it.”
The shock on his face made me laugh, but I couldn’t dwell on it, because Jaden dragged me toward his boat at a breakneck pace, no stopping to smell the roses.
As my crappy luck would have it, Cooper’s boat floated next to his, and Amber sat in there with him, in the front position. He’s rowing with Amber? My heart cracked, and I stumbled as Jaden urged me into the boat. I didn’t understand. Not how he could pick her over Jaden, and not why he wouldn’t be taking the lead. She couldn’t be strong enough to do it, could she?